Family and Friends problems
Hello there.
I've not been here for a long time, actually, procrastinating and doing some shit around this mouths. But, i want to ask u guys a question about types.
Reading this forum make me questions about how do you relate your problems with your family/friends. Just curiosity, because in my humild case, i feel devasted. Im not depressed right now, but fighting with my girlfriend or stay in a war between my friends doesnt make me feel good.
So, I want to know how do you relate this kind of things in your life (or just how do you type generally take this things), maybe I can learn from you guys (and yeah, Im not asking u as a patient, just take the 'maybe' of the sentences).
Hope you'll be fine.
=)
pd. and asnwer please =(
Re: Family and Friends problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by normal
Hello there.
I've not been here for a long time, actually, procrastinating and doing some shit around this mouths. But, i want to ask u guys a question about types.
Reading this forum make me questions about how do you relate your problems with your family/friends. Just curiosity, because in my humild case, i feel devasted. Im not depressed right now, but fighting with my girlfriend or stay in a war between my friends doesnt make me feel good.
So, I want to know how do you relate this kind of things in your life (or just how do you type generally take this things), maybe I can learn from you guys (and yeah, Im not asking u as a patient, just take the 'maybe' of the sentences).
Hope you'll be fine.
=)
pd. and asnwer please =(
My personal opinion on the best way to deal with people is to ask yourself why they say and do the things they do. Put yourself in their situation and try to make sense of everything from their perspective. If there are multiple people involved, do this for each of them. After you've figured it out the best you can, talk to them and say stuff like, "If I was the one who had *insert appropriate situation* happen to me, I'd probably be *insert appropriate state*." Make sure they can see that you respect them and that they're important to you, as are their opinions and whatnot. Ask them what you can do so that they're not as stressed out or frustrated or whatever. Their attitude will change to one of cooperation and the two of you will be more likely to find compromises or clear up misunderstandings.
Another thing to keep in mind is that people will generally behave as you expect them to behave. Treat a child like a brat, and (s)he'll act like a brat, etc. Imagine that the people in your life already behave they way you want them to. Shifting your perspective like this can make a huge difference. You'll start treating them differently, and they'll respond by behaving the way you assume that they will. This doesn't always work, but it often does... and it can make a big difference.
It's also important to set boundaries. Decide how you deserve to be treated, and then when someone is not treating you properly, tell them so. Just say that their behavior is not okay and move on... no need for dramatics. Just make sure your actions are consistent with what you say. :-)
Re: Family and Friends problems
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joy
My personal opinion on the best way to deal with people is to ask yourself why they say and do the things they do.
You sure about this? It never works with you :lol: