I can't speak for all SEIs, obviously...but if the ESE was being nice about including herself, and had clearly friendly motives, it wouldn't bother me much if she inserted herself into the conversation. Including people is a good feeling. Not including people and being all exclusive is a bad feeling some of the time, because in the back of your mind you wonder if the person not being included is feeling hurt or something. And actually, alot of the time it's easier when people include themselves. It's a nice surprise when you're like "oh yeah, I'm going to be obligated to do introductions and be all outgoing for a bit" but then you learn the other person is perfectly capable of introducing themselves and when they do alot of the talking, putting themselves out there, it's easier to just respond than it is to dominate the conversation yourself.
Does that make sense?
I'm not really qualified to give advice but I think a good thing to do would be to talk to the SEI one on one and tell him how you appreciate your guys special set apart time alone. Maybe you could suggest going somewhere like a restaurant or shopping or just somewhere where the ESE isn't present. I'm not sure if your schedule supports that....but honestly, I would never have the guts to tell someone straight out they were bothering me. I would feel pretty bad if I did. It seems like if you said something like that there would be alot of unecessary (IMHO
) drama.
Oh hmm. That is a bit rude to just interupt all the time.....but I don't think I would mind in most situations, if the person clearly had good intentions. It would actually make me happier because the person valued talking to me more than they valued the often silly little rules of ettiquete and formality that people often feel compelled to follow in public. Just like, how to explain it.....well, for example, if me and some friends were at a restaurant, and a friend whom I knew well kept taking my food and hitting me, (as to being all formal and polite) I would feel happy and loved. I think, at least for me, it's such a good feeling to be able to skip all the "getting to know eachother" stuff and just be good friends right off the bat, and of course if you all were good buddies you would interupt eachother often, right? (Maybe you wouldn't?)
But, if it were a serious, meaningful, personal, etc. topic, I think I would be annoyed at it being interrupted, though perhaps not as much as you. But I wouldn't show it in most cases....
Maybe you're on to something...I'm curious to hear others response to this thread.
Oh wait, if you can, try not to be sly or anything.....I mean, you're probably joking, right? But that sounds like sort of a backstabbing thing to say.....but I just thought of something. Somehow, you should tell her to leave, but in a joking, lighthearted way. Mix in the lightheartedness with a frank, sincere, "I'm telling you this because I value your friendship so much I'm being straightfoward" manner. Oh how do I explain it.....the ESE might be swept off her feet (LOL) when you use that manner. I mean, I know you don't really like her, but it's such a good feeling when people skip all the formalities and treat you like a good friend...and with good friends, it's usually pretty simple to be straightfoward, you don't have to lie to them or infuse your sentences with vehement hidden meaning.
Is this too confusing? I'm sorry.