What interests you in socionics
Why do you like socionics?
I like it because of duality, the scientific explaination that there really is a literal 'soul' mate(jung describes the soul = superid, which are composed of the same functions of ego of the dual relationship) and they're not just floating around in some unknown place, which you've got to get to know lots of people to find(if you do), but instead all around you, you just have to know where to look.
Re: What interests you in socionics
Quote:
Originally Posted by admin
I like it because of duality...
... and dislike because of conflict? (((:
Re: What interests you in socionics
Quote:
Originally Posted by admin
Why do you like socionics?
I like it because of duality, the scientific explaination that there really is a literal 'soul' mate(jung describes the soul = superid, which are composed of the same functions of ego of the dual relationship) and they're not just floating around in some unknown place, which you've got to get to know lots of people to find(if you do), but instead all around you, you just have to know where to look.
Life is so much richer in relationship opportunities than just duality. Two souls may click together regardless of socionic type of relationship, although the couple may still face the problems associated with that type of relationship. But love is irrational, whether you like it or not. ;)
What interests you in Socionics
I agree as well!
I'm especially interested in the relation dynamic in my family. My family is and has always been a mess!
I recently found out the sociotypes of several family members at a BBQ. The results were so accurate it was scary!!! The relations that many members shared was disturbing as well!
For example: I have an aunt (ESFP) that has two grown daughters, (1) ESTP (1) ENFJ... she treats the ESTP in a horrible and degrading manner for many years...While ESTP daughter has always treated her mother very well. On the other hand, the Mother treats the ENFJ daughter like she is a queen. While the ENFJ daughter treats her like crap and has even threatened her with violence in the past! She always forgives her and starts the destructive cycle over again...for many years!!
Didnt make any sense to me. .. but reading the relations module certainly clears some things up for me! With one daughter she shares a relation of "illusiary" and the other is her "benefactor." Go figure!!
Funny thing is I have two relatives that are considered my "beneficiary" and I do not see the relational module played out in our relationships. (odd?)
Re: What interests you in Socionics
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pearl Eighty
Didnt make any sense to me. .. but reading the relations module certainly clears some things up for me! With one daughter she shares a relation of "illusiary" and the other is her "benefactor." Go figure!!
Funny thing is I have two relatives that are considered my "beneficiary" and I do not see the relational module played out in our relationships. (odd?)
Not at all imho. People can be intelligent and loving - or on the contrary spiteful - no matter what type do they belong to.
What interests you in Socionics
Of course they can...human imperfection and Idiosyncrasies being BESIDE the point in this case!
...moving along!
What interests you in Socionics
You should be applauded for your knack for stating the obvious (ALL OVER THE DISCUSSION BOARD!)
Re: What interests you in Socionics
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pearl Eighty
Funny thing is I have two relatives that are considered my "beneficiary" and I do not see the relational module played out in our relationships. (odd?)
Pearl, you'll need to interact with them for some time before you can actually notice the dynamics of the 'Benefit' relation.
I'm the benefactor of my cousin and my friend (whom I'll call 'S').
I'm not close to my cousin so I really don't know what he thinks about our relationship.
But S is a long-time friend and I can tell you that as time passes by, our relationship worsens. It started of good. I notice then, that he was eager to please me and he held my words in esteem like I'm God or something. And when he mentioned something silly, he'd apologize like it's a big sin. It was amusing. Well our friendship is no longer like that. He's practically ignoring me now and we only do some small-talk whenever we bump into each other in social gatherings.
I also happen to be the beneficiary of another friend whom I'll call 'D'.
She was like a mother to me. I know this is going to sound lame but shortly after we knew each other, I began to perceive her as a 'caretaker'. I felt protected in her presence. I even thought to myself "I should get a man who's like D". It was all niceties in the beginning... but as time went by I started feeling sick of her presence. When she sat beside me in the class, a momentary dislike for her will surge in me. I wondered why I felt this way since there's no problem with our friendship at all. As if she could sense my unease, she would ask me "Are you okay?". I lied to her and said yes.
I told myself "You can't be feeling this way. D is a nice girl". But I just can't help it. Whenever I see her, I'd sometimes say in my head "You again". As with the case of S, I'm more of a hi-bye friend to D now. I don't blame her for being my Benefactor. It's just nature!
This is precisely why I believe in Socionics. It accurately describes the outcome of relationships.
What interests you in Socionics
Thats very interesting YMN.
Since you mention it, I can remember feeling this vague sense of discomfort. As if I felt unappreciated by them in some way resulting in my distancing myself from them.
They often talk to me about not feeling as if I spend enough time with them. And have even felt offended at the distance that I placed between us over the years.
I still love them (don't get me wrong) I just don't feel comfortable spending too much time in thier homes with thier families. They are constantly trying to make a relationship with me...and I'm constantly "regulating" the boundaries of our relationship.
HEY...Thanks for helping me understand that...How did you do that? lol
I remember Male21 saying that the beneficiary wants a level of closeness that the benefactor does not need or want. Sometimes the beneficiary takes this very harshly and cuts the ties.
Wanting to give that good what he or she gets back and hoping to get the recognition from this is how the social progress is happening.
What interests you in Socionics
Another theory on relations of benefit.
I read one person's (Beneficiary) experience where he (INTJ) said that in an attempt to "give back" what he was experiencing from his benefactor (INFP)... he turned very negative and "extraverted" into an ENTJ (her supervisor) ...his controlling and hurtful tactics made her run away. He still describes her as his ideal woman.
He went further to say that Benefactor aids the Beneficiary somehow...the benefactor cannot understand the beneficiary. The Benefactor is always the perfect mother or father, the beneficiary is always the needy child.
I'm experiencing that right now with an INTP friend of mine. I recently cut communications with him because he is often very passive aggressive and can display a very childish and uncaring side.
He has become very hurt and unaccepting of my descision and has even threatened me! He is has been acting just like a needy helpless child who won't take "go away" for an answer.
Very sad
What interests you in Socionics?
Quote:
Originally Posted by metaiwan
I have had a beneficiary and a benefactor relationship. The benefactor always seemed a really great person to talk to, as long as she kept her moods in control. The Beneficiary kept trying to please me and be my friend but I did not care much for him. I have seen a Benefactor-Beneficiary(INTP,INFJ) relationship which was broken off by the Beneficiary because the INTP seemed too childish and uncaring.
Did you ever wonder whether the INFJ was in fact an ENFJ and represented the INTP's Supervisor?
I share a CRAZY relation of Supervision with one of my aunt's. You seem to capture the reason why I distance myself from her... she is excessively childish and uncaring...not to mention opportunistic.
Of course, I can see how those characteristics could turn anyone off and want to leave a relationship of any kind.