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Thread: Compartmentalization

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    Default Compartmentalization

    I've noticed that certain people (well, males mostly, so maybe it's a gender thing) are better and keeping different areas and/or people tidy in a box and not really allowing them to spill over into other areas of their life. Why is this and is it type related? And if so, what function allows it? I feel like it's hard for me to stop myself from integrating everything and everyone.
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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    I've noticed that certain people (well, males mostly, so maybe it's a gender thing) are better and keeping different areas and/or people tidy in a box and not really allowing them to spill over into other areas of their life. Why is this and is it type related? And if so, what function allows it? I feel like it's hard for me to stop myself from integrating everything and everyone.
    I used to have a rule that work was work, and play was play.

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    I think part of it is just wanting to be in control of your emotions, and your thoughts, and actions, and so on.

    And when you decide everything you do all the time based upon what's there it becomes easy to say that different rules apply in different places.

    You're in a church, you don't say FUCK, unless you want to be disrespetful.

    You're meeting someone new, who keeps on trying to make you act a certain way, you casually mention about deficits you notice around you in what he's doing, how he's acting, and so on, so that he'll get a little flustured, and stop trying to make you act a certain way as much. Or just don't "fit in" to what they want you to do. I'm independent, I'm my own person, I do things my way. You do things your way. Create a split.

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    Quote Originally Posted by mercutio View Post
    I used to have a rule that work was work, and play was play.
    interesting that you should reply to this. I think the SLE I know is the same. In fact, I was kind of thinking of him when I wrote this although I know other people who do the same thing but probably not to the same extent. He once told me that he lives his life in 5-minute increments. I may pm you....
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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    interesting that you should reply to this. I think the SLE I know is the same. In fact, I was kind of thinking of him when I wrote this although I know other people who do the same thing but probably not to the same extent. He once told me that he lives his life in 5-minute increments. I may pm you....
    I remember when I was young "discussing" planning ahead / thinking ahead...

    Some people thought about tommorow, or this evening or smoething. I usually thought 2 to 3 steps ahead. Then I started to "learn" to think about up to 20 minutes ahead. Sometimes it was just lining things up.

    Now I generally tend to think in a "task" manner .. like I'll think ahead for the task . .what will come up etc. It's kind of like imagining going through the task really fast, and what will get in the way. And what has to be acquired before proceeding.

    WHAT I HATE is that when you mention what's in there to some people they're like "we're not up to that yet", but it's like i do the same. It's like I like to think ahead, but I know at the same time, that some people don't like to be told in advance too much. They just want the steps one by one.

    Whereas other people want to know "where we're going".

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    Quote Originally Posted by mercutio View Post
    I remember when I was young "discussing" planning ahead / thinking ahead...

    Some people thought about tommorow, or this evening or smoething. I usually thought 2 to 3 steps ahead. Then I started to "learn" to think about up to 20 minutes ahead. Sometimes it was just lining things up.

    Now I generally tend to think in a "task" manner .. like I'll think ahead for the task . .what will come up etc. It's kind of like imagining going through the task really fast, and what will get in the way. And what has to be acquired before proceeding.

    WHAT I HATE is that when you mention what's in there to some people they're like "we're not up to that yet", but it's like i do the same. It's like I like to think ahead, but I know at the same time, that some people don't like to be told in advance too much. They just want the steps one by one.

    Whereas other people want to know "where we're going".
    hmmm, yeah I think sles think the goal through pretty well when there's something specific they want to accomplish. And once it gets going, they want to see it through. my sle friend had a question for me and I was going to have to check with my husband and I put it off for a couple of weeks because I didn't realize the sle needed to know right away and I could tell he was getting annoyed with me the next time I saw him so I quickly apologized and followed through with my part of the plan. lol
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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    hmmm, yeah I think sles think the goal through pretty well when there's something specific they want to accomplish. And once it gets going, they want to see it through. my sle friend had a question for me and I was going to have to check with my husband and I put it off for a couple of weeks because I didn't realize the sle needed to know right away and I could tell he was getting annoyed with me the next time I saw him so I quickly apologized and followed through with my part of the plan. lol
    now or never, do or die, black and white, true and false.

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    Quote Originally Posted by mercutio View Post
    now or never, do or die, black and white, true and false.
    yep, exactly. and he was like "well you haven't brought it up so I'm going to assume you don't want to do it, blah blah" and I was like "NO! I do!" and I had to explain myself quickly. It was pretty funny actually. But I had no idea what his time line was really. He had led me to believe he was laid back about that when obviously he expected me to take action. haha
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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    yep, exactly. and he was like "well you haven't brought it up so I'm going to assume you don't want to do it, blah blah" and I was like "NO! I do!" and I had to explain myself quickly. It was pretty funny actually. But I had no idea what his time line was really. He had led me to believe he was laid back about that when obviously he expected me to take action. haha
    Hesitation can show a lack of loyalty.

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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    I've noticed that certain people (well, males mostly, so maybe it's a gender thing) are better and keeping different areas and/or people tidy in a box and not really allowing them to spill over into other areas of their life.
    I do very much of this.

    Why is this?
    Well otherwise I would get ostracized by people that I just have to get along with. And some situations require adopting a role, that's very illsuited with rest of my life.
    ...the human race will disappear. Other races will appear and disappear in turn. The sky will become icy and void, pierced by the feeble light of half-dead stars. Which will also disappear. Everything will disappear. And what human beings do is just as free of sense as the free motion of elementary particles. Good, evil, morality, feelings? Pure 'Victorian fictions'.

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    Quote Originally Posted by mercutio View Post
    Hesitation can show a lack of loyalty.
    I think he must have thought I wasn't serious about it or something. Actually I was putting it off to wait for the right moment to be sure that the plan would work. Timing is everything.
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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    I think he must have thought I wasn't serious about it or something. Actually I was putting it off to wait for the right moment to be sure that the plan would work. Timing is everything.
    Then say that. Being responsive is a valueable trait. Ignore the people who say that try and turn it into "power games" of making each other wait.

    And just make a sudden move.

    BTW, that reminded me. You should bring up "something" that you want to change about his behaviour or something suddenly to him, in the same way that he kind of pressured you for not being serious in something he wants. You can pressure him for not being serious in something that you want

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    Quote Originally Posted by mercutio View Post
    Then say that. Being responsive is a valueable trait. Ignore the people who say that try and turn it into "power games" of making each other wait.

    And just make a sudden move.

    BTW, that reminded me. You should bring up "something" that you want to change about his behaviour or something suddenly to him, in the same way that he kind of pressured you for not being serious in something he wants. You can pressure him for not being serious in something that you want
    haha, that would be fun.
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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    haha, that would be fun.
    you better not do it then.

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    Quote Originally Posted by mercutio View Post
    you better not do it then.
    why not? I'm not allowed to have fun? :wink:
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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    why not? I'm not allowed to have fun? :wink:
    well, if you start wanting to have fun, other people might get the idea, and want to have fun too. and then what will happen? everyone will want to have fun. and then how would any work get done.

    you better be the serious one.

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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    I've noticed that certain people (well, males mostly, so maybe it's a gender thing) are better and keeping different areas and/or people tidy in a box and not really allowing them to spill over into other areas of their life. Why is this and is it type related? And if so, what function allows it? I feel like it's hard for me to stop myself from integrating everything and everyone.

    Actually, its a biological difference between the male and female brain.

    The hemispheres of the male brain are more loosely connected than the female brain. This leads males to section off thoughts into discrete compartments, whereas women have trouble separating their thoughts based on task. The trend is men being able to concentrate easier and women to multi-task.

    I got this from some documentary i watched on the difference between the sexes. There was alot more stuff, but I forgot it.
    The end is nigh

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    I do this a lot, almost to a fault.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ArchonAlarion View Post
    Actually, its a biological difference between the male and female brain.

    The hemispheres of the male brain are more loosely connected than the female brain. This leads males to section off thoughts into discrete compartments, whereas women have trouble separating their thoughts based on task. The trend is men being able to concentrate easier and women to multi-task.

    I got this from some documentary i watched on the difference between the sexes. There was alot more stuff, but I forgot it.
    oh, cool! thanks, very interesting.
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    It's a guy thing. I never multi-tasked in my life. Yet all the women I know juggle about 50 things at once. I'd rather dive in something purely, and know a few things really well rather than try and take on the whole world. I think women are also naturally more curious as well.

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