hi

[blackburry]

why would any of that make me change my mind? lol

i totally relate to the facial expression thing. and i'm still renewing my drivers permit at age 28. i'll probably just end up buying my own car that i can't even legally drive myself so i can get practice because its been so long that i know i wouldn't pass the test right now and i refuse to call people and ask if i can practice driving their cars. my ex let me drive maybe like 3 times in the 9 years we were together - he always had some excuse, or he'd pull some shit like saying to me when i woke up at 10am, "oh i was going to practice driving with you but you slept too long and now i have to go do something" and then bringing that up whenever i wanted to drive as an example of me not really being committed to it. i paid for driving lessons a few years ago and took the test, absolutely aced everything, kicked ass at parallel parking, and then drove the wrong way down a one-way lol. it makes me wonder if i was unconsciously trying to sabotage myself because if i really wanted my license you'd think i'd have it by now. its frustrating and embarassing. NOWWW do YOU still think we're identicals?

the thing about accidentally stealing someones chair - as far as big deals go: worrying about it > doing it. idk, being a klutz seems like the most minor of flaws everr. in the twilight books the only flaw that bella had was being a klutz and thats why she was a perfect mary sue lol.

mary sue?

lol, I can't even drive downtown because no matter how viligant I try to be about paying attention to one way streets... I always end up turning onto one the wrong way 1/2 of the time, the signs are so small. And at least 89% time I get lost. My GPS always sends me down backroads and overcomplicates any trip so I've tried to not even use it, but when I do... I'll secondguess where I'm going and end up having to take the next exit after the one I was supposed to take and miss turns. Just visiting my sister in her new house who lives 25 minutes away took me an hour to get there (it was my 2nd time going).. I was so lost, I feel like I have a general sense of direction... but, where's the sign pointing, the next exit...this exit? wtf, that was an exit? looked just like a small side street...guess so..then have to do two different u-turns or pull into a parking lot to turn around. and then start over. My LSE sister finds it hilarious and won't answer her phone to give me directions, but on the way home, she wrote out very specific directions and I made it back in 15 minutes..

Yeah I hate driving other people's vehicles (and most people don't let me...); practicing is the easiet way to get better, but I've been driving for 4 years now... at least you're great at parallel parking, I hate it.

I guess I see being a klutz is a big flaw... Like I'm a liability: the simplest things are complicated and something that should take only a small chunk of my time will end up taking half the day... like I was in a rush and tried to close the bottom drawer of fridge with my foot..and my foot goes throw the plastic...and now...there's a big cracked hole in it.
I try to be more aware, but even that seems to not work. And being overly cautious about every little thing is tedious and draining, my EII friend does this... and she loves to hang around me because she say's I "spice up" her life. people either think it's really cute or really annoying. it doesn't happen every day but atleast once every few days something happens.. like once I dented my ex's truck by accident, and washed his phone in his pants (the one time I didn't check his pockets it was in there)...and.. hit my parents mailbox with my car when I was in a rush and had my brother put it back up before they got home.
at the end of the day, I'm usually like, whatev.. today was eventful... and then try not to think about it. but other people notice it as start to see me as irresponsible.