Instinct stackings: sx-last

[The Exception]

Sx last gives you people like me and Expat.

[Creepy-male]

And sx-first gives you crazy people like Gul

Actually, /threadjack. I like Nick's way of looking at sx, but I want to add that I don't think the radar pings are necessarily conscious.

[redbaron]

And sx-first gives you crazy people like Gul

Actually, /threadjack. I like Nick's way of looking at sx, but I want to add that I don't think the radar pings are necessarily conscious.

radar pings?

[Creepy-male]

sx-primaries will always have a 'pushing toward' energy about them IMO -- it's part of the polarizing attraction/repulsion manner of going about things. Like, I'll always feel this pulsating awareness of my 'state' as it relates to my environment and the various things in it. By focusing energy on any given thing, a reaction will occur, which I will register in order to 're-shift' the state -- for better or worse. Everything occurs like that, and it feels like a constant throbbing of stimuli that can be pursued, pushed, discarded, whatever.

This makes it sound very conscious and directed to me. Like, hitting a button to get a radar sweep.

[strrrng]

Sx last gives you people like me and Expat.

Righteous upholders of the delta aristocracy

And sx-first gives you crazy people like Gul

Actually, /threadjack. I like Nick's way of looking at sx, but I want to add that I don't think the radar pings are necessarily conscious.

radar pings?

He's referring to the momentary 'feelings' of attraction/repulsion that occur with sx-primaries (see my previous description). I agree that they're not all conscious -- that would be overwhelming -- but I still think the significant ones are, or at least the ones a person cares to focus on. I feel like I always know which are relevant for me, and act on them accordingly.

[Creepy-Diana]

.

[strrrng]

This makes it sound very conscious and directed to me. Like, hitting a button to get a radar sweep.

Well, it's like, whatever you happen to focus your energy on will naturally cause a reaction, to varying degrees. So, it is like a radar scanning, in that sense: the drive is to find the most powerful "ping," and the scanning is constantly occurring, to gauge various stimuli for their respective relevance ('charge').

[strrrng]

Hmm. Could you say that sx lasts seem like an energy sink to those who aren't sx last? As in all energy gets absorbed and dissipated by them, sunk, and gone, while with other instintual variants it's reflected by or creates a positive feedback loop, increasing feedback between the two? Yes, or no? Is that what's being said?

Yeah. Pretty much.

[ArchonAlarion]

Sx last gives you people like me and Expat.

ew.

lets talk about so instead.

[Creepy-Diana]

.

[ArchonAlarion]

yes I do think this happens.

I would prefer someone who is so/sx or sx/so. The sp would turn me off a bit.

[strrrng]

I have a question, re the comment about best compatibility between identical stackings. Do you (you in general, not anyone in specific) think that compatibility between non-socionically favorable types increases enough to be nearly favorable if of aligned instintcual stackings? What about between favorable socionics relationships - could a clash of stackings cause less favorable relationships between them? What do you think?

I think either case is plausible. For example, I've always gotten along extremely well with christy_b (who is Ne-INFj), and it was clear that the "common ground" with us was being sx 4s. Now, this isn't the only case of that; there are gammas I have communicated well with in this regard, etc. And yes, even if the two people are duals, an instinctual incompatibility will affect things. The respective drives will grate on the individuals over time. Instincts feel more fundamentally experiential, so the way you'll relate to people in that regard has more to do with your native disposition towards things. Socionics is just about clarity of information communication... so yeah.

[strrrng]

yes I do think this happens.

I would prefer someone who is so/sx or sx/so. The sp would turn me off a bit.

I almost wonder sometimes whether an sp/sx or sx/so would annoy me more. Ultimately, I still think the primary instinct compatibility is more significant.

[FDG]

I almost wonder sometimes whether an sp/sx or sx/so would annoy me more. Ultimately, I still think the primary instinct compatibility is more significant.

People say I'm sp/sx soo...you can check your level of annoyance towards me

[redbaron]

I almost wonder sometimes whether an sp/sx or sx/so would annoy me more. Ultimately, I still think the primary instinct compatibility is more significant.

Yes, I agree. Interestingly, many guys I've been attracted to in the past (including my husband) are sp/so.

[Creepy-male]

At least, externally, do sx tend to just sort of pop up out of nowhere *really close* to you?

Brill did this, and an ILE from school too (and he's the hyper-focused, not very sociable type too).

EDIT

Brilliand is no longer sx-first, lol. Never mind.

The question still stands, though.

[redbaron]

I have a question, re the comment about best compatibility between identical stackings. Do you (you in general, not anyone in specific) think that compatibility between non-socionically favorable types increases enough to be nearly favorable if of aligned instintcual stackings? What about between favorable socionics relationships - could a clash of stackings cause less favorable relationships between them? What do you think?

It makes sense to me that it would be a factor. I don't know that all three stackings need to be aligned necessarily. I sort of think that for someone like me who is so-last, I would benefit (and have indeed benefited) from being with someone who is so-second. My husband is good at pulling me off the couch and getting me a bit more involved. Which is good for me. But I do think that for the primary stacking, it's better to be alike and that stackings can have an affect either way. (making positive socionics relations worse or worse ones better)

[strrrng]

People say I'm sp/sx soo...you can check your level of annoyance towards me

Not too high


And I do think you're a pretty good exemplar of that stacking (along with starfall).

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

Intimate relationships never have played a pivotal role in my life. I tend to think the whole marriage thing is overrated.

My intimate/interpersonal relationships are pretty much everything in my life. As long as I have that I am perfectly happy with whatever happens.

[yeves]

Actually, I can attest to this to a certain extent. Except for me I tend to be socially-oriented. A veritable social butterfly if you will. But I get claustrophobic of intimate space. I struggle to develop close relationships because if people get too close too quickly I start pushing away in a need to protect my intimate space.

BP is also so/sp and he's expressed similar sentiments. We call it Scorched Earth policy. Social Social Social - INTIMATE!!! - Nuke everything.

why does sx-last have so much trouble in the intimate space? how do they make friends if they are so frightened of getting personal?

[Froody Blue Gem]

With sx-lasts, I would say if it's hard to get to that point of deep connection and they are clearly awkward with that, and don't get past guardedness. With sp firsts not showing intense emotions outwardly. Not very good at conversation when it goes into the getting-to-know-you stuff, especially with sp/so. With so/sp, there may be a group orientedness but a pushing away when trying to get to that deeper level.

I actually am an sx last... There was one sx-dom who described sx last in an sp/so sno matter how many times you talk to an sp/so, the feeling of distance never leaves. I personally wasn't entirely conscious of this until it was pointed out, and it may appear that way to an extreme sx-dom. It's hard for us sx-blinds to know what's missing from us variant wise unless someone with an opposite blindspot, or is extreme in our blindspot points it.

[maniac]

yea if someone feels like they have no "sex appeal" to them they're usually sx last. its pretty basic. unfortunately everyone's confused about the sexual instinct because of certain enneagram teachers who have tried to remake the sx instinct to "intimacy instinct"

[Averroes]

Lack of hoes

[persimmonism]

Lack of hoes

Actually the fuckboi stereotype is very SX-last.

[Averroes]

Actually the fuckboi stereotype is very SX-last.

seems more sx-second. Sx-lasts aren’t charming enough on a one on one level to hook anyone

[Averroes]

Sx last trait: I spend a lot of time thinking about whether it’s socially or relationally appropriate to reach out/send feelers or approach someone that I like instead of just doing it. I have all of these rules in my head that are routinely broken by Sx types who can just follow their whims and vibe with whoever they want as long as they're receptive

[Aquamarine]

Sx last trait: I spend a lot of time thinking about whether it’s socially or relationally appropriate to reach out/send feelers or approach someone that I like instead of just doing it. I have all of these rules in my head that are routinely broken by Sx types who can just follow their whims and vibe with whoever they want as long as they're receptive

Don't take this the wrong way but I notice you seem to attribute traits that you have to being sx last/ because you think you're sx last. Not everything is enneagram. There are so many other factors that go into why people act the way they do.

[InterPrizeWes]

Don't take this the wrong way but I notice you seem to attribute traits that you have to being sx last/ because you think you're sx last. Not everything is enneagram. There are so many other factors that go into why people act the way they do.

Ya, I agree with this completely, that the auras and channels of personality expression and force of charm are covered in gizmos everywhere across the clock!!