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Thread: Romancing Styles / Erotic Attitudes

  1. #121
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    Quote Originally Posted by Waddlesworth View Post
    I'm very afraid of being hurt. So much that I have extreme difficulties in making the first move because I'm not sure if I REALLY am reading the person's intentions or not. I think this lets girls think that they can get away with more around me and not expect anything and then "BAM!" just when i give it a shot, my worst fears come true "EW, GET OFF OF ME YOU FREAK!" it never happened but i'm worried it will. but then again, why would she be so close if she thought i was a freak... alright, next time she does the "lay next to" baby talk im goin' in for the kill! well, the love. you get the idea.

    but once the wheels are in motion i'm very sexually demanding and every morning turns into a sex fest for me. I can get very annoying I'm sure.

    "What, you don't want to love me? you don't want to express in the flesh your bodily love for me? why? am I ugly? you find me unnattractive? Obviously i'm not turning you on so it must be true. Well, i guess not, but still... well... not even a handjob? if you loved me you'd give me a handjob... THEN I'd shutup. if you don't give me a handjob you must think I'm gross because you will only gain by giving me one. I'll stop complaining, feel happy, AND be my normal self again. isn't that what you want? I promise I'll be quick. Maybe it'll even turn you on a little, then i promise i'll return the favor."


    I've learned my lesson and probably wont do that anymore.
    This grossed me out immensely. I thought i was going to learn something so i kept reading. Nope.
    Are you by any chance an si valuer? Just a blind walk off a cliff (i mean blind guess)

  2. #122
    carrina's Avatar
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    "Victim
    - Can project either a submissive or arrogant view of themselves
    - The openly submissive version never questions the partners
    control but expects the partner to "show the way" in all aspects"
    I've found this to be extremely true. EIEs can be arrogant assholes "I'm not weak, I'm dominant" (lol) and then you have EIEs are way too ready to be controlled.
    You have LIEs who think they're god's hilarious gift to women, can't be held down or domesticated (i'll admit it's not a horrible look for LIEs *grumble) and then you have LIEs that are more "broken in" (happens after a heart break, shit break up etc.) I've seen this variation referenced in literature that i would cite if i actually remembered it.
    I've never seen an IEI that didn't like being treated aggressively, the less you give a shit about how they react, the more positively they respond (sorry if i sound crude, just being honest). I'll admit that just because i haven't seen "assertive/doninant" iei's doesnt mean they don't exist. and i have no idea how ILIs are, but i can imagine any variation on the aggressive vs submissive pole/dichotomy. My past interaction isn't telling in that way, since back then i was really insecure. *Shrugs.
    Last edited by carrina; 06-05-2015 at 06:11 AM.

  3. #123
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    Quote Originally Posted by Typhon View Post
    I wonder if people can "switch".
    Haha lol. Yeah probably. *Context makes all the difference here.
    Last edited by carrina; 06-05-2015 at 05:59 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by XoX View Post
    I guess I'm not a victim Dirty talk tends to sound amusing to me or sometimes "hostile" although in very rare cases it works. I'm not sure about the baby-talk though...maybe if it was really genuine. Wrong kind of baby-talk works as badly as wrong kind of dirty talk
    Amusing + hostile. Hmm. * ponders. Yep sounds normal to me.

  5. #125
    carrina's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Herzy View Post
    Possibly. Since the descriptions are so simplified in the first place, it's pretty easy to be in another category than what you're supposed to be in.

    So yes, there are people that don't correspond.
    My thoughts exactly. *Cannot compute oversimplification

  6. #126
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    No ESTp has ever won a mental sparring with me. We go on and on and on and on and on louder and louder and louder.

    They might win job interwievs is if the interviewer is impressed by bullshit.
    ESTp's nvr pwn me ever cuz i know their dumb tricks. All they do is try to rapidly change their argument subtly and other b.s. b.s. radar too strong. SLEs are funny though.

  7. #127
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    Quote Originally Posted by CuriousSoul View Post
    ISFPs are perhaps the most openly nurturing type. The best choice if you are looking for a loving mother figure... If not - maybe you are not an ENTP. INFPs again - well they are a victim type. I cannot tell better since there is little intimate attraction.

    Also keep in mind that the whole "emo-culture" is unlikely behavior for the infantile types. The preference for the gentle touch is more often the kind of love that dare not speak its name.
    I don't even know what you just tried to communicate.

  8. #128
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy View Post
    One victim I talked to said that the SLE's aggression made him feel wanted. LSEs, by contrast, are less comfortable chasing someone who's sending mixed signals. They're happy to do all the work/initiate if they know it's what you want though.



    lol

    2006 Joy knew what was up before all those years of thinking LIE and SLE.
    Haha lol @ your edit.
    This is actually why i love and hate EIEs. The level of chasery is beyond my abilities re: "arrogant" pseudo's< Not applicable to the less "dominant" eie's.

  9. #129
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    Quote Originally Posted by carrina View Post
    You have LIEs who think they're god's hilarious gift to women, can't be held down or domesticated (i'll admit it's not a horrible look for LIEs *grumble) and then you have LIEs that are more "broken in" (happens after a heart break, shit break up etc.) I've seen this variation referenced in literature that i would cite if i actually remembered it.
    I have encountered both aspects in the same person. Well, that one person told me about their "broken in" phase. Though generally, I could see the LIE-Ni being more Victim and "soft" because of stronger Ni. LIE-Te would be much more in denial about their Victim-ness. (Similar to that would be EIE-Fe.)

    Quote Originally Posted by carrina View Post
    I've never seen an IEI that didn't like being treated aggressively, the less you give a shit about how they react, the more positively they respond (sorry if i sound crude, just being honest). I'll admit that just because i haven't seen "assertive/doninant" iei's doesnt mean they don't exist. and i have no idea how ILIs are, but i can imagine any variation on the aggressive vs submissive pole/dichotomy. My past interaction isn't telling in that way, since back then i was really insecure. *Shrugs.
    Hm, I do not mind being treated aggressively, but at some point I can flare up if it goes into a direction I dislike. I used to be in some kind of denial myself regarding being a "Victim". I would not deny the description itself, but I would have a sort of passive-aggressive attitude romantically. I still do at times. I can go into a pseudo-aggressor mode when I am feeling very confident, and energetically "stronger" than the other. But eventually, it only takes one little moment for me to realize how much of a "Victim" I am. I usually surrender much faster with an aggressor than with any other romance style (though it still takes quite a while). I experience the most resistance with Childlike types, I am likely to act very dismissive and hot-and-cold with them. I think me being the Ni subtype also moves me towards being more Pseudo-Aggressor. I can have that attitude of "Tame me if you can."
    Last edited by Olimpia; 06-05-2015 at 12:45 PM.

  10. #130
    The sleeping beauty Velvet's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SisOfNight View Post
    I can have that attitude of "Tame me if you can."
    This made me tick so much, I totally relate. The cookie comes after a lot of effort, and it's not necessarily in time but in intensity and means applied to win my interest. And the rest makes sense as well (for infantiles + attitude).

  11. #131
    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Velvet View Post
    This made me tick so much, I totally relate. The cookie comes after a lot of effort, and it's not necessarily in time but in intensity and means applied to win my interest. And the rest makes sense as well (for infantiles + attitude).
    tame? that would suggest a animal like person. Why not just enjoy the person? ok so I can understand presenting a difficult to get close to attitude as you may not trust people yet. However, it's still kind of too playful I think too much like the scene in "intolerable cruelty" movie with Katherine Zeta Jones where the reporter "nails" the cheating husband. lol
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 2w1sw(1w9) helps others to live up to their own standards of what a good person is and is very behind the scenes in the process.
    Tritype 1-2-6 stacking sp/sx


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    The sleeping beauty Velvet's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    tame? that would suggest a animal like person. Why not just enjoy the person? ok so I can understand presenting a difficult to get close to attitude as you may not trust people yet. However, it's still kind of too playful I think too much like the scene in "intolerable cruelty" movie with Katherine Zeta Jones where the reporter "nails" the cheating husband. lol
    Maybe I should watch the movie before replying anything as your comment seems all greek to me for the moment.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    tame? that would suggest a animal like person.
    People are animals. The se-ni quadras accept that lul

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    Quote Originally Posted by Velvet View Post
    This made me tick so much, I totally relate. The cookie comes after a lot of effort, and it's not necessarily in time but in intensity and means applied to win my interest. And the rest makes sense as well (for infantiles + attitude).
    LIEs aren't as hard to get as the beta psuedos but I've definitely seen this attitude. It's part of being a "trophy". The term is slightly degrading but it fits if you remove the popularly preferred term "trophy-wife" which has no resemblance to the meaning here

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    [QUOTE=SisOfNight;1091901]I have encountered both aspects in the same person. Well, that one person told me about their "broken in" phase. Though generally, I could see the LIE-Ni being more Victim and "soft" because of stronger Ni. LIE-Te would be much more in denial about their Victim-ness. (Similar to that would be EIE-Fe.)



    LIE-C and LIE-D are more dominant,
    LIE-H and N are less so.
    Yeah EIE-E is very dominant as a matter of pride and EIE ni is inherently submissive in my experience.

  16. #136
    The Evening and the Morning Star Eudaimonia's Avatar
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    I feel like the romance styles theory causes more confusion and stereotypes than producing any actual understanding or explanation.

    I still like to use them, but they almost exist as a separate type system.

    Agressor types sound very male bro type.

    Victims sound like "shit testers".

    Infantiles basically sound exactly as they're named.

    Caregivers sound like a mommy or daddy type.

    I think one person could be all of these in a relationship depending on the situation and mood.

    There is some truth to this theory though I think it just needs to be modified by someone.

    Ni types can seem victimish because they are in their head more than out of it but still value a Se "aggressor" to shake them out of their dreamy stupor.

    Ne types can seem childish because of their precocious imaginative nature and value a Si "caregiver" to keep their feet on the ground.
    With mind distracted, never thinking, "Death is coming,"
    To slave away on the pointless business of mundane life,
    And then to come out empty--it is a tragic error.
    ENFJ | EIE-Fe | WELP | 3w4 sx/so

  17. #137

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    Quote Originally Posted by D E M O N View Post
    I feel like the romance styles theory causes more confusion and stereotypes than producing any actual understanding or explanation.

    I still like to use them, but they almost exist as a separate type system.

    Agressor types sound very male bro type.

    Victims sound like "shit testers".

    Infantiles basically sound exactly as they're named.

    Caregivers sound like a mommy or daddy type.

    I think one person could be all of these in a relationship depending on the situation and mood.

    There is some truth to this theory though I think it just needs to be modified by someone.

    Ni types can seem victimish because they are in their head more than out of it but still value a Se "aggressor" to shake them out of their dreamy stupor.

    Ne types can seem childish because of their precocious imaginative nature and value a Si "caregiver" to keep their feet on the ground.
    It's old, but I did find this blog entry interesting:
    https://www.the16types.info/vbulleti...ays-every-role
    Can be seen as similar to what you're going at, maybe.

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