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Thread: Deltas on this forum vs. hanging out in real life

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  1. #1
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    Default Deltas on this forum vs. hanging out in real life

    Either that, or I'm not Delta either....

    I don't know if it's bc of mistypings or because Deltas just don't come across well in type [myself included, I'm sure], but... yeah. Sometimes I read something here and think, WTF? I would not get along w this person irl at all! Luckily, I hang out with a fair few Deltas in real life who are genuinely kick-ass, so I dismiss the forum mis-matches as flukes and/or the results of people mistyping themselves.

    Of course, I'm fully aware of the great possibility that it is in fact I who am mistyped, but I don't think so at this point.

    What are your thoughts??

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    Deltas appear to require a more intimate understanding of the person for their posts to really make sense an understand where they are coming from.

    I have moments where I say things that are strange and out of line. Some other people here are very "normal", some a very much related to a certain kind of upbringing. Deltas can keep much of "themselves" in private.

    I'm not sure if that answers anything though.
    Posts I wrote in the past contain less nuance.
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    I feel the same way as SongOfSappho about Deltas on the forum.
    I think non-socionic factors play a large role. I mean, these are people separated by culture, distance, age.... You barely love everyone you know irl, who is to say you'll love these people just because they're in your quadra?
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    When I post here, I only reveal a tiny, if any, fraction of myself. And I don't really know other people here. I suspect I come across quite differently here than to those who really know me.

    I'm also not that concerned about revealing myself to people on internet forum anyway, it's not really the place for people to get to know each other (I feel.)

    Although I have made some friends through one on one contacts over time, and they probably see me quite differently than however I look or am perceived on forum posts.

    I'm quite sure I don't do delta justice, although I don't know if that's my concern. I'm just doing my own thing here

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    Quote Originally Posted by UDP View Post
    Deltas appear to require a more intimate understanding of the person for their posts to really make sense an understand where they are coming from.

    I have moments where I say things that are strange and out of line. Some other people here are very "normal", some a very much related to a certain kind of upbringing. Deltas can keep much of "themselves" in private.

    I'm not sure if that answers anything though.
    I agree with this, especially the bolded part. We want/need to go deeper in order to feel like we understand or relate to someone.

    I guess Deltas are pretty individualistic to begin with, so it is unlikely that we'll relate to the group atmosphere as much. Like UDP said, we need that deeper knowledge of the person, the one-on-one thing. I feel like I'm able to do this even here to some extent (though admittedly not nearly as well as through other mediums), so when I say that I relate to the Delta vibe that means that I always look at what people have to say individually and relate to them as individuals first and foremost, but somehow I am able to connect those individual impressions into "what it's like to be Delta." So when I say I relate to Delta, I mean the individuals that are in Delta. Eh, I'm probably way off topic here, just thought I'd share.
    Last edited by Sirena; 11-18-2008 at 03:12 PM.

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    The forum may not do our quadra justice... but who gives a fuck, yah? We still like each other.

    Besides, we tend to be individualists anyways... so the collective tends to not hold much sway. Well, at least not to me.
    "Those who make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities..."

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  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by UDP View Post
    Deltas appear to require a more intimate understanding of the person for their posts to really make sense an understand where they are coming from.
    I have moments where I say things that are strange and out of line. Some other people here are very "normal", some a very much related to a certain kind of upbringing. Deltas can keep much of "themselves" in private.

    I'm not sure if that answers anything though.
    Great point, and I think this addresses my question/quandary/whatever it was. And because that is almost inevitably missing in the context of an internet forum, it contributes to the sense of... unnaturalness... that's been bothering me.

    Quote Originally Posted by Sirena View Post
    I can't say I share your sentiments here. Although I realize this is an imperfect medium and there are mistypings, overall I tend to relate and agree with Deltas here over any other quadra members.
    On the whole, I relate/agree w Deltas here more than any others as well; I'm sorry if my original post made it sound like that wasn't the case [Ah the joys of typed communication!]. Reading Jessica's "jumping ship" thread and discussing the issues behind that is what prompted me to ask this question, because prior to her writing that I thought I was the only one feeling that way; after she said a lot of the same things, I grew curious to see what others thought....

    I don't know if this may have anything to do with me looking at the big picture versus maybe you focusing on individual occurrences or people, while failing to see the overall impression and therefore concluding that because you don't relate to a couple of the deltas here, that means you don't relate to the general Delta vibe.
    I hadn't actually concluded that; I am still pretty certain of my Delta-ness [and more particularly, my SLI-ness], but I wrote that to head off possible responses of, "Well then you must not be a Delta!" the likes of which I've seen thrown at others around here. And also, to try and keep an open mind in case anyone did have other quadra/type suggestions.

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    Perhaps because of the inherent individuality, there won't be much of a delta consensus - at least in some terms.

    You've got the very serious people. There are those who are more lighthearted. The people interested in philosophy or thoughts or spirituality. The people who are older and married and just come here in little bits. You've got the party people, the looser, more chill people. And many different takes on type.

    And maybe because of all of these variations it's harder to tell what "delta" is, on a superficial level. Beta = "loud", gamma = strange distance/money thing, alpha = happy/easygoing. Delta? Maybe it's not that easy to rattle off a slogan.
    Posts I wrote in the past contain less nuance.
    If you're in this forum to learn something, be careful. Lots of misplaced toxicity.

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    ~a certain mysterious power that may prove terribly fascinating to the extraverted man, for it touches his unconscious.

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    Quote Originally Posted by LokiVanguard View Post
    The forum may not do our quadra justice... but who gives a fuck, yah? We still like each other.

    Besides, we tend to be individualists anyways... so the collective tends to not hold much sway. Well, at least not to me.
    +1

    I'm not entirely sure I'm delta, but I like a lot of people here and there and a theory or a forum about a theory of how we all get along can more or less suck it compared to what actually goes on in the world. I wouldn't stress about it, sappho.
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    You mean Deltas aren't all sweet, kind, stupid people with no backbones who sit in a circle singing Kumbya together all the time? Who would have thought.
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    I would say the most important thing is to determine your main porpoise in life.

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    I didn't read the whole thread, but all I have to say is don't forget how many people who post here are unhealthy in various degrees that constantly fluctuate.
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    I can't say I share your sentiments here. Although I realize this is an imperfect medium and there are mistypings, overall I tend to relate and agree with Deltas here over any other quadra members. I don't know if this may have anything to do with me looking at the big picture versus maybe you focusing on individual occurrences or people, while failing to see the overall impression and therefore concluding that because you don't relate to a couple of the deltas here, that means you don't relate to the general Delta vibe.

    This is how I understood your question/comment anyway. It's possible that I've misinterpreted you. Also, keep in mind that IRL the people that you're friends with you've chosen based on more than their type. Other factors come into play. Whereas on here you're talking to a bunch of strangers that you may or may not have much in common with, regardless of type and viewing them as the representation of Delta on the forum. IRL you're not likely to be put in a room to discuss different topics with random people who you haven't already established some sort of mutual connection with.

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    Quote Originally Posted by songofsappho View Post
    Either that, or I'm not Delta either....

    I don't know if it's bc of mistypings or because Deltas just don't come across well in type [myself included, I'm sure], but... yeah. Sometimes I read something here and think, WTF? I would not get along w this person irl at all! Luckily, I hang out with a fair few Deltas in real life who are genuinely kick-ass, so I dismiss the forum mis-matches as flukes and/or the results of people mistyping themselves.

    Of course, I'm fully aware of the great possibility that it is in fact I who am mistyped, but I don't think so at this point.

    What are your thoughts??
    I think you're aware I feel the same way. I think either I am mistyped, others are mistyped or we're all coming across as different types online as I can't identify with most of the deltas outside of the ISTP's. Frankly, it's hard for me to feel the desire to even come into Delta anymore. Some things, as you said, i'm just left with a WTF feeling...like if some people are honestly like this in real life, i'd probobly run the other way. I don't mean this to offend anyone, these are just my personal thoughts and I had to get them out because it's very confusing for me. I am still very open to being ISTP--and in all honesty I still think that is my type but yeah...it's just all confusing. There are people i do enjoy and do identify with, but overall, i don't think I'll be hanging around this quadra much anymore for said reasons as I don't feel i have anything in common with most of the people here. You shouldn't have to feel like you have to walk on eggshells and that's how Im feeling whenever i come in here.

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    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    I think you're aware I feel the same way. I think either I am mistyped, others are mistyped or we're all coming across as different types online as I can't identify with most of the deltas outside of the ISTP's. Frankly, it's hard for me to feel the desire to even come into Delta anymore. Some things, as you said, i'm just left with a WTF feeling...like if some people are honestly like this in real life, i'd probobly run the other way. I don't mean this to offend anyone, these are just my personal thoughts and I had to get them out because it's very confusing for me. I am still very open to being ISTP--and in all honesty I still think that is my type but yeah...it's just all confusing. There are people i do enjoy and do identify with, but overall, i don't think I'll be hanging around this quadra much anymore for said reasons as I don't feel i have anything in common with most of the people here. You shouldn't have to feel like you have to walk on eggshells and that's how Im feeling whenever i come in here.
    Yeah, understood. I hope you can find some Deltas irl to hang out with... you never know, maybe they'll be in the Air Force, even. [I personally think ISTp's would do pretty well there, though for no real reason other than I think I would enjoy/be good at flying the planes!].

    That's why I started this thread: because I think a lot of what's frustrating about this place is the result of the aforementioned flaws of an internet forum, not Deltas themselves.

    Cheers.

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    Quote Originally Posted by songofsappho View Post
    Either that, or I'm not Delta either....

    I don't know if it's bc of mistypings or because Deltas just don't come across well in type [myself included, I'm sure], but... yeah. Sometimes I read something here and think, WTF? I would not get along w this person irl at all! Luckily, I hang out with a fair few Deltas in real life who are genuinely kick-ass, so I dismiss the forum mis-matches as flukes and/or the results of people mistyping themselves.

    Of course, I'm fully aware of the great possibility that it is in fact I who am mistyped, but I don't think so at this point.

    What are your thoughts??
    Most people on this forum belong in institutions with locks on the outside of the front door... Regardless of quadra, there are only a few who seem to be sensible, intelligent, and chill, (the OP among them--hi songofsappho)

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    Quote Originally Posted by JuJu View Post
    Most people on this forum belong in institutions with locks on the outside of the front door... Regardless of quadra, there are only a few who seem to be sensible, intelligent, and chill, (the OP among them--hi songofsappho)
    At least they aren't morons.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Subterranean View Post
    At least they aren't morans.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker Mom View Post
    Not all duality combos are going to get along fantastically well. It means you understand each other and communicate well. But it could mean you understand the other person sucks and are easily able to communicate that to them.
    The quote above should become this forum's motto.

    There are some great people in Delta--Jessica, UDP, Ritella, Cyclops, SoS, LokiV, SM, tiny dancer, Director Abbie, and on and on--many! (Remember IcePick?)

    Not liking Mikemex has less to do with Socionics and more to do with most forum member's ability to read... Like the Tom Petty song, Mikemex "don't come around here no more" (much,) and as SM said, he's probably mistyped. (She's right--mistyping is rampant overall.)

    Beyond that, there are dipshits and disgraces in every quadra... Take a look around Beta and then pat yourselves on the back.

    Quote Originally Posted by Subterranean View Post
    At least they aren't morons.
    LOL!! SubT.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Winterpark View Post
    If it's of any comfort, I feel the same way about certain few self-typed IEE's here [...]
    Wow - it's kind of weird [and weirdly comforting] to find out I wasn't the only one thinking this. Yay, identicals.

    Quote Originally Posted by LokiVanguard View Post
    lol

    And, wtf

    Quote Originally Posted by JuJu View Post
    There are some great people in Delta--Jessica, UDP, Ritella, Cyclops, SoS, LokiV, SM, tiny dancer, Director Abbie, and on and on--many! (Remember IcePick?)

    [...]

    Beyond that, there are dipshits and disgraces in every quadra... Take a look around Beta and then pat yourselves on the back.
    Definitely agree.

    -

    I do want to clarify that this thread was not started w the intention of bashing a type or a person, although MikeMex's name in particular has come up a few times.... fwiw I agree that he's mistyped, but I think he's one of several [or many]. Just wanted to throw that out there.

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    Quote Originally Posted by songofsappho View Post
    And, wtf

    Quote Originally Posted by JuJu
    There are some great people in Delta--Jessica, UDP, Ritella, Cyclops, SoS, LokiV, SM, tiny dancer, Director Abbie, and on and on--many! (Remember IcePick?)

    [...]

    Beyond that, there are dipshits and disgraces in every quadra... Take a look around Beta and then pat yourselves on the back.
    Yeah, WTF? ALL people in Delta are great!!!! ME AND SONGOFSAPPHO ARE DEEPLY HURT THAT WE ARE NOT INCLUDED ON THE LIST.
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    Quote Originally Posted by songofsappho View Post
    Either that, or I'm not Delta either....

    I don't know if it's bc of mistypings or because Deltas just don't come across well in type [myself included, I'm sure], but... yeah. Sometimes I read something here and think, WTF? I would not get along w this person irl at all! Luckily, I hang out with a fair few Deltas in real life who are genuinely kick-ass, so I dismiss the forum mis-matches as flukes and/or the results of people mistyping themselves.

    Of course, I'm fully aware of the great possibility that it is in fact I who am mistyped, but I don't think so at this point.

    What are your thoughts??
    I see two things that can cause that, and even though they've both been mentioned I'll mention them again. 1) A forum is a limited and somewhat different kind of communication than you would experience in real life. There are a lot of hinderances to understanding, plus many aspects of a person can be exaggerated, just like other aspects can be hidden. 2) Even in real life there are individual differences in people, even those of the same type. Those non-socionic differences can make things better or worse in terms of how well people interact with each other.

    A third thing that I might as well mention is that even the "ideal" relation, duality, does not mean perfect understanding or resonance. In fact, that's part of the value in duality, that each type looks at and interacts with things differently, each has their own set of strengths. Which means that there are going to be differences, even in the best of relations.

    Anyway, just because you don't like someone, or because there are things about the person that you don't relate to at all, does not necessarily exclude them from your sharing your quadra, or even sharing your type.

    And, one more thing, if you - any of you - don't like me or something I do, just say it. (I'm feeling insecure with all this "some people" talk. )
    Oh, to find you in dreams - mixing prior, analog, and never-beens... facts slip and turn and change with little lucidity. except the strong, permeating reality of emotion.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Minde View Post

    And, one more thing, if you - any of you - don't like me or something I do, just say it. (I'm feeling insecure with all this "some people" talk. )
    Although I am pretty much unknown to this forum, please inform me also.
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Greeter View Post
    Although I am pretty much unknown to this forum, please inform me also.
    and me. seriously (there is no serious emoticon)
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  26. #26
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    I just can't bring me to tell you all how I feel

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    heh

    but, yeah, you shouldn't really have too.

    I joke a lot (all the time), but to be serious for a moment, I'd like to state that no one bugs me in this forum at all. It takes more than letters on a screen to get on my bad side, so don't worry
    I also highly doubt that I have offended anyone in my short time here, so don't worry about that either

    peace
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cyclops View Post
    I just can't bring me to tell you all how I feel
    I do not really see liking or disliking someone as a form of feeling, personally. For example, sometimes my 'feelings' towards my friends and family can be negative (and positive) depending on the situation but despite that I can still say I like them. This also applies to people I dislike.
    Ceci n'est pas une eii.




  29. #29
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    I was going to make an anonymous poll asking who in Delta pisses you off (for Delta in Delta quadrant) but meh, can't be bothered

  30. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Khamelion View Post
    I didn't read the whole thread, but all I have to say is don't forget how many people who post here are unhealthy in various degrees that constantly fluctuate.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cyclops View Post
    Heh, well said. This place is like some sort of therapy area or whatever that is called in mental health places. Like a form of group therapy and many other things like people taking their life frustrations out or upset at their parents telling them what to do and stuff, at least.
    This is interesting to me. I don't automatically consider whether people are "healthy" or not, and tbh I'm not even sure what criteria one would use to determine that. I guess I just assume everyone is healthy/stable, or at least as healthy/stable as I am since for all you people know I'm a nutjob myself But this point has been brought up a couple of times recently, and I think it's very valid.

    EDIT: Come to think of it, this is kind of a useless post; I've said nothing new here. Eh, whatever.
    Last edited by female; 11-20-2008 at 02:59 AM.

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    I will eventually read through this thread and give more thorough thoughts.

    But I'm sort of... not with it at the moment. (I don't have the energy nor the attention span to successfully do it)
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