Betas and Public Displays of Affection

[leftylib]

Actually, recent events have taught me that I do use PDA as a barometer of how a relationship is going.

So kissing hello, hugging, holding hands when walking - I think these are all healthy and almost expected in a relationship. When they don't happen, I start to think something is wrong. Or I at least judge the quality of the relationship on that basis.

P.S. It occurred to me a couple of days later that you can also judge the quality of a relationship by your diary entries.

Lefty
ENFJ
4w5

[silverchris9]

@leftylib: I think everyone is programmed by the culture they live in. Betas enjoy being countercultural as a trend, but if you're defined by being counter-something, you're still defined by the something, insofar as your identity is subsequent/consequent and the culture has priority (temporal, ontological?, causative etc.). Also, we all have to live in the world. There is always the triumph of life over the imagination, and the imagination is a part of the will-to-motion or the will-to-change. Betas may typically resist harder than other types, but nevertheless more of our attitudes/assumptions/beliefs/mores/opinions/etc., are socially overdetermined and you and I think or even have the cognitive power to discover and certainly not to undo. Also, The Kerouac you posted was beautiful. Hey Stella is earth-shattering.

PDA is good if it is the Hey Stella variety. I believe that betas in general (or at least IEIs in general) would find PDA wonderful if it is the Hey Stella kind: that kind represents reality. But if it is the fake kind then we hate it. Just like how the IEI Lyrist, supposedly given to florid language, has extraordinarily high sensitivity to and revulsion from sentimental or sappy things, because they are "fake". Fake PDA is much, much worse than no PDA at all. And real PDA tends to be targeted, specific, and deeply psychologically motivated (I sound like an acting coach) rather than frequent, indiscriminate, and shallowly sexually motivated face-sucking.

Not that I couldn't go for a good face-sucking every now and then.

[leftylib]

@leftylib: I think everyone is programmed by the culture they live in. Betas enjoy being countercultural as a trend, but if you're defined by being counter-something, you're still defined by the something, insofar as your identity is subsequent/consequent and the culture has priority (temporal, ontological?, causative etc.). Also, we all have to live in the world. There is always the triumph of life over the imagination, and the imagination is a part of the will-to-motion or the will-to-change. Betas may typically resist harder than other types, but nevertheless more of our attitudes/assumptions/beliefs/mores/opinions/etc., are socially overdetermined and you and I think or even have the cognitive power to discover and certainly not to undo. Also, The Kerouac you posted was beautiful. Hey Stella is earth-shattering.

PDA is good if it is the Hey Stella variety. I believe that betas in general (or at least IEIs in general) would find PDA wonderful if it is the Hey Stella kind: that kind represents reality. But if it is the fake kind then we hate it. Just like how the IEI Lyrist, supposedly given to florid language, has extraordinarily high sensitivity to and revulsion from sentimental or sappy things, because they are "fake". Fake PDA is much, much worse than no PDA at all. And real PDA tends to be targeted, specific, and deeply psychologically motivated (I sound like an acting coach) rather than frequent, indiscriminate, and shallowly sexually motivated face-sucking.

Not that I couldn't go for a good face-sucking every now and then.

love is beautiful

lefty
enfj
4w5

[Nevero]

the one IEI guy that I could type with some certainty likes letting his hands loose around his girlfriend. she's probably IEE and doesn't mind.

[miss BabyDoll]

depends on what type of PDAs we're talking about haha

[Amber]