Originally Posted by
eunice
My dad is an INTj and he totally drives me crazy. For instance, he doesn't give compliments and only knows how to pick on every (minor) mistake I make. For example, when I misplaced my handphone, he would comment that I'm absentminded and he referred to it as if it is my trait, even though my family acknowledged that he was the one who often makes such errors of similar nature.
He tends to put me down by listing my weaknesses to me and how I compare to others who are similar to me (eg. same gender, same age, same educational qualification etc.). This led me to have low self-esteem at certain areas of my life which were criticized, and I find it amusing that he questioned about my lack of self-esteem when he was the one who perpetrated it in the first place. I am well aware of my own weaknesses and I don't see the need for him to blatantly name them especially when his criticisms are not only extremely negative but most importantly unconstructive.
He is prone in making unbeneficial hypothetical statements such as "If you had done this in the first place, you would not have.....", "If you had a chance to choose another course of study, would you have.....". I mean, what's done cannot be undone. It is better to make the best out of the current situation and plan for the future rather than reiterating and criticizing past mistakes.
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