Member Questionnaire (squark)

[squark]

q2

[Sol]

http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...=1#post1096450

[squark]

http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...=1#post1096450

Oh, I don't care about being typed. Thanks though.

[Beautiful sky]

I love you Squark

[Sol]

I don't care about being typed

being correctly typed

[squark]

I love you Squark

:-)

[Sol]

:-)

she loves only your money and cat

[Beautiful sky]

she loves only your money and cat

What? Lol

I don't know if squark has either

[Beautiful sky]

:-)

I love your money and your cat mostly I want your cat.

[Jeremy8419]

Sexual innuendos everywhere!

[squark]

I love your money and your cat mostly I want your cat.

Well, it is a very nice cat.

[Beautiful sky]

Well, it is a very nice cat.

I'll take it. It's mine!

[Myst]

I don't think I want a partner. I was reading this the other day https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...u-single-heart and realized most of these things apply to me.

I can be obsessive about relationships, and I very much like sex (who doesn't) but when I really think about what I want and when I'm happiest, I realize that I like being alone and making my own decisions far too much. When I think about things like marriage, it's always with a sense of dread, a sacrifice that I might make for someone, but not something I'd choose for myself. And when my relationships have ended, regardless of how devastated or sad I might have been at the time, I eventually feel a sense of relief. I've had lots of romantic notions and ideas of how things could or would or should be with someone, but in the end, I think I like just being me the best.

Didn't you type as sx/sp before?

(I relate to the personal mastery part at that link but not to the idea of just being single at heart, definitely not. People have seen me as sp/sx before but I don't think so...)

[Myst]

A pretty significant relationship had just ended when I wrote that post. You do what you need to do to cope with things, yeah? In other words, telling myself that because I've felt relief when certain bad relationships ended, that I would eventually also feel relief that this one had was to help me get over the pain of it. I do have a lot of personal work to do before I even consider another relationship though. I get a little too entangled in people, it's hard not to lose myself in a relationship. I don't want to lose myself. I like me. I like being me, and getting too enmeshed in someone else means a lot of the things I like best about being me get lost. The personal work I need to do involves rebuilding my self-esteem, and my self-respect and being separate, not overinvolving myself or giving more to other people of me than I keep for myself. And I need to be alone to do that.

Recently I've been reading a bit about Dabrowski's theory of positive disintegration and his ideas on overexcitabilities, and wonder how much overlap between sx and these various overexcitabilities there are. http://rediscovering-yourself.com/li...browskis-eyes/ Ignore the term gifted as it's rather loaded terminology. But when I'm seeing intellectual, emotional or imaginational overexcitability in myself or others I have been calling it a manifestation of sx. Maybe there is some overlap, or maybe I need to separate the two things better and am conflating them too much.

OK I see. I just was surprised because when I read that link I thought it was crap, from the standpoint of sx-first. I mean maybe it works for sp-first types or something but definitely not for me. When I am alone, I do have myself as a main priority, which is a conscious rule for me really for protection purposes, but I also have no problem with the idea of losing myself with someone else. I see no problem with it, it does not have anything to do with self-esteem and self-respect for me. For me the priorities for the partner mesh with my priorities for myself in a neat, almost mysterious way, though I am able to consciously reason for it as well, and I like that the way it is.

As for your new link. I don't care for this gifted crap, yeah, I do have some of the so-called overexcitability but I'm not willing to call it that, it's only "over" from the standpoint of worrywarts that want to shoot down all excitement. So I relate to this but not to the idea of being gifted and being in conflict with how things are. I'm smart and have talents but not this kind of "gifted". So this part would not relate to sx but the excitability and introspection qualities may.

[Myst]

Like I said, ignore the term, since it's rather loaded, and they should find a different one to use. Just bad terminology. I'm not surprised that you don't identify with the bulk of it. I've only known a few other people in my lifetime that have been like this to the same degree. So yeah, not something that's super-common I easily identify with several of the overexcitabilities listed and most people (certainly not just worrywart types) have wanted me to tone down and not have such an obsessional nature. It's definitely a more-ness or an over-ness that doesn't fall into the normal range. If you were any of these, you'd know it. You get used to hiding it after awhile, but as soon as someone even marginally gets to know you (in real life) they will notice, and make some comment.

Sooo, it may be along the lines of : these people are likely sx, but not all sx people are quite like this kind of thing.

I think there is a slight misunderstanding. I relate to the excitabilities part. Apparently that's the only thing you relate to too. So I see no difference between us. If you didn't get it the first time then let me repeat, yes, I have been told shit like, I should tone myself down, be careful, don't overdo it, blahblahblah. That's why I referred to these people as worrywarts.

PS: did you ever see my last PM?

[Beautiful sky]

I think there is a slight misunderstanding. I relate to the excitabilities part. Apparently that's the only thing you relate to too. So I see no difference between us. If you didn't get it the first time then let me repeat, yes, I have been told shit like, I should tone myself down, be careful, don't overdo it, blahblahblah. That's why I referred to these people as worrywarts.

PS: did you ever see my last PM?

I think squark was asking you to ignore some of the specific words (like "overexcitability") that you don't relate to. But you relate to some?

[Myst]

I think squark was asking you to ignore some of the specific words (like "overexcitability") that you don't relate to. But you relate to some?

Um I think you misread accidentally

No, I related to all of it, not just the excitabilities. I absolutely relate to the inner conflict, and knowing that I have huge room for growth and that I can do so much more than I have or am. I am not at all satisfied with things as they are, and most definitely want to improve, feel driven to improve. I want to find out where my limits really are. I want to be great. And I don't mean that I want other people to see me as great or any bullshit like that, I actually want to BE great, in myself, and reach ideals that I have. I want to do amazing things, and I am disappointed and frustrated with myself because I know I can do more and do better.

Hmm ok just the whole thing seemed very intuitiveish (in the jungian sense) and that's what I didn't relate to. I don't think I have much inner conflict myself, no, I've got peace with myself pretty well, while I'm still willing to change what needs to be changed... so, I do relate to some parts about improvement etc.

I don't like the term "gifted" because it sounds pretentious, like you think you're better than other people or something, and don't want to label myself with something like that, but I fit the descriptions, and always have. And it's not some emo thing, like "oh I am so special and misunderstood" either. But some things I've read lately on the subject (not this particular link) made me cry, because it was just a "Holy shit, that's me and maybe I'm not as fucked up as I thought," and then a lot of questioning and evaluating, and considering and asking things like, "How much is real, and how does this help me? What does this mean? Can I use this or not?"

As for PM, I thought I had responded, will double-check.

I'm not sure I fully understand the article tbh but I only skimmed the rest after it talked about the excitabilities and the introspective process which I do relate to. I just don't do the introspecting by questioning everything unnecessarily. I just observe my internals without any expectations, live through that observation, come to an understanding then or sometime later. Repeat process. And so on. Also I have no problem with many society related expectations, I don't try to be different for the sake of being different. That to me is slightly too... aimless. Trying out extreme diets and religious beliefs as external solutions to inner disharmony is something I'm totally NOT interested in, lol.

Ah, btw, I'm not trying to say it's shit or stupid. I just can't relate to that part, is all.

PS: thanks for the PM check

[Myst]

What is beauty? What is love?
Beauty is what appeals to the senses or sentiments. I don't really know what love is.

You still knew what love was here: http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...naire-(squark) ?

(Not nitpicking, just wonder why the change in opinion if that's OK)

[Persephone]

You still knew what love was here: http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...naire-(squark) ?

(Not nitpicking, just wonder why the change in opinion if that's OK)

Lolandthenyousayouarenote1andifeversquarkIlikyouas lsise

[Myst]

Lolandthenyousayouarenote1andifeversquarkIlikyouas lsise

Hm before you only two people were considering 1 for me. Couldn't make anyone else see it as even a remote possibility. I myself think it's not as simple as that - enneagram really oversimplifies things.

I don't really see how that has to do with this post of mine tho' since as I said it wasn't nitpicking

I couldn't read the last part of your long line Can you rewrite it for me please.

[squark]

You still knew what love was here: http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...naire-(squark) ?

(Not nitpicking, just wonder why the change in opinion if that's OK)

I was being emo because of life stuff.