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Thread: Kim's type (split from "Breaking up with a dual")

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    Default Kim's type (split from "Breaking up with a dual")

    Quote Originally Posted by Kim View Post
    I agree. I had this feeling when I broke up with an ILI, but not with my dual (although that was painful, too). I don't think it has anything to do with duality. Duality is more effortless than other relationships, but emotional intensity is not type-related.
    I read through some of your posts last night. (Don't worry I'm not singling you out, I do this with everybody who says they broke up with a dual) IEE's put everyone under the microscope, it's nothing personal.

    Your posts struck me as very EIE. Have you considered this type before? In that case the ILI would have been your supervisor. The SLI would have been your conflictor. Have you ever been in a relationship with an LSI can I ask?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Eye of the Potato View Post
    I read through some of your posts last night. (Don't worry I'm not singling you out, I do this with everybody who says they broke up with a dual) IEE's put everyone under the microscope, it's nothing personal.

    Your posts struck me as very EIE. Have you considered this type before? In that case the ILI would have been your supervisor. The SLI would have been your conflictor. Have you ever been in a relationship with an LSI can I ask?
    Really? I have never considered EIE because I don't identify with beta values. What about my posts strikes you as EIE?

    I doubt my ex was my conflictor. The comfort level and mutual understanding was very significant. It was an effortless relationship on many levels. My current boyfriend is SLE and it takes much more effort to make it work. I have never been in a relationship with an LSI.

    I really doubt I am EIE, but I am curious to hear what it is that makes you assume this type for me?
    “Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
    ― Anais Nin

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kim View Post
    Really? I have never considered EIE because I don't identify with beta values. What about my posts strikes you as EIE?

    I doubt my ex was my conflictor. The comfort level and mutual understanding was very significant. It was an effortless relationship on many levels. My current boyfriend is SLE and it takes much more effort to make it work. I have never been in a relationship with an LSI.

    I really doubt I am EIE, but I am curious to hear what it is that makes you assume this type for me?
    I just got a feeling of EIE. It wasn't anything specific, just a general feeling.

    I noticed from your political discussions, that there was a lack of alternative solutions posted by you. As an IEE, if I were having political discussions, I would offer a better way of doing things. I would give insights gained from many sources and use those insights to think up a better way to approach a problem. For instance, I was once in a debate about Capitalism vs. Socialism. I used the insights I got from a book called the tipping point, to argue that Socialism can't work when it is set up by a central government. The reason for this, was that when a groups size reaches 150 people, cohesion is lost and groups begin to splinter off. If Socialism had any chance of working, communities would have to be made up of 150 people.

    I saw no evidence of you doing this, in any of your posts. In fact when someone argued with you, you berated them with things like "oh well I thought this was going to be an enjoyable conversation" and didn't really hear their side of the argument out. An IEE would try their hardest to understand where the other person was coming from, even if they didn't agree with what they were saying. An IEE might not always do this, but on the whole they would, and on the whole, you have not.

    Also, you seem to flip/flop on typing others. And I have seen a few contradictions in how you describe your relations with different types. You mentioned being irked by an SLE at a party, citing his Se as being unbearable,yet you now claim to be in a relationship with an SLE (who you thought was SEE for a long time, they use Se too)

    You say things went very smoothly with the SLI. I think you have misunderstood what duality is. It doesn't run as smooth as I think you have been lead to believe. The innitial running in period is anything but smooth, especially if both of you have had no experience with a dual growing up.

    On closer inspection I am thinking you could possibly be SEE. It's hard to type someone from a forum and probably silly to do so, but I don't think you show much signs of being IEE. You might say you do things you think an IEE would do, but being tied to a certain type, it sometimes happens that people act the way they expect their type to act.

    If you are SEE, it would explain why there weren't many misunderstandings with the SLI and it would also explain why you felt the way you did about the ILI. Assuming they were both typed correctly that is.

    What is it specifically about beta values that you don't value?

    And what is it about delta values that appeals to you?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Eye of the Potato View Post
    I just got a feeling of EIE. It wasn't anything specific, just a general feeling.

    I noticed from your political discussions, that there was a lack of alternative solutions posted by you. As an IEE, if I were having political discussions, I would offer a better way of doing things. I would give insights gained from many sources and use those insights to think up a better way to approach a problem. For instance, I was once in a debate about Capitalism vs. Socialism. I used the insights I got from a book called the tipping point, to argue that Socialism can't work when it is set up by a central government. The reason for this, was that when a groups size reaches 150 people, cohesion is lost and groups begin to splinter off. If Socialism had any chance of working, communities would have to be made up of 150 people.

    I saw no evidence of you doing this, in any of your posts. In fact when someone argued with you, you berated them with things like "oh well I thought this was going to be an enjoyable conversation" and didn't really hear their side of the argument out. An IEE would try their hardest to understand where the other person was coming from, even if they didn't agree with what they were saying. An IEE might not always do this, but on the whole they would, and on the whole, you have not.

    Also, you seem to flip/flop on typing others. And I have seen a few contradictions in how you describe your relations with different types. You mentioned being irked by an SLE at a party, citing his Se as being unbearable,yet you now claim to be in a relationship with an SLE (who you thought was SEE for a long time, they use Se too)

    You say things went very smoothly with the SLI. I think you have misunderstood what duality is. It doesn't run as smooth as I think you have been lead to believe. The innitial running in period is anything but smooth, especially if both of you have had no experience with a dual growing up.

    On closer inspection I am thinking you could possibly be SEE. It's hard to type someone from a forum and probably silly to do so, but I don't think you show much signs of being IEE. You might say you do things you think an IEE would do, but being tied to a certain type, it sometimes happens that people act the way they expect their type to act.

    If you are SEE, it would explain why there weren't many misunderstandings with the SLI and it would also explain why you felt the way you did about the ILI. Assuming they were both typed correctly that is.

    What is it specifically about beta values that you don't value?

    And what is it about delta values that appeals to you?
    You sound Ti.

    Here's a thread generally about Fi..http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...k-what-I-found
    Last edited by female; 12-19-2011 at 04:18 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Nemo View Post
    You sound Ti.

    Here's a thread generally about Fi..http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...k-what-I-found
    Ha ha. Are you trying to wind me up?

    What does Oprah have to do with anything? Is that all just part of the wind up?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Eye of the Potato View Post
    Ha ha. Are you trying to wind me up?

    What does Oprah have to do with anything? Is that all just part of the wind up?
    No, I'm not winding you up. The entire post you made to Kim was basically protesting her Ti polr. Yes, Ti polr. Newsflash, IEES HAVE TI POLR. Newsflash, you are probably not IEE. And no, it's not about Oprah, are you kidding me? You seriously could not see the point there? "WHAT DOES OPRAH HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING"?! Are you seriously cherrypicking a name that is included in the subject matter I posted to represent my point? Are you retarded?

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    I noticed from your political discussions, that there was a lack of alternative solutions posted by you. As an IEE, if I were having political discussions, I would offer a better way of doing things. I would give insights gained from many sources and use those insights to think up a better way to approach a problem. For instance, I was once in a debate about Capitalism vs. Socialism. I used the insights I got from a book called the tipping point, to argue that Socialism can't work when it is set up by a central government. The reason for this, was that when a groups size reaches 150 people, cohesion is lost and groups begin to splinter off. If Socialism had any chance of working, communities would have to be made up of 150 people.
    Recent political discussions I have engaged in are not as involved as early ones. If you go back several years, you will find efforts to point out alternative scenarios, bringing in new information, linking to sources, etc. I had extensive discussions about political issues, international development questions, etc.

    I saw no evidence of you doing this, in any of your posts. In fact when someone argued with you, you berated them with things like "oh well I thought this was going to be an enjoyable conversation" and didn't really hear their side of the argument out. An IEE would try their hardest to understand where the other person was coming from, even if they didn't agree with what they were saying. An IEE might not always do this, but on the whole they would, and on the whole, you have not.
    I have known many people on here for many years and have debated with them before, so in many cases I know their point of view. And I don't think I berate people for disagreeing with me. I might do it when I think they attack me personally or become irate or something like that.

    Also, you seem to flip/flop on typing others.
    I don't think I flip/flop any more than others do. And isn't flip/flopping an IEE trait? Ne dominant / Ti PoLR = tendency to flip/flop

    And I have seen a few contradictions in how you describe your relations with different types. You mentioned being irked by an SLE at a party, citing his Se as being unbearable,yet you now claim to be in a relationship with an SLE (who you thought was SEE for a long time, they use Se too)
    The SLE at the party is an insecure SLE who tries to show off and grab all the attention in the room and it was extremely annoying and grating. My partner is a very confident SLE who does not see the need to show off. He does do some SLE posturing occasionally and it annoys me. They might be the same type, but with very different maturity and confidence levels.

    You say things went very smoothly with the SLI. I think you have misunderstood what duality is. It doesn't run as smooth as I think you have been lead to believe. The innitial running in period is anything but smooth, especially if both of you have had no experience with a dual growing up.
    I very strongly believe that duality is characterized by effortless mutual understanding. Of course there will be the initial awkwardness because even an IEE will have to assess SLI's Fe PoLR ("doesn't he like me or is he just stand-offish?"). I did go through a bit of that with my ex, but it was short and afterward it was a smooth ride in terms of knowing and catering to each other's needs. Whenever Slacker Mom talks about her SLI husband, I am reminded of my ex (they even look very similar). I also relate to what she says about their relationship (no verbal expression of love, but caring acts like putting gas in the car, bringing food home, taking me out for a ride, etc.).

    On closer inspection I am thinking you could possibly be SEE. It's hard to type someone from a forum and probably silly to do so, but I don't think you show much signs of being IEE. You might say you do things you think an IEE would do, but being tied to a certain type, it sometimes happens that people act the way they expect their type to act.
    SEE is the second possible scenario for me, but I have two very close SEE (Fi sub) friends and I am not quite like them.

    If you are SEE, it would explain why there weren't many misunderstandings with the SLI and it would also explain why you felt the way you did about the ILI. Assuming they were both typed correctly that is.
    There were far more misunderstandings and "hickups" with the ILI than with the SLI. The SLI and I broke up because of external circumstances. If our life plans had meshed, we would probably still be together.

    What is it specifically about beta values that you don't value?
    Beta, to me, has a rogue teenager / artsy / rebellious / aggressive air to it that I don't relate to. When I was younger I did, to some extent, and might have believed that I could be IEI, but I see more value in changing the world by doing good things for other creatures than by overthrowing the status quo.

    And what is it about delta values that appeals to you?
    I am not (generally) a calm person myself, so I enjoy being around deltas because they calm me down and want to take care of my needs. I see deltas as open-minded (and betas generally say the opposite of deltas) and generous.
    “Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
    ― Anais Nin

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    [
    QUOTE=Kim;835418]Recent political discussions I have engaged in are not as involved as early ones. If you go back several years, you will find efforts to point out alternative scenarios, bringing in new information, linking to sources, etc. I had extensive discussions about political issues, international development questions, etc.
    Fair enough. Can you remember anything that excited you specifically?






    I don't think I flip/flop any more than others do. And isn't flip/flopping an IEE trait? Ne dominant / Ti PoLR = tendency to flip/flop
    I never really flip/flopped on my type. I found a few people difficult to type, but on the whole I have typed people correctly, consistently. The ones I found difficult to type were people I didn't know very well. I think it is because IEE's see the essence of people. It's easier for us to type people.



    The SLE at the party is an insecure SLE who tries to show off and grab all the attention in the room and it was extremely annoying and grating. My partner is a very confident SLE who does not see the need to show off. He does do some SLE posturing occasionally and it annoys me. They might be the same type, but with very different maturity and confidence levels.
    Fair enough.



    I very strongly believe that duality is characterized by effortless mutual understanding. Of course there will be the initial awkwardness because even an IEE will have to assess SLI's Fe PoLR ("doesn't he like me or is he just stand-offish?"). I did go through a bit of that with my ex, but it was short and afterward it was a smooth ride in terms of knowing and catering to each other's needs. Whenever Slacker Mom talks about her SLI husband, I am reminded of my ex (they even look very similar). I also relate to what she says about their relationship (no verbal expression of love, but caring acts like putting gas in the car, bringing food home, taking me out for a ride, etc.).
    I don't agree with this. I have seen too many accounts of drama filled dual relationships for this to be true. Duals are very different. Mutual misunderstanding is bound to happen. The thing that keeps them together is the fact that they realise it was just a misunderstanding. They actually want the same things but have a different approach. With ego relations, you have misunderstandings coupled with wanting different things.


    SEE is the second possible scenario for me, but I have two very close SEE (Fi sub) friends and I am not quite like them.
    Do people often tell you that what you just said is deep? Is this one of the differences between you?


    There were far more misunderstandings and "hickups" with the ILI than with the SLI. The SLI and I broke up because of external circumstances. If our life plans had meshed, we would probably still be together.
    But your feelings for the ILI were more intense?


    Beta, to me, has a rogue teenager / artsy / rebellious / aggressive air to it that I don't relate to. When I was younger I did, to some extent, and might have believed that I could be IEI, but I see more value in changing the world by doing good things for other creatures than by overthrowing the status quo.
    IEE's hate the status quo. Ne likes change.



    I am not (generally) a calm person myself, so I enjoy being around deltas because they calm me down and want to take care of my needs. I see deltas as open-minded (and betas generally say the opposite of deltas) and generous.
    [/QUOTE]

    Maybe you're gamma?

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    Here are my observations about Kim's type:

    She often does not tend towards analysis of Ti kind; she's not concerned about analysis in categories, deciphering commonalities/differences in what is said, claimed, or intended; she's Ti PoLR and devalues Ti because she doesn't necessary enjoy it or like being in a Ti environment. She doesn't enjoy me telling her the differences between two things and sifting or dividing things into categories; to her some things seem like they are all the same thing, because of this she has poor control or handle on Ti. You may observe this about Kim in "Maritsa, what's your 5 day plan" thread.
    Written by Kim in response to my post above. LOL

    Very true. In the case of that thread, trying to decipher the difference seemed non-productive because I don't think it is material in determining someone's type. I don't like to theoretical systems with no connection to reality because they seem pointless.I live the Ti to you, Maritsa.
    Last edited by Beautiful sky; 02-04-2012 at 08:11 PM.
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    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 2w1sw(1w9) helps others to live up to their own standards of what a good person is and is very behind the scenes in the process.
    Tritype 1-2-6 stacking sp/sx


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa33 View Post
    She often does not tend towards analysis of Ti; she's not concerned about analysis in categories, deciphering commonalities/differences in what is said, claimed, or intended; she Ti PoLR because she doesn't necessary enjoy it or like being in a Ti environment. She doesn't enjoy me telling her the differences between two things and sifting or dividing things into categories, to her some things seem like they are all the same thing, because of this poor control or handle on Ti. You may observe this about Kim in "Maritsa, what's your 5 day plan" thread.
    Okay, Kim isn't a Ti type. She's doesn't enjoy categorising and dividing.

    I look left and I look right. Looks like there's a lot of Ti types on here but don't tell anyone. It is going to be out little secret.

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    maritsa she accidentally hit the 'edit post' button instead of 'reply'. it's something that all moderators mistakenly do at some point. there is no conspiracy or people logging into your account.

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    Quote Originally Posted by bionicgerbil View Post
    there is no conspiracy or people logging into your account.
    It wouldn't make any sense either. If she could log into your account, you'd see "last edited by Maritsa" and not by kim.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pa3s View Post
    It wouldn't make any sense either. If she could log into your account, you'd see "last edited by Maritsa" and not by kim.
    yup.

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    Quote Originally Posted by bionicgerbil View Post
    maritsa she accidentally hit the 'edit post' button instead of 'reply'. it's something that all moderators mistakenly do at some point. there is no conspiracy or people logging into your account.
    I'm not saying that she did this on purpose; it must be some kind of a system error.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 2w1sw(1w9) helps others to live up to their own standards of what a good person is and is very behind the scenes in the process.
    Tritype 1-2-6 stacking sp/sx


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa33 View Post
    I'm not saying that she did this on purpose; it must be some kind of a system error.
    not a system error. the 'edit post' button is where you're used to the 'reply' button being before becoming a moderator. it's an easy mistake to make until you've made it.

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    Haha, this forum is completely bonkers.

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    Quote Originally Posted by bionicgerbil View Post
    not a system error. the 'edit post' button is where you're used to the 'reply' button being before becoming a moderator. it's an easy mistake to make until you've made it.
    That's what happened. And I was wondering where my post was... Sorry Maritsa! Thanks for clarifying, BG! <3
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    Quote Originally Posted by bionicgerbil View Post
    not a system error. the 'edit post' button is where you're used to the 'reply' button being before becoming a moderator. it's an easy mistake to make until you've made it.
    I did this once, ergh. And to .... drumroll ... tcaud!!!!!!! Argherlkerjkejwkjekrjkejrkejkslkdjlkjzldkfj.

    I had to go back in and reconstruct his post based on the history.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    This is weird someone just logged on and edited my post? WTH? Kim...what are you doing? You posted this under my account? How can you edit or post as me? " Last edited by Kim; Today at 11:38 AM."
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    Kim is most likely IEE or SEE type; she seems more IEE to me because, although she seems like she's will-full, she's actually not interested in having her will on me. She comes off more "here, I want to teach you something" or "here, I want to show you another aspect of this," which is more like the teaching relationship that is common with Mirror relations.
    Last edited by Beautiful sky; 02-04-2012 at 08:27 PM.
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    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 2w1sw(1w9) helps others to live up to their own standards of what a good person is and is very behind the scenes in the process.
    Tritype 1-2-6 stacking sp/sx


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    That's my suspicious nature
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 2w1sw(1w9) helps others to live up to their own standards of what a good person is and is very behind the scenes in the process.
    Tritype 1-2-6 stacking sp/sx


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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