Type this couple

[Expat]

She's very clearly ESE.

He's a Se dominant, SEE or SLE. I'm inclined to go for SEE. A SEE of what I might call "Lyndon Johnson subtype".

As SEE-ESE quasi-identicals, I'd expect them to have gotten together by circumstances (ie sharing same hobbies, lived in the same place, worked in the same place) and by physical attraction rather than by a "meeting of soul mates".

Each will find the other "stupid" in different ways.

[FDG]

Mmhmhm...ESFj with ESTj?

[ScarlettLux]

Mmhmhm...ESFj with ESTj?

I would change the ESTj to Gamma extravert.

[FDG]

I would change the ESTj to Gamma extravert.

but...I don't think an ESFp would be so "cold" and focussed on working all the time without the socializing component...and at the same time I don't think an ENTj would be so deeply focussed on the physical details of work...

[Expat]

They actually met when he was her patient, as she's a nurse and he was in hospital for 3 months...

Which makes perfect sense for her as ESE. Gave her a chance to be a Caregiver and he had no chance to show he was Aggressor.

I agree they might not be soul mates, but he once told me that he talks better with her than with anyone else, so I'm not sure, even though it looks like a series of misunderstandings and disappointments from my point of view.

I'll trust your observations rather than that one comment of his. Which may have been said in a "oh she's not so bad" kind of way.

I connect a little better with him than her, but I've known him for longer, so I trust him more, even though I now meet her more often than him. He's a bit older than I, and has always given me great advices when it comes to interacting with people in business life. He always tells me to relax, and don't care so much, and it actually helps a lot. He choses his words with a lot of care when he talks to me about such things, and I don't think he gives such advices to people unless he really likes them, so I think he likes me too.

I won't deconstruct that into functional preferences, but to me that is consistent with both SEE and LSE.

He's ethical in the common understanding of the word (not necessarily in socionics)

Too vague.

I think maybe I put too much emphasis on his explosive nature. I think people who hasn't seen this hidden side of him will think he's always very collected and calm. I just happened to see it by coincidence when going to visit them. It kind of surprised me, but I didn't feel his explosions were "dangerous", they were more "useless", as if he just needed to get out some frustration. I might put my own experiences in that interpretation, though.

On the contrary, I think it's important. It's in moments of crises that you revert to your true functions (unless you're really mentally ill). Can anyone imagine an EII, LII - or maybe any intuitive type - releasing frustration, in anger, by trashing a kitchen with his own hands?

He looks open and welcoming and has a boyishness yet an incredible softness/calmness/wisdom about his face.

Too vague. You see, these are things that you see but it's difficult for others to see what it actually means.

but...I don't think an ESFp would be so "cold" and focussed on working all the time without the socializing component...and at the same time I don't think an ENTj would be so deeply focussed on the physical details of work...

I think ESFps, especially men, can be very pushy and little socializing if focused on work.

On the other hand, a LSE would not be likely to disregard Si pleasures and things as he does (not care about food, etc) nor being so adept, even unconsciously, into adapting his mannerisms etc to whomever he's talking. Nor do I think LSEs are that likely to release anger by destroying things physically. In my opinion, those who think that misunderstand LSE as a type. To put it another way: would that be a normal behavior for the dual of the EII? No matter how frustrated and angry?

Finally, the overall picture of their relationship as Mimosa Pudica portrayed seemed to be like there's barely understanding beyond the surface level:

Their interaction seems to be good, but she often complains he doesn't "talk" and he doesn't involve himself enough. He complains that she pushes him away and is too manipulative.
- She seems to try to "wake him up" with stingy little comments sometimes. He seems to withdraw when he finds her "stupid", not to criticize her in public.

Such things are difficult to measure, but to me it sounds like there's a fundamental clash in quadra values. So quasi-identity - especially as they seem "quite capable" together when trying to accomplish something like building the house - seems to me the best fit, unless further information moves away from that picture. I'd expect a LSE-ESE couple to get along much better, and to appreciate each other more.

And if I'm correct, they'll either going to settle for low-key misery, or eventually split.

[redbaron]

your parents??

[Creepy-Pied Piper]

Removed at User Request

[redbaron]

Why ""?

well, it's sad when parents get divorced, don't you think?? Even when it's for the best.

[redbaron]

tbh, I think they should have divorce a LONG time ago. The sad thing isn't that they are divorced. The sad thing is that they now both want to "live" their "lost lifes", and they have ended up in a really childish state where they do not want to have visits from their grandchildren, seemingly because it will inhibit them in their own quest for whatever they think they are going to get back from the years lost in not leaving eachother sooner. I really, really hope it's just a phase, and that they will reconnect with my kids soon. The EII is the one that is the most interested in them atm. How weird isn't that...

And I'm so not going to be a pawn in their stupid game...

you're right, that is very sad.

[Creepy-Pied Piper]

Removed at User Request

[Trevor]

Nor do I think LSEs are that likely to release anger by destroying things physically.

hm..I don't know for sure is this universal LSE trait, but I've seen my LSE father doing that few times. For example, he once got mad on my mom(EII) and released his anger by kicking a frozen chicken with his leg which made a hole in the door. The other time he was trying to reach my sister(SEE), calling her on her cellphone, but in vain because she delibarately turned it off. When she returned home he destroyed her phone by throwing it at the wall.

[Trevor]

I don't think he's LSE, though. He's just too smooth, competitive, empathic, independent, catlike, etc to be anything like the square, up-tight LSEs I know. I'd say he looks/moves/appears like a mix between George Clooney and Colin Farrell, who I think are both Se-egos? I find him extremely hard to nail down, typewise, and he's definitely close to me in type - I've thought him any type I've thought of for myself.

He's very similar to my grandfather whom I've already typed as a Se-leading(which one?).