Quote Originally Posted by Minde View Post
What parts sound like you, if you don't mind me asking?
Quote Originally Posted by Minde View Post
- Considers himself a shy person, particularly with women. When I asked why he wasn't afraid to talk to me he said, "I already know you." He says he's worked to overcome the shyness. He does seem to be relatively quiet, not a show off, particularly with people he doesn't know.

Yeah.

- Clear but gentle in expressing interest toward people he's attracted to; persistent but doesn't just barrel through boundaries. Comfort of the other person seems paramount.

For the most part.

- Cognizant of how other people are feeling, particularly physically

Yes, when I pay attention.

- Knows how to make people feel better, or feel different (good) things. This can be directly physical, but also indirectly. For example, he figured out that people crowding me makes me uncomfortable (sensory overload, though I'm not sure if he's figured that part out - I'm not sure that occurs to him...). So when there's a crowd he's started "making me a bubble" using his own body as a shield, plus sort of using body cues to move me out of someone's way or into a more open spot.

Sounds like something I'd do. Even though I'd usually ask(/talk about it) to confirm my observations.

- Is attracted to femininity - long hair, for example.

Sure.

- Is essentially a secular humanist, but has openness to "spirituality." It seems he associates spirituality with certain feelings; he doesn't seem adept at understanding or conversing in these things, but he says he's trying to be open, especially recently.

Pretty much.

- Laughs at people a bit behind their backs, or comments on them. Usually not too cruelly, but more than I do, for sure. I found myself defending them occasionally. Things that seem to snag his attention are silly things they say, being overweight/out-of-shape, other aesthetic failings e.g. being smelly (the smelly people really got to him for some reason...).

I do this, too.
And a few things from the opening post. But I'm too tired to pick them out right now.

Fwiw, the things I don't relate to are the love for sports, cleaning, and dancing.

Quote Originally Posted by Minde View Post
One reason I'm still torn on the Fe-Te divide is that he's "softer" in interactions than I expect Te's to be. This may be something that changes over time, as veneers wear off. But so far I haven't seen him be as caustic as I've seen most self-typed Te's on here, like yourself, Absurd, Expat, Smilex, FDG...
I don't know. I've been called things like warm/soft/etc lately, though I think my caustic side is still there when I need it.

Quote Originally Posted by Minde View Post
He occasionally (almost compulsively at times) gives advice on better ways to do things, or even just to do things. Particularly when I'm driving... Now, I'm a pretty good driver if I do say so myself, but I've always felt it a little weird to have people watching me while I do it, or when I'm eating, too. Actually, anything where I have to handle objects moving around, be it my own body or basketballs... Anyway, he'll quietly say things like, "Woah, stop," if something jumps out in front of me and I act like I don't see it. Or after he saw me parallel park he gave me an impromptu tutorial on the simplest way to remember how to do it right the first time. (What's kind of funny, though, is that in the times where I've seen him parallel park, I've actually ended up doing a better job - probably because I'm a bit of a perfectionist, but still. It amused me a tiny bit.)

An interesting thing about all that, though, is that somehow I didn't end up offended at the instructions. Or even all that uncomfortable, which is really unusual, considering my dislike of being observed like that.


He has complained to me once about how some people are overly dependent on him, and how it gets annoying at times. I proffered the platitude that starts "Give a man a fish..." and he said, "I have taught them to fish; they still keep coming back. "
Add a few more points to Si creative.