What are ESTps attracted to in INFps? (IEI-SLE)

[Suz]

Ok i am still unclear on this. . .what, practically, do SLEs appreciate or find attractive in IEIs? (besides our beauty. . .)

[Heinel]

I'm just guessing, but I think it's that you explode when being teased. :wink:

[Suz]

I'm just guessing, but I think it's that you explode when being teased. :wink:

Explode with laughter, or anger, or tears???

[redbaron]

warmth and honesty of emotional expression (creative Fe), default intense dreaminess (Ni base) and mostly, our natural worshipfulness of their Se.

[JuJu]

IEIs make SLEs feel loved and admired--and SLEs need that... They also help them to have perspective, and (at best) a feeling of meaning in their lives.

[JWC3]

They do the weird stuff.

[JWC3]

Everyone needs that.

You don't understand.

[Morcheeba]

Everyone needs that.

exactly, it isn't type related silly people.

[JuJu]

Everyone needs that.

What I mean is that they need expressed Fe... Whether love or just genuine emotion... They also need Ni, which is what I meant by perspective (which can lead to "meaning.") They need imagination, etc.

Each Sociotype needs something different to feel "understood" in the necessary way.

LOL JWC3... yeah, the weird stuff

[redbaron]

They do the weird stuff.

:wink:

[Suz]

exactly, it isn't type related silly people.

oh no. . .not morcheeba with her "BUT IT"S NOT TYPE RELATED!!!!" dogma

[JWC3]

exactly, it isn't type related silly people.

Alls I'm saying is that when you don't feel loved do you become devil incarnate bent on the destruction of all individuals who glance at you the wrong way?

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

What do SLEs like in IEIs?

Their penises.

[JuJu]

What do SLEs like in IEIs?

Their penises.

Aaaaand we're done here...

Thanks for coming everyone.

(no pun)

[JWC3]

Aaaaand we're done here...

Thanks for coming everyone.

(no pun)

LOL!

[silverchris9]

Alls I'm saying is that when you don't feel loved do you become devil incarnate bent on the destruction of all individuals who glance at you the wrong way?

SLEs like IEIs because we secretly (or not-secretly) think this kind of stuff is cool, whereas someone else might be a) scared, or b) confrontational in return. Also we express ourselves with the real life equivalent of smiley faces, which makes it much more obvious how we feel and stuff. Or maybe that's just me. Also also, has anyone seen the "Where the Wild Things are" movie? It's exaggerated, but one might be able to take some lessons about IEI-SLE relations from the example of the relationship between Max (the IEI) and Carol (the SLE). Neither Max nor Carol exhibits all the traits of an IEI or SLE such that they could be typed as such, but a lot a lot of their negative tendencies may reflect the negative tendencies of IEIs and SLEs (Carol certainly becomes a "devil incarnate bent on the destruction of all individuals who glance at him the wrong way" when he doesn't feel loved).

SLEs might like to be a little scary, and IEIs might like to be a little scared (makes things exciting/less boring), and they give each other the chance to express this tendency in a playful way. Also, SLEs are somewhat similar to caretakers, but not in the lame Si my-grandmother-likes-to-cook-for-her-grandchildren way, but more in the protector way, and IEIs can be a good "cause" to protect (there is a grammatical error in this sentence, but I am far too lazy to fix it).

I think of SLEs as people who are extremely capable but often need to find a reason to use these capabilities (i.e., a cause). IEIs, on the other hand, can dream up a thousand causes, but can't necessarily get started doing them without an impetus. Well, the IEI can provide the SLE with a cause (or connect what he/she is currently doing to some big pretty universal significance at the core of the heart of Being with a capital B), and the SLE can provide the IEI with the impetus he/she needs to actually get up and do something.

Also, individuals of other types might expect SLEs to provide frequent pronouncements of their relationship to that individual, or at least submit to assessments of a relationship. With IEIs, there's no such need, because we basically know everybody's internal state with Ni, to the point that some people become downright boring because of their predictability. SLEs generally do not, I am happy to report.

Also also, IEIs generally make good assistants because while other types might be resistant to Se orders, we just like being along for the ride and are glad to do whatever the SLE asks (as long as they are gentle, as it says in one of the type descriptions on wikisocion). [Te rant]We do not, however, react well to cheerful "suggestions" that we do something we're already doing differently because that way is inherently better [/Te rant].

But yeah, honestly, I don't know what an SLE would see in me, nor how, really, to attract an SLE woman/girl/female (much to my chagrin). But, as we all know, socionics is magic, and if you just act like you, SLEs will like it. For some unknown reason.

What do SLEs like in IEIs?

Their penises.

. That was an inevitable joke. Cheers for getting to it first.

[ArchonAlarion]

What do SLEs like in IEIs?

Their penises.

fuck i was gonna say that

[Heinel]

if you just act like you...

Yeah that's the mystical part. It's not as easy as it sound though.

[Suz]

Yeah that's the mystical part. It's not as easy as it sound though.

Yeah exactly, especially when everyone else expects you to be different from yourself. So, like if I'm just meeting someone and perhaps dont know yet that they're SLE, I'm going to be in Ni overdrive trying to figure out how to relate to them, and not necessarily using a whole lot of Fe.

I can see how SLEs might not understand this about IEIs though, because SLEs seem to just be themselves from the outset and not care what others think of them (actually the SLE I know came right out and SAID this to me).

[Heinel]

Yeah exactly, especially when everyone else expects you to be different from yourself. So, like if I'm just meeting someone and perhaps dont know yet that they're SLE, I'm going to be in Ni overdrive trying to figure out how to relate to them, and not necessarily using a whole lot of Fe.

I can see how SLEs might not understand this about IEIs though, because SLEs seem to just be themselves from the outset and not care what others think of them (actually the SLE I know came right out and SAID this to me).

Argh, Yes. EIEs aren't much better either. They have completely unrealistic expectations and when you call them on their BS they get super defensive and hate you like you just killed their parents.

I actually didn't mind that part about it, but how can be so deluded as to deny it even when the facts are straight in their face? Sigh...

[JuJu]

Argh, Yes. EIEs aren't much better either. They have completely unrealistic expectations and when you call them on their BS they get super defensive and hate you like you just killed their parents.

I actually didn't mind that part about it, but how can be so deluded as to deny it even when the facts are straight in their face? Sigh...

LOL... I think you're onto something, Heinel... I've actually had this said to me...

[smccosker]

easiest nicest people to get along with imo when i think of bullets and doves..granted every "infp" is different of course

the socionics theory is practical if the typings are indeed correct

just remember any theory will not stand w/o good framework
just like u cant build a house w/o a good foundation it will collapse same principle i suppose this is my (Ti)
always loved playing with this "system"

[Dionysis]

Ok i am still unclear on this. . .what, practically, do SLEs appreciate or find attractive in IEIs? (besides our beauty. . .)

They would like the fact that you are open to new possibilities. You would like that they are always trying to find the reciprocal of the situation no matter the outcome. You two would be good together, but i would be careful as their ability might not lead to the conclusion that you are looking for.

Hope this helps.

Cheers!

[Morcheeba]

They would like the fact that you are open to new possibilities. You would like that they are always trying to find the reciprocal of the situation no matter the outcome. You two would be good together, but i would be careful as their ability might not lead to the conclusion that you are looking for.

Hope this helps.

Cheers!

Being open to new possibilities is more of an imo; but it would be quite strong in the IEI of course. Also, being careful of someone's abilities really isn't a big issue in dual relations; each covers the others weak points in such a way that you can't get too far away from eachother's expectations.

[Dionysis]

They would like the fact that you are open to new possibilities. You would like that they are always trying to find the reciprocal of the situation no matter the outcome. You two would be good together, but i would be careful as their ability might not lead to the conclusion that you are looking for.!

I would like to clarify. SLE is looking to solve any problem with an open mind or attack the situation with a new perspective ( Open to new possibilities in my interpretation). IEI seem to always try to make the situation to the positive or to their liking (the reciprical). They are not duals in this (as far as I can tell as ISTj seems to be the dual of IEI or ENFj) Honestly I could be wrong here. If so let me know.

On the point of expectations you can get as far away as you would like. It all depends on what you are comfortable with being able to cope with in your partner (at least that is my interpretation)

Cheers!

[jughead]

What are you talking about here...istj is dual of infp or enfj...what? No. ESTP-INFP are duals aka SLE/IEI. ISTJ and ENFJ aka LSI/EIE. Soooo have you read socionics or are you just talking about your own experience?

[Dionysis]

What are you talking about here...istj is dual of infp or enfj...what? No. ESTP-INFP are duals aka SLE/IEI. ISTJ and ENFJ aka LSI/EIE. Soooo have you read socionics or are you just talking about your own experience?

No you are correct about the duals and I am incorrect. I had misread the information. As I have stated earlier I am learning and I do appreciate the correction.

Thank you,

Cheers!

[Joy]

They're soft, cuddly, warm, cute, and always seem to say just the right thing. They defuse stress and brighten up people's moods. And they're appreciative of those with a strong will, organizational intelligence, and a knack for logistics.

[Gilly]

Warm and bright are not really words I would use to describe IEIs. Maybe sometimes, but not as a pervasive trait.

[redbaron]

Warm and bright are not really words I would use to describe IEIs. Maybe sometimes, but not as a pervasive trait.

maybe CAN be warm, CAN be bright. It's that creative Fe, the ability to use it when we want to.

[Joy]

It's warm in a really relaxed, accepting way. Not in a Miss Mary Sunshine sort of way.

[Suz]

Now correct me if i'm wrong. . .

But reading through this and after a lot of philosophizing and studying the IM elements, I am really impressed that you SLEs appreciate how we make OTHERS feel. Not necessarily you. Which confirms my already present suspicion that SLEs are selfless and caring people. I'd already observed this in action though, despite SLEs protests that they are otherwise.

[Joy]

Now correct me if i'm wrong. . .

But reading through this and after a lot of philosophizing and studying the IM elements, I am really impressed that you SLEs appreciate how we make OTHERS feel. Not necessarily you. Which confirms my already present suspicion that SLEs are selfless and caring people. I'd already observed this in action though, despite SLEs protests that they are otherwise.

As for me, I just made it sound like they're like that in general instead of just to me because I assumed others felt the same, lol. Or at least that SLE's do. I was speaking out of my own experiences though.

I do think I'm a caring person though in that I want the best for everyone, but not selfless. I believe that it is ultimately each individual's responsibility to see to their own lives. I do like getting others what they want when it's easy for me (and it often is, as long as it's not too time consuming), but it's to show off or to make myself likable. Or because I just like seeing them have what they want. It's still about me though.

This is the case for everyone though... Even those who make anonymous contributions do so knowing that they'll know that they did. It's still about them. It can't not be. They ARE them.

I also don't like to see people hurt or upset, though I'm not always good at preventing this as I unintentionally tend to be somewhat cold and demanding. (It's hard not to be a bit demanding when you're trying to get something you or another person wants! ) But IEI's (and other types, too) offer me advice to help me out in that area.

IEI's are also really forgiving of my Fi/Fe mistakes, laughing them off where others are likely to say I was being obnoxious or insensitive.

[silverchris9]

IEI's are also really forgiving of my Fi/Fe mistakes, laughing them off where others are likely to say I was being obnoxious or insensitive.

Truth. Fi-polr is almost always hilarious. Also, sometimes it's like seeing that a superhero is human, but I suppose that's my Se-adoration coming out.

Also, @Mimosa, . I wish I had a better response, but in general, I liked that post. Especially the coconut.

[Suz]

Mimosa, your post warmed my heart!!!! And makes sense of so many things!

[redbaron]

yeah Mimosa, that was great. Wow.

[Ezra]

I really don't know you know. I have no real reason to like them. It just seems every one I meet means a lot to me.

[Joy]

Maybe you just haven't been with one yet?

[Joy]

Imagine that when you're just acting normal someone is like "omg that's so awesome!" and is really warm and appreciative when to you it's no big deal. And the more you just relax and act like yourself, the more they seem to like you.

[Reuben]

IEI's are stupid. There's no better reason my friend.