Guys... share your experiencesI'm ENFp in a weird situation with ENFp. Do you think it can ever work?
ESTp and ENFp super-ego relations (SLE-IEE)
Guys... share your experiences
Is it really love for a person or is it simply an idealization?
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| NP | 3[6w5]8 so/sp | Type thread | My typing of forum members | Johari (Strengths) | Nohari (Weaknesses)
You know what? You're an individual, and that makes people nervous. And it's gonna keep making people nervous for the rest of your life. - Ole Golly from Harriet, the spy.
Sex with SLE's (women) is fantastic, but at some stage a big bang will occur.
“I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.” --- Pippi Longstocking
???Originally Posted by consentingadult
bumpageee
<Crispy> what subt doesnt understand is that a healthy reaction to "FUCK YOU" isand not
I think that means an explosive break in the relationship.
LII-Ne
"Come to think of it, there are already a million monkeys on a million typewriters, and the Usenet is NOTHING like Shakespeare!"
- Blair Houghton
Johari
Topic says ESTp, and here you say ENFp. Make up your mind woman.Guys... share your experiences
My mom and dad are ENFp and ESTp.
...the human race will disappear. Other races will appear and disappear in turn. The sky will become icy and void, pierced by the feeble light of half-dead stars. Which will also disappear. Everything will disappear. And what human beings do is just as free of sense as the free motion of elementary particles. Good, evil, morality, feelings? Pure 'Victorian fictions'.
INTp
Typo, I suspect. Change the last "ENFp" to "ESTp."
LII-Ne
"Come to think of it, there are already a million monkeys on a million typewriters, and the Usenet is NOTHING like Shakespeare!"
- Blair Houghton
Johari
Superego, eww
Good luck with that one.
Jess, what happened darlin'? You used to LOVE IEI's.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
When I was an idiot, yeah
ESTp and ENFp super-ego relations (SLE-IEE)
i am IEE female and currently in relationship with SLE man. even though i know socionics i do not believe in excluding people based solely on the type of the socionics personality and so gave this a chance. so far has been good in he treats me well most of the times, there is the mutual attraction, and we are passionate together, though may be too passionate in some ways
things have progressed very quickly to point that he sees me as his one and only, meanwhile i have my doubts as to our long term feesibility as couple. is a lot and is scaring me to be so intense as he is! SLE says i am his angel and loves how sweet i am, as he was bit of a bad boy in his past, but i think he will one day be finding my sweetness and delta ways to be not what he wants, maybe too laid back for his go go go style. and by same token, he is maybe too much for me in is activity
there you have my background informations
my questions are this. is this common for SLEs to fall hard for IEEs this way, is he picking up on my NF and because i am a quiet IEE mistaking me for his dual?? we are superego, relations of mutual respect and even idealization, i think maybe he does idealize me in a way i am not, is this something common with SLEs and IEEs? i admit i idealized him too in the beginning, even now i see his ST and like it very much, but it is not the type of ST, Si and Te, that i need as IEE
thank you for reading and in advance thank you for responses, am trying to figure this out including if i must break up with him, how to do it, will be very sad and very hard if comes to that point
Are you sure he's SLE?
Stan is not my real name.
Obviously you want to break up, so why don't you go ahead and do it.. Is it common for superegos to be attracted? I haven't seen some remarkable trend. I can tell you it's common for ENFps to be very easy to sleep with. And if he is the kind of person who mistakes hornyness for love, then that would explain everything. Anyway, you're wasting time. Go break up with your boyfriend.
Superego relations, unlike conflict relations, are supposed to be relationship of mutual admiration. I can't think of any women I've typed as definitively or likely SLI, but all the guys I know that are SLI I do have a sort of I-could-never-do-that-and-would-never-want-to-but-I-can-still-see-why-it's-good admiration for. One is crazy principled and really practical and focused, and another is great at the around-the-house type tasks that I'm so dreadful at and ignorant of. So I can see how the relationship would be great for a while. The thing is, eventually, the conflict of priorities is likely to become a problem. I can admire achievement through practicality and focus, just as my SLI friend admires my ability to achieve through random bursts of insight and very abstract thinking. But we don't really value it in each other, and so, to steal an MBTI concept, in a relationship, an SLI and I would probably enact a bit of a "Pygmalion Project"--we'd each try to convert the other to our way of doing things. I'd be like, "chill, don't work so hard or focus on such minute details; try to intuit the whole picture and then go from there." Whereas the SLI would be like, "dude, you need to get down to the basics and build your way up from there, focus on the practical details, and while you're at it, you should probably fix that sink."
Now, obviously, these aren't the issue's you'll have with your SLE, but they'll probably be similar in nature.
But in general, you shouldn't break up with someone because of socionics. You should break up with someone because it isn't working, then see if socionics can help you explain why and how it wasn't working, sort of a sideways phenomenology of interpersonal relationships. So as long as you're both happy and feeling fulfilled, go with it! You could very easily be mutually mistyped, or not acting fully out of your ego, repressed from childhood, etc. But if you start feeling like you're not getting what you want out of the relationship, if you start feeling like the relationship isn't positive or isn't meeting your goals, or whatever, then maybe look to socionics to see if it can explain some of the problems. Decide if you want to try to fix them, and if you don't break it off. It'll be sad, but it'll be worth it; you shouldn't stay in a relationship that isn't going to make you happy/fulfilled in the long run.
Now, as to whether or not it's common for SLEs to fall for IEEs... well, I think it's common for every type to fall for every other type. Maybe you have similar underlying facial structure to his mother/female relatives, maybe you said some words he really needed to hear, maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe. There's a thousand reasons he could've fallen so hard for you. Maybe you're just a really cool person. Maybe you're really really hot. I dunno! The point is, don't type him 100% based on the fact that he's in love with you. Consider other factors. If you want a socionics reason for some of the things you described, SLEs do frequently want something to believe in, a cause or a reason to do something that seems beautiful or transcendent or whatever. You may be providing that for your SLE; this could be at the root of his idealization of you. But if you are really IEE and he's really SLE, the theory predicts that you're not the ideal source to fulfill that need of his, and that you'll eventually get tired of him expecting that from you. Now, you may prove the theory wrong. But that's what's predicted. So yeah, that's my two cents. Feel free to ask more questions if I've been of help and if you want, but if I haven't been helpful, please ignore it all.
Not a rule, just a trend.
IEI. Probably Fe subtype. Pretty sure I'm E4, sexual instinctual type, fairly confident that I'm a 3 wing now, so: IEI-Fe E4w3 sx/so. Considering 3w4 now, but pretty sure that 4 fits the best.
Yes 'a ma'am that's pretty music...
I am grateful for the mystery of the soul, because without it, there could be no contemplation, except of the mysteries of divinity, which are far more dangerous to get wrong.
as far as this question goes. I'm inclined to say yes. Of the potential 3 SLE's I know of that is just how it happens. A fall in, and out, of romantics quickly.
I just feel like I've done something to make you think that I care about you, like what you do or say. . . For that I am sorry
Consider that you may actually be EIE.
I used to think my girlfriend was IEE, turns out she was an obvious EIE.
ENFp and ESTp?
So I have a new friend who I'm pretty sure is ESTp. We get along muuch better than I normally do w/ super ego though...
She definitely seems like an ESTp (though very feeling-ish for one) -- I of course wondered if she was ESFp, but there's no way she is, and she loves my INFp friend.
I can tell she values Fe a lot.
However I'm at a loss as to why this ESTp and I get along so well (without hardly any of the weird super ego tension), where as most of the other ESTps I know honestly scare me a bit with their intensity.
It doesn't even bother me when she "protects" me in various situations, standing up for me, etc., where I'd usually be annoyed by that.
I'm curious to hear experiences about super ego or this specific one.
I'm pretty sure we're probably both enneagram 7s, or something similar as that's the vibe when we go out.
Hi! I'm an ENFP. :-)
Superego partners have totally different humor and often cannot sincerely laugh about eachother jokes. Even though there is a lot of chemistry...
But you'll end up fighting in superego relations, it just takes at least half year to get to that stage. And then it will never stop anymore. I know this from an SEE who was married to ENTP for 8 years.
Try to observe how the humor goes in your relationship. I'm curious if you can notice it.
Last edited by Jarno; 04-09-2010 at 09:07 PM.
My personal experience with SLEs is quite good, espcially with female ones. If an IEE and an SLE have interest in each other (e.g. romantic or sexual), I believe they can somewhat modify their behavior by using their Id blocks more. This can even create strong feelings of satisfaction. But when interaction gets too close one of the two will at some stage revert to their ego-block behavior (do a PoLR-hit) and in the eyes of the other, do something faux-pas, and shit will hit the fan.
“I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.” --- Pippi Longstocking
good to know!
But come to think of it, maybe some people are better at adjusting to get along w/ others?
Yeah I notice when we hang out for hours and hours I do get tired of using Fe and need to re-charge for a while. But when we go out, she talks to such a variety of people that it's not all on me.
And we do like to go out a lot and both have lotsa energy, though she has even more than me!
Hi! I'm an ENFP. :-)
My best friend is SLE. It's not perfect but it works.
Stan is not my real name.
you know, i always start off really liking SEE's, too. it's when we start to get closer that the problems begin. as a matter of fact, invariably, i'm attracted to SEE's. they're quite warm and outgoing, hard not to notice. good with people, and friendly.
i think essentially what happens is that you think you have your activity partner. superficially, they seem like your activity so you like them. then you get closer and you start to have misunderstandings based on these expectations. like SEE can seem like she has the Fe since she's so outgoing and bubbly...but really this is just EP temperament paired with Fi creative. so when i expect the Fe, i end up disappointed. she expects the Te...and gets Ti, smack right in the polr.
dunno...i'm not explaining it that well, but i think the problems start when you start to get too close. there's really no problem with these relations as long as you don't get too close.
ILE
those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often
Energy and having fun together are not the problem. Problems start when you have to closely work together, or when it turns out you hold different values and can't reconcile them, e.g. when in a romantic relationship. I can imagine that friendship would work for IEE/SLE, especially between women.
I have a good female SLE friend as well, and we can have fun (seeing movies and documentaries) and interesting conversations together. Socionics also helps me te keep the right distance, but even then we already had a major misunderstanding when I tried to help her create a web site for her business. Lots of misunderstandings and even mistrust on her side, which wasted a lot of my time and her eventually having the site done by another friend, which yielded imho a very ugly esthetic result (bad font rendering) and a site that couldn't be indexed by Google.
Also note what Jarno said about the humor. I often find that SLEs have humor that I think is sort of anti-social. To give an example: the forementioned friend was dumped by her BF about 10 months ago, because he found her boring. In January he contacted her again, he just left hospital recovering from a brain stroke. When she told me this, it was like, "hahaha, serves him right! Now he is the boring one!" I said nothing, but thought that even though he dumped her, it was not a nice thing to laugh about such a serious injury and wish another person such bad things.
I don't know if 'anti-social' humor is a trademark of all SLEs, but I myself do have that impression.
“I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.” --- Pippi Longstocking
I think that you can get along with anyone that has general personality traits that you like and creates a sense of common ground via interests or other things. Just because they are in the opposite quadra means they live in completely different world. I'd say the conflict will come when either of you make decisions or act in specific ways that involves the other, for example, if you were going to go on a trip and had to plan activities or whatnot. Having meetings time to time might actually be all that you're capable of, and when you start to spend an extended amount of time with one another, expecting certain IEs after a while, that's when the trouble with start.
IEE-SLE
How would that play out romantically?
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
What? YOUR SLE X-wife was IEE? YOUR? LOL never knew you were married before and you were SLE...
He wanted an NF....but doesn't know which because he doesn't know himself well enough to know that on the surface they are all good with people....
She wanted a Te...hard worker...work oriented....to inspire her to work harder too...
yes, we are not the showering type but we do show mild affections through hugs and such. the operative word here is showing rather than showering. Second part is related to the ENFp's subconscious desire for a dual so the mind does what the dual would do for her...
And there's the PoLR of the SLI. Great story Starfall
Dual type(as per tcaudilllg)
Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?
I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE
Best description of functions:
http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html
Good sex, great misunderstandings, lots of acting a certain way for it to be enjoyable.
Looking for an Archnemesis. Willing applicants contact via PM.
ENFp - Fi 7w6 sp/sx
The Ineffable IEI
The Einstein ENTp
johari nohari
http://www.mypersonality.info/ssmall/
I dated an SLE once, like when I was in college or just after. He dumped me for another girl. And that is what I remember most, so not much help.
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.-Mark Twain
You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.
Thank you, all! This sounds totally ridiculous, but I have typed my SO as SEE, but sometimes wonder if he might be SLE. He is the hardest person to type I have ever met. I was hoping I could figure it out by seeing if our conflicts might be IEE-SLE related.
I generally have no problem distinguishing between the types, but he is such a mystery.
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
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