Joke of the day

[Simon Ssmall]

An ENFj girl loves me because she sees me as stable, mature and serious. She wants stability in her life and it seems she sees it in me. What the hell , when I heard it I was like "Wait. WHAT???".

It is surely not the first time people see in me what they want to see and not what I am. Question to other ENFp's would be...Does it happen to you? Why do you think it is? I realise we are contradictory but then I would expect people to see first that we are contradictory and not something else like stable or planning or whatever different people attribute to me.

[implied]

An ENFj girl loves me because she sees me as stable, mature and serious. She wants stability in her life and it seems she sees it in me. What the hell , when I heard it I was like "Wait. WHAT???".

It is surely not the first time people see in me what they want to see and not what I am. Question to other ENFp's would be...Does it happen to you? Why do you think it is? I realise we are contradictory but then I would expect people to see first that we are contradictory and not something else like stable or planning or whatever different people attribute to me.

my first thought of you would have never been "stable."

[Simon Ssmall]

my first thought of you would have never been "stable."

Yeh it is the first time I heard something like that. However it is not the first time I got attributed weird things. I am very far from stable, thing is she knows what is my current job which is miles away from stability yet she still attributed those things to me.

[tiny_dancer]

Maybe she's reading a more consistent emotional state. That could be considered 'stable.' And serious.

I think IEEs tend to believe our ups and downs and faults are more visible than they are. Everyone's faults are visible to some extent, of course, but I think we feel like they're totally out there for everyone to see. Which is why we think "wtf?" when people compliment us on something because we don't feel that way at all. (This could be entirely a personal thing. I'm not sure.)

[Simon Ssmall]

Maybe she's reading a more consistent emotional state. That could be considered 'stable.' And serious.

I think IEEs tend to believe our ups and downs and faults are more visible than they are. Everyone's faults are visible to some extent, of course, but I think we feel like they're totally out there for everyone to see. Which is why we think "wtf?" when people compliment us on something because we don't feel that way at all. (This could be entirely a personal thing. I'm not sure.)

Yes she is more emotionally unstable than me so I guess my calm could be interpreted as stable and serious (well I'm really not ).

I went "wtf??" when I was complimented for that since it come totally out of the blue and is very alien to my character. I didn't say anything to her but I was very confused.

[implied]

Yeh it is the first time I heard something like that. However it is not the first time I got attributed weird things. I am very far from stable, thing is she knows what is my current job which is miles away from stability yet she still attributed those things to me.

i agree w/ tiny dancer, maybe your emotional stability is what she is referring to. and yeah i do see ENFps as highly contradictory, fwiw. anyhow, my first thought was more like, "not stable at all." so whatever ENFj is bonkers.

[tereg]

fwiw, I've had similar things happen to me a few times in my life and I've had a similar reaction.

[Ritella]

Ummm. Is the EIE psychotic or bipolar?
IEEs are NOT stable.

[tiny_dancer]

Hm, you know EIEs actually strike me as more stable because they pursue their goals for a looooong period of time. The ones I've known have, at any rate. I knew one who decided to become a patent lawyer when she was in high school. I lost touch with her after college and then found out that she is one now. Same with 90% of the other ones I've known. They start something and then build on it with only minor changes in direction. To me, that's stability. I may have chosen a major in high school, but I never felt that I knew that much about it to really understand what I was getting into or whether I would like it once I got into the working world.

[Park]

my first thought of you would have never been "stable."

LOL

IEEs are NOT stable.

Well, to me they are.

[marooned]

I thought an ENFp was stable once, long ago.

Hah, and yes, it was emotional stability.

[Park]

Maybe she's reading a more consistent emotional state. That could be considered 'stable.' And serious.

Yes, in contrast to the intermittent outbursts, melodramatic displays and emotional "phases" that EIEs typically go through for instance.

Hm, you know EIEs actually strike me as more stable because they pursue their goals for a looooong period of time. The ones I've known have, at any rate. I knew one who decided to become a patent lawyer when she was in high school. I lost touch with her after college and then found out that she is one now. Same with 90% of the other ones I've known. They start something and then build on it with only minor changes in direction. To me, that's stability. I may have chosen a major in high school, but I never felt that I knew that much about it to really understand what I was getting into or whether I would like it once I got into the working world.

I see what you're saying. And while 'stability' is definitely a term with wide meaning, different types have a different approach and put different importance to what they regard as stable. I, for one thing know that I value emotional stability, sensitivity and loyalty in others, which is part of the reason why I "need" Fi ego individuals in my life and find myself naturally attracted to them. This is also why Fi-creatives are my socionics complementaries.