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Thread: How Much Influence does the last relation have over the choice of the next?

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    Default How Much Influence does the last relation have over the choice of the next?

    so i was thinking that we all move in and out of relationships all the time, but for this question i'm thinking more of dating or romantic relationships. for example, in my 20's i went out with a guy who was kinda lazy for about 3 years, so the next guy i chose was pretty diligent. but he was also kind of cut-throat (SeTi) so the next guy i choose is more emotional and laid back.

    has anybody noticed these type of patterns over time? do we think we look for different info elements from people as we change relationships?

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

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    Such has been the case for me. The most notable example was going from a relationship with an LSE to a relationship with an LSI. He was the "anti-Kevin" in many ways.
    SEE

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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy View Post
    Such has been the case for me. The most notable example was going from a relationship with an LSE to a relationship with an LSI. He was the "anti-Kevin" in many ways.
    yeah...this is exactly what i was thinking about. i was wondering whether it could be understood in terms of information elements...like what were you missing from the last relationship that you seek in a consequent relationship.

    i think for me most recently it was not getting any action with the first, getting some action from the second, but no Fe, then seeking the Fe from the third. or something like that.

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

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    Sorry, I never get to choose. the extraverted girls are always the ones who trap me.
    "Those who make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities..."

    - Voltaire

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    I've gone from EII to SEE to ESI. Why? Because each time that person was the only one who I was interested in and who was interested in me also. If we remove that last part of the equation, I've been interested in probably half the types of the socion in the past. I don't think there's been any pattern to it. It's just been about who's there, who's available and who's interested in me (in that order).
    Last edited by BLauritson; 07-17-2008 at 05:32 PM. Reason: Added a whole sentence. Amazing, I know.
    ILI (Indescribable Lovemaking Inc.)
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    "IP temperament! Because today's concerns are tomorrow's indifferences!"

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    Uhm, even if I didn't have many relationships, and all my relationships have been with ESIs (lol) I can totally see how this plays out in a way which is similar to what Sunshine described in her first post. But I also think it's not that hard to find a good match.
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sunshine Lively View Post
    yeah...this is exactly what i was thinking about. i was wondering whether it could be understood in terms of information elements...like what were you missing from the last relationship that you seek in a consequent relationship.

    i think for me most recently it was not getting any action with the first, getting some action from the second, but no Fe, then seeking the Fe from the third. or something like that.
    Si creative to Se creative, EJ to IJ, Ni PoLR to Ni Hidden Agenda... yes, I believe there's a Socionics explanation for it.

    (Even the Fi Hidden Agenda to Fi Role was a relief at the time because I couldn't deal with the LSE's possessiveness and jealousy.)
    SEE

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    If a given person hasn't been stimulating a part of your mind for a while, then if that part of your mind is well developed then you will want in your next partner someone who can stimulate that part. It doesn't matter whether they can offer what the other partner gave in abundance; all that is sought at that point is the stimulus of that which went unstimulated.

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    bump

    any new thots on this?

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

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    My relationships (including important or semi-important ones to me at the time):

    1.) EII > ESI
    2.) IEE
    3.) SLE (very short lived, got dumped for an IEI)
    4.) LSE *shudders*
    5.) LSI
    6.) LII
    7.) ESI

    I also briefly dated an ESE and a couple other people who I haven't typed as well, but they weren't significant enough to put on the list.
    SEE

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

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