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Thread: SEI-ILE duality relations discussion, stories and examples (ENTp and ISFp)

  1. #201
    IQ over 150 vesstheastralsilky's Avatar
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    Some stories are too good to tell. <3 <3 <3
    ~* astralsilky



    Each essence is a separate glass,
    Through which Sun of Being’s Light is passed,
    Each tinted fragment sparkles with the Sun,
    A thousand colors, but the Light is One.

    Jami, 15th c. Persian Poet


    Post types & fully individuated before 2012 ...

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    My ILE friend is staying at my house for a few months. He is up till the middle of the night talking non stop with my SEI roommate, who is my cousin, who has shared information with the ILE that he hasn't even shared with me lol.

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    ILE friend and SEI cousin have consistently stayed up in the middle of the night yapping away lol. And when I asked my ILE friend what they talk about he tells me "It's confidential." They have secrets between each other even though ILE is my friend and SEI is my cousin lol. They are yapping in the other room as I type this. ILE also has told me my SEI cousin he finds more social and cooler than myself, I am EII so perhaps he's talking about Fe, idk but I can't help be hear "mus tbe duality" in my mind lol

    I'm suspecting Semi duality is more appealing than activity, my SLI friend tends to talk more and get more excitable when he talks to my ILE friend.

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    My ILE friend goes to a concert with my SEI cousin without me -_- lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Pixel View Post
    My ILE friend goes to a concert with my SEI cousin without me -_- lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by vesstheastralsilky View Post
    Some stories are too good to tell. <3 <3 <3
    Such a tease...

    “My typology is . . . not in any sense to stick labels on people at first sight. It is not a physiognomy and not an anthropological system, but a critical psychology dealing with the organization and delimitation of psychic processes that can be shown to be typical.”​ —C.G. Jung
     
    YWIMW

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    My friend has stayed with me for a month and a half now and evry night he's up yapping away till 4am with my SEI cousin. This duality is not in my favor right now.

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    A huge topic of discussion between my cousin SEI and friend ILE is SEI telling ILE all about how to lose weight and talk to girls and best songs to listen to.

    And it gets very weird when I walk in the room because they both tend to get quiet.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Pixel View Post
    A huge topic of discussion between my cousin SEI and friend ILE is SEI telling ILE all about how to lose weight and talk to girls and best songs to listen to.

    And it gets very weird when I walk in the room because they both tend to get quiet.
    Maybe you should start knocking before entering.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    Maybe you should start knocking before entering.
    What? It's my house lol.

    oh wait I get it now lol. Ni jokes.
    Last edited by Lord Pixel; 04-08-2019 at 05:07 AM.

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    I notice that in supervisor relations the supervisee suggestive function relies alot on the supervisors mobilizing functions and it can cause stress to be relied upon your 2d function.

    With an SEE friend of mind I relied on his Te quite a bit and I could hear frustration in his voice when I requested too much Te help, like he wanted me to figure it out on my owna nd leave him alone lol.

    With ILE I notice through out the day he asks me many questions about the details of a thing.

    "What song is this? Who sings it?"

    "What was the name of that place we went to? What day did we go there?"

    I find my self constantly saying "I don't know." because he is asking me such specific details about things I don't really pay attention to or that don't stick in my memory. I get a little frustrated with how specific the questions are and shocked that he even expects me to remember such details that I don't even pay attention to.

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    What's the purpose of SEI? Tallmo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Pixel View Post
    With ILE I notice through out the day he asks me many questions about the details of a thing.

    "What song is this? Who sings it?"

    "What was the name of that place we went to? What day did we go there?"

    I find my self constantly saying "I don't know." because he is asking me such specific details about things I don't really pay attention to or that don't stick in my memory. I get a little frustrated with how specific the questions are and shocked that he even expects me to remember such details that I don't even pay attention to.
    This sounds more like suggestive Te though. It's not Si anyway.
    The decisive thing is not the reality of the object, but the reality of the subjective factor, i.e. the primordial images, which in their totality represent a psychic mirror-world. It is a mirror, however, with the peculiar capacity of representing the present contents of consciousness not in their known and customary form but in a certain sense sub specie aeternitatis, somewhat as a million-year old consciousness might see them.

    (Jung on Si)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallmo View Post
    This sounds more like suggestive Te though. It's not Si anyway.
    Why because they are seeking information?

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    What's the purpose of SEI? Tallmo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Pixel View Post
    Why because they are seeking information?
    From my experience with ESIs. Did you mean that this could be suggestive Si in ILE? ILEs are looking for a comfortable accepting athmosphere just enjoying the moment. Being rooted in the experience. Si is not details in the way you described but I am not sure I understood you correctly. Si is about impressions like the space you are in or a cup of coffee.
    The decisive thing is not the reality of the object, but the reality of the subjective factor, i.e. the primordial images, which in their totality represent a psychic mirror-world. It is a mirror, however, with the peculiar capacity of representing the present contents of consciousness not in their known and customary form but in a certain sense sub specie aeternitatis, somewhat as a million-year old consciousness might see them.

    (Jung on Si)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallmo View Post
    From my experience with ESIs. Did you mean that this could be suggestive Si in ILE? ILEs are looking for a comfortable accepting athmosphere just enjoying the moment. Being rooted in the experience. Si is not details in the way you described but I am not sure I understood you correctly. Si is about impressions like the space you are in or a cup of coffee.
    Ah, yea I meant suggestive Si in ILE. My ILE friend constantly expects me to memorize or know little details about things that I just don't remember or know, I figured it was Si seeking since he seems to be asking me about details. He also constantly expects me to remember things since he can't seem to remember much, it's so bad that he has to cut people off in conversation to say what he wants to say because if he doesn't say it fast enough he will forget because his mind has traveled on to the next thinglol.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Pixel View Post
    Ah, yea I meant suggestive Si in ILE. My ILE friend constantly expects me to memorize or know little details about things that I just don't remember or know, I figured it was Si seeking since he seems to be asking me about details. He also constantly expects me to remember things since he can't seem to remember much, it's so bad that he has to cut people off in conversation to say what he wants to say because if he doesn't say it fast enough he will forget because his mind has traveled on to the next thinglol.
    A bit of attention deficit here as well?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Finaplex View Post
    A bit of attention deficit here as well?
    Perhaps. I imagine many Ne types get misdiagnosed tho.

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    What's the purpose of SEI? Tallmo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Pixel View Post
    Ah, yea I meant suggestive Si in ILE. My ILE friend constantly expects me to memorize or know little details about things that I just don't remember or know, I figured it was Si seeking since he seems to be asking me about details. He also constantly expects me to remember things since he can't seem to remember much, it's so bad that he has to cut people off in conversation to say what he wants to say because if he doesn't say it fast enough he will forget because his mind has traveled on to the next thinglol.
    Ok. Si can be "details" when focused but its always pure experience, never names or facts. So it can be the sensation of some fabric or piece of wood or the feeling of applying pressure when using some tool
    The decisive thing is not the reality of the object, but the reality of the subjective factor, i.e. the primordial images, which in their totality represent a psychic mirror-world. It is a mirror, however, with the peculiar capacity of representing the present contents of consciousness not in their known and customary form but in a certain sense sub specie aeternitatis, somewhat as a million-year old consciousness might see them.

    (Jung on Si)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Pixel View Post
    I notice that in supervisor relations the supervisee suggestive function relies alot on the supervisors mobilizing functions and it can cause stress to be relied upon your 2d function.

    With an SEE friend of mind I relied on his Te quite a bit and I could hear frustration in his voice when I requested too much Te help, like he wanted me to figure it out on my owna nd leave him alone lol.

    With ILE I notice through out the day he asks me many questions about the details of a thing.

    "What song is this? Who sings it?"

    "What was the name of that place we went to? What day did we go there?"

    I find my self constantly saying "I don't know." because he is asking me such specific details about things I don't really pay attention to or that don't stick in my memory. I get a little frustrated with how specific the questions are and shocked that he even expects me to remember such details that I don't even pay attention to.
    I think Gulenko called SEIs the "cultural storehouse" at some point, in that they naturally accumulate cultural/social information, bits of info about books, music, art, history, and literature, and this provides reference points to the ILE. It's interesting but ILEs never request this kind of info from me, which kind of gives weight to the idea that supervisees mistake supervisors for their duals, but not mirage partners.

    I've noticed the same thing around ESEs. Whenever we're out I basically have to Ti for both of us, however, the mobilizing function is subconscious and not really that reliable, so then it starts feeling uncomfortable when someone is repeatedly requesting something that you cannot even consciously access yourself.

    I've also heard an EII girl comment how her ILE boyfriend stresses out her Si, and it's also happened with my EII grandmother and ILE grandfather on an occasion. This mobilizing function stress is one of the reasons that supervisors get snappy at their supervisees. She would cook dinner sometimes, and he would come home, walk up to the stove, and eat food directly from the pot or the pan, and she would get mad at him for not getting a plate and sitting at the table to eat. His approach to eating was too simple and informal for her. An SEI in her place would already be serving the table, but her 2D Si would often stop short at preparing the food, so when my ILE grandfather would get home hungry - and ILEs often forget to eat during the day - he would go for the food directly and then my EII grandmother would be upset with him. My SEI-Si mother does preemptive caring where she will do everything from A to Z herself, and I can see how that would be optimal conditions for an ILE especially the Ne sub, whereas the 2D Si of EII continues to fall short causing frustration for the EII. The supervisee actually doesn't feel it as much until the frustrated supervisor snaps at them, and the supervisee has no idea why the supervisor is upset all of a sudden.

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    Quote Originally Posted by silke View Post
    I think Gulenko called SEIs the "cultural storehouse" at some point, in that they naturally accumulate cultural/social information, bits of info about books, music, art, history, and literature, and this provides reference points to the ILE. It's interesting but ILEs never request this kind of info from me, which kind of gives weight to the idea that supervisees mistake supervisors for their duals, but not mirage partners.

    I've noticed the same thing around ESEs. Whenever we're out I basically have to Ti for both of us, however, the mobilizing function is subconscious and not really that reliable, so then it starts feeling uncomfortable when someone is repeatedly requesting something that you cannot even consciously access yourself.

    I've also heard an EII girl comment how her ILE boyfriend stresses out her Si, and it's also happened with my EII grandmother and ILE grandfather on an occasion. This mobilizing function stress is one of the reasons that supervisors get snappy at their supervisees. She would cook dinner sometimes, and he would come home, walk up to the stove, and eat food directly from the pot or the pan, and she would get mad at him for not getting a plate and sitting at the table to eat. His approach to eating was too simple and informal for her. An SEI in her place would already be serving the table, but her 2D Si would often stop short at preparing the food, so when my ILE grandfather would get home hungry - and ILEs often forget to eat during the day - he would go for the food directly and then my EII grandmother would be upset with him. My SEI-Si mother does preemptive caring where she will do everything from A to Z herself, and I can see how that would be optimal conditions for an ILE especially the Ne sub, whereas the 2D Si of EII continues to fall short causing frustration for the EII. The supervisee actually doesn't feel it as much until the frustrated supervisor snaps at them, and the supervisee has no idea why the supervisor is upset all of a sudden.

    Yup yup yup. Especially the bold.

    I get frustrated when ILE friend comes into my kitchen and opens up every cabinet and leaves them all open lol. I would also get upset at the eating out of the pan, I guess it's the whole, that's now what you are supposed to do.

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    What's the purpose of SEI? Tallmo's Avatar
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    there is also the opposite phenomenon where the supervisee gets upset with the supervisor because he feels he cant be himself so he tries to liberate himself them the impact . The supervisor naturally has no idea why supervisee reacts this way.
    The decisive thing is not the reality of the object, but the reality of the subjective factor, i.e. the primordial images, which in their totality represent a psychic mirror-world. It is a mirror, however, with the peculiar capacity of representing the present contents of consciousness not in their known and customary form but in a certain sense sub specie aeternitatis, somewhat as a million-year old consciousness might see them.

    (Jung on Si)

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    .
    Last edited by Multiply; 05-23-2022 at 03:16 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Doggy View Post
    I was with an ISFp for nearly four years (dated for 6 months prior), however, I messed that up. Instead of a 5,000-word essay on it, I'll just say it really was just like this http://www.socioniko.net/en/1.3.rels/dual-1p.html.
    .
    This

    When you have an ILE friend from Slovakia and they hardly know any English and are trying to communicate with you to get women that they are dating types and to understand mbti and typing...it can be hard to communicate with them affectively as an EII who is constantly trying to get them to slow down and focus
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    I have two ILE acquaintances with an SEI wife. In both relationships, both partners admire each other and think the other is brilliant. The ILE is generally the more public figure; the SEIs stay in the background -- possibly coincidence, possibly a personality development that comes after being married to an ILE, but nobody ever sees them unless the ILE brings them along somewhere and points them out. In large gatherings they tend to separate, which I think is odd, and where the SEIs go I have no idea.

    This description may be a little too specific to these couples though.

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    Tom Waits is ILE. I'm going to take a wild guess and say that John Baldessari is SEI.


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    I love SEIs, and I have a lot of respect for them.

    How relationships (friendships, etc.) typically work is like this:

    ILEs Appreciate:

    Appreciates the fact that the SEI is warm, welcoming, and explicitly creates an emotional atmosphere to engage with without being domineering (like ESEs can sometimes be).

    Appreciates the fact that the SEIs have a great sense of humour that pokes ever so gently at people.

    Appreciates the fact that SEIs enjoy performing "domestic" tasks (e.g., cooking, baking, home decorating) and are confident in their ability to do this.

    Appreciates the fact that SEIs do not take social faux pas too seriously, and are capable of laughing at themselves.

    Appreciates the fact that SEIs can take care of the more difficult-to-manuever social situations with tact and a calm disposition.

    Appreciates the SEIs stability in general.


    SEIs (from an ILEs perspective) Appreciate:

    Appreciates the ILEs sense of humour and ability to entertain them.

    Appreciates the ILEs willingness to hear them out and genuinely try and understand their point of view with patience.

    Appreciates the ILEs ability to "get things done" and the fact that they seem to just do this on their own.

    Appreciates the ILEs sense of adventure, love of life, and genuine happiness.

    Appreciates the ILEs strong sense of fairness and justice, and how they will stand up for the downtrodden (these are not uncommonly SEIs themselves)

    Appreciates the ILEs innate tendency to acknowledge the SEIs strengths, foster them, and always believe in them



    I actually think the ILE-SEI duality is one of the most common dualities to work and to last forever. Neither type takes themselves too seriously, both types are fun-loving and easy-going, both types are very adaptable, and both types can feel as though there is no "place" for them in a society that is heavily Gamma/Delta. The ILE-SEI pair is probably the most common pair you will find that openly mock the seriousness of these two quadras, rolling their eyes at both Fi (SEIs) and Te (ILEs); example below.

    ILE (him) and SEI (her) duality example. I think that they are both SO/SXs.


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    Haikus SGF's Avatar
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    @mightylizard lol that seems very accurate, weird. how do you know these things?
    Last edited by SGF; 06-29-2020 at 07:22 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by shotgunfingers View Post
    @mightylizard lol that seems very accurate, weird. how do you know these things?
    Just my own experience as an ILE. I also know a LOT of SEIs, as a lot of my cousins and aunts and uncles and friends are SEIs, so I have experienced a lot of close duality relationships and have just picked out the commonalities that seem to exist among all relationships I have with SEIs.

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    Ivan (ILE), Alina (SEI)

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  31. #231
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    Bump*

    The two biggest kids and one of the most zany duals IMO

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    Quote Originally Posted by MissDucki View Post
    Bump*

    The two biggest kids and one of the most zany duals IMO
    Yeah, it is totally unwise to tell us to grow up.
    MOTTO: NEVER TRUST IN REALITY
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    Sincerely yours,
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