GASLIGHTING

[Myth]

Honestly, I have strongly held opinions about some people's sociotypes, but I tend not to tell them that (unless asked), out of consideration both of my ignorance and their right to their own self-image.

I appreciate you advising me to do construction work in accordance with my type many years ago; it was actually good advice.

[Adam Strange]

I appreciate you advising me to do construction work in accordance with my type many years ago; it was actually good advice.

Thanks. I hope it worked out.

[immagocrazy]

I think that Socionics CAN be used this way, but that's not all there is to Socionics.

I see Socionics essentially as a classification scheme. It claims that certain "sociotypes" have certain characteristics, and they interact with other sociotypes in a predictable manner. It is only when insisting to a person that they "must" have certain characteristics, especially in light of the high probability of mis-typing that person, that things move into gaslighting territory. I call that "Battle-typing", and I try to avoid it.

Honestly, I have strongly held opinions about some people's sociotypes, but I tend not to tell them that (unless asked), out of consideration both of my ignorance and their right to their own self-image.

Sorry, I should have been a little more specific, but you took the conversation bait, so heh anyway.

What I mean is more the misunderstanding between different "information metabolism".
Take Ti and Fi, for example. There's a lot of overgeneralizations about Fi as just values, someone that tends to take impersonal things personally, or doesn't think things through. Ti is, defined by its Jungian introversion, as subjective. Yet I often, especially from MBTI enthusiasts (but not only), hear that Ti is "objective" and these people will go to great lengths to try and justify it as such. But it's not.

So there's that first. But what I'm more getting at is

A person with ego Fi judges Te (people's actions). They have their own internally formed heuristics that focuses on evaluating character and forming judgements about it. Intent and character of action is read (Fi), rather than just what is evidently expressed (Fe).

A person with ego Ti judges Fe. They also have internal heuristics and logical formulations, but its purpose is to categorize and judge the expressed feeling of those around them. Intent and character isn't the focus or it's not Ti.

The problem, essentially, is that the Ti ego interprets the Fi ego as judging Fe, because that's what "they" are focused on.
So the evaluation of the Fi ego gets reduced to "personal values or someone that tends to take impersonal things personally and doesn't properly think things through".
This projection is a form of gaslighting. And I believe it underlies the ranking of all the relations for each type to each other type. But not projecting is hard. It requires a lot of mindfulness and frequently stepping outside of one's self.

And since I know I don't value Ti or Fe, I don't know really know how a Ti ego would interpret Fi gaslighting them, so I won't try, but it would be interesting to hear how that's explained.

[Aster]

my husband gaslights me all the time, but I don’t think he does it on purpose. I think he genuinely remembers things the way he does. it’s bad memory and not paying attention. But it’s so frustrating to argue with. My memory isn’t stellar, but it’s not THAT bad. There def some selective psychological thing at play, too. Definitely ego driven.