Which intertype relation feels energizing? Activity?
Which relation is like plugging into a wall socket, with each person getting really positively energized by the other? I'm guessing it's not dual, because those sound like they're calmer - this is actually kind of draining in a crazy way. Guessing same-quadra or at least illusionary. Activity, maybe? Mirror?
Originally Posted by Logos
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I pity your souls
Activity.
High energy:
Activity
Semi-dual
Dual
Energy draining:
Illusionary
Could you elaborate on this a little? I've heard that Illusionary relations are positive ones. If so, in what respects are they draining?
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I pity your souls
ISFps don't activate me
It's like they're always waiting for me or something
It always seems like they are waiting to be taken care of or something.
Posts I wrote in the past contain less nuance.
If you're in this forum to learn something, be careful. Lots of misplaced toxicity.
~an extraverted consciousness is unable to believe in invisible forces.
~a certain mysterious power that may prove terribly fascinating to the extraverted man, for it touches his unconscious.
I'm fairly sure my husband is my illusionary. We have a very good marriage (13 years now). It is prone to laziness, as the description states. Our "big picture" values and goals match up exactly but when we get to talking about details it becomes more difficult. His methodologies are different from mine and at times he tries to get me to do things his way. I then bristle against this, asserting my independence and an argument ensues. So instead of that scenario, we don't talk about it. An example of this would be when we both decide that we need to organize the basement. We agree that it needs to be organized, we may even share a vision of what it will look like when it's done. We agree on a timetable and a purpose for the space when it's done. But when we dig in, he wants to do it his way and I go about it a different way. He thinks my methods are inefficient and crazy and I think he's too uptight. Usually what happens is that I leave and start a different project and leave him to do it his way. That pattern can be draining after awhile, LOLCould you elaborate on this a little? I've heard that Illusionary relations are positive ones. If so, in what respects are they draining?
When it comes to talking about our interests and hobbies that don't overlap with one another (for example, he's interested in politics and law. I'm interested in art and music), we are each interested in the other and want to share these things but find that it takes lots of energy to really focus and understand the other in these areas. We LIKE each other very much (we even love each other, how about that) but we need friends outside the marriage to talk to about our own interests because it's draining to rely on each other for that. We like to just "be" together without doing a lot of talking. That sounds kind of lame and it's not that we don't talk about day-to-day matters. We just don't talk about certain things that we know the other one isn't naturally interested in. Maybe that's true of all couples, not just illusionary, I don't know. Not sure if this helps at all. He's ENTp by the way and I'm INFp.
IEI-Fe 4w3
my experience is that illusionaries don't have the same global goals but have the tools to make each other comfortable. I think this is in keeping with this relation being called deactivating, slowing and lazy-fying. Have you considered your husband being your semidual, an ESFp? Just wondering.
With my illusionary, ESTj, things can be jocular and comfortable (stagnant) but when I try to talk about something that will interest me the ESTj will shut off, first quietly and then loudly. The lack of understanding is mutual. It's a placating war. In fact, I will even say i have felt how some descriptions have said that the illusionary is someone you won't want to know further. But for some reason, you find it hard to leave. Its so.. comfortable and cozy.
Could be. I did feel like the ENTp description had several parts of it that described him perfectly but I will take a closer look at ESFp.
IEI-Fe 4w3
Yes, because the 1th and most used function of the illusionary partner is the same as your 7th used function.Could you elaborate on this a little? I've heard that Illusionary relations are positive ones. If so, in what respects are they draining?
Whenever you have to use your 7th function, you drain energy. It's just a socionics fact.
It has nothing to do that it is a nice relationship. In my experience it certainly is a nice relationship, but you also get really lazy when being with your illusionary partner.
Jarno, what about beneficiary-benefactor relationship?
In which type relations do you normally feel the tension between you and the person right away? Super-ego and conflicting?
Suprisingly enough, in real life you'll at first feel respect for eachother in a SuperEgo relation.
And mutual attraction in Conflict relation.
It is only later on (weeks/months), that the conflicts start to arise.
There is no relationship where negative tension takes place immediately. There is however a relationship which gives immediate (+/-within 5 minutes) friendship. It's activation.
The quickest respons is in my own experience Illusionary. Of which the attraction can be felt in 1 second.
In beneficiary-benefactor relations, you feel some sort of spiritual connection between the two of you.
It has once even been described on this site as most commonly mistaken for an identical relationship.
How funny is it that I actually read this the way it was spelled.
"one-th."
I recently met an ISFj who (I'm assuming here) thought I was a bit annoying at first, but has grown to respect me more over time. So, yeah, it varies.Suprisingly enough, in real life you'll at first feel respect for eachother in a SuperEgo relation.
And mutual attraction in Conflict relation.
but i have met people that i know i wont' get along with almost right from the beginning. we just have to talk and it's so so so obvious that we don't get along. and if there's no project or anything that's binding us, we don't talk to one another anymore and just nod to each other when we meet. and the feelign is mutual. what kind of relations do you think i might have with them?
yes i've had those encounters too. But most of the time then you are judging them in an objective way.
like, i don't like the loudness of how he talks. or i don't like the subject he keeps talking about. it doesn't immediately refer to a function. or better to say, you are not listen (or feeling) to how your functions collide or cooperate with that from the other person.
Either Identity or Conflict.
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