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Thread: Do you prefer quiet or loud love?

  1. #81
    Breaking stereotypes Suz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by he died with a felafel View Post
    funny how all the self-proclaimed quiet love people are shpillin' the beans on how extremely quiet they are - now i know all about their oh-so-quiet lovies
    So are you saying that describing one's preferences for quiet love means that one can't be quiet about loving? It's not like we're involved in PDAs or loud demonstrations of affections here in this thread... Sorry but I just dont see the contradiction or mutual exclusion here..
    Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx

  2. #82
    Breaking stereotypes Suz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Reuben View Post
    Jess/Wawa

    SLI-IEE relationship.
    I'm glad to see you learned a little socionics from my typing thread.
    Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx

  3. #83
    Memory of Tomorrow Reuben's Avatar
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    No i learnt it from your gentle tutorship and lots of carrots.
    She is wise
    beyond words
    beautiful within
    her soul
    brighter than
    the sun
    lovelier than
    love
    dreams larger
    than life
    and does not
    understand the
    meaning of no.
    Because everything
    through her, and in her, is
    "Yes, it will be done."


    Why I love LSEs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Abbie
    A couple years ago I was put in charge of decorating the college for Valentine's Day. I made some gorgeous, fancy decorations from construction paper, glue, scissors, and imagination. Then I covered a couple cabinets with them. But my favorite was the diagram of a human heart I put up. So romantic!

  4. #84
    Glorious Member mu4's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by octopuslove View Post
    I hear you. It took me about six months to not feel awkward holding hands with my boyfriend, both in public and in private.
    Wierd, I hold hands with women I'm not even in a relationship with amongst other things, public and private.

    I feel a lot more comfortable about this stuff then actually having a relationship, or whatever it is people do to express this.

    It's easier for me to deal with people I like but don't "like".

  5. #85
    Memory of Tomorrow Reuben's Avatar
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    I don't hold hands with the women I really like because the women I really like don't like holding hands until they say "i'm your girlfriend". And chances are those 2 things happen simultaneously. Or something.
    She is wise
    beyond words
    beautiful within
    her soul
    brighter than
    the sun
    lovelier than
    love
    dreams larger
    than life
    and does not
    understand the
    meaning of no.
    Because everything
    through her, and in her, is
    "Yes, it will be done."


    Why I love LSEs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Abbie
    A couple years ago I was put in charge of decorating the college for Valentine's Day. I made some gorgeous, fancy decorations from construction paper, glue, scissors, and imagination. Then I covered a couple cabinets with them. But my favorite was the diagram of a human heart I put up. So romantic!

  6. #86
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    I only hold hands with my boyfriend, for my it's the sign we are a couple. Holding hands is something that make people feel very close, as if they unite or something .

  7. #87
    Darn Socks DirectorAbbie's Avatar
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    Update: Regarding declarations of feelings, I am in theory against there being more than one since it becomes redundant so easily. But sometimes it is hard to keep that in check, which is where whispering behind someone's back can come in handy.

    LSE
    1-6-2 so/sx
    Johari Nohari

    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

  8. #88
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    I don't like PDA around family members. The thought of scarring their memory of me with something so insignificant as a french kiss is frightening to me. I think it's most comforting when done around other couples, since I tend to notice how the "third wheel" in my party (namely, those who are single), are disgusted with open displays of affection. Quiet love is more preferable, because it saves all of the "guster you could muster" for "I love you's" in a powerful way.

  9. #89
    Memory of Tomorrow Reuben's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by complicated abbie
    which is where whispering behind someone's back can come in handy.
    She is wise
    beyond words
    beautiful within
    her soul
    brighter than
    the sun
    lovelier than
    love
    dreams larger
    than life
    and does not
    understand the
    meaning of no.
    Because everything
    through her, and in her, is
    "Yes, it will be done."


    Why I love LSEs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Abbie
    A couple years ago I was put in charge of decorating the college for Valentine's Day. I made some gorgeous, fancy decorations from construction paper, glue, scissors, and imagination. Then I covered a couple cabinets with them. But my favorite was the diagram of a human heart I put up. So romantic!

  10. #90
    Darn Socks DirectorAbbie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Reuben View Post
    I say it, nobody hears it, everyone's happy.

    LSE
    1-6-2 so/sx
    Johari Nohari

    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

  11. #91
    Memory of Tomorrow Reuben's Avatar
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    Sounds good. Shall learn from you.
    She is wise
    beyond words
    beautiful within
    her soul
    brighter than
    the sun
    lovelier than
    love
    dreams larger
    than life
    and does not
    understand the
    meaning of no.
    Because everything
    through her, and in her, is
    "Yes, it will be done."


    Why I love LSEs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Abbie
    A couple years ago I was put in charge of decorating the college for Valentine's Day. I made some gorgeous, fancy decorations from construction paper, glue, scissors, and imagination. Then I covered a couple cabinets with them. But my favorite was the diagram of a human heart I put up. So romantic!

  12. #92
    Memory of Tomorrow Reuben's Avatar
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    I'M FUCKING QUIET, ALSO I LOVE YOU GUYS AND WANT TO HUG YOU ALL LOLOLOLOL I DON'T BELIEVE IN PDA HAHAHAHA EVERYONE YAY
    She is wise
    beyond words
    beautiful within
    her soul
    brighter than
    the sun
    lovelier than
    love
    dreams larger
    than life
    and does not
    understand the
    meaning of no.
    Because everything
    through her, and in her, is
    "Yes, it will be done."


    Why I love LSEs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Abbie
    A couple years ago I was put in charge of decorating the college for Valentine's Day. I made some gorgeous, fancy decorations from construction paper, glue, scissors, and imagination. Then I covered a couple cabinets with them. But my favorite was the diagram of a human heart I put up. So romantic!

  13. #93
    Memory of Tomorrow Reuben's Avatar
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    sorry hand slipped.
    She is wise
    beyond words
    beautiful within
    her soul
    brighter than
    the sun
    lovelier than
    love
    dreams larger
    than life
    and does not
    understand the
    meaning of no.
    Because everything
    through her, and in her, is
    "Yes, it will be done."


    Why I love LSEs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Abbie
    A couple years ago I was put in charge of decorating the college for Valentine's Day. I made some gorgeous, fancy decorations from construction paper, glue, scissors, and imagination. Then I covered a couple cabinets with them. But my favorite was the diagram of a human heart I put up. So romantic!

  14. #94
    Memory of Tomorrow Reuben's Avatar
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    If you muffle my mouth with your hand and bind me up and tell me how much you love me... yea I suppose I'm mute.
    She is wise
    beyond words
    beautiful within
    her soul
    brighter than
    the sun
    lovelier than
    love
    dreams larger
    than life
    and does not
    understand the
    meaning of no.
    Because everything
    through her, and in her, is
    "Yes, it will be done."


    Why I love LSEs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Abbie
    A couple years ago I was put in charge of decorating the college for Valentine's Day. I made some gorgeous, fancy decorations from construction paper, glue, scissors, and imagination. Then I covered a couple cabinets with them. But my favorite was the diagram of a human heart I put up. So romantic!

  15. #95
    Darn Socks DirectorAbbie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Reuben View Post
    If you muffle my mouth with your hand and bind me up and tell me how much you love me... yea I suppose I'm mute.
    No, the point is to gag your own mouth. Then turn on some loud music. Then tell them everything.

    LSE
    1-6-2 so/sx
    Johari Nohari

    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

  16. #96
    Memory of Tomorrow Reuben's Avatar
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    Oh, so that's what you were doing last night at our party. So who's the lucky guy?
    She is wise
    beyond words
    beautiful within
    her soul
    brighter than
    the sun
    lovelier than
    love
    dreams larger
    than life
    and does not
    understand the
    meaning of no.
    Because everything
    through her, and in her, is
    "Yes, it will be done."


    Why I love LSEs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Abbie
    A couple years ago I was put in charge of decorating the college for Valentine's Day. I made some gorgeous, fancy decorations from construction paper, glue, scissors, and imagination. Then I covered a couple cabinets with them. But my favorite was the diagram of a human heart I put up. So romantic!

  17. #97
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    Okay, this is semi-related.

    I'm hearing a lot about Delta STs not liking to use pet names or say "I love you," or basically display affection in ways that aren't acts of service or quality time.
    This is very hard for me! From what I can tell, LSE boyfriend hates the verbal stuff too. And he's usually not a cuddler, whereas I am huge on cuddling. But here's the thing: we're in a long-distance relationship, so everything depends on verbal stuff. He calls me every day, but when I don't get an "I love you" or "I miss you" or SOMETHING, it's kind of depressing.

    Recommendations? Do I just need to get over it?
    EII/INFj

    OVE

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    My boyfriend says "I love you" to me at least 5 to 10 times a day; he's LSE. Even sometimes, when he's in bed with me, he'll turn around, half asleep and kiss me and tell me he loves me. He's very very affectionate with me, hugs and kisses; he'll cook for us and take out the garbage and do the laundry; he'll review next day plans with me and calls me SWEETIE. I call him HONEY.
    Last edited by Beautiful sky; 10-24-2011 at 02:03 AM.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

  19. #99
    Darn Socks DirectorAbbie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Diaphanous View Post
    Okay, this is semi-related.

    I'm hearing a lot about Delta STs not liking to use pet names or say "I love you," or basically display affection in ways that aren't acts of service or quality time.
    This is very hard for me! From what I can tell, LSE boyfriend hates the verbal stuff too. And he's usually not a cuddler, whereas I am huge on cuddling. But here's the thing: we're in a long-distance relationship, so everything depends on verbal stuff. He calls me every day, but when I don't get an "I love you" or "I miss you" or SOMETHING, it's kind of depressing.

    Recommendations? Do I just need to get over it?
    My mom is a Delta ST. I suspect she used a pet name because it's easier to say than my dad's real name.

    The pastor's wife is from the south and calls almost everyone "baby." I suppose it's easier than remembering everyone's names.

    If I were to use a pet name, it would need to fit. Like a nickname.

    I have my own notions as to why the phrase "I love you" is uncommon.

    LSE
    1-6-2 so/sx
    Johari Nohari

    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

  20. #100
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    Quote Originally Posted by CILi View Post
    Steamy.
    HI CILI WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!@#
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

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    Quote Originally Posted by octopuslove View Post
    One of my dance teachers is IEE and she finds it weird to hear people in supermarkets call their SOs "honey" and "darling" when she calls her husband "boofhead"...
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

  22. #102
    Decadent Charlatan Aquagraph's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by octopuslove View Post
    Diaphanous - try talking to him about it?
    Why do EII's have so much trouble figuring this out.

  23. #103
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    Quote Originally Posted by Diaphanous View Post
    Okay, this is semi-related.

    I'm hearing a lot about Delta STs not liking to use pet names or say "I love you," or basically display affection in ways that aren't acts of service or quality time.
    This is very hard for me! From what I can tell, LSE boyfriend hates the verbal stuff too. And he's usually not a cuddler, whereas I am huge on cuddling. But here's the thing: we're in a long-distance relationship, so everything depends on verbal stuff. He calls me every day, but when I don't get an "I love you" or "I miss you" or SOMETHING, it's kind of depressing.

    Recommendations? Do I just need to get over it?
    I totally understand you. You should talk to him and I'm sure he'll try to change but on the other hand you may feel he does it superficially then. The point is (theoretically and I'm much better in theory) to gain some self esteem I think. I have the same problem as you do, I feel great when we are together although I'm sometimes baffled because of his lack of expressivness (I think he's looking at me and thinking I'm ugly or sth). How long have you been together? When I'm with my boyfriend I'm constantly cuddling him or kissing and he doesn't mind. He just doesn't start it himself very often.

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    Using pet names is also weird to me. It sounds natural when alphas do it, to me it's just off. However, I don't mind calling somebody in some other way than their name but it's better when there's history attached to it .

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    I think my SLI husband calls me "sweetie" most often. He isn't an "I love you" guy, but he's a pet name guy. He has pet names for the kids too.
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
    -Mark Twain


    You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.

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    Everybody is different, especially within types, across time, and towards different people.
    She is wise
    beyond words
    beautiful within
    her soul
    brighter than
    the sun
    lovelier than
    love
    dreams larger
    than life
    and does not
    understand the
    meaning of no.
    Because everything
    through her, and in her, is
    "Yes, it will be done."


    Why I love LSEs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Abbie
    A couple years ago I was put in charge of decorating the college for Valentine's Day. I made some gorgeous, fancy decorations from construction paper, glue, scissors, and imagination. Then I covered a couple cabinets with them. But my favorite was the diagram of a human heart I put up. So romantic!

  27. #107
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    Quote Originally Posted by CILi View Post
    Lotsa work by day; lotsa work by night; and a little "Looking for [INSERT THREAD TITLE HERE]" in between.
    Work is good. Keeps you sane.

    Quote Originally Posted by CILi View Post
    Pretty excited to see you're still alive, honestly. I feared that whole "Jenna thing" got you perma-banned or something. ...Didn't feel good.
    LOL, you thought I was dead? You scare too easily.

    We should chat sometimes.
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

  28. #108
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    Quote Originally Posted by Reuben View Post
    Everybody is different, especially within types, across time, and towards different people.
    That's my point. "Delta STs don't use pet names"??? Some people of every type use pet names, and some people of every type don't use pet names.
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
    -Mark Twain


    You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.

  29. #109
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    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    The only thing that really creeps me out is hand holding. I hate it so much. It's so awkward. What if I have an itch, what if my hands are sweaty, what if he doesn't like me and doesn't want to hold hands, etc. I'm so clueless about knowing when to touch people or if they want to be touched..how do you gage it??? It's easier to just go in for the kill and grab his penis.
    Lmao. I have the same reservations.

    Man, I find it so awkward to be gay in public... I avoid it like the plague almost. There's this one time I almost ran over a group of people with my car because of it, but that's another story.

  30. #110
    Memory of Tomorrow Reuben's Avatar
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    Join the pack Lobo.

    We're hungry.
    She is wise
    beyond words
    beautiful within
    her soul
    brighter than
    the sun
    lovelier than
    love
    dreams larger
    than life
    and does not
    understand the
    meaning of no.
    Because everything
    through her, and in her, is
    "Yes, it will be done."


    Why I love LSEs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Abbie
    A couple years ago I was put in charge of decorating the college for Valentine's Day. I made some gorgeous, fancy decorations from construction paper, glue, scissors, and imagination. Then I covered a couple cabinets with them. But my favorite was the diagram of a human heart I put up. So romantic!

  31. #111
    Ti centric krieger's Avatar
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    for any feeling to be genuine one ought not to be ashamed to outwardly transmit it's expression.



    AM I WRONG?! AM I WRONG?!

  32. #112
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    transmit
    Please carefully reconsider your choice of words.
    She is wise
    beyond words
    beautiful within
    her soul
    brighter than
    the sun
    lovelier than
    love
    dreams larger
    than life
    and does not
    understand the
    meaning of no.
    Because everything
    through her, and in her, is
    "Yes, it will be done."


    Why I love LSEs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Abbie
    A couple years ago I was put in charge of decorating the college for Valentine's Day. I made some gorgeous, fancy decorations from construction paper, glue, scissors, and imagination. Then I covered a couple cabinets with them. But my favorite was the diagram of a human heart I put up. So romantic!

  33. #113
    Ti centric krieger's Avatar
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    why? less crypticism. go.

  34. #114
    Memory of Tomorrow Reuben's Avatar
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    It is commonly used to bridge 2 words together, that when seen in a triplet, gives shudders to males and females alike.
    She is wise
    beyond words
    beautiful within
    her soul
    brighter than
    the sun
    lovelier than
    love
    dreams larger
    than life
    and does not
    understand the
    meaning of no.
    Because everything
    through her, and in her, is
    "Yes, it will be done."


    Why I love LSEs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Abbie
    A couple years ago I was put in charge of decorating the college for Valentine's Day. I made some gorgeous, fancy decorations from construction paper, glue, scissors, and imagination. Then I covered a couple cabinets with them. But my favorite was the diagram of a human heart I put up. So romantic!

  35. #115
    Ti centric krieger's Avatar
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    you mean outside of a triplet. and i don't buy it that you can speak for the masses on this.

  36. #116
    Park's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by labocat View Post
    for any feeling to be genuine one ought not to be ashamed to outwardly transmit it's expression.
    This sentence doesn't make sense. A feeling doesn't become genuine...
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

  37. #117
    Ti centric krieger's Avatar
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    my sentence doesn't imply that. what are you talking about?

  38. #118
    Park's Avatar
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    Nothing, never mind.
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

  39. #119

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    My SLI called me babe once. It didn't go down too well with me. He calls me shithead a lot. I'm cool with that. Other people don't get it, and think he's insulting me, but I know it's code for "I love you so much, it hurts" That's how we roll.

  40. #120
    I had words here once, but I didn't feed them Khola aka Bee's Avatar
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    Loud and open, but please no sex on the dancefloor. Make it within reason, we don't want to horrify the masses either.
    Hello, my name is Bee. Pleased to meet you .



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