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Thread: How did I do?

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Default How did I do?

    So a dual asked me these questions, I want to get some feedback on how I did with my answers? What do you guys think? Minde, please respond to this, thanks.



    Well, alright. So, you hate dating. I take this to mean that you dislike the sequence of stilted first-meetings, and that you are eager to get past those awkward moments and have one person you can settle in with, share activities both social and domestic.

    -That's right. I do not like the mystery of the first-meetings although I really love people and find most very fascinating and interesting to speak with; it's just that I'm not assertive enough to tell someone that I no longer want to see them, if or when I find that it's not a match. I like the old system where people grew up knowing the boys in town, from either having gone to school with them or having interacted with them in social settings like community events or church.

    Tell me a little about your upbringing/family. Where were you born and/or raised. Where did you go to school. If you're a book-worm, what kinds of books do you like to read (or, if that evolves, what did you read vs what do you read of late). What's the last book you read, current book you're reading, and next book you plan to read.

    -I was born in Armenia, came here when I was 9 and grew up in LA. My dad was born in Syria and his side of the family traveled or stayed in and around the Middle Eastern region. My mom was born in Armenia and grew up there. I went to CSUN for undergrad and took last year off on personal matters but I was in the Psychology Grad program at CSLA; I am planning to go back this following semester. I read a lot of different books; I like anything from real current issues related topics to medicine and even art. For publications, I read the NY Times, online and Newsweek.

    -Last book I read was Ivan Turgenev's First Love, the current book is Christianity by Chidester, and next one will be Love Secrets Revealed: What Happy Couples Know About Having Great Sex, Deep Intimacy and a Lasting Connection - Allen Berger


    What is the difference between a smart person and an intellectual?

    -Smart people reflect information and get good grades because they can store a lot of info and intellectual is a person who can integrate multiple factors of thought and have a well rounded conversation.

    Tell me about a trip that you took that has stuck in your head for years and years, if not for the inherent memorability of the place you visited, then for some extraordinary experience you had while you were there.

    -Let's hold off on this one until I go to my next trip.

    If you appreciate fine art, literature, and sophisticated things, do you deride with words such as 'plebeian' things such as sports watching on tv?
    -no I don't I am not a stuffed shirt, sports are not for the commoners...haha.

    Whereabouts do you live? What sort of outdoor activities do you enjoy (counting even something like breakfast at an outdoor cafe).

    -I eat out a lot and I enjoy it; I live near Griffith Park in Los Feliz and I love to hike and take my friend's dog out. When I have or make time I wouldn't mind cycling.
    Last edited by Beautiful sky; 05-01-2010 at 12:10 AM.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Default Your wall...

    is impenetrable.

    It's not that LSE don't appreciate people with ideas, they just let their Te get in the way way too often.

    Te is an interesting function, not only does it judge the external actions of others, like what they tried to do in the bus or tell you to do, but it is also a function that, in determining what is appropriate in behavior or not, puts up some nasty NASTY walls.

    Take cooking and Ne. I'm an Ne creative type, I can create ideas, from which it would be nice if someone took the suggestion and mobilized for action. When I suggest something interesting to my cousin, it doesn't have to be something big, it can be as small as adding raisons to a potato salad, she puts up this wall, "no, it will change the salad, the texture, it will make it a whole nother salad, i'm fine with what it is now, this is how I like it." i say "but, it's not going to change your salad, as it is now, it lacks depth of sensory experience, levels of interest and intrigue." After I get my stern wall for a few days, she'll decide ON HER own accord sometime later and will make the potato salad with white raisons and will come to me and say, "I made that salad with raisons, turned out well" and give me a devilish smile as if saying "please forgive me for putting up a wall, I know I was wrong" without saying that directly.

    You want to guess what I do next?
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    You want to guess what I do next?
    Ride a bike.

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    c esi-se 6w7 spsx ashlesha's Avatar
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    did you go on that date you mentioned the other night, maritsa? how did it go?

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lungs View Post
    did you go on that date you mentioned the other night, maritsa? how did it go?
    it's tonight
    he seems like a Te LSE. He's stern and has a short temper; he called me but I was on the train and couldn't take the call due to lack of reception and when I got off the metro, I returned his call, but with one short and stern response he said "I'm cooking now, we'll talk later." It's the LSE way of saying "not now" and "end of this conversation."

    A bit much to handle? IDK, we'll see.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lungs View Post
    did y...
    what do you think about the way in which my cousin handle's new ideas with her Te base wall?
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Local Hero Saberstorm's Avatar
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    why don't you get married? End this dating stuff, find you man and stick with him!
     
    God is most glorified when we are most satisfied in Him.
    - John Piper


    Socionics -
    the16types.info

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    Killer of DJA's Fun fen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    He's stern and has a short temper . . . when I got off the metro, I returned his call, but with one short and stern response he said "I'm cooking now, we'll talk later." It's the LSE way of saying "not now" and "end of this conversation."
    How about finding someone with patience and concern for how they make you feel.
    Unless you enjoy feeling unimportant. Which I really hope you don't enjoy.
    Not all LSEs are going to be temperamental, stern, and unwilling to make time for you.

    If he's not willing to make time to talk to you while he's cooking, I just...don't see this working well for you in the end.
    Speaker phone exists. Shoulders exist to rest phones on.
    If talking to you was important to him, he'd make it work, one way or another.

    I realize I'm basing this judgment on very little information about him, but come on...

    Just putting that out there.
    I don't want to see you get hurt again.
    And I would hide my face in you and you would hide your face in me, and nobody would ever see us any more.


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    c esi-se 6w7 spsx ashlesha's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    what do you think about the way in which my cousin handle's new ideas with her Te base wall?
    i dunno. it sounds like you're pretty stubborn with your ideas just like she's pretty stubborn with the way she does things.

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    Quote Originally Posted by fen View Post
    If he's not willing to make time to talk to you while he's cooking, I just...don't see this working well for you in the end.
    Nowadays everything can be blamed on lack of reception and cooking. I would just text a person and try to arrange a meet. Person agrees - great. Doesn't agree - great.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    she puts up this wall, "no, it will change the salad, the texture, it will make it a whole nother salad, i'm fine with what it is now, this is how I like it." i say "but, it's not going to change your salad, as it is now, it lacks depth of sensory experience, levels of interest and intrigue."
    Sounds more like Si than Te.
    Enneagram: Unknown
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    It does. Wait till Maritsa suggests banana salad.

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    Éminence grise mikemex's Avatar
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    You're too serious for your own good Maritsa...
    [] | NP | 3[6w5]8 so/sp | Type thread | My typing of forum members | Johari (Strengths) | Nohari (Weaknesses)

    You know what? You're an individual, and that makes people nervous. And it's gonna keep making people nervous for the rest of your life.
    - Ole Golly from Harriet, the spy.

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    Mermaid with Stellar views SyrupDeGem's Avatar
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    I hope you had a good time, i am going for dinner tomorrow night... lots of people seem to be off out for dinner .... something in the air. There are statistics which show times of the year most break ups happen, relationships start, people get married, conceive babies etc. Must be one for most dates... Valentines might skew that one a bit though.....a chart maybe

    Now this is a story all about how, my type got changed, turned upside down. Just wait for a minute and watch chatbox right there, & I'll tell how Gem became the moderator with blue hair.

    In typology central friended and praised, on the picture thread was where she spent most her days. Chilling out, selfies, relaxing all cool, And all typing some people and getting them schooled.

    When a couple of girls who were up to no good, Started annoying her & her friends in the forumhood, She got in one little flame war & got pissed off & said 'I'm moving in with that exboyfriend in the forum with the socionics toffs.

    So Gem pulls up to the forum for a year without being a hater, And yells to typocentral 'Yo creeps! Smell Ya later', Became a mod in her kingdom she was finally there, To sit on her throne as the mod with blue hair.

    InvisibruJim

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fen View Post
    How about finding someone with patience and concern for how they make you feel.
    Unless you enjoy feeling unimportant. Which I really hope you don't enjoy.
    Not all LSEs are going to be temperamental, stern, and unwilling to make time for you.

    If he's not willing to make time to talk to you while he's cooking, I just...don't see this working well for you in the end.
    Speaker phone exists. Shoulders exist to rest phones on.
    If talking to you was important to him, he'd make it work, one way or another.

    I realize I'm basing this judgment on very little information about him, but come on...

    Just putting that out there.
    I don't want to see you get hurt again.


    he said he wants to talk face to face
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nanners View Post
    Sounds more like Si than Te.
    what does?
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    i say "but, it's not going to change your salad, as it is now, it lacks depth of sensory experience, levels of interest and intrigue."
    Bahahahahaha.

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Narcotic View Post
    Bahahahahaha.
    it's true, she has very little use of Si sometimes, and even Ne, as she does things the way she used to do them continuously, with very little change outsize a comfort zone.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Ok, so here's another story...cuz I'm full of stories of our interaction.

    Um...we go to a restaurant and my Dual cousin orders a "Latin" menu; that's the theme were sticking with; so she places an order for a couple of trays for a total of 5 people and one cousin was on the way. Then she looks at me to do a detail check (like we always do) to see if what we ordered was enough and if we were missing anything, anyway, etc, and I said "you should get sweet tamales." God forbid I had said that!!! Next thing I get from her is the "look" the look of disapproval; "it doesn't fit with the taste pallent, it's sweet, I don't want to get anything sweet."

    Me: But...
    Her: No...

    Waiter comes over, she gives the order and I sneak in the sweet tamales. She gives me a wicked look and says, "I don't think that's going to go well with what we're getting."
    Me: Be patient, it might be interesting to try.
    Her: *look of disapproval, coupled by skepticism*

    The waiter brings our order and the 6th cousin hasn't arrived yet. He sets the tamales in front of my cousin and my cousin says "we should start eating." (Yes, director Love you!!!!). My cousin looks at the tamales, that don't look anything like a tamale. She likes, is highly pleased with how they've made them and takes what she likes from the other plates while being very curious to try the tamales (*I can read the eyes*). All the while, I'm trying not to look at her and just thinking *you want to try them, just try one*

    She goes for it, pulls one on her plate, muttering under her breath *we'll try one of this to see how it's like*

    When she pulls that on her plate and loves the taste, I look in her direction and give her a smile of satisfaction; she gives me her DEVILISH *I was wrong sorry for snapping at you I love you forgive me I love you smile*

    I'm like ok no big deal.

    My 6th cousin arrives and Dual says, "try a little of everything and this is sweet tamales, it's not sweet but it compliments the flavor of the spicy....." After finishing saying that, she turns around to me one more time and smiles a nice coy smile of satisfaction.

    Team work baby!!!!
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    it's tonight
    he seems like a Te LSE. He's stern and has a short temper; he called me but I was on the train and couldn't take the call due to lack of reception and when I got off the metro, I returned his call, but with one short and stern response he said "I'm cooking now, we'll talk later." It's the LSE way of saying "not now" and "end of this conversation."

    A bit much to handle? IDK, we'll see.
    Sounds like a dick
    Moonlight will fall
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    Harvest will come
    Your heart will mend

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by munenori2 View Post
    Sounds like a dick
    YES, that was the end of the date LOL
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Good call
    Moonlight will fall
    Winter will end
    Harvest will come
    Your heart will mend

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    I never run out of stories, apparently. Here's another.

    So, today, my dual cousin calls me; her voice, over the phone was like frustration/annoyance; so I made myself available because I had a feeling this was leading to somewhere. I asked what's up; she asked me "where are you?" In a half crying/frustrated/annoyed tone; I said "walking on Vermont Avenue, headed to Starbuck" (when possible be very very precise with LSE), then asked "what are you thinking of?" She went on about the wedding and how in the past she would not plan ahead and look for the right outfit and would be annoyed by not finding it and then be frustated with herself and feeling too rushed and now she wants to avoid all that and spend time looking for a dress. I said, "sure, pick me up" (she was a few blocks away. ("This is what I want to do, I'm going there, I want to pick you up in 10 seconds so be ready for me." ......got it!)

    She comes to pick me up and is going over all these stores in her mind where she thinks might have dresses; she's concerned about the stores closing at a certain time...she goes on and on about all the things that can possibly go wrong. I say, "we're here and Melrose Blvd is close by, so let's go there first."

    She: "I was looking up dresses and current styles online and I don't want to spend that kind of money on a dress that I'm only going to wear once."
    Me: "What are the current style?"
    She: I don't know; we'll see.
    Me: Ok

    We get to the first store and have two hours; on top of looking for a wedding dress, now she wants to find a dress for me and she's looking for fun dresses, and because of this she's taking a lot of visual time and we're not moving through the stores; we get to one we like, where she finds a skirt, that she will get and finds a top that had a slight irregular stitching and she professes, she can "feel" this being off and it's "somewhat uncomfortable and is going to bother me." She, having said that, I know, I KNOW she doesn't want it but loves the style but hates the irregular cut that no one on god's green earth would probably notice except for her. I feel her saying "not sure" on the inside; I can feel her hesitation like a bomb in my head but again, I'm supportive. I say "I don't think you should get it if you don't feel comfortable with it." And I say it a couple of different ways again, "I don't think if you don't feel it 100% you may be there with this shirt," "if you get it and decide to leave the tag on or you think you will maybe you shouldn't get it."

    She notices everything wrong with everything (being a negativist type) before she makes the decision; "this top has this that I don't like, this has too much lace here that I don't like, this has a slight tough here, this is this way that I don't like." (this is how LSE are with everything and probably everyone...including me...I don't like this about his person etc...whatever I've beaten my head on a stone to a coma already).

    She gets the top. We go to the car and drive off...

    She: I shouldn't have gotten that top; I'm so upset at myself; I should have listened to you; I don't understand why I ignored my gut feeling and you were only saying what was in my gut about the shirt; I don't know why I do this.
    Me: Don't beat yourself up over it; it didn't cost a fortune and like you said you can wear it with different things and on different occasions if you decide not to wear it for the wedding.
    She: yeah but if I wear it to dancing, I'm going to sweat like a pig because of the material.
    Me: maybe you won't wear it in the summer.
    She: oh well, that fine, I'll just have to deal with it; it's just that I don't understand why I do this.
    Me: trust your gut feelings; you have the capability of making good decisions based on it, I've seen it before. You get something in an instant and it works.
    She: yeah
    Me: don't feel bad about this shirt, in a few wears, you would have spent your money well. I've seen you buy tops where you haven't worn or thought of wearing them as often as you said you can see yourself wearing this one.
    She: yeah
    Me: you get caught up in over thinking it; what if you don't find something that fits than you would have regret not getting it now, what if you come back for it and they don't have it and then you'll regret it, what if this and that; so you made a choice and it was fairly prudent and be confident in it; I trust that everything will turn out well. (me, positive, positive, positive)
    She: So what will you do when you get home?
    Last edited by Beautiful sky; 04-07-2013 at 09:57 AM.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

  24. #24
    Trevor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    YES, that was the end of the date LOL
    Are you sure?

  25. #25
    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Trevor View Post
    Are you sure?
    what? yes.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

  26. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    what? yes.
    What are you confused about?

  27. #27
    InvisibleJim's Avatar
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    I hear a lot about what you think of your duals Maritsa.

    I'm more interested in what they think about you.

  28. #28
    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by InvisibleJim View Post
    I hear a lot about what you think of your duals Maritsa.

    I'm more interested in what they think about you.
    LSE cousin says I'm great to be around because I'm not about the family drama everyone creates and I let her do what she wants, lol.

    So, you, pretend to be my dual and say some things.

    I'm a whole different animal online, remember that. The frustration comes out if huge doses here and that is all that I express here; in real life, I'm mellow.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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