Quote Originally Posted by Megan
I thought i would ask you all about this. The following e-mail is from a very good friend of mine... a very very ESFj medical student(despite the endless use of exclamation marks she is not an ESFp ) sent after a major exam for her. We constantly talk about her time issues and I make some suggestions but I do not think they help unfortunately. At first I thought it was a simple time mgt problem which could easily be solved but now I do not know, I am thinking it might be socionics related but maybe not. Perhaps INTjs and other types would know how to deal with this? I really want to help her get over this but so far i can think of nothing that works for her. The email is in her own words, but english is her second language, the parts in brown are my only additions. I got her permission to use it here for a while because it provides an example of how the problem usually manifests, I seriously want to know what you guys think because this problem is really bothering her:



Hi Xxxxx(me),
I'm so so so so upset that I did not manage my time properly at the exam and did not answer question4 at all!!! I should have done Questions1,3,4 and then 2!I'm so so so stupid. The Q4 was straightforward and the easiest one! I knew the answer and I failed to manage my time! As usual!!!! Perhaps I never learn! I'm such an idiot! I lost 25 points just because of my stupidity[we had previously discussed the strategy of anwering the more time consuming and valuable in terms of points questions before the simplier ones].
You know, even at work [she is a part time beauty therapist] i always run late with my clients unless I don't put my clock forward=> only then do I have time to prepare the bed and tidy up before the next client arrives! Also after i have finished my work most of the other therapists are gone and I am still in the room and tidying up! Why?!!!!
Wonder if I have some disorder being always late?! Do you think that I can still learn if I didn't learn for 23years? I told you that I'm lacking intelligence! At the exam I knew I was running out of time but i kind of already gave up on anwering question4. I even said to few people before the exam that I doubt I will have time to answer the questions! You see?! i already knew before the exam had started! Therefore i did not even try! I think i'll go and shoot myself in the head! I'm sorry to bother you with all this! but I really don't know what to do about it! Shall i get a gun? ha ha? Xxxxx, have a good day. I am going to get out now!
Are these issues related to at all? Can an polr be at least managed if it cannot be fixed?
This is related to , but not in the sense that dominant = always on time, as you and Joy also indicated. It has to do with her giving priority to what she is immediately dealing with in - - over the longer-term implications - . That is the reason for (for instance) ESFjs being late, but as a rule PoLR people wouldn't describe themselves as "having time management problems" - they would either not address the issue at all (and become one of the always-late ESFjs, but not address the issue) or they would have created a system to compensate for that - the stereotypical ESXj who needs a schedule or time-plan for everything.


Quote Originally Posted by Joy
he's told me that he wants to be done with something by a certain time but then we end up leaving half an hour late because he stood around talking with people when there wasn't time to chat.
That's what I meant with giving priority to over .

Quote Originally Posted by Joy
When we work together jobs seem to take longer than they do when he does it himself, but it's because he talks so much. If this were not the case, we'd get done much more quickly than when he works by himself. He doesn't seem to understand what's happening
Precisely.

And because Megan's friend does seem to realize what is happening, and is worried about improving on it and does see it as a problem, to me it seems like it's more a role than PoLR (ISFp then).

Now I don't want to get into the discussion on her type -- I'm just saying that she seems to handle more as a role function than as PoLR; or perhaps in super-id, as hidden-agenda or dual-seeking; which would suggest she'd be ISFj or ESFp.

If she is indeed ESFj, then strong ethical subtype -- she also seems to be in taciturn-negativist mode in that mail.