Emotional expresson and personal interests of ISTps
I think I'm si-SLI (tentatively), but yeah, my interests are kind of "feeler" ish (stereotypically speaking) like Tolvard mentions. I'm a little confused myself if I'm SEI. I'm more into music, but I did try to go to acting workshops at one point. It turned out to be kind of frightening (just for how much "Fe" was required for many exercises) and I left.. but I can see some SLIs pushing through stuff like that.
Just because you have "feeler" ish interests doesn't mean you can't be SLI at all! I read somewhere that SLIs make excellent actors because they have very refined emotions, and a tight control over them should they choose to express them. My friend made it into a top caliber acting program at a university, before he got bored and moved onto something new. Which is quite "IEE" ish of him I spose. My Outward Bound instructor this past fall was a Si-SLI and was the coolest person I've ever met. I felt sure he was a feeler before I got to know him. He has a very "go with the flow" attitude and just sort of does what he wants in an unobtrusive manner. The funniest things that I have noticed in every SLI I have known is their strange reactions to random stimuli and their precise manner of performing even simple tasks. For example, my friend hand makes his ham and cheese burritos in the way you would expect a heart surgeon to perform triple bypass surgery. Or he will be sitting apathetically on the couch one moment, and will suddenly start flipping out about how excellent some guitar riff is that we're listening to is. Anyways, SLIs are the coolest!Originally Posted by stray
That was a negative, in my case. Too much control. I had raw emotions with some subjects, but after awhile, I couldn't get anything out. Real actors can do more on cue. Some of her exercises were all about dropping inhibitions and not controlling yourself.. unleashing different expressions at will, regardless of what you really felt. I mean, she'd put you on the spot and make you act like a monkey in front of people. I can see why socionics might label Fe types (or the EIE) as actors. I realized just how incompetent I was there. I was one of those people who'd say "Oh.. acting.. I could do that", but it was a different experience in practice. Way too much pressure for me at least.
The interesting distinction that needs to be made I think is that SLIs are very self conscious about their emotions. Which is why maybe, Stray, you recognize the raw emotionality in yourself. SLIs definitely have emotions, they just dont think it's appropriate to show them (or they are self-conscious and insecure about how they show their emotions, or both).
Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx
I find that with Fe PoLRs, the issue with feelings isn't so much that they're uncomfortable expressing them or that they aren't seen as appropriate, but rather they tend to be highly selective as to who they open themselves up to. If they're comfortable being around someone, they'll be much to express themselves much more easily than around someone who they don't like. I hear a lot of non-Fi types talk about IXTps I know as if they're stoic or unapproachable people, but whenever I'm around them they're generally pretty open and engaging. I do like stoicism in people though, it gives me the impression that there's a lot more going on underneath the surface; those IXTps are probably the E5s.
idk... I'm highly selective as to who i open myself up to. I think that's an Fi-valuing thing.
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FWIW, this is pretty spot-on.
Much of my emotional expression is filtered through Fi, and it all depends on the context as well. I find myself much more outgoing and expressive at work, because networking and bullshitting is a necessity for getting things done. To be relevant to the job, you have to be emotionally 'available' - you need to make the right noises so that people join your 'team',
SLI/ISTp -- Te subtype
I feel like I'm too cheery and happy for SLI...sigh....
Self-perception isn't our strongest suit?
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
that's exactly what i was going to mention...
Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx
yeah cuz sometimes when I think I'm being really expressive it's just like a blank slate lol who knows
I think I've given up on trying to figure myself out and how I come across. I have no idea how people see me, and it's easier to just don't give a fuck about it. Because there's always going to be a huge gap between how I feel and what most people perceive.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
Yeah i think both of these statements apply to pretty much everyone, not just SLIs. That's what socionics is all about.
Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx
It might be introversion or Ip-temperament or something. I get asked "Why are you angry/sad?" a lot... I'm not angry or depressed. That's just my normal [sleep-deprived] face.
"How could we forget those ancient myths that stand at the beginning of all races, the myths about dragons that at the last moment are transformed into princesses? Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."
-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet
Yeah, some people expect you to advertise your emotions all the time. I get asked questions like "aren't you happy?" or "doesn't that make you excited?", and when I tell them "yes", they can't seem to comprehend why I keep a straight face and don't jump around like a monkey.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
God I hate this with a passion. Actually nothing can infuriate me more than someone asking me this question. I get so self conscious and awkward feeling.
lol, yeah, that happens to me, too. Especially with Alpha SFs. I have to admit, though, I would find it a little funny if you just answered "Yes" about being excited, without even cracking a smile, lol.
"How could we forget those ancient myths that stand at the beginning of all races, the myths about dragons that at the last moment are transformed into princesses? Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."
-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet
I do smile, although those questions don't exactly make me want to smile at the person who's asking them. They either annoy me or make me feel uncomfortable. Usually both.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
Few weeks ago someone I work with asked me "Why are you so serious? You should be really happy now that [this and that] happened.", and I responded with "Why do you think I'm not happy? And who says I need to advertise how I feel?". She just paused for a second and went on with her business. I could tell she didn't get anything from what I said. Haha.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
That is kind of a weird question ("Why aren't you happy?"). I don't understand the sort of person who would ask that. It's not like you're going to be able to make the person feel happy by asking them this awkward question. It would just put them on the spot. You might as well go: "I command you to feel happy!"
"How could we forget those ancient myths that stand at the beginning of all races, the myths about dragons that at the last moment are transformed into princesses? Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."
-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet
Yes. And in this instance I WAS happy/content, she just didn't see it ON MY FACE.
That way at least you'd make me laugh.You might as well go: "I command you to feel happy!"
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
It's irritating how entitled those sorts of people think they are.
I also think that those aren't SLI-exclusive sentiments, but I was kinda surprised one day to find out that people actually have weird ideas about my personality. I didn't know where those were coming from, it's like they are just assuming things and going for most superficial impression they get. They said they'd never know whether I'm serious about something or not, but this was never a question for me. Maybe that's because I tended to talk to them like I do with close friends and family, who know me well enough to know what I mean.
„Man can do what he wants but he cannot want what he wants.“
– Arthur Schopenhauer
I find with SLIs most of the time they do seem rather cold and distant on the surface. Though, that is a complete facade as once you break through their shell, they're usually very warm and genial. That's what I love about them as they seem so mysterious and unwelcoming on the surface and once you discover who they really are, they're actually really interesting and open people.
“We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.” Randy Pausch
Ne-IEE
6w7 sp/sx
6w7-9w1-4w5
A friend of mine once criticized me about being "aloof" but there's a really good reason I do it. Sometimes I'm not even conscious I'm doing it, but when I do it on purpose, it makes the ones that "break through" really important people because not many people can...not many people I find worth it to get to know, honestly. If someone can break through these huge ass barriers I put up, that shows they're in it for the long haul. I guess that's why the friends that I do have now are people I'll be friends with for life. It's a great filtering tool, imo.
I got one text finally after almost a year of not hanging out with anyone. Maybe I should write them back.
That said, I've opened up in the past too much around the wrong people too. I used to get this urge to wear my "heart on my sleeve" sometimes, but it's never worked. Embarassing really.
I used to think friends didn't matter much but life is so much better with people you can be yourself around. They're hard to find, though and I don't just settle for anyone. Wearing your heart on your sleeve isn't a bad thing...eventually you'll find someone that appreciates that. I'm learning to be more open about my feelings...if only I could identify them as I feel them HA.
Exactly it does act like a filter, with the SLIs I've met. I think it must of been mythat noticed the disconnect between their persona and who they actually were. It's kind of funny to see them act cold around most people that try to talk to them, but warm up completely to me and a few others.
“We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.” Randy Pausch
Ne-IEE
6w7 sp/sx
6w7-9w1-4w5
Yeah, ironically the ones that have seen 'the real me' have always been Ne folk, I guess it's really easy to be myself around those typesExactly it does act like a filter, with the SLIs I've met. I think it must of been my
I get asked that when i'm sleep deprived too..
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lol one of my friends suddenly out of the blue tells me "you're like the happiest person I know... i'm so impressed by how happy you are all the time".
I thought that was a really weird thing to say... i kind of feel the same way as you in that i'm thinking little does she know the entire range of my inner feelings, because its not like i'll be acting all depressed even if i'm having a bad day... I wouldn't put that on my friends (or on anyone for that matter). Also i do tend to look at the up side of things so like yeah i mean i guess i am generally happy... I thought that was normal, SHE must be pretty depressed if that's the big thing that stuck out to her about me.
Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx
That was a complement I think. It indicates that you openly share your good feelings, and avoid burdening your friends with misfortune. Most IEEs I know are outwardly positive no matter the circumstances. Bad tidings are kept to yourselves, only shared with a few, never in public, never for long. Is it any wonder that the SLI is drawn to such strength of character? What other type needs so little yet gives so much.
ISTp
SLI
Enneagram 5 with a side of wings.
I mean yeah i know it was a compliment... she even said it was... She said she admired that about me. Aww well thanks cyrano... I guess that's just acting natural for me, it's not like i'm doing anything deliberate.
Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx
lol, I can exhibit the most outwardly cynical, pessimistic states towards the things I don't like or are anxious about. Positivity for me is mostly a matter of understanding everything in context, which I often forget to do and need to have people remind me of.
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