If not, what type do you think is?
What type of guys is most likely to be players? ESTps?
If not, what type do you think is?
yes, ESTps are the type most likely, in my experience, to be players... second is ESFp.Originally Posted by songofsappho
gay sex
Last edited by istpunk; 07-17-2008 at 06:12 PM.
lol so only INTj, INTp, ISTj, INFj, and ISFjs are not players?
I agree with this. The SEE recognises that others have feelings, so they won't fuck and run like SLEs will.
Good way to know is eye contact. If lots of times he can't seem to look you straight in the eye when he says anything about he feels about you, it could be total BS and he could be a player.
Have you ever known someone with Fi dual seeking?
Females similar to their cousins? What does that mean?
Posts I wrote in the past contain less nuance.
If you're in this forum to learn something, be careful. Lots of misplaced toxicity.
~an extraverted consciousness is unable to believe in invisible forces.
~a certain mysterious power that may prove terribly fascinating to the extraverted man, for it touches his unconscious.
This is what makes me wonder how the IEI would handle the "player" - ness of a typical SLE.
Perhaps - be so elusive & mysterious that the SLE is driven to craziness trying to nab that IEI. Then eventually, over time, (and lots of victim/aggressor games) ... the SLE realizes that the IEI is special, different. This is because the IEI is not just some easy to get girl that the SLEs usually conquer without a fight.
Then, all hell breaks loose as it usually will as the SLE reverts back to player-dom. The IEI is heartbroken and cries, making a total fit. The SLE actually realizes shit, I hurt IEI's feelings! Then, the IEI will play hard to get again, punishing the SLE for a good while so that the SLE realizes they will not get that special feeling from anyone but the IEI.
Kiss and make up.
Wash & Repeat.
Me too.
Again, I ask, how old are you? You might want to rethink the way you say things.
In high school, I admit, I was kind of a playa--but it made me feel pretty badly about myself... It was more about appearances than anything--keeping up w/ my friends, if that makes any sense.
Maybe other ENFps were like this before their values were fully formed..? (I stopped acting like this during college.)
In general, however, I don't believe that ENFps are players... We might come across as flirty though.
I think this is one of the reasons for the infamous IEI "hot and cold" behavior that so frustrates people who actually want to get to know them (and hence all the threads complaining about IEIs in romance), but actually protects them in the long run. If someone is willing to put up with this crap, there's a decent chance they're not just trying to play you.
"How could we forget those ancient myths that stand at the beginning of all races, the myths about dragons that at the last moment are transformed into princesses? Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."
-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet
FWIW, the ESI guys that I know are actually pretty talented lady killers. The good-looking ones at least.
"How could we forget those ancient myths that stand at the beginning of all races, the myths about dragons that at the last moment are transformed into princesses? Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."
-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet
Yup, I agree with this. Good-looking male ESIs--most of the ones that I know are young professionals, e.g. bankers, lawyers... They seem to be a big hit with the ladies.
There's nothing wrong with being a "player" if you're clear about what you want, i.e., telling the person "I don't want a relationship." However, it seems many players lie and cheat in order to string along many people at once, and that's not nice.
I've dated many guys who were looking to play the field: ISTP, ENTJ, ESTJ, ENFP, ENFJ and ENTP. This leads me to believe that all types can be players.
Types would just have different reasons for wanting to be a player (variety, attention, fear of loneliness, etc). However, people who lie, cheat, or play are no more likely to be one type than another.
I don't agree that ESFPs are players. I dated an ESFP for years who was totally committed. But, he put on an act that he was some tough guy, etc., so that sort of behavior may lead people to think of ESFPs as players? I dunno.
I've never considered myself a player, but there was a time that I dated a lot (because I was looking for the right guy). To the outside observer, it could look like I was a player because I was dating several people, and an ESFJ guy accused me of being one (but later realized I wasn't, and I was only trying to decide who was a good guy). I also had an ENFJ guy accuse me of that after I was talking to a bunch of people at a party. He got mad that I made everyone feel "special." I didn't see how that was a bad thing.
It's all about the intent behind something though.
Hi! I'm an ENFP. :-)
I think there's a difference between being a "player" (which has negative connotations; trying to "play" someone inherently means you're trying to fool them/use them for sex) and just being sexually open. But it seems like a lot of these people end up playing people who are just as into one-night-stands as they are so it probably doesn't make that much difference unless you happen to be the unfortunate one-in-a-hundred who is actually looking to hook up but gets played by someone who it turns out isn't.
"How could we forget those ancient myths that stand at the beginning of all races, the myths about dragons that at the last moment are transformed into princesses? Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."
-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet
My guess is that istpunk is hopelessly stuck with MBTT descriptions and interpretations.
Paul Newman, Herzy, Paul Newman.Interestingly enough, I haven't actually been able to type any guys as ESI. I'm not too concerned though.
You gotta love a guy who sticks his face on a sauce jar.
He's so Fi he likes the Mexicans more than the Mexicans like themselves:
And he has an appreciation for Italy:
He's even a bit of history buff:
ESI: multi-purpose wonder.
Paul Newman was super hot.
Extremely attractive man.
And his Balsamic Vinegrette is the best dressing ever made.
I don't know which part in particular you're objecting, but about female SLIs, it's sad but it's true. I know an SLI female that is a plain bitch. Good thing I didn't want to get involved (even if she was trying to get close) because knowing how many guys she has bed, I would probably had contracted AIDS or something.
But in defense of my beloved duals, I recognize that the life of pretty much all the SLIs I know is pretty fucked up. I know two SLI-ESI couples and I know that life is a nightmare. I know another whose parents divorced when he was a child and was never allowed to see his sister and mother again. Other who grew up without a father. I tend to believe that such behavior is a manifestation of escapism (like an addiction to drugs) more than anything else.
[]
| NP | 3[6w5]8 so/sp | Type thread | My typing of forum members | Johari (Strengths) | Nohari (Weaknesses)
You know what? You're an individual, and that makes people nervous. And it's gonna keep making people nervous for the rest of your life. - Ole Golly from Harriet, the spy.
It takes quite a lot of strength for an IEE to go against the opinions of others. They do a lot of things to please and feel drained because they later realize it's all fake. The best thing an IEE can do is to analyze, detect and protect what they really want, despite that it makes them unpopular in the eyes of others. They think they will not be liked if they do not conform, but they often forget that they'll get far more respect for themselves if they fulfill their own desires instead of those of others.
And yes, IEEs are seen as flirty. I've hurt many girls by making them to believe that I have interest in them to later realize that I don't. They often interpret it like there is a fault in them and I changed my mind while the fact is that I'm simply overly friendly with nearly everybody.
[
You know what? You're an individual, and that makes people nervous. And it's gonna keep making people nervous for the rest of your life. - Ole Golly from Harriet, the spy.
I uz condumz, mikemex. ur wrong.
Your sampling is not large enough.
Ain't that the truth!!!
I love it when threads have a 'voice of reason' moment.
I asked a female friend of mine today "Are you a whore?" and she said yes. What else do you need?
[
You know what? You're an individual, and that makes people nervous. And it's gonna keep making people nervous for the rest of your life. - Ole Golly from Harriet, the spy.
Generalizing iz fun.
You make that sound like a bad thing!
What does this mean though? Does it mean that she actually is a whore? Or that all women of her type are whores? Or even that women of her type tend to be whores?
Even if she is a "whore", that says nothing about her type.
Any type can be a whore. Hell even women who aren't particularly whorish now could've gone through a "OMG PENIS" phase.
Did you read his post?
pretty much
'Tis pretty tastiliscious ideed.
They are totally players! But convoludedly so...
Similar story...I also dated an ESTP guy...He would boast about everything from how much money he has to how awesome his social & party life is...The thing is, while everyone bought into his superficial charisma, I saw right through it, because of the vibes I got from him. I felt very uncomfortable around him, but I sensed that he felt very alone and that the only thing that gave him a sense of worth is boasting about himself. I too thought there was a nice guy underneath it all.
Later on, and perhaps shooting from the hip, but from a place of compassion, I called him on it.
There were numerous other times when I saw right through him and called him on it too...although face to face, he denied any of the accusations I made, and I'm sure it created some resentment. I think the fact that I could read him like a book scared him, but at the same time intrigued him...Although nothing materialized between us, he started showing up at my work place with someone different every time, flashing money and expensive clothes, in an attempt to impress me with material goods and perceived popularity...*sigh* if only he knew that those kinds of things put me off people, not attract me to them...It's kind of funny but tragic at the same time.
I'm also an ENFJ and I always trust the vibes I get from people. It's hard to put a finger on it...Most people attribute "vibes" to hundreds of body language clues that you're subconsciously processing, but I have to admit, there are times that I can't shake that gut feeling about someone when I have no evidence to support those intuitions.
Another thing that I've recently noticed, is that I *think* I sometimes pick up people's emotional states and feel them myself...like a chameleon...but I'm not sure...
ex..
Hypothetically, if someone around me feels insecure, and there are no outward signs of it, i'll feel insecure too...even though I'm not one to usually feel insecure or have reason to in that situation...What do you think? Has anyone ever experienced that?
This happens to me too. I find it usually works against me because instead of being independent I quickly become almost "tied" to the state of someone else. I've learned to almost "block" this to a degree but when I do this people accuse me of being cold and selfish and my self-worth diminishes. And when I do give into it (i.e. with the last girl I did anything with) I've found, when relations end and the truth comes out that they actually didn't come close to knowing who I really was. Also people tend to project their own characteristics/traits upon me which pisses me off.
INFp-Ni
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