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No Delta believes Gulanzon is Delta. He's Alpha and everyone can see that shit as clear as day.
But he is lovable.
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Wow. I guess that is creepy though because it was an "admirer." I think any big show of affection from someone you barely know is sorta scary. Now, if he'd, I dunno, planted 20,000 roses (or rose bushes I guess) in her backyard or something because he knew she loved them after they'd been dating for a while, that would be cool.
But buckets of wholesale roses from someone you barely know??!! creepy!!! very creepy.
But the girl was a drama student so was probably attracting situations like this. jk
Hi! I'm an ENFP. :-)
As a Delta, if someone proposed to me that way (hay bales), I'd either get annoyed by the drama of it, or scared off, and say no.
Same with 20k roses. Scary. Edit: Also, what a waste of money.
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.-Mark Twain
You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.
Hmm, interesting. Where would you draw the line between quirky and personalized and needlessly big and dramatic? Or perhaps it's like Infantile-Infantile repulsion. I don't mind being cruel strange and unusual, but I can't really imagine taking being on the receiving end so well, myself.
EDIT
And I think the 20k roses just couldn't possibly be construed as "unique". They're cliche... more doesn't make it special.
Now, 20k pizzas? That's a different story.
MORE EDIT
And yes, waste of money. I can think of more creative (and less expensive) things to do with, say, a humble telephone call. Or a loudspeaker. Or a bucket and some sort of permanent marker.
Depends on what the vibrant display of insanity is for, though. I'll stop before I totally lose track of the topic.
FINAL THOUGHT
Mixed amusement/confusion, good. Laughter, even better.
on the more serious side, this quote defines love, to me, very well. dunno if it's alpha or not but it's true for me.
Then said Almitra, "Speak to us of Love."
And he raised his head and looked upon the people, and there fell a stillness upon them. And with a great voice he said:
When love beckons to you follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
And when he speaks to you believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden.
For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.
Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,
So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.
Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself.
He threshes you to make you naked.
He sifts you to free you from your husks.
He grinds you to whiteness.
He kneads you until you are pliant;
And then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God's sacred feast.
All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart, and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life's heart.
But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure,
Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing-floor,
Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love.
When you love you should not say, "God is in my heart," but rather, I am in the heart of God."
And think not you can direct the course of love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
Love has no other desire but to fulfil itself.
But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires:
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude;
And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.
ILE
those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often
Really? but what if you were a cowgirl or something or the bales of hay were some sort of inside joke or some moment your shared? Or let's say you stayed in some farm type of bed and breakfast (not sure if those exist) and you made some comment about all the hay bales outside and were laughing about it and the next morning he says to look at the hay bales and then you see it! I think it could be cute.
It seems like something an ISTp would be more likely to do (hay bales that is), versus a big dramatic speech with a lot of emotion and John Mayer songs playing in the background or something -- that's the kinda drama that would make me cringe.
Hi! I'm an ENFP. :-)
I guess I'd just prefer, in private, being asked. But I imagine it's a personal thing and not entirely type related.
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.-Mark Twain
You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.
I like Krig's post.
The word "love" and the concept of "being in love" is often used in a biased & subjective way (talk to your friends and family about it and you'll see they will mostly give only one "true" interpretation, often not that well thought out).
It would be correct to say that there are various forms of attraction and connection, therefore giving 'love' one definition or interpretation is limiting and deceitful. xD
I am digging up a really old thread! I love going through this forum and igniting old threads!
So, what is alpha love? I think love can be different for everyone. I think ILE's, LII's, ESE's, and SEI's may see love differently. I like to think there is an underlying theme to all of our views on love. That is, if all of you wonderful alpha's wish to share You can be silly but, I am going to be a bit serious on my view of 'love'.
To me, love has always been a choice. It is something that I choose over and over again. I don't like the thought that love is not something you choose. That no matter what, you must love someone. I have always hated the idea of that because you must love them out of obligation because of that relation. I hate the saying that blood is thicker then water. To me, it is not. The blood of the covenant is thicker then the water of the womb. I get disgusted when people pull that relational card on me. I hate it the most when my family does it because I don't believe in that kind of love.
If I love someone, I choose them. The person I love is always free to go. I never want anyone to stay out of obligation. If I choose someone, I choose them fully. I am choosing the good, the bad, and the ugly. I am aware and with this freedom I choose them. They have to be a good person who tries at least but, I do choose them. It will never be out of obligation. I choose my family, even the ones with blood relations. I still decide that choice. I am someone who highly values their sense of self and freedom above all. However, I am never above making the choice to sacrifice for the one's I love. I choose them. I will never kill myself out of obligation to a loved one. I will choose to kill parts of myself if I have to for them, but that choice is my responsibility. Love, to me, is the freedom of choice. It is not an obligation of relations.
Everyday I choose my loved one's. Even when they hurt me or when I am scared, or I don't want to do something for them. I still choose to do that because I choose them. There may come a day when I must stop choosing them. If I know the person can let me go even if they don't want, I know that love was genuine. Especially if they show back up in my life with no strings attached and want to rebuild out of an evolved character. "I will fight for you, but if you wish to be free, I will let you go. I hope I can mend what we had but, that choice is up to you". I can't believe someone loved me if they pulled the obligation card on me. "You are family! You have an obligation!". I can't trust or believe that.
I think there is something beautiful with choice in regards to love. It comes with no strings and it is genuine. I want to look at my decade old relations and knowing I still choose them everyday. Even if it hurts or is rough, it is a sacrifice worth making and it was done freely. It was worth it. Even with the one's that may end. I know that I choose them to the end. I can sleep easy knowing that.
Obligation. A sense that to remain in good conscience you have to prioritize the needs and desires of someone else over your own.
Re. @Pinocchio ‘s question, I don’t like it. If I were the one being proposed to I’d just prefer a direct question. I don’t really want to make things like that a public affair, or for situations to arise where one party feels obligated against their wishes to say “yes.”
Despite the positive description of obligation, I have always viewed it negatively. It feels like a way to weaponize people into doing stuff for others in a morally superior way and I really don't like that. It feels like a dirty and binding contract to me. I would rather say and have a responsibility to my loved one's then an obligation. That's just my opinion of it.
For me it's complicated. There is stuff about people that I can love and admire but I don't think I've ever loved the entirety of the person yet. I've had teenage girl-y crushes on people but I would hardly say that was 'love' - as I was always aware of the own ridiculousness of it myself. As my eyes were always on the negative unloving or clash-y side to as well... otherwise it seems too naive. ESE probably loves people more purely than I really do. Part of it is I have a hard time trusting Fi and valuing or even liking it that much.
Infatuation gets a bad rap. It's underrated and people chastise others for 'being infatuated' act like they are above infatuation when that was never the case so it's hypocritical and dumb to me to criticize others for it - as long as they accept it for what it is. I realize it's not as ideal or wholesome as 'love' but as long as you realize it's infatuation and don't confuse the two I think that's okay. The problem with some other IEIs I've noticed is how they will sadly and 'Oh honey' ishly (like the cool black demon saying it to Becky Rosen on Supernatural haha) confuse or idealize or make-believe Infatuation as being 'in love' and that is where the shit hits the fan and all sorts of real problems begin to start.
Infatuation can be a playful form of love if both people respect each other but often times it's one sided with a naive nerd being infatuated with the cool jock and the cool jock is just laughing at the nerd's weaknesses and exploiting them all the way to the bank.
It feels like a dirty and binding contract to me. I would rather say and have a responsibility to my loved one's then an obligation. That's just my opinion of it.
Yeah this reminds me of Fifty Shades of Gray. I never read the book much but IIRC didn't the dom top guy make her sign papers saying she was okay with all of this and she did lol. I don't think just because you can effectively manipulate the court systems with bullshit Te documents that makes what you are doing is okay ((and vice-versa- I wouldn't say it's intrinsically immoral without the documents) - but yeah just a clever narcisisstic way to protect your own ass. Other non Te valuers I think criticized the book. Chelsea Handler didn't like it either and I think she's my dual (SLE).
I meant an internal obligation, obviously. Love tends to come about when someone makes you happy — even unintentionally, they’ve done something for you, and now you can’t in good conscience abandon them if they need something. Or if you don’t know someone, but they’re in distress and have no one else to help them, that can spur on a feeling of love; again, you don’t feel you can just leave them to their fate.
Mystics talk about achieving a state of love for everyone. That goes hand-in-hand with extreme humility, which is why most people never achieve such a state. What it means is feeling obliged to prioritize every other person above yourself.
That kind of “contract” is characteristic of Te bases, yeah. Inability to understand anything except through an external form. An obligation can only be understood by a contract. Lol.
I meant an internal obligation, obviously.
It wasn't that obvious sorry. Hmm... I have difficulty with internal obligation as well because of go-with-the-flow Ixxp energy lol. I can make some plans and try to follow it but I think I do much better with spontaneity. And it is hard for me to like anything deep enough to really be obligated to it that way anyway. I don't always like this about myself though. And yeah I agree- the classical form of romance and love is about being rescued like that. Especially for victims and infantiles lol =p I'm not so sure if I feel "obligated" to a person after I feel 'rescued' & my Victimy-ness is protected - but I do have a genuine desire to help them out some way if I can? They relieved my suffering so I want to relieve theirs.
Mystics talk about achieving a state of love for everyone. That goes hand-in-hand with extreme humility, which is why most people never achieve such a state. What it means is feeling obliged to prioritize every other person above yourself.
This is like the realm of non-ego Oneness and what the real relationship with Jesus Christ is about. Not many people understand this non-ego form of Jesus as they project their own crap into what spiritual awakening is all about and thus pollute it. But realistically I think people always have favorites and preferences because that is how the 'real world' operates- one of duality, sinfulness and separation instead of inclusion etc. The Te/Fi business world primarily operates on this kind of thing of course. If you are favored you are promoted even with lesser technical skills because it is all mostly based on Fi likability and little else.
It is kind of ironic that Fi gets attached to morality and Christianity so much when in reality it is often the type of thing that far removes a person from what Christ was about. Of course Fe isn't necessarily more righteous either but I am naturally biased with my liking of Fe lol.
Love fires a channel of faith and awareness of planetary frequencies and galactic resonance with fiction and extravagant threads of fate and oasis hearts of value and sweet memories embodying the camera of quiet sound and a picture of heaven flying away on the chariot of the Gods.
ORRE COLOSSEUM JUST GOT STARTED, AND KOBE IS REIGNING AS KING!!
It's Henry vs Zidane, France vs Spain in the 2024 Olympic soccer final, Egypt vs Japan, Yugioh vs Pokemon, Poimandres vs Zarathustra, Giordano Bruno vs Friedrich Nietzsche, haystack picnic robed in silver rods to treasures of lore and sacred spark to unite and forge dancing stars and futures refracting crystal moonlight lures of hanger bay crunching fabrics webbing steel and blizzards juice stringing code red trains of yonder fluid ribbons trophy waterfall cake blueprints frenzy retracting haunted capital terra horns of leading edge canopy blossoms rendezvous shuffling Articuno!!
RaptorWizard Sci-Fi Empire Lugia Bunny ~ Ultimate Aeon Willpower: Wes Net (the16types.info)
My guess is involves a certain amount of coziness & a merry attitude in the midst of open-minded exploration.
Alpha partners would go on trips, reflect, converse about ideas & embrace the humor of daily life.
Probably the one area RaptorWizard's responses are perfectly suited..
I think it's hard to pin down and changes for everybody.
For me, it's extremely intense and not a choice. I remember I would look up stuff I would normally dismiss as complete woo, like twin souls and that kind of thing. It's like you stop caring about anything else and it completely destroys and remakes your personality.
Last edited by ouronis; 08-25-2021 at 10:57 PM.
Unless I'm thinking of the love people have for their children. That love is unconditional, and ever present, regardless of the situation. The love feels permanent and unwavering. To me it feels like I ultimately decided to allow my heart to walk around outside of my body.
Man grows used to everything, the scoundrel!
-Raskolnikov