LSIs/ISTjs feeling anger and irritation
Hello, I would like advice from ISTj’s or people who a lot of experience with ISTj’s.
I work with an ISTj and all around he is a cool guy. He tends to get pretty angry from time to time, ranging anything from dealing with customers to his fellow employees. Sometimes he gets angry towards me, and depending on the reasons for his anger I may either just ignore him or choose to argue back at him. Yesterday we were having a holiday fest and our department had to put people at free sampling stations, I was one of them. I was ordered throughout the time to do certain things that diverted my attention away from our department. After the holiday fest was over with, I managed to do whatever I could, but then I forgot to do a few things that related to cleaning everything up. The ISTj thought that I was creating a situation so that he would have to clean up after me; basically he thought that I was purposely acting against him, and when I tried to explain to him that it was not the case, he basically called me a liar. I was not happy with that at all. I could not help but get angry. I have to work with him, and I swear, I could just strangle this guy. I mean, he is a good guy, I like him, but damn, I can really get into fight with him! Right now, I could just get into his face, but I probably ought to just calm down right now (which is not easy for me to do).
My questions are this:
How angry does an ISTj have to get to lose their reasoning ability? Or in another words, is it likely that I can reason with this guy even if he is really angry at me?
How necessary that an ISTj has to vent off? How long does it take for them to?
Thanks in advance
Jimmy
ISTjs feeling anger and irritation
Do you find that your anger level, between one and ten, never really sits in the middle of the scale, but instead bounces from the low end all the way to the high?
Now I want to make a distinction between anger and irritation. Anger for me is an intense feeling of rage that overwhelms my ability to think rationally, whereas irritation is a milder emotion, a kind of "fuck off" reaction to things that interrupt or impede my activities.
I let irritation out all the time, saying "What?!" to people bothering me, shouting at cars on the road, responding with "Blah blah blah go away," etc.
Anger, however, is something I usually repress. It just never seems justified to me. I feel like it's ridiculous, an absurd way of dealing with troubling situations. This leads to an instinctive shuffling aside of anger-driven impulses to an almost algorithmically insignificant position in my consciousness.
Eventually, however, something pushes me over the line. When the catalyst is impersonal, it is invariably due to some kind of physical malfunctioning of something vital to my productivity, like my computer or car.
It is far more common, however, for a person or persons to cause me to go over the edge. In high school, an obnoxious, fat SLE got in within inches of my face and verbally bullied me over the fact that he was right in a dispute over a play during a game of kickball. He was such an overbearing ass that I went into this berserk rage, punched him in the face and then proceeded to run circles around him, taunting him for being too fat to catch me. I poured all of my anger into making him suffer as much as possible, saying the meanest things I could think of, like making fun of him for not having a dad, that sort of thing. This sounds like I was just being mean, but I was irreconcilably angry, pumped so full of adrenaline that almost became an animal.
Other examples are taking the hat off an ILE kid who was bullying me and hitting him in the face with it as hard as I could. More recently, Joy was being a bitch, so I took her laptop and shattered it across my leg.
The point here isn't that my actions were so extreme, it's that in each of these circumstances I went from being totally calm--or at least composed--to suddenly, unexpectedly lashing out hysterically in pure infuriation, like going from moonless night to noonday sun in an instant, no graduality whatsoever.
Do you LSIs relate to this?