Question about living with an ISTp

[felafel]

*this little piggy had roast beaf*

[Topaz]

I held back because it was addressed to Rocky. However, I must tell you felafel, Rocky is the one who wrote one of the descriptions. Also on many other post he has described in detail about how functions and other insights about his type. I wish I had the links right now but Im at work so I'd better get back to ..uh .. work :wink:

[Slacker]

I have experience with living with one and dealing with one but it would help to have more specific questions. What kind of tips? Attracting one? Living with one? Dealing with one in some other way?

[flower]

Im happy to answer any questions you have as best as I can, although rocky has a much better knowledge of socionics than I do.

[Gilly]

Living with an ISTp? Don't even try, unless a) You're a VERY patient ENFp, or b) you can drug him/her into somehow being less anal retentive.

[Rocky]

hey rocky, i've read the istp type descriptions, but i was wondering if you could give me some hints to that type based on your experince (of being one, that is
thanks kid
enfp

Hints? What kinds of hints? How to attract one? Keep it's attention?


One thing I can think of about ISTps is that most of them can seem distant or unapproachable when they really don't want to be. Expressiong what they think and feel is not their strong point. I have found that it seems like a lot of people are almost intimidated to approach/talk to an ISTp, which can be somewhat frustrating.

[Reuben]

Hey guys. I'm new here. ISTp and all. I'll try to answer your question by giving you the state of mind I'm in now. I feel nervous, excited, slightly neurotic ^.- nervous because I'm afraid of how I'll portray myself, excited because I'd like to know your reaction to my nakedness (yes I feel naked telling you all this), and neurotic because I'm tripping the wire in order for you all to hear this from me. And also because it's late at night and I'm supposed to be sleeping ISTps are spotted with a detachment, usually with either a dazed off look on their face (day dreaming again) or a contented smile (another weird joke) or expressionless; when that particular ISTp is found in an uncomfortable location where social pressure and expectation is pressed onto him, the logical reaction is to not give a clue about the condition of his emotional state, because if he does, he fears planes hijacking it. Ok he's just terrified of getting caught with his emotions hanging lose on a sleeve. To attract an ISTp have a dreamy look on your face. ENFp's do it naturally I guess because of their EN and stuff, I don't know. But EN is our dual seeking function and we unconsciously seek for it. How cheesy but true, I have a fetish for ENFp's with dreamy looks (as in they look at you but somehow see through you, looking as if they are not really focusing). Anyway, the point is that it looks as if you have a need for their strong IntroSensing (I know this is warped logic but). ISTp's like to feel being needed. Am I needed? (please say yes please say yes please say yes) Another thing, they hate being rejected. If you follow the earlier threads most of you here should be familiar with that by now. Heh. And ISTp's love you. As in if they do love you, they love you. Like, really fall in really really love you. Multiply that by a million times. When they actually love someone they fall deep. Honestly I don't know if that's ISTp behaviour, but that's me. And I'm ISTp. So I figured that probably .... nevermind. So if you want to know if they love you, pay attention to their actions and stuff... don't rush 'em, once they've warmed up to you long enough they may finally gather up the courage to say 'I love you.' I guess that's an honour hearing it from an ISTp. Any more question? I'll be happy to answer them. Oh and sorry for not being to the point ^.- to all you ENFp's out there, to attract and ISTp, just be yourself. That's what duals are for, goodnight all. *snoozes off*

[Kim]

Living with an ISTp? Don't even try, unless a) You're a VERY patient ENFp, or b) you can drug him/her into somehow being less anal retentive.

Actually, my ISTp (who I lived with) was so messy, it drove me nuts! He called my anal retentive (I'm really not). And yes, I'm sure he is ISTp because the only other option would be INTp - NO!

[Slacker]

My husband likes things to be reasonably neat, but he isn't anal retentive. I suppose all types can take their particular things to extremes.

I agree that ISTps need to feel needed. My husband beams when I come to some situation where I need his help.

I think as far as recognizing them goes, maybe look for someone with some kind of skill. My husband likes to work on cars, and an ISTp friend sews quilts. I think ISTps generally have some area like that where they really excel. If you are impressed by their skill they will respond very favorably. My husband is very talented but is unsure of himself and will always point out areas where he thinks he could have done better and loves it when I tell him I'm impressed with his work. And my friend will show me a quilting project and apologize for some imagined fault, and again loves it when I tell her how great the quilt looks. So maybe look for someone who has a great skill in some area but is unsure of that skill.

People who don't know my husband well think he's always cranky or emotionless or something - his face shows no expression. My friend's face doesn't show much emotion either. So if you find someone who has a skill, seems unsure of that skill, and whose face doesn't show emotion, that person might be an ISTp.

I had my friend take the test a few days ago and wasn't suprised when she came up as ISTp. I think her husband is an ENFp too. He works with my husband.

[Topaz]

Thanks for your post Blueblade. If theres and istp out there that loves me like that, I hope I find out Im super grateful and happy to recieve help from an istp though I restrain some of my feelings about so's I wont scare them off. For some reason the istps I know can gripe and moan about all kinds of stuff but I seldom get annoyed with them. Its kind of funny actually. I used to tease this one buddy of mine, who was extremely picky about everything. Whenever we went out to eat he would get served last Then there was always something wrong with his food. I was like "Dude youre never satisfied huh?" and he's like "NO." I felt bad for him cause I was as happy as a clam. I'll eat just about anything. (well not anything but you know what I mean) I think some of his gripe was just bluff though, maybe just to hold my attention .

[Rocky]

Do other ISTps on here have trouble "turning their brain off" at night?

If you started thinking about stuff, would you find trouble sleeping?



/like I am right now :/

[Creepy-]

I dont get it. Your post says Friday at 3:29am but Im in California and I know that NY is only 3 hours ahead of us so howcum it says 3:29?
And what time will it say on this post? Inquiring minds want to know. :wink:

[Creepy-]

I dont get it. Your post says Friday at 3:29am but Im in California and I know that NY is only 3 hours ahead of us so howcum it says 3:29?
And what time will it say on this post? Inquiring minds want to know. :wink:

5:36! What the.... OK could someone who knows explain this to me. Is this Russian time we're going by?

[Reuben]

To Nicky:

'Bout the unsure of talents part, I guess most ISTp's aren't sure about how people percieve or feel for their talents, and they need reasurance. It's usually for reasurrance that they point out places which they could be better or their mistakes or their faults. When you affirm that is good and if he senses your sincerity which is most most utmost important, he'll feel really happy. Yeah.

To NFP:

It depends on who I'm with. As an introvert I naturally do not relate to people like that. I relate to myself like that. As in I relate to myself like that but I only see pictures and images (and sometimes hear a few words that sound nice... I like poetry), so if there were words for my pictures and images it would be probably how I speak them online. My mouth is unable to catch up with my brain and my heart is currently unable to have the emotional capacity to hold whatever impression anyone will have on me if I start talking like that in real life. ISTp's love to be online. Ok sorry for that, maybe it's just me. But typing stuff out is like opening a valve to our mind. Sometimes we want the world to see what's inside, and sometimes we need to release the pressure of built up thoughts and ideas. In real life, my conversations are usually very punctuated. I relate through joking, and short moments of conversation. Most of the time a few hours later I'd suddenly remember the situation and wished I'd said something better, which usually occurs to me immediately after speaking the short punctuated maximum efficiency lines which were barely needed to answer the question asked/continue the conversation/generate interest. That's why writing plays are much easier; the characters have prepared lines, and none will have to come back when the curtains are down to change them to something better, that would have impressed people more. ISTp's or XSXP's like making impressions on other people, but for the ISTps it's more of through a prepared work. A talent excelled at. A skill mastered. A beauty to show the world. We were not born with the natural psyche to say what we'd like to say the way we'd like to say it. But we're talented. I'm happy for that.

Some unrelated stuff:
An ENFp just gave me a muffin today I'm so happy! And it tastes good too, I never really liked muffins except that from Kenny Rogers, but this one is good.

[flower]

Do other ISTps on here have trouble "turning their brain off" at night?

If you started thinking about stuff, would you find trouble sleeping?

Yeah, definitely, I can be a bit of an insomnic sometimes, often takes me a long time to get to sleep. I used to put a pen and paper by my bed so that when I started thinking of stuff I could write it down, this helped me forget about it so I could sleep. I could then see what I was thinking about the next day.

Living with an ISTp? Don't even try, unless a) You're a VERY patient ENFp, or b) you can drug him/her into somehow being less anal retentive

Im certain im not anal retentive, and have never been accused of it by others I have lived with. The things I will say are respect and allow us our private space, we need quite a lot of time alone, and on a regular basis, and I mean alone, not in the same room as someone but not talking. Also treat our stuff well, we can have a lot on emotional attachment to some of our possesions that remind us of something or represent something (). If you do these things we get on well with just about anyone.

'Bout the unsure of talents part, I guess most ISTp's aren't sure about how people percieve or feel for their talents, and they need reasurance. It's usually for reasurrance that they point out places which they could be better or their mistakes or their faults. When you affirm that is good and if he senses your sincerity which is most most utmost important, he'll feel really happy. Yeah.

I agree completely. All types like to feel needed, I think it's less about that and more about reasurrance about our skills or indeed reasurance about how you like us. We just find it difficult to know what others think of us and our skills. Want to make an ISTp real happy, tell them you like them and value you friendship with them, and reasure them about there talents. ENFp's are very good at doing this :wink:

[flower]

Hmm, just thinking:

I think we are always just a little unsure about how others percieve us, and what they think about us. This is where the reasurance thing comes from. but also why we need to know people for a long time before we can really trust and confide in someone, and also why we find it hard to initiate intimate relationships (and to a lesser extent friendships).

Any ISTp's agree/disagree?

[Reuben]

1. How do you deal with frustration? Or rather, do you feel you retain a lot of feelings, thoughts etc undiscerned and then...act a bit strange under frustration? When i say strange, i mean....perhaps act as a victim fearing sth or other. Or start attacking under panic of sth or other....while not being quite sure where exactly you have to direct that emotion at?

Er I find it personally hard to understand the victim fearing something or another part do you mean like a schizophrenic fearing percieved agressors only that for an ISTp it is real people or something? I guess I feel scared when I'm in a crowd of people whom I do not feel comfortable with. I remember having dinner with some people whom I know but somehow...do not feel comfortable with them. I would have prefered being one on one with them (yeah in my dreams) but one WHOLE table full of people you've only been with for a short time? I remember feeling really scared and sweaty palms and highstrung heart and all. It was really uncomfortable; I felt like a leopard without his spots (rather stripped of his spots): out of place and out of character. My behaviour was very shy and normal. Though if someone looked close enough I believe he could see the cold fear in my heart. 0.o Anyway about the behaving strange due to frustration part, I don't think so. For me anyway. Maybe it's with who you live with, I live with an INFj brother, an ISFp father and probably an ESTj mother. My brother and father helped to bring out the F in me. My mother helped bring out the E in me. That's so cool. It's like one whole family to develop you (I wished for an ENFp but then my future partner may remind of a family member and that's way too freaky haha). As a result I am quite conscious of my feelings and know how to direct them in a civil manner. Sometimes I act retarded. I don't know I think it's my fathers influence gone wild in me. Haha. Or maybe it's just ISTp. Or maybe it's just delta No I don't go around attacking people for no reason. But I guess your question is specific...as in different people with different personality and upbringing are different even though they are all ISTp, yeah that's all.

2. DO you friends tend to be people you have known for...forever? Do you tend to be VERY close with these old friends? Do you HIGHLY value their opinion etc?

I'm too young to say that I'm very close with my old friends. I don't really have any old friends. Most of them are from school, some from church but they're not really friends for most years. I was too shy for about 3 quarters of my life. Probably more. I guess it's the detachment that makes me a not-very-close-friends type of person. I can't really name a best friend. Yeah. But I constantly seek to want to know people, to understand people, and to find someone whom I can pour myself out to. Is this ISTp behaviour? One influeced by hidden agenda? I guess so. Haha. But I do have people whom I hang out with about all the time. They've known me for ... forever. One of them is my bro. Yeah. That's about all. I hang out with some friends from school, they don't really know me too well but some do including an ENFj who's apparently a conflicting partner according to the socionics website. I have a benefactor INTj who isn't really a benefactor...he doesn't make me want to go all swell on him and all. That's about the closest I can recall for now. Yeah.

3. What frustrates you most in relations with people? Do you perceive other people as passive agressive when they don't tell you RIGHT AWAY if sth's wrong or mildly unpleasant...and perhaps keep a sort of a distance at first unwilling to speak right away?

You. Haha just joking <-------[After looking back I feel a tendency to remove this part. It's just too lame] Honestly what frustrates me most the inability to know for sure, definitely, with confidence what the other person is feeling. There is always a possibility that they may be feeling something else. To my perception that is. And so at first I have a feeling. She's feeling sad! Then another feeling says, Are you sure? Then I say, You all are confusing me, ARGH! And then I get frustrated For this particular incident I got it right. I asked her, You're feeling sad. (I know that's more like a statement but.) And she asked me, How did you know? Haha. It's like the whole world inately knows that I'm bad at knowing feelings. I wished people had placards saying "HEY GUYS I'M FEELING *inserts a generic feeling, with more elaborations below* RIGHT NOW!". I guess that's how people in general is like to the INFj, they read people don't they? *wink* Haha. And no I do not find people passively aggressive for hiding their feelings of something-wrongness, I have no right to ask for placards with their feelings pasted on it. But I guess I'll keep my distance for awhile. Opening my mouth feels awkward for me unless the person I'm speaking to is DEFINITELY a person whom want to speak to me. The definite part still makes me pout. I can never really know..................bah.

4. WHen are you (as an istp ) most likely to need reassurance? In conflict situations? or other...?

This question is easy. Almost all the time. We need to be reassured that you (people in general) want to talk to us. That you love us, that you find us socially acceptable for who we are, that we are lovely people even though we're full of faults like people are. Uh no you don't have to say that all the time, we'll see through your facial expression, your tone of voice (sometimes we hear it even over the internet), your physical reaction to us and whatever we say. And of course if you see an ISTp depressed, affirm your feelings for him/her strongly. A depressed ISTp may think the world hates him. How horrible. An ISTp feeling down about his talents or unsure of them should be encouraged as well. And what conflict situations? As in relationships, or decisions, or career or ...? The key is reassurance in the aspect of feelings and societal perception of him. Because that's an ISTp's weakness.

That was long.[/b]

[Reuben]

1. How do you deal with frustration? Or rather, do you feel you retain a lot of feelings, thoughts etc undiscerned and then...act a bit strange under frustration? When i say strange, i mean....perhaps act as a victim fearing sth or other. Or start attacking under panic of sth or other....while not being quite sure where exactly you have to direct that emotion at?

Er I find it personally hard to understand the victim fearing something or another part do you mean like a schizophrenic fearing percieved agressors only that for an ISTp it is real people or something? I guess I feel scared when I'm in a crowd of people whom I do not feel comfortable with. I remember having dinner with some people whom I know but somehow...do not feel comfortable with them. I would have prefered being one on one with them (yeah in my dreams) but one WHOLE table full of people you've only been with for a short time? I remember feeling really scared and sweaty palms and highstrung heart and all. It was really uncomfortable; I felt like a leopard without his spots (rather stripped of his spots): out of place and out of character. My behaviour was very shy and normal. Though if someone looked close enough I believe he could see the cold fear in my heart. 0.o Anyway about the behaving strange due to frustration part, I don't think so. For me anyway. Maybe it's with who you live with, I live with an INFj brother, an ISFp father and probably an ESTj mother. My brother and father helped to bring out the F in me. My mother helped bring out the E in me. That's so cool. It's like one whole family to develop you (I wished for an ENFp but then my future partner may remind of a family member and that's way too freaky haha). As a result I am quite conscious of my feelings and know how to direct them in a civil manner. Sometimes I act retarded. I don't know I think it's my fathers influence gone wild in me. Haha. Or maybe it's just ISTp. Or maybe it's just delta No I don't go around attacking people for no reason. But I guess your question is specific...as in different people with different personality and upbringing are different even though they are all ISTp, yeah that's all.

2. DO you friends tend to be people you have known for...forever? Do you tend to be VERY close with these old friends? Do you HIGHLY value their opinion etc?

I'm too young to say that I'm very close with my old friends. I don't really have any old friends. Most of them are from school, some from church but they're not really friends for most years. I was too shy for about 3 quarters of my life. Probably more. I guess it's the detachment that makes me a not-very-close-friends type of person. I can't really name a best friend. Yeah. But I constantly seek to want to know people, to understand people, and to find someone whom I can pour myself out to. Is this ISTp behaviour? One influeced by hidden agenda? I guess so. Haha. But I do have people whom I hang out with about all the time. They've known me for ... forever. One of them is my bro. Yeah. That's about all. I hang out with some friends from school, they don't really know me too well but some do including an ENFj who's apparently a conflicting partner according to the socionics website. I have a benefactor INTj who isn't really a benefactor...he doesn't make me want to go all swell on him and all. That's about the closest I can recall for now. Yeah.

3. What frustrates you most in relations with people? Do you perceive other people as passive agressive when they don't tell you RIGHT AWAY if sth's wrong or mildly unpleasant...and perhaps keep a sort of a distance at first unwilling to speak right away?

You. Haha just joking <-------[After looking back I feel a tendency to remove this part. It's just too lame] Honestly what frustrates me most the inability to know for sure, definitely, with confidence what the other person is feeling. There is always a possibility that they may be feeling something else. To my perception that is. And so at first I have a feeling. She's feeling sad! Then another feeling says, Are you sure? Then I say, You all are confusing me, ARGH! And then I get frustrated For this particular incident I got it right. I asked her, You're feeling sad. (I know that's more like a statement but.) And she asked me, How did you know? Haha. It's like the whole world inately knows that I'm bad at knowing feelings. I wished people had placards saying "HEY GUYS I'M FEELING *inserts a generic feeling, with more elaborations below* RIGHT NOW!". I guess that's how people in general is like to the INFj, they read people don't they? *wink* Haha. And no I do not find people passively aggressive for hiding their feelings of something-wrongness, I have no right to ask for placards with their feelings pasted on it. But I guess I'll keep my distance for awhile. Opening my mouth feels awkward for me unless the person I'm speaking to is DEFINITELY a person whom want to speak to me. The definite part still makes me pout. I can never really know..................bah.

4. WHen are you (as an istp ) most likely to need reassurance? In conflict situations? or other...?

This question is easy. Almost all the time. We need to be reassured that you (people in general) want to talk to us. That you love us, that you find us socially acceptable for who we are, that we are lovely people even though we're full of faults like people are. Uh no you don't have to say that all the time, we'll see through your facial expression, your tone of voice (sometimes we hear it even over the internet), your physical reaction to us and whatever we say. And of course if you see an ISTp depressed, affirm your feelings for him/her strongly. A depressed ISTp may think the world hates him. How horrible. An ISTp feeling down about his talents or unsure of them should be encouraged as well. And what conflict situations? As in relationships, or decisions, or career or ...? The key is reassurance in the aspect of feelings and societal perception of him. Because that's an ISTp's weakness.

That was long.

[Reuben]

Nuuuuuuuuu!

I double posted.

Because I saw the [/b] at the bottom and thought the whole thing would be bold and so I stopped it by clicking the big red x on the tool bar but it sent already! I would like a cat and a hamster and a dog for a friend. I think animals are cute.

[Creepy-]

wow! this last reply was great! ...and long But, booo..i'm doubting i even know any istps at this point...and perhaps the person i was thinking of might not be an istp.....If that kid is an intp...trouble likes me then...

anyone else who feels like giving this another shot?

[Reuben]

wow! this last reply was great! ...and long

Haha thanks for that reassurace. Lol. It took you 3 minutes to read all that and post, according to the time above that post.

THAT MEANS YOU READ AT AT LEAST 5 WORDS PER MINUTE! That's fast haha. You haven't met any ISTp's? Maybe they're rare? Haha. I've heard INFp's are rare too. I've just met one. Like two weird rarities coming together. To play the piano. That was like the moment of my life I've always wanted to meet an INFp haha.

[mimisor]

hey rocky, i've read the istp type descriptions, but i was wondering if you could give me some hints to that type based on your experince (of being one, that is
thanks kid
enfp

If you are acquainted with a creature on this forum named Kreatuv, she is a typical ISTp, altough she denies it. But she does not fool me. Here's where it's been discussed her type http://the16types.info/forums/viewtopic.php?t=1786

I can see how is she betraying her real type. It's obvious that she's just mocking us and the whole socionics thing!!! + she's obvious a practical, down-to-earth person, hard to convince of of this theory. Now I'd like to hear the opinions of the ISTps here, if they agree with me, if you can understand her attitude :wink:


So you want to know how can you recognize an ISTp in the crowd. As far as my observations go, it seems they are well-built and stubby, and by this I don't mean fat, just give the impression, because they are compact in a way, umm...well-knit people I mean. They are also short in height, but not necessarily, rather compact like I just said. In this way our dear friend, Kreatuv, is a perfect example. Ahh, but now I see she deleted the pics, but there's still one left Haha.

[Creepy-]

So you want to know how can you recognize an ISTp in the crowd. As far as my observations go, it seems they are well-built and stubby, and by this I don't mean fat, just give the impression, because they are compact in a way, umm...well-knit people I mean. They are also short in height, but not necessarily, rather compact like I just said.

Bullshit, 6 foot 3 skinny lanky ISTp here :wink: .

[mimisor]

Like I said, it's from my observations, I don't believe these things can be generalized, because there will always be exceptions, but generally there is a tendency, certain types are associated with certain body characteristics and ISTps are supposed to be the short and agile person

[mimisor]

ok, take for example Eminem, he looks like a kiddo, I don't know if he has more than 1,70 m in height, on different sites I've looked up it says different. According to Rocky's thread concerning Em's type, it seems he is indeed an ISTp http://the16types.info/forums/viewtopic.php?t=1556

for demonstration, how an ISTp looks like, hihi