I'm an ISTJ and super introverted due to being under alot of stress right now because of classes. I feel like my introversion is becoming more accentuated under this period of prolonged stress and fatigue, especially my primary function which is introverted sensing.
As an introvert I have been "blessed" (or maybe cursed) with being able to focus internally on the things and people around me.
The problem is when something or, inevitably someone, catches my interest, I turn my head and see.
I must also note I am not in any kind of relationsip at the current time.
The exact problem I have is druing class: Male-female ration in class in 4:25 (4 males, 25 women). Inevitably, there are girls I find attractive on diffrent scales in class. There is this girl I cant seem to be able to not look at during class. I have tried sitting at the back far behind her, but whenever she turn back to talk to someone, I cant help but look and she catches me. This is extrememly frustraing to me. I have become super selfconscious about this.
And just so you know, I have tried to talk to this person in the past, 2 years ago at a c**ktail but I was violently turned down. I find her achingly beautiful and just as despisable for her behavior towards me since that very event. Ironic eh?
I do talk to people in class, girls and guys ALL INTROVERTS . So at least i dont pass off as a total loner or total antisocial freak (yes, im still conscious about how extraverts oerceive me).
I fear I'm getting perceived by this girl as abnoral or worse, freakish because of this.
I litteraly am physically unable not to look. It happens to me at least 3 times a day, during the 4 hour class.