INTj as Supervisor at Work

[Iwantpeace]

Do you prefer to avoid giving feedback to others?

[chrys]

I give no feedback except for "Cool everything is finished, looks good!" or "It looks all good n neat but, I believe there may be an issue with ____, but I think it'll be easy to fix."

--- i could be LII /or/ EII so eh don't take my words, or IEI but not really.

[Rebelondeck]

......Do you prefer to avoid giving feedback to others?........

It's not that LIIs avoid it; they do not usually like it for themselves so I would think that a first inclination for them is that others won't like feedback either. They will normally give feedback quite readily if asked - just realize that they are perfectionists and can be verbally lethal so for a sensitive person, I would recommend not asking for feedback that one may not want to hear.

a.k.a. I/O

[Adam Strange]

Hi LIIs ,

I have an LII supervisor at work (my dual). She was responsible for interviewing and then hiring me.
We get along well but I have trouble understanding where I stand with her.
Despite doing work that is getting recognition from my peers, she is hesitant to comment much. Being Fe Dom I do like positive feedback if I am on the right track, or if I presented well in a meeting.
She is very nice, clam and clever so I don't mind the lack of feedback too much, but it would be helpful to receive some feedback outside my yearly review.
I had a LIE supervisor, who was very clear with me, if I was making a mistake or doing something great. I loved that!


Do you prefer to avoid giving feedback to others?
Thanks!

I have no problem giving feedback to people, but that is not your question. You are really asking how to get along better with your supervisor.

You have a dual supervisior, and when you ask her for feedback, let me tell you that you are missing a major opportunity here.

From Robert Cialdini:
Ask your boss for advice concerning your planned work, not for opinions or expectations regarding it. It turns out that evaluators who are asked to provide advice (versus opinions or expectations) on a plan are put in a cooperative state of mind before they even experience the plan, which makes them more favorable to it when they then do encounter it. There’s a saying, “When we ask for advice, we are usually looking for an accomplice.” I’d only add on the basis of scientific evidence that, if we get that advice, we usually get that accomplice. And what better abettor to have on a project than someone in charge?

[ghost of forum past]

I generally don't give others feedback unless a person asks for it. If they ask, I'll observe the situation fairly and present my conclusion. I'm not going to lie to spare feelings, but on a trivial project I might dodge the question if I know the person to be especially sensitive to criticism.

[ouronis]

Honestly, it seems very easy for people to take things the wrong way, and I don't want to sit there precisely triangulating where my criticism fits amongst all your personal doubts, and then still be misunderstood at the end of it. Because ultimately if I'm giving a thoughtful criticism, it's with your personal development in mind.

[Slimpack]

I basically agree with what everyone else said. She probably never thought that giving feedback was that important to you. I can't speak for all LII's, but in my case, when I'm not saying anything that means that things are going well and I have no problems. You should ask her what she thinks of the work you've done, and let her know that you'd appreciate some feedback so you can know if you're doing well or if there's something you need to improve on. The only problem is if you do that she might start giving you too much feedback and never shut up about it.

[draon9]

Lii is a bit more leaneant.

[Soupman]

LII are negativists, they are quick to notice when things are wrong rather than when they are going well. It's a weird fact you are gonna have to learn to accept.

[Chae]

Yes, no feedback can be good feedback when everything runs smoothly

[Exodus]

I basically agree with what everyone else said. She probably never thought that giving feedback was that important to you. I can't speak for all LII's, but in my case, when I'm not saying anything that means that things are going well and I have no problems.

Same here. It's much easier to give negative feedback.

[The Reality Denialist]

I can not speak for LIIs... maybe if you could introduce some kind of brief impersonal feedback review routine thingy to yours work. They are the analyst...

[Exodus]

But also, if somebody asks for feedback ("was that done ok?") I will gladly give it. Not in a pep talk kind of way but I will try to give constructive criticism that can include positives too. If she still doesn't provide feedback she probably just doesn't feel either way about it.