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Thread: Do SLEs get bored with IEIs? (INFp-ESTp)

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    Default Do SLEs get bored with IEIs? (INFp-ESTp)

    I am an IEI, and even though I don't consider myself a boring person over all -- far from it -- I cannot help but to wonder if SLEs will find me boring. They are so exciting and always on the move. Do SLEs get bored with their less energetic and less exciting dual the IEI? Especially romantically like if SLE is all about party party lifestyle and IEI is not as much that way

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    They don't get bored at all, the IEI is their dual and therefor most attuned to keep the attention of the SLE.

    Don't try to reason how a relationship works out by simple comparing two types:

    "SLE party guy and IEI idealist, that can't work out" is a simple reasoning but in reality socionics goes at work, and their information exchange energizes them both.


    Romantically duality works great if there are two more conditions present:
    minimum physical attraction
    same life goals at that moment

    So if the SLE only wants to party, and the IEI only want to write poems, they haven't got the same life goals. If they are truly looking for a partner, it would most likely work out very well.

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    Y'know, most people are pretty boring really. If you're at least thinking about being boring. Then you're less likely to keep being boring, and to spice things up and keep them alive.

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    Nope! They don't get bored. I've never been in a relationship with an SLE (sadly), but from what I can tell IEIs are odd enough that we don't get boring, even to SLEs. Think about it this way: an SLE usually has little difficulty in achieving goals in the external world. In an IEI he/she encounters an inner world both intriguing and not so easily conquered. IEIs can be like really good poems: you never quite get to the bottom of us.

    In IEI-SLE duality, I think both partners enjoy taking one another into their "worlds". The SLE likes taking the IEI into the "real world" because the IEI is a compliant assistant, can be helpful in dealing with interpersonal issues, and just because the IEI really appreciates the SLE's Se, and everybody likes to feel appreciated. Similarly, the IEI likes taking the SLE into imagination land because the SLE can help organize things with Ti (one's 2nd function is often helpful to one's dual for providing practical assistance in an area which is generally in the dual's "domain"), and because the SLE enjoys it.

    Now, of course, if you've got an SLE that wants to be president of the united states, and an IEI that wants to sit at home in Cleveland and not have to go on countless publicity tours, well, they probably shouldn't start a romantic relationship, and if they do, there will probably be conflict. But, if their life goals are reasonably attuned (and there is some physical attraction), the relationship has a better chance than most other (non-dual) relationships.
    Not a rule, just a trend.

    IEI. Probably Fe subtype. Pretty sure I'm E4, sexual instinctual type, fairly confident that I'm a 3 wing now, so: IEI-Fe E4w3 sx/so. Considering 3w4 now, but pretty sure that 4 fits the best.

    Yes 'a ma'am that's pretty music...

    I am grateful for the mystery of the soul, because without it, there could be no contemplation, except of the mysteries of divinity, which are far more dangerous to get wrong.

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    SLEs aren't really party heavy IMO. They specifically go to parties to make fun of people they don't like, which the IEI admires.

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    All SLEs are rapists and all IEIs enjoy being raped.

    You do the math.

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    Quote Originally Posted by AngelMaybe View Post
    I am an IEI, and even though I don't consider myself a boring person over all -- far from it -- I cannot help but to wonder if SLEs will find me boring. They are so exciting and always on the move. Do SLEs get bored with their less energetic and less exciting dual the IEI? Especially romantically like if SLE is all about party party lifestyle and IEI is not as much that way
    No, and IEI's shouldn't feel like it's their job to entertain SLE's. Just relax and have fun.
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy View Post
    No, and IEI's shouldn't feel like it's their job to entertain SLE's. Just relax and have fun.
    you're so condescending

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    I do my best.
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    SLEs aren't really party heavy IMO.
    it depends how you measure this.

    by comparing to your criteria of 'party heavy' or by comparing them with other types.

    method 2 is the better one, and they likely score in the top 3 when it comes to party type. (if not please tell which score higher)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy View Post
    I do my best.
    well it's not good enough. you're going to have to try a little harder.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    it depends how you measure this.

    by comparing to your criteria of 'party heavy' or by comparing them with other types.

    method 2 is the better one, and they likely score in the top 3 when it comes to party type. (if not please tell which score higher)
    SEE, ESFJ, ENFJ.

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    Quote Originally Posted by mercutio View Post
    SEE, ESFJ, ENFJ.
    I would say SEE, ESE and SLE.

    SLE>EIE, imo. But it probably depends.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    I would say SEE, ESE and SLE.

    SLE>EIE, imo. But it probably depends.
    EIEs are more dramatic and more social.

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    Quote Originally Posted by AngelMaybe View Post
    I am an IEI, and even though I don't consider myself a boring person over all -- far from it -- I cannot help but to wonder if SLEs will find me boring. They are so exciting and always on the move. Do SLEs get bored with their less energetic and less exciting dual the IEI? Especially romantically like if SLE is all about party party lifestyle and IEI is not as much that way
    When people first get into a relationship, unless they know about Socionics, they are not going to look at the common bond that unites them, they look for superficial stuff...looks, etc...reality is two sides of the whole are different in a likeable way...that means if a pair is experiencing something that makes them distant and uninvolved, like depression, or anything else, they will likely not be fully involved in the connection and the other person will lose interest because of lack of "interest"; knowing about Socionics, and the reality of the pairs, the likelyness of people staying in it and working at it is greater...so that's how I would see it working in reality. Dual pairs meeting is often a chance a luck because at first, each pair is likely to be attracted to identical, mirror or activity because these types display in an outwardly "attitude" likeable qualities that a person looks for...remember one person- the Introvert of the dual supressess their self, their true self and only after much exposure and confidence to duals and obviously dualization do they know what attitudes to display to attract their dual and that's not such an easy process.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 2w1sw(1w9) helps others to live up to their own standards of what a good person is and is very behind the scenes in the process.
    Tritype 1-2-6 stacking sp/sx


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Quote Originally Posted by mercutio View Post
    EIEs are more dramatic and more social.
    Also more pensive, physically disconnected, and intolerant of close quarters.

    I'm not really a party person in that I rarely go to parties, but when I do I generally go all out.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly View Post
    Also more pensive, physically disconnected, and intolerant of close quarters.
    I agree with this.
    EIE tritype 5w4, 4w5, 9w1


    As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being.
    Carl Jung, "Memories, Dreams, Reflections", 1962

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    Quote Originally Posted by Starfall View Post
    No, and stop worrying about people finding you boring. Besides, our retarded clumsy assess are much too amusing for them to ever really get bored with.
    I spilled someone else's coffee two weeks in a row at the church social hour. and then last night I opened a can of soda which fizzed out all over me and onto the floor. this sort of thing happens to me all the time. But when it happens in public you can use it to your advantage and strike up a conversation with the person and apologize charmingly and then everyone loves you despite the fact that you're a walking disaster.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    I spilled someone else's coffee two weeks in a row at the church social hour. and then last night I opened a can of soda which fizzed out all over me and onto the floor. this sort of thing happens to me all the time. But when it happens in public you can use it to your advantage and strike up a conversation with the person and apologize charmingly and then everyone loves you despite the fact that you're a walking disaster.
    I used to find "making mistakes" could help ease up the beginning of social interactions. It's like when you make a mistake and don't freak out over it, it can set a mood that it's okay for minor things to go wrong.

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    Quote Originally Posted by AngelMaybe View Post
    I am an IEI, and even though I don't consider myself a boring person over all -- far from it -- I cannot help but to wonder if SLEs will find me boring. They are so exciting and always on the move. Do SLEs get bored with their less energetic and less exciting dual the IEI? Especially romantically like if SLE is all about party party lifestyle and IEI is not as much that way
    This is a too simplistic picture of an SLE. I for one am not "so exciting and always on the move". I certainly do not want to party Also, I'm surprisingly lazy, as are a lot of other SLEs. All you need to do is ask IEIs on here and normally about everyday life around the SLEs they know, and check past threads for examples of experiences of SLEs, and these myths will quickly be dispelled.

    If some SLE likes you, they like you. Don't worry about being seen as too boring.

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    Thanks for the responses, everyone -- I am very happy to hear that SLEs love our clumsy, oh so loveable NiFe selves for what we are. There is an SLE guy I know who seems at times out of reach, and even though he pursues me I have wondered if he'll get bored but maybe not :wink: I guess we'll see!

    Quote Originally Posted by Ezra View Post
    This is a too simplistic picture of an SLE. I for one am not "so exciting and always on the move". I certainly do not want to party Also, I'm surprisingly lazy, as are a lot of other SLEs. All you need to do is ask IEIs on here and normally about everyday life around the SLEs they know, and check past threads for examples of experiences of SLEs, and these myths will quickly be dispelled.

    If some SLE likes you, they like you. Don't worry about being seen as too boring.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ezra View Post
    This is a too simplistic picture of an SLE. I for one am not "so exciting and always on the move". I certainly do not want to party Also, I'm surprisingly lazy, as are a lot of other SLEs. All you need to do is ask IEIs on here and normally about everyday life around the SLEs they know, and check past threads for examples of experiences of SLEs, and these myths will quickly be dispelled.
    exactly. I love that sort of lazy, hedonistic enjoyment of life that you SLEs have. the ability to relax and fall into the vortex of NiFe.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Given how unpredictable IEIs are, I doubt SLEs would ever get bored.

    Just imagine this...When an IEI senses that SLE is losing interest in them, the IEI with victim romance style will start feeling insecure and start withdrawing from SLE and go completely cold on the SLE, hence subconsciously playing a game of push-pull. This push-pull game would then trigger SLE's conquering mode, and the SLE would start to go all their way out to woo the IEI all over again, hence reassuring IEIs that their interest in them is constant and haven't wavered.

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    Quote Originally Posted by AngelMaybe View Post
    I am an IEI, and even though I don't consider myself a boring person over all -- far from it -- I cannot help but to wonder if SLEs will find me boring. They are so exciting and always on the move. Do SLEs get bored with their less energetic and less exciting dual the IEI? Especially romantically like if SLE is all about party party lifestyle and IEI is not as much that way
    I think you're thinking too much.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Hermit Soul View Post
    Given how unpredictable IEIs are, I doubt SLEs would ever get bored.

    Just imagine this...When an IEI senses that SLE is losing interest in them, the IEI with victim romance style will start feeling insecure and start withdrawing from SLE and go completely cold on the SLE, hence subconsciously playing a game of push-pull. This push-pull game would then trigger SLE's conquering mode, and the SLE would start to go all their way out to woo the IEI all over again, hence reassuring IEIs that their interest in them is constant and haven't wavered.
    This. Yes.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Hermit Soul View Post
    Given how unpredictable IEIs are, I doubt SLEs would ever get bored.

    Just imagine this...When an IEI senses that SLE is losing interest in them, the IEI with victim romance style will start feeling insecure and start withdrawing from SLE and go completely cold on the SLE, hence subconsciously playing a game of push-pull. This push-pull game would then trigger SLE's conquering mode, and the SLE would start to go all their way out to woo the IEI all over again, hence reassuring IEIs that their interest in them is constant and haven't wavered.
    Quote Originally Posted by sbbds View Post
    This. Yes.
    ^
    "Talent hits a target no one else can hit; genius hits a target no one else can see." - Schopenhauer

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    Quote Originally Posted by AngelMaybe View Post
    Do SLEs get bored with their less energetic and less exciting dual the IEI? Especially romantically like if SLE is all about party party lifestyle and IEI is not as much that way
    in general, people of opposite clubs are not boring. too much of the difference
    nontypes factors with a concrete dual may reduce positive effects of IR
    Types examples: video bloggers, actors

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    In general, couples get bored but this doesn't mean relationships are over; they're likely shifting into domestication mode, where each is responsible for one's own happiness. Your question points to insecurity about not having an ability to keep someone else entertained - that's really putting a lot on one's plate. However, I've noted that IEIs can get far more discontented with their relationships; often they demand more from their partners while simultaneously not wanting to be smothered - to be given a lot of alone time. SLEs are usually excellent at creating their own excitement and certainly won't need someone else to do it for them.

    a.k.a. I/O

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    i never get bored of me so i sure would hope not

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