If you were coming to my house

[pianosinger]

If you were going to be a guest at my home, here's what I would do to prepare for your arrival...

I would vacuum all floors. I may or may not scrub the kitchen and bathroom; depends on whether or not it looks like it needs it.

I would clean the sink and toilet in the bathroom. And put out clean hand towels. All guests deserve to use a clean bathroom.

If I have not dusted in the last month, I will dust all visible surfaces.

I will wash all dirty dishes, prior to cooking (if I am serving dinner). I may or may not get around to washing any utensils used in the food prep.

I will clean kitchen counters and the dining table.

All toys will be put away-- or possibly just tossed-- into the boys' room.

If there is cold or rainy weather, I will make sure there is a place to hang your coat on the coatrack, and a place to put your boots by the front door.

My bed will be temporarily piled with stuff to get it out of the way-- clean laundry, bags and backpacks, extra blankets, unsorted mail and magazines...

Oh, and I will probably have various lighted candles around the apartment.

Things I will not bother with:

I will not wash the windows.

I will not clean the blinds.

I will not shampoo the floors or furniture, nor will I spot-clean. My carpets are stained and I don't care-- that's just what happens when you have two little boys and carpet under the dining table.

I probably will not vacuum the couch, though if it has recently been peed or spit-up on, I will be sure to lay out a clean blanket over where you will be sitting.

I will not bother to put away the clean (cloth) diapers which reside in the living room.

I will not dust the houseplant.

[DirectorAbbie]

If I were coming to your house...

I would enjoy using your restroom.

I would not sit on your couch.

I would be impressed by your coatrack.

I would wonder why you lit candles and consider the possibility of a link between the candles and the dirty windows.

I would bring a snackable dessert item so I wouldn't have tu dirty your dishes making us one.

[pianosinger]

I would not sit on your couch.

I know, it's nasty. Actually, I've got blankets covering it pretty much all the time right now...really need to have it shampooed...

I would be impressed by your coatrack.

No. Your wouldn't. lol

I would wonder why you lit candles and consider the possibility of a link between the candles and the dirty windows.

I light scented candles to mask the odor of the dirty diapers and laundry...and the couch, too, I suppose

I would bring a snackable dessert item so I wouldn't have tu dirty your dishes making us one.

Why, thank you, that's very thoughtful.

[Pa3s]

This reminds me of

[DirectorAbbie]

No. Your wouldn't. lol

I would. I've never used a real coatrack before.

[pianosinger]

I would. I've never used a real coatrack before.

Oh. You poor deprived soul...You live where it's warm year-'round?

[DirectorAbbie]

Oh. You poor deprived soul...You live where it's warm year-'round?

No. It was freezing last month. I hang the sweaters I'm not using in my closet and throw the others over a chair.

[pianosinger]

MegaDoomer, my son loves that song now

[Park]

Ok, so who are you inviting?

[CILi]

If you were going to be a guest at my home, here's what I would do to prepare for your arrival...

If you were coming to my house...

I'd ask you to clean it.

On-Topic: I'm agog you'd do so much for a visitor; but, hey, maybe it's a Mom thing. (Mine's much the same.)

Do you have a feel, maybe, for why you'd put in all that effort/thought/consideration/etc. for a guest?

[Skeptic]

Oh jeez that's so much trouble to go through. Better to leave the crap about and let them navigate it if they will - tell them to get protective lenses if it hurts their eyes so much. But I guess if you're doing the whole hospitality thing it makes sense..

[Creepy-male]

I would make sure you find the destination, giving directions, or pick you up, or make arrangements for your arrival.

upon arrival I would offer you a drink, refreshment, or something similar..... a cigarette, a cup of coffee, a tall glass of water, a beer, a cup of tea, a joint, or something.

preferably to be enjoyed in a relaxing area while conversing about what to do with our time, usually something adventurous.

after this arrangements would be made for your stuff, your car, your coat, any belonging you have with you... then we would partake on whatever it is we will be doing with our time, or simply just relax and hang out.

.... Mind you this is purely hypothetical, right now I don't have a house lol

[The Ineffable]

Do you have a feel, maybe, for why you'd put in all that effort/thought/consideration/etc. for a guest?

Yeah I'm thinking the same. I understand *somehow* why people do this, though, because I know such people and, let's say, they way they look at things or something. So to me the question is more like "why cats hunt birds" .

[Absurd]

If you were going to be a guest at my home

I would have a chat with you.

[Simon Ssmall]

If you were coming to my house id either make coffe/tea or open a bottle of beer/wine/whiskey, depends on your preferences.

What I would definately would not do is anything with my room, unless there would be dead animals laying on the floor and two year old socks standing in the corner.

[Creepy-male]

If I'm having a guest around who will need somewhere to sleep, throw out anything in my room that needs throwing out, and make sure there are clear paths to places. Also lay down nice clean sheets so they have somewhere really nice to sleep.

Make sure there's enough equipment for feeding.

I'd also shower and wash my hair (something having a ponytail has allowed me to be lazy with, fu fu fu), but if I'm just having a few several couple drunks then I'll probably just stop at a shampoo... or a rinse if it hasn't been too long since my last good hair-washing.

Maybe go out shopping, either beforehand or with the person or people in question (grog or supplies, like fruit juice or impromptu dinner ingredients).

Vacuum anything horrifying off the common area that my flatmates might have left behind.

Clean up any dishes that are needed as they are needed.

[Creepy-bg]

if you were coming to my house....

I'd hope that you had smokes, because I don't have any

I'll offer you a drink or food if I happen to get thirsty or hungry, otherwise just ask.

I'll make a token effort to gather up my dirty clothes and put them in a clothes hamper, and say something in passing about how i hope that my room doesn't smell.

I'll be expecting that you're bringing some drugs.

If you sleep here, I won't be able to sleep because i can't sleep when other people are in my space, so you better bring enough of something for me to be high all night.

If your a girl, you can sleep on my bed, otherwise you get the floor (but my carpet is really comfy to sleep on)

you can use my computer if you bring me drugs to keep me entertained while i have nothing to do.

I won't be sympathetic to how dope sick you are.

I'll probably try to get rid of you sometime in the morning, unless I really like having you around.

I'll probably jones you to leave me a bowl of whatever drugs you brought when you leave.


generally I'll be friendly, accomidating (with whatever you ask for), and sympathetic if you need to talk about something.


I'll get annoyed if you're loud, drink too much, or try to make me drink.

[717495]

I light scented candles to mask the odor of the dirty diapers and laundry...and the couch, too, I suppose

This would probably make it smell worse.

[FDG]

If you were coming to my house id either make coffe/tea or open a bottle of beer/wine/whiskey, depends on your preferences.

What I would definately would not do is anything with my room, unless there would be dead animals laying on the floor and two year old socks standing in the corner.

Lol. same.

[pianosinger]

Ok, so who are you inviting?

You, obviously.

Oh jeez that's so much trouble to go through.

Really? I figured I was only doing the bare minimum...I mean, I have a grandmother who puts my housekeeping to shame. And I have friends who go to a lot more effort than I do.

Better to leave the crap about and let them navigate it if they will - tell them to get protective lenses if it hurts their eyes so much.

And this is the kind of house that people would not want to visit twice if they didn't already love you...

But I guess if you're doing the whole hospitality thing it makes sense..

This. Though, there are certain people (mostly family) who have been to my home often enough that I no longer go through quite the same amount of effort for them. So really, it's more of a "first impressions" sort of thing.

[Slacker]

I would be horrified if people came over and my house was a mess. And we have a friendly neighborhood where people stop by all the time! So I have to clean all the time. It sucks. But it's always pretty clean here.

[Absurd]

What I would definately would not do is anything with my room, unless there would be dead animals laying on the floor

I had a dream like that. Not only dogs were dead, they were hacked to pieces, and I had to clean that up.

[Aleksei]

If you were going to be a guest at my home, here's what I would do to prepare for your arrival...

I would vacuum all floors. I may or may not scrub the kitchen and bathroom; depends on whether or not it looks like it needs it.

I would clean the sink and toilet in the bathroom. And put out clean hand towels. All guests deserve to use a clean bathroom.

If I have not dusted in the last month, I will dust all visible surfaces.

I will wash all dirty dishes, prior to cooking (if I am serving dinner). I may or may not get around to washing any utensils used in the food prep.

I will clean kitchen counters and the dining table.

All toys will be put away-- or possibly just tossed-- into the boys' room.

If there is cold or rainy weather, I will make sure there is a place to hang your coat on the coatrack, and a place to put your boots by the front door.

My bed will be temporarily piled with stuff to get it out of the way-- clean laundry, bags and backpacks, extra blankets, unsorted mail and magazines...

Oh, and I will probably have various lighted candles around the apartment.

/ valuing extrovert.

Things I will not bother with:

I will not wash the windows.

I will not clean the blinds.

I will not shampoo the floors or furniture, nor will I spot-clean. My carpets are stained and I don't care-- that's just what happens when you have two little boys and carpet under the dining table.

I probably will not vacuum the couch, though if it has recently been peed or spit-up on, I will be sure to lay out a clean blanket over where you will be sitting.

I will not bother to put away the clean (cloth) diapers which reside in the living room.

I will not dust the houseplant.

...and not EJ. Your type is right.

And yeah, all this is type-related.

[Pa3s]

MegaDoomer, my son loves that song now

It's because the song's about getting candy, right?