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Thread: LIIs and friendship - Do any INTjs feel like ...

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    intjguy's Avatar
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    Default LIIs and friendship - Do any INTjs feel like ...

    ..your friends waste your time? I'd rather turn off my cell phone especially on weekends because it feels like an electronic leash.
    In no way should one act contrary to the great future you have before you.

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    well not an intj... im an esfj... why would you feel like that?

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    really a hard time saying no? lol thats funny its easy though its only two letters n-o-

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    ahh thats so funny yet so cute!

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    hehe!

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    This is an INTj weakness for sure. I think the cure all answer for this is to use the magic sentence "Let me think about it."

    Of course that is if "No" is far too difficult.
    In no way should one act contrary to the great future you have before you.

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    Quote Originally Posted by pumpkin View Post
    well not an intj... im an esfj... why would you feel like that?
    When you're hanging out with friends you're not really learning anything (growing). If they have nothing to do with my personal interest in training or learning something, what's the point? In retrospect, they might as well be holding my hand.

    Waste of time.

    They say that iron sharpens iron. But what if your friends are plastic? They just hold you back, in this case it better to be alone and choose yourself as an opponent. For the past 5 years friends have wasted my time... and once it's gone it's gone. Oh wells.

    And THEN, there's such despicable friends who grow envious and are happy to see you go down. Unchangeable maggots they are.
    Last edited by intjguy; 06-06-2009 at 11:44 AM.
    In no way should one act contrary to the great future you have before you.

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    I hate my phone, but it really depends on what I'm doing. If I'm working on a project, or thinking about something important and someone wants to talk to me, it can be hard for me to take my mind off of whatever it is I'm doing. I usually avoid my friends when I'm busy like this so I don't have to brush them off and seem rude.
    The saddest ESFj

    ...

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    Sauron, The Great Enemy ArchonAlarion's Avatar
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    I don't use my phone much.

    And I like my alone time although sometimes I over do it.
    The end is nigh

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    I don't have any demands. I must be making fairly decent preventions. If I had a demand, I would usually ask for the reason involving it, and usually it's something dumb such as "because we're going to do this, and I was thinking that you could do this too." And of course I respond, "ah, I'll see what I can do."

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    take a second of me sarinana's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MaliaFee View Post
    *giggle* I know, right?

    A friend of his brother-in-law asked him if he would play the drums at their gig (he already has a million music things going on and did NOT want to play with this guy on Friday night when he already had plans) but he responded, "Sure, sounds good man." AND THEN... he was kicking himself all evening afterwards. He's not scared to check out a scary noise outside but he doesn't like saying no to people. :/
    off topic.... but..... who typed you ESE? you don't seem like one at all....

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    Sauron, The Great Enemy ArchonAlarion's Avatar
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    lol what?

    ... Malia is like totally ESFj and at the very least Alpha SF.

    Perhaps your conception of an ESFj is off, Sarinana?
    The end is nigh

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    Btw Archon..here have some FE ISFPUSSY.

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    take a second of me sarinana's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ArchonAlarion View Post
    lol what?

    ... Malia is like totally ESFj and at the very least Alpha SF.

    Perhaps your conception of an ESFj is off, Sarinana?
    Maybe. But if she is actually ESFj.... this would only certify my opinion that VI shouldn't be used alone.

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    lol@people who whine about their cellphones. you guys do know that you can live life without even owning one right? just throw the fucker away, and all that stress is gone.

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    Quote Originally Posted by sarinana View Post
    Maybe. But if she is actually ESFj.... this would only certify my opinion that VI shouldn't be used alone.
    it shouldn't

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    <something> Wynch's Avatar
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    @OP: I find the same problem as a few people brought up, I have a hard time saying no and I sometimes run myself ragged spending time with all my friends. Sometimes I just want to turn my phone off, and just sit by myself. Mostly, though, I hate when I'm forced to confirm doing something, because I always want to keep my plans open. I prefer spontaneous last minute activities to planning ahead. My new roomie is definitely good for that, I tend to come home from work and he'll say "Let's go, we're all heading to so-and-so's house for some fun!" I like living that way.
    ILE
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    Very busy with work. Only kind of around.

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    tuturututu set up some sufficient contracts.

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    take a second of me sarinana's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ephemeros View Post
    What makes you think that?
    ah forget that..

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bionicgoat View Post
    lol@people who whine about their cellphones. you guys do know that you can live life without even owning one right? just throw the fucker away, and all that stress is gone.
    Yea that's one of the funny things about Ti types. We always bitch about how people keep bothering us, but we're dependable so we always keep an eye on the phone. It's not that we don't want people to depend on us, it's that we want to be recognized for being dependable.
    The saddest ESFj

    ...

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    I just like being known as dependable so that when opportunity arises, I'm asked to come along. And I don't have difficulty saying no. To me there's no better reason than that. I don't really get phone calls to go out and about to do things, so dependability isn't that big of a deal right now. Dependability to me is not the same as availability. Dependability means keeping ones promise, following through. I could care less if someone can't get a hold of me because I'm busy at that time. Doesn't mean I won't call them back soon.

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    take a second of me sarinana's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MaliaFee View Post
    On the topic of how I came to ESE conclusion:

    *Several different people have now typed me as this.

    *I took Rick's socionics test and got ESE.

    *The more I read about what socionics dichotomies actually mean, the more certain I am that I'm ESE.

    *I'm 99.9% sure my boyfriend is INTj and the more I read about duality the more sure I am that our relationship is one of duality.

    *I look different in all sorts of different pictures, as you can see throughout this thread: http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...ong-sorry.html so if you're just looking at the picture in my avatar, that's not a very good sample photo for VI imo.

    *More stuff...

    I always thought I was an introvert because I have a fair amount of social anxiety at times, and I prefer smaller groups to large groups in social interaction. However, I had no idea what being a socionics introvert or extravert meant. Now that I know, I am an obvious socionics extravert/trim (I can back that up with lots of details, if anyone wants).

    One thing that isn't in question is that I'm Alpha SF, and the EJ temperament fits me far better than the IP temperament.

    There are a lot of other little things, but again, I'll answer if anybody wants to know more.

    ---


    Curious why I don't seem like ESE?



    I think Bush had many encounters with alphas in his life.

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    Ti centric krieger's Avatar
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    Never had a cellphone. I hate the things with a passion.

    I can't relate to the issue of having difficulty responding with no to requests.

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    Quote Originally Posted by labcoat View Post
    Never had a cellphone. I hate the things with a passion.
    +1,000,000 me too

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    Quote Originally Posted by Carla View Post
    *humph*
    Quote Originally Posted by tuturututu View Post
    Btw Archon..here have some FE ISFPUSSY.
    Quote Originally Posted by intjguy View Post
    When you're hanging out with friends you're not really learning anything (growing). If they have nothing to do with my personal interest in training or learning something, what's the point? In retrospect, they might as well be holding my hand.

    Waste of time.

    They say that iron sharpens iron. But what if your friends are plastic? They just hold you back, in this case it better to be alone and choose yourself as an opponent. For the past 5 years friends have wasted my time... and once it's gone it's gone. Oh wells.

    And THEN, there's such despicable friends who grow envious and are happy to see you go down. Unchangeable maggots they are.

    wowwwwee never really saw it that way... you need some new friends! it really makes me sad to hear this

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    Quote Originally Posted by glamourama View Post
    hm so in your experience (or anyone else who wants to comment): if an INTj says they're going to think about it, often the answer is "no" but they don't want to say it?
    In my experience, it's either that I'm feeling some pressure like I know the person is expecting a certain answer and I know I'll really disappoint him/her if I don't give that answer. It doesn't really matter if I will or will not give that answer, the pressure alone is enough to make me hesitate.

    edit: actually, I may need to rethink this.
    Last edited by electric sheep; 06-08-2009 at 07:26 AM.
    The saddest ESFj

    ...

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    Quote Originally Posted by sarinana View Post
    Maybe. But if she is actually ESFj.... this would only certify my opinion that VI shouldn't be used alone.
    In my opinion, it should barely be used at all. Socionics is about intertype relations. I don't see how you can get that information from someone's appearance. (I should also say that I do agree that there is a connection between someone's appearance and their personality. However, it's just extra information that usually can't tell you more than what you can get by interviewing someone. So, if it is used, it should be used sparingly.)

    Jason

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    I don't own a cell phone, and I receive few calls. I would actually like it if people called me more often. However, I wouldn't like it if I were being called all the time.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bionicgoat View Post
    lol@people who whine about their cellphones. you guys do know that you can live life without even owning one right? just throw the fucker away, and all that stress is gone.
    I have one for emergency purposes only. It's always turned off unless I need to make a call. It's a pay-as-you-go and costs me $5 per month. I hate cell phones.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Poster Nutbag The Exception's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fear of sleep View Post
    I hate my phone, but it really depends on what I'm doing. If I'm working on a project, or thinking about something important and someone wants to talk to me, it can be hard for me to take my mind off of whatever it is I'm doing. I usually avoid my friends when I'm busy like this so I don't have to brush them off and seem rude.
    100% agree here.
    LII-Ne with strong EII tendencies, 6w7-9w1-3w4 so/sp/sx, INxP



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    Quote Originally Posted by glamourama View Post
    hm so in your experience (or anyone else who wants to comment): if an INTj says they're going to think about it, often the answer is "no" but they don't want to say it?
    Yes, that is often the case. But sometimes saying "I want to think about it" means exactly that.
    LII-Ne with strong EII tendencies, 6w7-9w1-3w4 so/sp/sx, INxP



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    Quote Originally Posted by glamourama
    hm so in your experience (or anyone else who wants to comment): if an INTj says they're going to think about it, often the answer is "no" but they don't want to say it?
    When I say I'm going to think about it, often the answer is "no" but I don't want to say it. When I say I'm going to think about it, sometimes it means that I want to think about it. First scenario is more common. I believe it has to do something with Ne and Se-PoLR.

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    I'm not the biggest fan of phones and sometimes I wish I never got one. I'll make necessary phone calls, or calls to confirm plans. It feels like a waste of time when its just texting/talking for the sake of it. I need to prepare in advanced when talking on the phone because when people call me out of the blue, it kind of freaks me out. I enjoy time with friends in moderation, but I don't enjoy it when people need to talk every waking moment. There are times when I make plans with people, but part of me wants to spend the day alone.

    I enjoy it when I get there but part of me is conflicted. They are good for keeping in touch with people and keeping the time if you don't have a watch on you, but many people spend too much of their time on them, and it bothers me when people send me a ton of text messages. It sometimes comes across like they are using me as a tool to kill their boredom. In this day and age, that is nearly unheard of though. I prefer texting over calls but in my weird mind, that can count as intruding on alone time.
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