Chapter 2: The External World With No Fi
Maritsa looked in the mirror and brushed her hair with a purple hairbrush. Since female staff wasn't allowed to be in the boys cabin, she had her office in one of the girl's cabins.
While brushing her hair, she got a sudden determined look on her face... and in a puff of black smoke, instantly teleported to a 7-11 to kill a man who short-changed a shy person because he was insecure and wouldn't say anything. And in another puff, she was back in her chair.
"Ah that's better, people really do need to learn how to be nicer" Maritsa said. She looked in the mirror, continuing to think about herself.
Maritsa Darmandzhyan was a special adventurer in that, she was equally bad-ass in both melee range and magic. While most people were stuck with one vantage point over the other, she had both without losing any strength in the other, allowing her to be such a powerful hero for good. The world is set up that the good guys are ideal writers who know what to do, but are unable to do it in the real world because they are so faggy, and the real world people own everything and keep the external world running but they have less morals. Not that they are evil or anything. They just are clearly aren't as good. Sometimes they're able to listen to a more faggy type and do the right thing but in reality it doesn't really work that often. By combining the two forces, she is the light in the world. The one with the greatest empathy, the greatest powers. She is Maritsa.
How this is occured is one time she was thinking crazily to herself while making a socionics post. She instantly realized every secret and nuance in the universe, and she blasted away from her computer which caused red energy sparks to fly. What she thought of was so interesting, so artistic, that it made even strrrng drop his jaw. However, it only made sense in maritsa's own head- and it would come across as crazy jibberish if a normal person heard it.
It was though she completely empowered herself, while paradoxically having empathy for every molecule in the universe. She had a nirvana without losing her body and exploding it to pieces all over your grandmother's face. Kurt Cobain killed himself to achieve Nirvana. But not Maritsa. Ommm!
Maritsa, although still an adventurer with us, was also in a league of her own, part of a special brand of heroes able to fuse their own identities with the outside world and use physical and magical powers equally. They are known as the Non-Dualists, a perfected Idea of non-duality.... which wasn't the non-duality of pure spirit that narcissistic Alex Marchand thought it was (http://www.alexandermarchand.com/), but included the weird and colorful egoic perceptions of Maritsa's own brain. How she will say something crazy like "You're not LSE anymore because you don't put socks in your dwarer neatly enough." Which drives anybody crazy if they take it seriously and are unable to see the magic behind it.
After all, if Oneness doesn't included the fragmented ego identity and colorful weirdness and hot-bad-ass sex (mmm maritsa in a black dress) , then it's not true Oneness but hypocritical Oneness, something Maritsa herself would kill.
Now you could perhaps say that Maritsa was on a higher level than other adventurers being a Non-Dualist, and that may or may not be true, but it would be wrapping things up too neatly. She was still too fucking crazy to lead an entire group of people in a raid boss fight, and so really - her role here in camp was perfect for her.
"Ms. Darmandzhyan we need to talk" a middle-aged man with a beer gut and gray-brow moustache called Greg Edwards said, but everybody just called him Ed. He was the Lead Director of Happy Campers, well this one branch anyway. He poked his head in maritsa's office which she almost always left open in case a girl needed her guidance.
"You're not supposed to be in the girl's cabin" Maritsa said softly to him. "And please call me Maritsa. I think we've built up enough of a Fi connection for you to call me by my first name."
Ed didn't even know what Fi meant of course so he just ignored that. "You women and your rules" Ed chuckled. "I know, I ain't being a pervert or nothin'. I just needed to talk with ya. It's an emergency."
"Yes?" Maritsa said like a helpful girl scout. The one that gives you Tagalongs, not Thin Mints.
"Brad's parents wanted to talk to him... he hasn't been seen anywhere on campus for days. The other boys don't know where he is. The last person he was seen with was you in your gym office. Alone..." Ed said. "Now look, I ain't gonna get the cops involved cuz I ain't no damn socialist and I ain't gonna make a big stink of him bein' missing cuz I know he just left himself cuz his car ain't in the lot no more. I just wanted to know what you said to him to make him leave."
Maritsa smiled. She knew that Ed wouldn't understand her secret. That she had powers, that she was on a mission to rid the world of people with no Empathy. And yes, Brad took his own car to camp and Maritsa had destroyed the evidence with a big red energy ball from her Shadow Priest half. Magic can purely destroy, turn something into nothing; just as it can purely create something out of nothing. So to others it looked like Brad had just left on his own.
"He was just...unable to see the light" Maritsa said.
"What dat supposed ta mean?" Ed said. "I'm just a simple guy running a camp here ma'am" Ed said. "I don't have my degree in social work like you uppity female types" he laughed. "Care to be more... specific?"
Ah yes, technical and straight man like. Maritsa thought, thinking of her friend Sam. How she loved homosexual humans.
"Let's just say that when people lack empathy, they deserved to be disposed of" Maritsa said, trying to be as subtle as possible. She winked at Ed hoping that he would get it.
Ed just made a funny confused face. "I know Brad can give the other kids a hard time some times but you know boys will be boys." Ed held up his beer gut and reminisced fondly at past childhood memories. "Haha I remember when i was a boy I loved sticking firecrackers up frog's anuses with my buds. We even did it to a cat one time."
Maritsa just looked at Ed, listening to that story and frowning. "Now that wasn't very nice" Maritsa said.
"Of course it wasn't nice!" Ed said. "That was the whole point. Haha youse broads and your 'nice.' Ed chuckled and shook his head. "Brad's parents have a lot of dough, and they make this camp very successful" Ed said. He winked at Maritsa. "Surely we can bend morals a bit to accommodate that."
"Is that all you care about, money?" Maritsa said.
"That's how this place runs, that's what america is founded upon!" Ed said, all fat and arrogant and american like. You could even see a little bit of green snot in his nose, yuck.
"Now I love money because I dual seek the function Te of efficiency-"
"What is all this damn crap about Fi, and Te... you ramble on about that nonsense and nobody knows what yer talking about!" Ed said.
"Please do not interrupt me, it's rude" Maritsa said smiling. "Now as I was saying. Money is not the enemy just like Brad's macho behavior wasn't the enemy. But if you lack Fi and empathy and also be that way that's what the problem is. It's like if-"
"But I am doing the right thing! The boy's gone missing and his folks are worried and I'm talking to the only person who's seen him last!"
"You interrupted me again" Maritsa said. "And no you're not doing the right thing. Not really. You came here asking about Brad to make *yourself* look good, and to keep his parent's money flowing in. You care nothing about Brad, Brad's parents... or anybody else but yourself and your own narcissistic image. It is okay to care about ourselves but we must care about others too. I am sorry that you still don't understand Empathy..."
"And I'm sorry that you're a stuck up cunt who thinks she's better than me cuz of that damn sissy schoolin!" Ed said. "Oh wait a minute, no I'm not - cuz feeling sorry is a weakness." He said that just like Brad.
"The external world cares only about what is strong, but Fi cares about is *right.* The world is all dark with no heart and morals if we are not kind to each other" Maritsa said.
Ed just laughed. "The weak deserved to be bullied" he said.
Marita cocked her head to the side. "Oh really?" she said. "I'm sure if a stick of dynamite went off in *your* ass, it would feel like a trip to Disneyland?"
"No, but... nobody would do that to me cuz I'm tough!" Ed said proudly.
Maritsa sighed. She held out her left hand and conjured an exploding stick of dynamite.
"Oh Ed. You're not the sharpest camp counselor in the cabin, are you?"
"What the... where did you..." Ed's eyes wide open in fear.
"It made you happy what you did this to those animals. Not just happy. Ecstatic." Maritsa read Ed's black soul even more. "You sicko you even did this to an autistic child once too, and to an elderly woman in a nursing home. Well I'm sorry that this is the only way to make you learn...."
And with that, Maritsa telekinetically pushed back Ed's shorts, and calmly walked over and physically dropped the stick of dynamite down Gregory Edward's pants. He was just frozen in place and shaking. She walked back to where she was previously standing, turned around, and watched him explode to bits.
"Empathy is so bad-ass, isn't it?" she said to the camera. She looked around the room, at Ed's guts all over her walls. She wiggled her nose like the witch in Bewitched and made her office all sparkly again. All pure and clean and white and Fi. Just like she was.
Maritsa sighed happily to herself, looked in the mirror, and went back to brushing her hair.
16types Adventures: Maritsa Mini-Series (10 Chapters.)
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(as per tcaudilllg)
Originally Posted by Gilly
