Results 1 to 16 of 16

Thread: Which intertype relation feels energizing? Activity?

  1. #1
    Elro's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Not here
    Posts
    2,796
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Which intertype relation feels energizing? Activity?

    Which relation is like plugging into a wall socket, with each person getting really positively energized by the other? I'm guessing it's not dual, because those sound like they're calmer - this is actually kind of draining in a crazy way. Guessing same-quadra or at least illusionary. Activity, maybe? Mirror?
    Quote Originally Posted by Logos
    Holy mud-wrestling bipolar donkeys, Batman!

    Retired from posting and drawing Social Security. E-mail or PM to contact.


    I pity your souls

  2. #2
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Activity.
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  3. #3
    Jarno's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Netherlands
    TIM
    ILI-Te
    Posts
    5,375
    Mentioned
    30 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    High energy:

    Activity
    Semi-dual
    Dual


    Energy draining:

    Illusionary

  4. #4
    Elro's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Not here
    Posts
    2,796
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno
    High energy:

    Activity
    Semi-dual
    Dual


    Energy draining:

    Illusionary
    Could you elaborate on this a little? I've heard that Illusionary relations are positive ones. If so, in what respects are they draining?
    Quote Originally Posted by Logos
    Holy mud-wrestling bipolar donkeys, Batman!

    Retired from posting and drawing Social Security. E-mail or PM to contact.


    I pity your souls

  5. #5
    UDP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    East Coast West Coast Dirty South
    TIM
    LSE
    Posts
    14,826
    Mentioned
    33 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    ISFps don't activate me

    It's like they're always waiting for me or something

    It always seems like they are waiting to be taken care of or something.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

  6. #6
    redbaron's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    9,321
    Mentioned
    16 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Elro
    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno
    High energy:

    Activity
    Semi-dual
    Dual


    Energy draining:

    Illusionary
    Could you elaborate on this a little? I've heard that Illusionary relations are positive ones. If so, in what respects are they draining?
    I'm fairly sure my husband is my illusionary. We have a very good marriage (13 years now). It is prone to laziness, as the description states. Our "big picture" values and goals match up exactly but when we get to talking about details it becomes more difficult. His methodologies are different from mine and at times he tries to get me to do things his way. I then bristle against this, asserting my independence and an argument ensues. So instead of that scenario, we don't talk about it. An example of this would be when we both decide that we need to organize the basement. We agree that it needs to be organized, we may even share a vision of what it will look like when it's done. We agree on a timetable and a purpose for the space when it's done. But when we dig in, he wants to do it his way and I go about it a different way. He thinks my methods are inefficient and crazy and I think he's too uptight. Usually what happens is that I leave and start a different project and leave him to do it his way. That pattern can be draining after awhile, LOL

    When it comes to talking about our interests and hobbies that don't overlap with one another (for example, he's interested in politics and law. I'm interested in art and music), we are each interested in the other and want to share these things but find that it takes lots of energy to really focus and understand the other in these areas. We LIKE each other very much (we even love each other, how about that) but we need friends outside the marriage to talk to about our own interests because it's draining to rely on each other for that. We like to just "be" together without doing a lot of talking. That sounds kind of lame and it's not that we don't talk about day-to-day matters. We just don't talk about certain things that we know the other one isn't naturally interested in. Maybe that's true of all couples, not just illusionary, I don't know. Not sure if this helps at all. He's ENTp by the way and I'm INFp.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

  7. #7

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    USA.
    TIM
    INTj
    Posts
    4,497
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    my experience is that illusionaries don't have the same global goals but have the tools to make each other comfortable. I think this is in keeping with this relation being called deactivating, slowing and lazy-fying. Have you considered your husband being your semidual, an ESFp? Just wondering.

    With my illusionary, ESTj, things can be jocular and comfortable (stagnant) but when I try to talk about something that will interest me the ESTj will shut off, first quietly and then loudly. The lack of understanding is mutual. It's a placating war. In fact, I will even say i have felt how some descriptions have said that the illusionary is someone you won't want to know further. But for some reason, you find it hard to leave. Its so.. comfortable and cozy.

  8. #8
    redbaron's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    9,321
    Mentioned
    16 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ms. Kensington
    my experience is that illusionaries don't have the same global goals but have the tools to make each other comfortable. I think this is in keeping with this relation being called deactivating, slowing and lazy-fying. Have you considered your husband being your semidual, an ESFp? Just wondering.
    Could be. I did feel like the ENTp description had several parts of it that described him perfectly but I will take a closer look at ESFp.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

  9. #9
    Jarno's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Netherlands
    TIM
    ILI-Te
    Posts
    5,375
    Mentioned
    30 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Elro
    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno
    High energy:

    Activity
    Semi-dual
    Dual


    Energy draining:

    Illusionary
    Could you elaborate on this a little? I've heard that Illusionary relations are positive ones. If so, in what respects are they draining?
    Yes, because the 1th and most used function of the illusionary partner is the same as your 7th used function.
    Whenever you have to use your 7th function, you drain energy. It's just a socionics fact.

    It has nothing to do that it is a nice relationship. In my experience it certainly is a nice relationship, but you also get really lazy when being with your illusionary partner.

  10. #10

    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    62
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Jarno, what about beneficiary-benefactor relationship?

    In which type relations do you normally feel the tension between you and the person right away? Super-ego and conflicting?

  11. #11
    Jarno's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Netherlands
    TIM
    ILI-Te
    Posts
    5,375
    Mentioned
    30 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by sara
    Jarno, what about beneficiary-benefactor relationship?

    In which type relations do you normally feel the tension between you and the person right away? Super-ego and conflicting?
    Suprisingly enough, in real life you'll at first feel respect for eachother in a SuperEgo relation.
    And mutual attraction in Conflict relation.

    It is only later on (weeks/months), that the conflicts start to arise.


    There is no relationship where negative tension takes place immediately. There is however a relationship which gives immediate (+/-within 5 minutes) friendship. It's activation.

    The quickest respons is in my own experience Illusionary. Of which the attraction can be felt in 1 second.


    In beneficiary-benefactor relations, you feel some sort of spiritual connection between the two of you.
    It has once even been described on this site as most commonly mistaken for an identical relationship.

  12. #12

    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    5,101
    Mentioned
    6 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno
    Yes, because the 1th and most used function...
    How funny is it that I actually read this the way it was spelled.

    "one-th."

  13. #13
    Don't forget the the thehotelambush's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    TIM
    LII
    Posts
    6,630
    Mentioned
    159 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno
    Quote Originally Posted by sara
    Jarno, what about beneficiary-benefactor relationship?

    In which type relations do you normally feel the tension between you and the person right away? Super-ego and conflicting?
    Suprisingly enough, in real life you'll at first feel respect for eachother in a SuperEgo relation.
    And mutual attraction in Conflict relation.
    I recently met an ISFj who (I'm assuming here) thought I was a bit annoying at first, but has grown to respect me more over time. So, yeah, it varies.

  14. #14

    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    62
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    but i have met people that i know i wont' get along with almost right from the beginning. we just have to talk and it's so so so obvious that we don't get along. and if there's no project or anything that's binding us, we don't talk to one another anymore and just nod to each other when we meet. and the feelign is mutual. what kind of relations do you think i might have with them?

  15. #15
    Jarno's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Netherlands
    TIM
    ILI-Te
    Posts
    5,375
    Mentioned
    30 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by sara
    but i have met people that i know i wont' get along with almost right from the beginning. we just have to talk and it's so so so obvious that we don't get along. and if there's no project or anything that's binding us, we don't talk to one another anymore and just nod to each other when we meet. and the feelign is mutual. what kind of relations do you think i might have with them?
    yes i've had those encounters too. But most of the time then you are judging them in an objective way.

    like, i don't like the loudness of how he talks. or i don't like the subject he keeps talking about. it doesn't immediately refer to a function. or better to say, you are not listen (or feeling) to how your functions collide or cooperate with that from the other person.

  16. #16
    Don't forget the the thehotelambush's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    TIM
    LII
    Posts
    6,630
    Mentioned
    159 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by sara
    but i have met people that i know i wont' get along with almost right from the beginning. we just have to talk and it's so so so obvious that we don't get along. and if there's no project or anything that's binding us, we don't talk to one another anymore and just nod to each other when we meet. and the feelign is mutual. what kind of relations do you think i might have with them?
    Either Identity or Conflict.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •