Oh, it wasn't just me? Now I want to start a trend. Just send type me videos of cats every time anyone at all asks for a type me video.Quote:
Originally Posted by Uncle Ave
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Oh, it wasn't just me? Now I want to start a trend. Just send type me videos of cats every time anyone at all asks for a type me video.Quote:
Originally Posted by Uncle Ave
At least now this thread will be killed by my humor instead of a fight.
There was a part of joke.Quote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
Though, I have some experience with him and other E9s. They seem ok, gather emotions and then "boom". :) Seems unpredictably. E9 are touchy and are supposed to have people near tuned to them in the similar way as they tend to tune to others to overcome opposings.
P.S. Check Enneagram E9, - the most introverted introverts. And also are dreamy enough to buy DarkAngelFireWolf69's heretical nonsense seriously because he mentioned (without good basis) their pairs as duals, where @asterr is another his E9 victim with nonsense typing as IEI (while having Fi type). @Northstar understood his LSI correctly initially and then... happened damned heretic DarkAngelFireWolf69.
Regarding people who tell you "send videos" so they can retype you - notice it's a typing method that makes it an impasse "your word against mine" (the exact same position you're starting from prior to sharing a video) while exposing your RL self. Clearly no ill intentions there at all, right? Lol. Then again, maybe he's just a weirdo who wants it for his creepy porn stash.Quote:
Originally Posted by Uncle Ave
edit
So LSE can be funny telling joke when LSI can be E9 shy
Haha I was being too much of a smartass to actually help that situation. By now I've gotten used to beta ST's roughness, and as long as we don't kill each other I'd consider it being playfulXDXDQuote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
ESI is angry that ur not working hard enough, LSI is angry that ur stupid and dragging him down. EII is not as assertive as ESI. ESI can be not assertive but thats until they are. they get to that point faster and are more aggressive in their communication and body language.
What would you have done in my position when the apparent SLE-Se guy started insisting on you lending him a hundred bucks, Bethany?Quote:
Originally Posted by Bethany
Sorry, but you presume to understand my character while you obviously don't. I'm don't gather up pent-up emotions, irritation and anger is immediately vented and then dissipates. I don't buy DarkAngelFireWolf69, his typings are just as bad as anyone else's (that includes you), I did the DarkAngelFireWolf69 paid typing thing fully to annoy a few people here who were DarkAngelFireWolf69 acolytes and claimed I had mistyped myself and DarkAngelFireWolf69 would see through my act. The funny thing is that he typed me the same in his system that I had done on my own. That hilariousness was worth throwing a few bucks in the toilet.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sol
That being said, all typologies are more or less wrong and don't describe the complexity of person. Reality is just always more messy than the simplification of systems and models. However, I simply don't agree that i'm J or rational type, my way of working is and has always been completely haphazard, jumping from one task to another at high frequency and very high variability in energy levels. I'm not stable in output or mood.
If you insist in typing me as an introvert, I think MBTI ISTP is the typing I've always found comfortably correct in its simplicity. Enneagram 9 I have never identified with, conflict avoidance and peacemaking is truly far off since from the very beginning of my life I've always been engaged in fights and conflicts regularly, particularily related to (in)subordination.
I haven’t read the post, soz. Were you dating them? I don’t think I’d be comfortable lending someone money..I don’t even trust my SEE sister with that haha.Quote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
once an ESI got mad with me because they bought me a cheap dinner..and I waited a couple of days before paying them back..that’s lame.
ok I just read one of the posts..he sounds like a piece of work. Good riddance.
And while we’re on the subject of money..a female ESI once stole about 500 pounds off me. Thieves are gross. It taught me not to be so trusting though which is an excellent lesson to learn when it comes to money. Especially if you’re not well off.
They’ll be judging the hell out of me, and telling me that what I’m doing is grossly inappropriate or immoral.
Just kidding. Kinda.
Nah, for real, the ESIs I know are fine with me until I do something that they have an issue with, and then they’ll bring it up. A lot of the things that I do, seem to upset them in terms of me showing inappropriate behaviour, or doing something that annoys/upsets them. Something that goes against the current of their values, or what they perceive to be “correct”.
For this reason, I find it hard to actually interact with them. Our actual understanding and sense of navigation within the world is very different; they have a value system based on relations, and ethics, and I find that I am a lot more impersonal than they are by nature.
I want to make sense of things logically, in the sense of reality and connecting things logically and seeing if anything contradicts. And if I can refine things.
ESI tend to do this, but from an ethical perspective. In a way, it’s a similar concept but with a different focus and I think that is the reason why we tend to butt heads a lot.
ESI want to go the blue (Fi) route when addressing an issue, and I want to go the green (Ti) route, and that causes conflict. We can’t find a good medium, so we argue over which is best and tend to disagree on our decision making choices, and on how we solve problems.
In terms of identifying them, I usually look for those defining features within the thought process.
I also find that at times, ESI with stronger Se can come across as more defensive of their values and of their ‘code of conduct’ and how they judge relations in terms of the concrete reality. ESI-Fi tend to be more subdued and in their heads, but they will also speak up if they think that X has violated Y, or they have a strong opinion etc.
At first I admired his strength, and I liked that he was ambitious like me, but all the pressuring soon turned unhealthy and unnerving. I felt increasingly uncomfortable and any alternatives and compromises I proposed fell on deaf man's ears. I genuinely cared and loved for him, and I believe that he loved me too in his own way, given his sadness and sense of betrayal afterwards. However, the pressure he continuously put on me, his greed, and his vindictiveness were unhealthy and hurting me.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bethany
Wow, jeez. If she was an ESI it sure shows that Socionics types aren't as black-and-white as portrayed in the descriptions. Yes, thieves are definitely gross, which is why I distrusted his insistence on my money. I'm happy to help someone in need, especially those who're close to me, but by providing them what they need, not giving them blank cheques. But he only accepted the latter, instead of the former, so his own avarice was the undoing of my trust of him.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bethany
Did you know the female ESI long and well before she took advantage of you?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
I have an IEI cousin whom I'm close to, and I have dated a few IEIs (three, actually), and while it pains me to admit it, I'm just not as tough as they are.
One needs to possess an incredibly thick skin to the date the guy I fell in love with. I honestly don't know who he'll end up with, because I imagine few able to endure his aggression, despite how much one loves him. I wouldn't be surprised if his greed will lead him to date a good-looking guy in his late thirties with the money to actually ubsist his ambitions of living in Paris to become a model there. Yet before he finds someone rich enough to not mind, I think that he will break his own heart and those of who he dates many times more. And each time things break apart, he hides his feelings deeper and becomes more callused. Truly tragic, but it already showed that I'm not the one to change the course he set onto the iceberg, despite my best efforts. For me there are people who I get along better with, even if it might take time finding them, and even though I'll take time off of dating for now, in order to truly get over him and to focus on my studies.
One thing this leaves me wondering about, however, how are there people in long-term, loving relationships from different quadras, if it seems so difficult to overcome the communication issues associated with it? Probably the lacking emotional health of the guy I was dating worsened my situation, though.
I think at least date someone share the same Te/Fi value. The differeces between Te/Fi and Fe/Ti seem much harder to deal with than Ni/Se vs Ne/Si.Quote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
Knowing about Socionics somehow limit my thoughts. Now I just want a dual relationship, not others. But before that I don't even want to have romantic relationship with anyone, so it's still a step forward lol
Nope..it slowly became clear the type of person she was. No morals. She was massively paranoid and worried about her future..as she was out of work. But I was decent to her and yet she convinced herself it was ok to steal from me. She could have paid me back at any point..Some people’s morals just go right out the window when they’re stressed. Oh it’s said we act like our ‘activity partner’ when stressed btw..that or our dual.. I think maybe we act like activity partner when under heavier stress..Quote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
oh also the ESI reminded me a little of an ex-IEE friend who didn’t steal from me..but rather sponged off of me lol.
Before living with me the IEE lived with an SEI. The IEE accused the SEI of stealing from her whilst they lived together. At the time I was shocked…honestly though I think the SEI was probably too afraid to ask for more rent in case the IEE hit the roof..
sorry about what happened with the guy…when you like someone it’s hard to fully see when they’re taking advantage of you. Gas lighting is real..
Yes, ESI's activity partner, SEE can believe that what is yours is due to him. This behaviour seems common to unhealthy Se-dominants based on the stories that I heard from people on the forum. Adam once mentioned a story of two SEE parents spending the whole inheritance a Grandma had left her ESI grandchild, for instance.
@Armitage, I can tell you how I was married to my Supervisor (from another Quadra) for many years, and for many of those years (the early ones, mostly), I was very, very happy.Quote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
I think my satisfaction came from two places. One, my parents were both Delta and I thought, like a wolf raised by ducks, that one day I would learn to fly, because they can do it, so I can certainly do it, too. You absorb the idea that the values you live with are the best ones for you. It's unfortunate, but true.
The second reason I was happy (for a few years) was that we were building a life and a family together, and that's exactly what an LIE and ESI do together. The problems arise when you realize that the other person's ideas of what constitutes a life and a family are very, very different from yours.
When my marriage failed (due to no fault of her or me, but rather due to our differences), I did the NT thing and went out and bought about thirty books on "How to Make a Long Term Relationship Last", and "How to Save This Marriage". Many of the books (not the best ones) recommended overlooking your partners faults, and that's exactly what I did when I was married. There was a lot of good in her, but there were also a lot of things that I didn't like, and in order to stay married, I had to "turn off" those parts of me which conflicted with her.
Let me say that again. In a long term relationship between two people who have different values, you have to turn off parts of yourself in order to get along.
Well, I decided that I didn't want to do that, so I filed for divorce. I mean, I realized that I could do that, but I didn't want to, and because there are healthy Duals out there, I don't have to.
One thing I should add about my deciding to get a divorce, is that when I made that decision, I wasn't in my twenties anymore. I felt that I was really too old to ever be in a relationship again, and I thought that it was a near-certainty that I'd never have sex again. However, the pain from the prospect of being alone for the rest of my life was less than the pain of staying married to a person who, I came to realize, didn't like me that much. And once I realized that, a switch flipped in the relationship. I walked out of that door and I never looked back.
I didn't anticipate that, three months after the divorce, I'd have a new GF who treated me much, much better. That was a nice outcome, but it wasn't something that I ever expected to have happen. (She was LSI, and THAT relationship convinced me that Socionics is true and that 3D Se and 2D Ni is just exactly right for me. :) )
Which is the reason I'm looking for healthy Duals. Only healthy Duals. I've had non-Dual women on dates tell me, "I've very good at sex, you know!" Well, great. You need to find a Dual who will be able to appreciate the rest of you, because that's not me.
The only difference between him and me is that I'm real, darling. ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Lunacik
I remember I have a few chances to step in romantic relationship, but my Ni always predict disaster. At those time I don't fully understand why, but now I get it. My Ni know that I can't be the guy those girls want. As long as I step in relationship, I have to change my behaviours to fit their needs, and I know (unconscious) that I can't. I hate not being myself, and romantic relationships seem to require too much from me, so I back down easily.
My negative Ni save my ass.
I think this to be an important consideration that you made, that being with your supervisor was more painful to you than being alone. And lucky strike that you met your LSI girlfriend not long after to show you that you have prospects for finding better love than what you experienced in your marriage.Quote:
Originally Posted by Adam Strange
Well, it was better sex with the LSI, anyway.Quote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
LSI - ESI
Ti =/= Fi <- Social (Extinguishment)
Se = Se <- Sex (Dual)
Ni = Ni <- Sex (Dual)
Fe =/= Te <- Social (Extinguishment)
LSI is half-dual, half extinguishment to LIEs, which sums to Mirage.
SLI is half Mirror, half Conflict to LIEs, which sums to Supervision
SLI
Si <- Conflict
Te <- Mirror
Fi <- Mirror
Ne <- Conflict
The SLI and I had bad interpersonal relations, but like an LIE-ILI team, or an LSE-SLI team, we made shitloads of money.
@Djinn, do you have any thoughts on this and on the guy I dated?Quote:
Originally Posted by Adam Strange
not really :popcorn:Quote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
More like it's screwing you over in the harshest and most hardcore of ways.Quote:
Originally Posted by Tarnished
What you've just said is fully indicative of a person (an ILI like myself no less) who has major attachment issues. You hate "not being yourself" eh? Why? Why wouldn't you be elated in/during the act of being who and what you are Ceterus Paribus? You share my instinct stack so I actually get it. You don't wanna die, but you also deeply crave intimacy.
Let me tell you that you'll never get the later if you refuse to risk the former. As I've said elsewhere, I had to rely upon my faith in God to get the words out to my friggin' dual that was/is my brother. The simple request? "I want to spend more time with you. Even if it's just once a month at first, can we at least manage that?"
He has ever since. I could go into more depth but that's not the point of this thread.
I can help you through these concepts if you'd like. The best thing you can do for yourself is open yourself up to the possibility that other people can, do, and actually will love you for who you are no matter how badly you think you are flawed.
Christ died on the cross for our sins. At no point did he resent this duty, but he did make a single request that hey, maybe he could not die that horribly? Request was denied but he still did his duty...
Yeah... more open up and taking more risk are what I'm going to do, but with my dual first (and last). Romantic relationship and marrige are always what I'm most skeptical about, I don't want to have a pain in the ass for the rest of my life.Quote:
Originally Posted by End
assert borders. u cant give someone money that u need when u dont know if they'd be the kind of person to help u later. i dont believe in lending bc then u control the other person whihc pushes them to make other things worse to give u the money back. u give what u can and if they can without sacricing too much then they return it. if it will hurt u too much to lose that money dont give it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
@VewyScawwyNawcissist, you're certainly right. I definitely did assert my boundaries by telling him that I did not intend on lending him the money and why. Whenever I did he would acknowledge what I said, only to come back on it later with the same persistence and increasingly frustrated. He namely thought that I was being a Scrooge, whereas I simply did not feel comfortable enough with him yet to lend/give him more money than any of my friends even have ever asked from me. Moreover, I know that lending money induces stress in both the debtor and the creditor. For the debtor its stressful, because they have to pay the money back eventually, while for the creditor it is stressful to have to see if the debtor will ever pay them back. The stress from both doesn't do any good to the relationship between the two. Even worse, the debtor might start evading the creditor, in order to escape their own guilt, which they project onto the debtor. While the creditor becomes increasingly adamant about getting their money back, the more that the debtor distances themselves from the creditor.
I had hoped to avoid all of this by simply not lending him any money. The more he pressured me into doing so, the less safe I felt giving him the money and that tension built up, until I got angry with him. <Sad sigh>
Even more, given how I projected him to be an ESI-Se instead of the SLE-Se that he is, I thought that I was doing well to mix up our finances, as Stratiyevskaya extensively warned ESIs for unhealthy LIEs acting irresponsible with the ESI's money.
@Armitage
not lending money shows ur not willing to help. the stressful part should be omitted with unfair expectations. this debt that ppl get to each other is toxic to any relationship. u do what u can for each other. someone may end up doing more for someone else, and the things vary in waht they are that somene can bring to someone else - u cant quantify them under one value to make "fair" decisions. if u have money u can spend that wont hurt u if u do they should be for charity be that giving them to someone else. ofc if ur 1D Fi u will be more reluctant to do that and struggle to figure what kind of person would be fine to do that with and whether its a thing that should be done in the first place which is why i guess adam said theres many sociopathic selfish LIEs. its a toxic world.
1:05 https://www.imdb.com/video/vi3986800...&ref_=tt_ov_viQuote:
Originally Posted by VewyScawwyNawcissist
@VewyScawwyNawcissist, indeed, due to my 1D Fi I didn't know if I could rely on him, so instead I proposed to pay for his room directly. At the time I didn't understand why he didn't take my offer, by now I suspect that it has to do that he wanted me to dive deep and trust him, but also for him to remain in charge of himself, and in control, instead of me paying for his needs. Am I correct?
Fun vid, Adam, I put it on my to watch-list. Though don't get me wrong, I definitely did want to help him, but since my friends distrusted his insistence on money, I instead wanted to do it my way. That's where things went wrong. In hindsight, I shouldn't have listened to the guys.Quote:
Originally Posted by Adam Strange
But I was scared.
i'd think he wants to be in control of how he uses the money, he can translate them to something else or more relevant somehow or even personal like drugs that you're not allowing him to do. idk how much he wants to exploit you however. most ppl like that have been hurt and tend to want to hurt other ppl as a "justice" and in their twisted mind to show u u are stupid for showing empathy. its a self destructive path they want u to take for them which is why i kept shittalking SLEs, even if not wholly like that they tend to have inclinations to selfish mindsets. a lot of them see the world as "us vs them".Quote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
he may do more loyalty tests forcing u to dive deeper and deeper. even have the mentality if u cant handle what ur diving in that ur weak and he doesnt want to associate himself with weak ppl bc reality is harsh and u'd be dragging him down which means he just used u to that point and its not his problem u gave more than u should have, that'd be your bad decisions. im only illustrating a mindset
once a car was driving on the walkway, dented and smoking front until it stopped. chad SLE fuqboi was the first to run there and try to get the woman out the car.
You did nothing wrong. This relationship was new and the foundations of trust had not had time to be established. You are entitled to move at a pace that is comfortable to you. In my experience, when someone tries to force you to trust, it is most often because they cannot earn it via more natural manifestations of it. One of the foundations of a healthy relationship is also respect, and an honest partner should be respectful of how you feel as well, not how they feel only. They should be respectful of your pace. They should be understanding that it may take longer for you than it does for them. Maybe you've had certain experiences they don't yet have awareness of. It takes time for human beings to trust in general, and it's important for this process to be respected, and for trust to be gained through authentic means. That's because it really isn't something you can force, anyway. Trying to force trust results in deepening your fears because you now have made yourself vulnerable without genuine trust saying it's safe to. All you're doing is taking a risk. That's not trust. This is important, as trust is one of the foundations of a healthy relationship and it needs to be solid in order for one to work. I don't mean there can never be issues or kinks to work out. When you begin a relationship, though...if you start off with nothing besides kinks to work out...that's going to be difficult to work through, since there is not an intimate bond glueing you together enough to even work through them together. There is also less feeling for the other person, which for many, translates into less motivation to change their behaviors out of guilt about the ways they affect you.Quote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
EDIT:
Less intimacy/feeling also translates into less motivation to make the amount of effort it takes to repair things. People have to value you enough to be willing to put in the required efforts. A new relationship doesn't have that intimacy (another relationship foundation) developed yet. Intimate and well established connections can take on more than new ones.
People underestimate the importance of open communication, as well. Ideally, in this situation, you could have both benefitted from more honest, open, and direct communication. Ideally, if he was feeling offended by you not trusting him, he would've told you. Then, you would've expressed your need for more time and bla bla bla. By listening to your point of view, he would've been able to give you more understanding, at which point you both would've been able to compromise by you paying directly for his rent, as you proposed (since this is already a middle ground option.)
What stands out to me on his end is the lack of respect he had for your boundaries, poor and indirect communication, insistence on trust, lack of forgiveness, vindictiveness, nonchalance about what he was spending your money on (pizza, eating out with your money). He isn't in a place of even having what it takes to have a solid and well established partnership with anyone healthy. He would need to work on himself to be fit for one.
Thanks, @VewyScawwyNawcissist and @Lady Lunacik for your insight, I appreciate it very much. :bighug:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
Renowned author Dan Brown picked up the cellphone and pressed the button on the cellphone to stop the ringing of the cellphone and held the cellphone to his ear so that down the cellphone he could hear the voice of the person calling on the cellphone.
“Hello?” he greeted.
It was his publisher, John Publisher.
“Hello, Dan Brown,” spoke John Publisher. “I’m calling you because I’ve had an idea and I want to tell you what the idea that I’ve had is.”
The wealthy scribe listened, his ears sharpening like pencils.
“What’s the idea you’re calling me to tell me that you’ve had?” he questioned.
“I’ll tell you,” informed John Publisher. “I want to republish bestselling book The Da Vinci Code – but this time, for Young Adults.”
Advertisement Young Adults, thought Dan Brown in italics.
“Young Adults,” confirmed John Publisher. “They’re a lot like adults – but younger. Obviously they can’t be expected to read the original novel, because its famously sophisticated prose is too complex for their puny teenage minds. So I want you to write a new version that is shorter and simpler, just for them.”
Dan Brown contemplated the idea using the brain encased by the skull beneath the skin of his head.
“I like your suggestion, John Publisher,” he told. “The only problem is, I’m aged 51 years old. How can I write a book for young people? I don’t know any young people.”
“How about your son?” recommended John Publisher.
Of course! The celebrated penman’s teenage son! Son Brown!
Dan Brown ended the call and excitedly paced the room, his fertile mind already pregnant with ideas to which he would soon give birth through his fingers.
After he had finished cogitating he walked upstairs to his son’s bedroom and entered it by means of the door. Son Brown wasn’t home, but his bookcase was. This will give me an indication of the simple-minded fare young people enjoy, mused the leading wordsmith. Tilting his head at an angle appropriate to the browsing of the books’ spines, he browsed the books’ spines.
Advertisement David Copperfield. Made sense – kids always did love magic tricks. Animal Farm. They loved cute animals, too. Ŕ la recherche du temps perdu. Say, he didn’t know his son could speak Spanish. Vanity Fair. Hey, Dan Brown loved Vanity Fair, too. Just last month it had run a great article about Scarlett Johansson’s favourite swimsuits.
Inspired, the illustrious scribbler returned to his study. His imagination was racing like a racecar made of brains. Picking up his personal copy of acclaimed tome The Da Vinci Code, he reread its exquisite opening paragraph.
“Renowned curator Jacques Sauničre staggered through the vaulted archway of the museum’s Grand Gallery. He lunged for the nearest painting he could see, a Caravaggio. Grabbing the gilded frame, the seventy-six-year-old man heaved the masterpiece towards himself until it tore from the wall and Sauničre collapsed backward in a heap beneath the canvas.”
Hmm, meditated the 5’9” caucasian male. There is no doubting the magnificence of the prose, from the effortless elegance of its syntax to the way it brings characters vividly to life through evocative details like “the seventy-six-year-old man”. But the young people of today wouldn’t know about museums or Caravaggio. I must start again from scratch – and bring the story right up to date.
Advertisement The eminent author opened his laptop and used the fingers of his hands to press the buttons marked with letters to form words on the screen.
“Famous rock star Jack Cool donned his baseball cap and rollerbladed through Tower Records while checking MySpace on his Game Boy,” he created. “The 22-year-old youth was excited to purchase the new compact disc by hip band Limp Bizkit. This rad chart-topper will sound fly on my Walkman, he reasoned, scrutinizing the $15.99 plastic oblong. Suddenly, there was a loud rumbling behind him. It sounded like thunder – but an unusual kind of thunder, made from a 70/30 polyester-cotton blend instead of clouds or whatever thunder was made of. He swung round – and then gasped in horror as he was crushed to death by an avalanche of Hootie & The Blowfish T-shirts.”
The moneyed doyen gazed with pride upon the vegetables of his labours. This was going to be his finest work since The Socrates Anagram.
From downstairs he heard a noise like the front door of a house being opened.
Son!” communicated Dan Brown. “Come see this!”
Son Brown climbed the stairs linking the ground floor to the floor above it and then walked forward until he had reached the room from which the order to come to it had been issued. Expectantly he looked at his progenitor, his youthful face shining like a torch but pink and with a nose in the middle.
His biological begetter pointed at the screen of the laptop. “Read this,” he invited.
Son Brown finished reading the paragraph, and then shook his head.
“Goddammit, Dad,” he imparted. “I’m sick of all these smug parodies of your work. These guys think they’re so damn smart. You’ve got to stop reading them. This one isn’t even plausible. There’s no way you’d write something as lame as that.”
Renowned Dan Brown looked at his offspring, and then back at the screen.
“Son,” he talked, “go do your homework.”
After his descendant had left the room, the notable fictioneer picked up his cellphone and pressed the buttons with numbers on one at a time in a given sequence.
“Look, John Publisher,” rebuked Dan Brown. “There’s no point reworking The Da Vinci Code for the youth of today. Great writing just goes straight over their heads.”
Here is an example of an ESI.
https://www.reddit.com/r/ukraine/com...he_moment_her/
You can tell she's an ESI because she's smiling as her enemies are destroyed.
LOLQuote:
Originally Posted by Adam Strange
In contribution to the thread: we may be someone completely different if you go a few months without talking to us and then meet up with us again. That "Si-demonstrative" introverted Se-preferring self-improvement shit. I know I grow fast as fuck, and I get the impression this is an ESI thing.
The Se is often directed inward because of the introversion giving us a focus on our own inner-world. Self-improvement is a huge thing in our lives. Can almost seem perfectionistic about ourselves, which can be mistaken for insecurity by those who don't understand.
How to recognize an ESI-Se when she's out shopping with lots of credit.
https://imgur.com/a/QYzxMDY
That's when an ESI-Se really comes into her own. She will hunt, identify the things which will be uniquely suitable, and then swiftly acquire.
Access to money just amplifies what is already there.
Is that a pic of a random woman who doesn't know you took the pic?????Quote:
Originally Posted by Adam Strange
That's a picture of my ESI-Se interior decorator when she was deep into a values evaluation. And now, having revealed her identity, I've deleted the picture.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Lotus
When we first met, she told me not to take her picture. Now, ten years later, she doesn't mind if I take her picture. I think that the difference is that she now knows that I'm not a pervert. Not a pervert in a way that troubles her, anyway.
I have some pictures of her actually posing for a picture, staring into the camera, but in those, she looks flat instead of being interested in something. A photographer once told me that the best pictures of people are taken when the people are looking at something other than the photographer.
I can definitely tell the difference between my friend and I. Both ESIs, but I am more 8-like. Direct in confrontation, no BS, no patience. She is far more patient and lenient, and will use more subtlety than me. She resorted to using and manipulating during dark times, and I resorted to physical violence during my dark times. She used guys for being assholes, and I was more like...a guy grabbed my boob in the hallway in middle school while walking by me the opposite way, and I turned, grabbed him by the throat, lifted him off the ground by it, and slammed him against a wall, got in his face, and snarled "don't you ever fucking touch me again." I had no patience for subtlety, I'd just kick peoples' asses. Enneagram 8 (or strong 8 fix) hates subtlety and is suspicious of it, is more direct. Both of us are ESI-Se 6's, but that second fix does make a difference.
Hahahahahah. Now I'm recalling when I would kick peoples' asses in school, and they'd say something to a teacher about what I was doing, and the teacher had been watching the whole incident and just replies, "you deserved it," because me kicking their asses was always in response to some sort of injustice that was done.
I totally agree with ESIs being all about self-improvement, because self-actualization, the internally focused Se, is generally perceived as the key to realizing one's Te goals, I have noticed with other ESIs.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Lotus
I would not go as far to say, however, that the ESI would be unrecognizable. Yes, he or she has grown in skill, fixed dysfunctional behaviours or at least tried to change their habits, and has worked on character flaws, but to argue them being a "completely different person", I deem a stretch. They are still them, they still hold their values high, have mostly the same interests, and retain their lone paladin attitude like how LSIs seem to be lonesome gunslingers.
That teacher was golden. :cool::thumbsup: What sociotype do you think that he was?Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Lotus
Ehh, I didn't mean that we would become something like an entirely different personality. More like...our character/values can be entirely different. Where they once would've been volatile and explosive, they now are more understanding and reasonable and level-headed; where they once would judge, now they are highly accepting; where they once were too generous, now they have better boundaries; etcetera and so on. When you have a bunch of those changes take place before meeting up with them again, that is what I mean by "a completely different person." Enough to leave people surprised at how much they've changed (improved). Most people make these changes, it's just human growth, but I notice ESIs seem more...attentive to it? Treating it as though it is prerequisite to other things in life (and I for one fully, wholly, believe it is.)Quote:
Originally Posted by Armitage
HAha. Yeah, she was awesome. I have no idea what sociotype, I couldn't even begin to guess. I didn't know her enough.Quote:
That teacher was golden. :cool::thumbsup: What sociotype do you think that he was?