Where are they? What do they like to do? Where can I meet one?
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Where are they? What do they like to do? Where can I meet one?
I believe Olga on this forum is an ISFj, or at least has typed herself as such.
Like any type, ISFjs can be found in just about any career. In my experience, it seems that they're drawn to jobs such as project management or ones that are research-related. Other possible "typical" careers may include dentistry or child care. You can probably find them in just about any organization. They tend to be drawn to details; they like things to be done properly (e.g., according to solid academic standards) and on time (or well before they're due). But they typically have a softer edge when dealing with people than, say ISTJs.
At least those are my observations.
true. similar to INFjs i think regarding details and the like. (due to :Ti: role maybe?)Quote:
Originally Posted by Jonathan
isfj's at work can be found in sociology and criminology related fields, along with the social policy sector. they enjoy "ethicizing". i have no idea about suggestions for places to meet them. parties, maybe.
Agreed.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jonathan
My wife is an ISFj and she's in the medical industry.
ISFJs are quick to jump to conclusions about everything around them, particularly people. You can catch them doing this quite easily, and in coversation if they ever hesitate and close their lips and you can almost hear them exhaling in what sounds like a sigh, their emotions have some how guided them to a judgement. Its pretty brutal because the males I know think they are the best shit to walk on this earth. They are obsessed with their own image, and enjoy making fun of the faults of others because they feel that their effort has payed off. They can be very very loyal friends, but if you are not their friend they treat you like lower class shit. They like to hang on to people by fish hooks and bait them in. Once the friend likes the ISFJ, the ISFJ will spend less time with them only when they know it will be the most beneficial for them. The ISFJ tends to hang out with people they feel are physically and/or mentally inferior to help bolster their image. They are not horrible people, but have an idealised image of themselves. They make fun of people way too much, even close friends.
Their main strength is they are loyal. No wonder the manipulative ENTJ loves the ethical game they set up for them, it works out perfectly. I dont mean manipulative in a bad way either by the way (just to stay on track here!).
I don't know how many ISFJs there are (though probably not many), but ISFJs don't go out much. Their idea of a exciting evening is one in which they decided to make popcorn to eat while watching T.V. on their couch... in contrast to other nights in which they just watch T.V. on their couch. So I don't think it's easy to find them.
ISFjs are loyal, yes. I don't see that as their greatest strength though. I think their greatest strength is their sincerity. People who are not close to them will not actually see the true person, but if there is an ISFj in your life, you can count on him or her to just flat out tell you what their assessment of a situation or person is. There's no wishy washy bullshit or sugar coating or games or tip toeing around your feelings. If they think something is foolish, stupid, or wrong, they'll just say so. This is a bit harsh for some people, but in combination with the positive Fi qualities, such as the afforementioned loyalty or their family values, it makes them, imo, invaluable. Some of them also tend to "play rough" when it comes to joking around and whatnot. When people get offended because of their sincerity or style of humor, they will likely see the other person as being too sensitive and will be unsympathetic and unapologetic. ISFjs understand that a true friend tells you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. They also understand that it is not in a person's best interest to coddle them and overlook their weaknesses.
They may have strong values about how it is okay and is not okay to treat other people. For example, an ISFj may scold you for making fun of the way someone looks (even in their absence) or being unkind. If, however, that person is on their shit list, all bets are off.
ISFjs are also good at seeing that things get done when they need to get done. From what I've seen, they have a good memory for details, the type of stuff that's relatively important but easy to forget, such as something needing to be done, a person's name, a detail about an event such as an item that needs to be bought along, etc.
ISFjs are prolly most easy to recognize from their buttoned up appearance. They may be polite with strangers or those they don't know well, but they will not be familiar.
Actually, I hate it. Diverts energy that could be directed towards more...positive? happier? resultsQuote:
Originally Posted by IcEPiCk
Rocky, the ISFJ I know (maybe this is at their younger ages I dunno)...
Loves going to the beach. Obsessed with self image, likes to show off what they have and what they know is appealing. Almost as if programmed to attract materialistic people, if Dad has a beamer must take it out to pick up the girls... Gotta shave chest before the beach is hit.
Condescending to feel better about ones self... and yet loyal. Thats the one thing I cant wrap my head around. I give up and avoid though.
Rofl.Quote:
Originally Posted by Joy
So where do I go to meet ESI's? Also, is there a characteristic VI component I should know to help me identify them?
Thanks.
Church, school, studying somewhere.
I find them in many areas, but I am certainly aware of their presence then I see their death stares pointed towards me anytime I talk.
on the pole with a FU-dirty-bastard expression
lmao
Someone once told me that they are often found working as funeral directors.
If you're an LIE, they will find/meet you. True story.
If they aren't swarming you, then you might be mistyped, gay or need to shower more often.
They love the devil, vote for Obama, and take vacations in France...
why do you have the name of the forum in your signature?Quote:
Originally Posted by Saberstorm
i don't really understand questions like this. people, regardless of type, generally go to work and buy groceries and take their dogs on walks and stand in line at the dmv and attend weddings. presumably you could find any type along the normal course of life events. i don't really know what kind of answer you're expecting.
that said, i've rarely encountered LIEs myself. maybe its just a matter of how we're typing people.
there is no characteristic VI component. tense comportment and shrewd looking eyes MAYBE.
uh... cause I like it. Actually, I was showing off my choice of what the forums name should be - socionics/the16types.info or something to that effect. I believe it was because hk wanted to incorporate the word socionics into the site name, but he also wanted to keep "the16types.info" so I thought "socionics - the 16types.info" seemed the best, especially if you use comic sans as the font. Anyway, I put it as my signature to sse if it looked good. ???
I don't think I have shrewd eyes. Shy at times maybe. Occasionally socially awkward at times when I tell a really dorky joke and realize no else thinks it's funny... Kind of put my foot in my mouth. But then again, when I'm comfortable around people I can be fairly charming. but uh, yeah, no idea where to meet 'em... a bank? my sister works with a few.
I don't really believe in VI. As for where to meet them... probably the same places you would meet anyone. Church, the beach, playing sports, bars, etc... I can't really say how all ESI's are but I am somewhat shy upon first meeting a person and it takes a while to warm up. It helps when the other person is more talkative and outgoing.
I'm going to meet plenty of ESIs in about 20 mins. Give me your money so I can arrange you meet every single one of them, DJ.
They DO! That's why i'm so damn certain they're who I'm looking for. Thing is I didn't really know what I was doing with women or had any confidence until about 5 months ago so I'd always put them on a pedestal and gross them out, or they'd be pregnant with some other guy, or something always happened.Quote:
Originally Posted by Finale
I had 2 of them talking to me at the same time about a month ago but one of them flaked and said that 9 years is too young for her...
I just want to increase my chances of meeting more somehow I guess.
And no, ESI's do not glare and look mean. They look very assertive though. and I fucking love it.
A while back I talked to one who was like, 6 inches taller than me, but the way she looked at me was amazing. She tended to stay in the back of the room and eye me from afar, I had to start most of the conversations. She'd talk to me while holding the fingers of her other hand. 6' 2 looking down on me but really shy. It was adorable. so I asked her out and she moved to chile.
Seriously I should have one by now but I'm a rutard.
My finance and accounting classes were chock-full of ESIs. However, they were mostly some kind of normalizing subtype enneagram-1 - not really the most interesting people on this world. My economics classes contained an equally high amount of ESIs, but those tended to be a bit more alternative and well, less stuck-up.
We're always calling my ESI friend sour because of her expression. We tend to call her Sergeant Sourpuss with mixed reception on her part >>Quote:
Originally Posted by octo
LOL, talking to pregnant chicks.................................i can imagine that not working out.Quote:
Originally Posted by DJ Arendee
well number one, don't ever be desperate. (not saying you are..but beware of how you're coming across),
and have a lot of confidence. it's always more charming to see the best part of someone and slowly be exposed to the nerdier/dorkier side so it becomes endearing and not annoying or a red flag.
Idk if it's type related but once a guy has my interest, I tend to pursue him... and make him think he's done all the work when things come together. biggest turnoff is when a guy chases after me..I like a lot of distance initially and a few ESIs I know see the same.. Se subtypes.
You'll find them bossing and imposing values on people. (Sorry, my manager is ESI.)
VI: conventionally good-looking, elongated jaw/chin, side-swept bangs, and glasses.
ISFJ - do not say it in Meyers Briggs speak. Do you mean ESI?
OH MY GOD YOUR IMPROPER USE OF MEYERZ-BRIGGZ TERMINOLOGY IS GOING TO BREAK THE INTERNET.
(Back in 2006 when this topic was originally post people said ISFj and then it was FiSe until we finally learned how to do it the way you like.)
<.< look for any situation where someone will do some amoral shit and the first person who jumps at the chance to tear that amoral shit's mind, soul and body to shreds will most likely be ESI ^^;. At the very least they will go from "pleasant looking person" to the "I will fuck you up!" indignant looking one. In my experience its very difficult for me to tolerate amorality and I have to control myself a LOT in order to not get "in your face and confrontational" or not to write off that person as "dead to me".
In my experience the tendency is t go from "live and let live" to willful assertion of personal ethics. From pleasant to commanding in an instant.
Never met a "commanding" ESI in my whole life, even those who were in leadership positions seemed to be slightly awkward about it.
hah...hah...ohhhQuote:
Originally Posted by FDG
In just 17 posts you have struck upon the most vital secret of true socionics, the conflation of one's expressed self-image and its underlying neuroses with the canonical qualities of an entire type. Add another notch to what remains of your typological belt.Quote:
Originally Posted by Rim
I'm only agreeing with ESI in general terms as it seems to reflect the way I am as an individual. ;) I'm not blind to the myriad of differences 2 people of the same type can have. For example I know another 6w7 -4 -1 and she is drastically different from how I am, thou we do share some commonalities. The thread called for something other then asserting my personal vision of what type of ESI I am.Quote:
Originally Posted by k0rpsy
I assume that since I'm ESI and the Fi description states this very clearly, most other ESI's will react the same way. For me its a complete switch from a more passive seemingly emotionless external state to a pissed off assertive one and yeah I'd call it "commanding" in a sense that I'll shove my ethics down your throat by force if need be, if you won't comply, either way I'll plot your demise ;)....its a very bad idea to piss me off. (I'm exaggerating to emphasize how volatile I actually become...must be a 6 thing "reactive").Quote:
Originally Posted by FDG
^^ villeicht waren die nicht ESI oder die sind nicht wie Ich. Ganz einfach. I tend to take a more proactive counterphobic 6 approach to "restoring harmony".
That's fine, I just don't find most people I'd class as ESI as being as dogmatically rigid and reactive across a broad spectrum of situations as what's said in type profiles or the thoughtless stereotypes that are thrown around here. Many of these hackneyed caricatures of Type X as this or that are attempts by various persons to dissociate themselves from their own negative qualities and project them onto others. Other times it's just idiotic parroting that lacks any attempt to suss the nuances of how IEs manifest behaviorally and attitudinally in living persons of a particular type. So if in fact you "tremble with indignation at every injustice" then I'll accept that that's how you personally (and ostensibly) correspond with ESI, but in my experience that sort of militant vigilance doesn't ring true across the board. /$0.02Quote:
Originally Posted by Rim
I found early on in the enneagram that negative qualities are good clues as to what type one actually is. They tend to be followed by horrid awakenings as to what one's real nature is. Sort of like a sudden objective glimpse into what one does and what one thinks one does. ESI or not, I am who I am and it manifests most clearly in my negative reactionary behavior. Don't take this the wrong way, ;) I'm not some self righteous angry maniac mindlessly attacking anyone who is amoral...but certainly tend towards that kind of behavior at times in a more rational manner.Quote:
Originally Posted by k0rpsy
ITT Kassie gets pooped on for no reason :P
I can see a definite E6 slant to what you're saying here1, though the truth of the first sentence allows it to stand alone. That is, the E-type that one finds embarrassing produces that response because it is cognizable as symbolizing one's essential faults and coping mechanisms. Personally I find this to be more true of the primary wing, which I think generally represents the seat of neurosis, than it is of the main type.2Quote:
Originally Posted by Rim
However, since socionics concerns itself more with cognitive structuralism and interpersonal connectivity than it does with the identification and correction of deficiencies, that recognition might have a lesser effect when considering superego functions, though it will probably be present to some degree.3
Anyhow other than the initial, semi-friendly elbowing I wasn't really singling you out, just commenting on patterns I've noted on this particular forum.4
- My response is less one of the E6's signature catastrophism expressed in a "horrid awakening" than it is an upwelling of laughter at the absurdity of existence. An E5 thing perhaps, maybe, potentially.
- It is possible that the main type's foibles are less upsetting to one's self concept because they are so deeply integrated into the automatic defenses of one's ego, i.e. that portion of the mind we designate as being the conscious world-navigator, and so those deficiencies reside in a rather secure blind spot. However, the underlying shortcomings of the first wing are often an object of private contemplation and thus are more introspectively visible to the self.
- There is no shortage whatsoever around here of complaints and excuses concerning the vulnerable function.
- We'll save the torturous hazing necessary for induction into Gamma proper for another time. Be sure to have your application and filing fee in order at the appointed time, and eat no less than one hour prior to entering the dunk tank.
I'm sure Bardia, Allie, and Tackk would be delighted to share.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jadae2point0
:confused: i didn't notice.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jadae2point0
What you're describing, Rim, sounds closer to what Fi-creatives (usually of the delta variety) can often be like (e.g. Kim, Eliza Thomson), rather than Fi-base IME.
I'd look perhaps into that type before ISFj, but I'm only superficially going off of the traits you've described within yourself. So, grain of salt.
Its a really harsh, misperceived reflection of the collective version of ISFj.Quote:
Originally Posted by lungs
phew, good thing i'm not the collective version.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jadae2point0
i'm not really sure what was harsh anyway, the idea of shoving ethics down people throats? thats such a common perception of fi base types that i don't even notice it as anything extraordinary anyway. and some people would probably say i do that. people that don't really understand me, of course. (:
Maybe you just need to beat their asses until they universally approve :PQuote:
Originally Posted by lungs
You mean IEE specifically? Yeah I thought I was delta initially, but it always felt "off" somehow and I decided socionics was bullshit until someone mentioned I should look at ESI. There is a kind of agression and tendency to be confrontational that deltas seem to lack while I don't. I'd put it down to their lack of Se. Similarly in the MBTI I scored NFP, however when on the forums I can't relate to them for some reason, too much whining, passive agression, feeling expression and they run from conflict (so I still don't have an MBTI type :p either).Quote:
Originally Posted by Radio
I do tend to be willful and reject information at first before I check it out...<.< however imo stereotyping is bullshit and one shouldn't confuse high intellignce with being iNtuitive, especially not with having logic preference (something many people tend to do)
Why are we talking about my type anyway?
Btw I know OP from another forum where he asked about his type and I gave my opinion on it, I wouldn't go near his beta ass with a 10 ft pole thou.
Only Chuck Norris can find ESIs, ESIs usually grab you when they want you
Quote:
Originally Posted by 1981slater
for real?has this ever happened to you?
only ESI is able to chuck Chuck in
In my experience ESIs tend to be very pragmatic and have a natural attention to detail. What this means in the realm of theater is that they trend toward taking on the role of director, which is very a very detailed oriented position as well as dealing heavily with interpersonal relationships, and stage manager which is almost an exclusively detail oriented position. Stage managers are like secretaries with authority.
As an EII who is well experienced in delivering the Verbal Bitch Slap of Justice (TM), it's not at all impossible to be :Fi: base and have that habit. If you're going off of other information outside of this thread, then I can't really say anything, but I disagree that Rim should potentially consider other type options because he/she tends to lambaste people over perceived offenses.Quote:
Originally Posted by Radio
bingo. glad you pointed that out. So what happens when you're in a relationship?Quote:
Originally Posted by blackburry
Creative :Se: is in the airQuote:
Originally Posted by jennifer1
I'm the opposite; I like someone to take initiative and get to know me. I'm usually the quiet, distant, shy, bundled up person in the corner somewhere. I like for people to show their nerdy or intellectual side first then unravel their fun/outgoing side later.
that was no sarcasm.i really want to know. if they are like that i will raise the issue on the next ESI internationale.this is serious.Quote:
Originally Posted by 1981slater
I'm serious, :Se: girls approach the guys they like, :Si: wait for others to approach them, IMO.Quote:
Originally Posted by jennifer1
generalized too quickly probably. If I drew any conlusion (very carefuly, though), I'd say that it also depends on other elements in the model A.Quote:
Originally Posted by 1981slater
Ethics more readily respond to and generate attraction, so in fact they can just manipulate your approach.
What's more, :Si: is dynamic in itself, so it can respond variously, depending on a situation and willpower. Maybe they won't go directly but they will find a way to get what they want.
I doubt all ALL esis initiate especially with different cultural expectations and everything. But I would bet that there is a general trend of being upfront regardless who makes the first move. And of attempts at playing coy or hard to get coming off awkward. Fi + Se is sort of a perfect cocktail for knowing what you want and being real about it but of course how Fi + Se manifests in each person is different and all that jazz so "grab" isn't going to always be true.Quote:
Originally Posted by jennifer1
u sure
Okay it's always true.
Yeah, well, I don´t know, in my culture of origin (Italy) girls never make the first move, or almost never anyway. They likely don´t need to. Even the most extraverted Se dominant women kind of don´t, as far as I have seen.
idk it's not about "needing to," i'm glad i live in a country that's more progressive that way. being chased after is gross.
I don´t think this trait is easy to understand without incurring in stereotypes. It´s simply something that you never see anyone doing, so - if you´ve lived in the same place until that time - you tend not to do it, aswell. Similarly, if you´re a male and you see every male immediately trying to approach a girl he finds attractive, that becomes the "norm". Being "chased" after is only gross if you don´t like the guy (girl), I would guess.Quote:
Originally Posted by lungs
I'd like to understand how "chasing" is percieved?
I know with her, we'll hang out and it'll be great, then for the next 3 days she'll text me and call me with good energy and I won't initiate, then on the 4th and 5th day I'll text her (because I want to) and she'll turn off and stop texting me for a couple weeks.
I used to be the same way, women who made themselves too available were of no interest to me. I got so sick of it I forced myself to just go for it anyway. Shit's frustrating even to myself.
then I read this:
Quote:
Aggressor: Aggressors tend to perceive other Aggressors as exciting partners worthy of admiration and respect, but ultimately unsatisfactory due to a sense of never-ending competition for an ill-defined "upper hand", which becomes frustrating.
My INTp brother often tells me I'm acting "needy," so I suspect it has something to do with quadra values. The concept of being a male "victim" to me just seems like they sit around all day and hope some girl falls through their roof, which I don't feel like sitting around waiting for. I suspect "victims" are the ones who believe meeting the one "just happens." HA! If only they knewQuote:
Originally Posted by lungs
i remember reading that article about victims ,pseudo-victims yaddayadda
i think that IXIs are more susceptible to being vocal about obsessing over their love interests whereas ENXjs will just go on with their lives doing stuff like proper Si polrs and the more someone enters their "space" the greater the impact. i'd that it's more likely an IXI will remember you because Ip temp makes it easier to focus for longer on what interests them.or not.
I think victims do a little chasing too, just in a different not annoying way. Maybe I'll say more later when I'm not waiting for a bus but for now I'll just quote this part of a Balzac book I'm reading that made me lol:
"this moment is full of charm for the one who can guess all that passes in a woman's mind. Who has not refrained from giving his opinion, to prolong her suspense, concealing his pleasure from a desire to tantalize, seeking a confession of love in her uneasiness, enjoying the fears that he can dissipate by a smile?"
As for being chased idk it makes me feel restricted whether I like the guy or not.
But I think its complicated by gender stuff which can make things annoying
usually,to be chased can feel like a painful and clumsy head-on attack made by someone who sees you monodimensionally and is usually uncapable of processing the rest of you.
Where can I meet ESIs, I want to meet them so so so so badly.
Well it does say aggressors want some degree of "control." The "ickiness" probably has something to do with that.