I have been humiliated and humiliated others in turn. What is your take on humiliation? I've experienced humiliation with alphas, betas, gammas, deltas - there is no exception in my experience. Any understanding of humiliation?
What is your take on humiliation?
I have been humiliated and humiliated others in turn. What is your take on humiliation? I've experienced humiliation with alphas, betas, gammas, deltas - there is no exception in my experience. Any understanding of humiliation?
It's universal.Originally Posted by chip
Its humiliating.
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I'd suppose you're humiliated if your pride has been hurt. And if you humiliate others in return then it's as if your hurt pride has been restored. You might be easily humiliated if you have... low/vulnerable self-esteem.
I think its better to let reality humiliate people rather than be a willful thing.
By this I mean that its better to let people know that their pride is excessive by letting them mess up on their own and realize they aren't as awesome as they thought, rather than to hunt down someone you feel is awesome and too happy about it and then try to knock them down.
Sometimes it seems like people are trying very hard to be patronizing (which is humiliating in a way) when its not necessary. This is what annoys me, like one time I was ordering food at a fast food place and the person asks "For here or to go" and interrupts me mid-sentence while I was giving my order. Being interrupted, I could not finish my thought and had to take a second to pay attention to her question and register it, she only gave me 2 seconds and then asked again, which annoyed me, so I sighed in an annoyed fashion, which led her to then explain "what I am basically asking is do you want to eat the food inside here or take it with you outside".... which I responded to her "I know what for here or to go means".... which prompted the manager to take over the order because I'm guessing he thought .... I.... was being difficult. Regardless I can't stand that patronizing bullshit, interrupting people midsentence and treating them like they are mentally retarded (who the fuck doesn't know what for here or to go means???). Anyways patronizing stuff like that annoys me, where people treat you like your dumber than you are.... I was about to be like "bitch I can do quantum mechanics.... I think I can fucking order a hamburger if you shut your mouth"...... but of course she would have started to snap her fingers like trailer trash and be like "uh uhhhh.... I don't care if you know quantum... wut..evar.... I juz wanna order yo hamburger, watsda matta, you dun know what fur here or to go means ?" and everything, god fuck people like that. Then I try to explain to people how she is the one being difficult as its a much bigger problem to interrupt people midsentence and patronize them and creates a worse experience on both ends than having a 2 second delay when answering questions, which then culminates in people getting pissed at me because they are being emotional and not rational about the situation and see some asshole guy getting pissed off at a poor innocent little girl thats working behind a fast food counter. Sometimes I even try to keep myself in check by reminding myself of that like "oh maybe I'm being an asshole here, maybe its just a miscommunication"..... (hypothetical beyond this point) but then I'll come up to order the next time and she will be like laughing at me and like "hahahha you know what for here or to go means now! hahahah I can't believe you didn't know that" and then her bf comes up looking like a d-bag and comes up to me with a bunch of bravado and is like "hey dude bro, you fucking tarded, who doesn't know what for here or to go means?"..... my eyes narrow together and an apathetic annoyed gaze takes over and I say "I knew what for here or to go means, I believe I was thinking".... and then the dude goes crazy like a frat boy that had to much to drink, yelling loudly and swirling his head around saying "OHHH YEAA OBVIOUSLY NOTTT ******T, YOU CANT ORDER, YOU CANT ORDER OHHHHHHHHH!!!!"..... and I'll be like "whatever, fucking douche bag"....... and then I'll walk off and watch him and her kiss and be thinking to myself "What the hell???" so obviously its not really like every girl you see is an innocent sweet little flower.... they can also be slutty dumb whores that are in league with dude bros.
Last edited by male; 12-15-2010 at 10:24 PM.
lol. i dont blame you for being pissed because it would be insulting to have something like that explained to you like you didnt know. but reading this reminded me of when i used to work fast food and i absolutely hated doing register because it basically consisted of having to be nice to a continuous flow of patronizing jerks. people assume that if you work fast food you must be stupid. and i think that it actually is quite socially acceptable to act like an ass towards fast food employees (or service workers in general), or at least more than it should be.
my defense was to put up a front of not caring and, when i was feeling especially humiliated that day, to be kind of pre-emptively rude and condescending. not that this is justified or the right thing to do. what i'm trying to say is that its extremely unlikely that girl was trying to attack you personally...i'm sure she just had her own issues.
bringing this around to the OP...people often humiliate others because they have their own issues. /genius revelation
Yea the thing she didn't realize though is I have worked two jobs before in my lifetime, one for a summer, and one for an entire year where it was my job to take orders for other people. One was at a food court during the summer and one was at a resteraunt to-go carside. I have shared the same experiences, the same annoying customers, and make a conscious decision to do two things in my life... 1) to have a greater respect and understanding for the guy/girl who is working jobs like this and 2) to become very proficient at the order taking process. One time I even got complimented as stupid as it sounds on being very easy to take an order from by someone. So it makes it all that more patronizing when she decides to be condescending to probably the one person that would have been helpful and not condescending to her. Unfortunately some people become so possessed in that kind of authoritative condescending attitude that even attempting to explain this to them calmly to them just becomes another element in their little sick game to condescend you. Its really easy not to be an asshole when people make that possible, but sometimes I believe that people act in ways that bring it on themselves and then play the victim because in some sick way they need to feel some sense of being the victim because it relates to other issues. I mean what is that thing.... were people poison their children and take care of them... or they constantly claim to be sick and go to the hospital. It feels good to be the victim and leech off of people.
A lot of times this translates into people working because they feel like customers are going to be rude to them, so they try to be pre-emptively rude back and get a leg up on them or a one up and show them their place, thinking that submissive customers can't hurt them. Sometimes I'll notice it and flip the table back on them thinking "I don't fucking deserve to be treated like this".... and then they will run away and play victim and I'll be left to receive the blame. I'll try to explain my way out of it and then its like "your trying to justify yourself" or "how do sleep at night" and so forth. It just seems like playing a sociopaths game.
Some like it when it's hawt.
"The feeling of humiliation is nothing but the feeling of being an object."
- Raoul Vaneigem
I've never understood the appeal in humiliation fantasies... it's like fantasizing about being treated like dirt, not even human (and I just don't get it)... I'm not sure if I'm scared about the prospect of being humiliated, but the prospect of humiliating others is kind of horrifying to me and the thought of it revolts me (strongly).
Humiliation is a big turn-on. I don't get off on being humiliated myself though.
The Barnum or Forer effect is the tendency for people to judge that general, universally valid statements about personality are actually specific descriptions of their own personalities. A "universally valid" statement is one that is true of everyone—or, more likely, nearly everyone. It is not known why people tend to make such misjudgments, but the effect has been experimentally reproduced.
The psychologist Paul Meehl named this fallacy "the P.T. Barnum effect" because Barnum built his circus and dime museum on the principle of having something for everyone. It is also called "the Forer effect" after its discoverer, the psychologist Bertram R. Forer, who modestly dubbed it "the fallacy of personal validation".
This was bullshit. I don't know why I like to get humiliated. I feel like I have a lot of deep shame about my sexuality and sexual desires so the feeling of being humiliated and sexual desire are tied.
I remember when I was a kid I would masturbate to porn and had sexual fantasies that made me feel extreme guilt. I felt like how could I be a normal person after you realize you like that.
I also had feelings for other boys my age which made things more complicated, because I had really deep shame about that. I still kind of feel ashamed of it and I wish it was something I didn't have to deal with it.
Someone forcing me to be humiliated and being dominant over me makes me feel accepted and loved. I don't know if it's healthy.
The Barnum or Forer effect is the tendency for people to judge that general, universally valid statements about personality are actually specific descriptions of their own personalities. A "universally valid" statement is one that is true of everyone—or, more likely, nearly everyone. It is not known why people tend to make such misjudgments, but the effect has been experimentally reproduced.
The psychologist Paul Meehl named this fallacy "the P.T. Barnum effect" because Barnum built his circus and dime museum on the principle of having something for everyone. It is also called "the Forer effect" after its discoverer, the psychologist Bertram R. Forer, who modestly dubbed it "the fallacy of personal validation".
pointless. toxic, sadistic, u could hummiliate someone as a way to criticize in a funny way, without the antisocial conotations.
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