I think no matter what type or quadra, we all feel this way at some point. Man, I was frustrated for a long time just hanging in that limbo, never getting to move forward. I filed for divorce myself a year and a half ago, and it's still just hanging in place not finalized, not moving forward. And a whole new set of circumstances arose to deal with. I think what finally got my perspective to change was realizing that I'm not trapped. I don't HAVE to do anything, and I can do anything I want.
It's you know, like that quote "a wise man will be prepared to abandon his baggage several times in a lifetime" or something like that. There wasn't much more holding me to my particular circumstances than fear; fear of letting go of one branch in case there isn't another one to grab hold of. Finally I realized that I'll be okay no matter what happens. There's always been a net to catch me, I trust there always will be. It's like what you said about feeling like you're treading water. Thrashing around in the water, and you stay in place, but if you stop and float, you can glide anywhere you want.
Another thing, don't compromise on what you actually want for fear that you won't get it. Go for it, and see what happens.