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Thread: How can you tell if a Beta loves someone?

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    Default How can you tell if a Beta loves someone?

    ISTj ESTp ENFj INFp

    Please tell us......I remain confused by the Beta's in my life...

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    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
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    Very very easy to tell in my case, if I am confident in reciprocity I'll gladly tell it multiple times and shower you with affection.
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    I'm not really inclined to verbalise my love. I expect people to just be able to tell. The time I share with the person speaks for itself.

    It bothers me when people need constance reassurance of my feelings towards them. It makes me think they are not enjoying the relationship for its own sake and are attached to the relationship for reasons of needing security.
    IEI subtype

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    I have two ISTJ's in my life...and they are very ambivalent....
    which makes them hard to read.....

    Believe me, I am not a person who needs petted or reassured...but this behavior does not provide clarity and makes it feel they are not steady in their feelings....creating issues that normally would not exist.

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    le petit prince raisonpure's Avatar
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    When I love someone more than I love my pride, I won't hesitate to utter sentimentalities to assure them that they're needed. Oh and, I'd seek them out and initiate conversations for more than 3 months.

    If I give vague responses even when someone really needs to know how I feel... Not love.

    When I hate someone, the silent treatment is the least that a person can expect. I just depleted a month's supply of energy from an hour of shouting at the top of my lungs as I hunted down my teacher (ESTj), condemning him in front of everyone and demanding that he repent for his childish ways. His refusal to comply (hell, he thinks I'm fun to play with... damn his fucking psychological games) angered me so much that I had an urge to punch sense into him while I was in a struggle over his mobile phone. Long story short, I tend to initiate confrontations and display overt aggression towards people I hate, and am more likely to say stuff like "You are DISGUSTING" with a murderous look.
    “I think, therefore I'll think" - Ayn Rand (ESTp, UR GUARDIAN ANGEL)

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    i dont know about other enfjs but when i was going out with my ex I've never felt happier...I used to have a smile on my face and people would always tell why are you smiling....So I guess that's one sign
    ENFj Ni subtype 3w4
    "And once you lose your way you have two choices. Find the person you used to be or lose that person completely"
    formerly onetreehilluver

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    Don't forget the the thehotelambush's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by islandgirl
    I have two ISTJ's in my life...and they are very ambivalent....
    which makes them hard to read.....

    Believe me, I am not a person who needs petted or reassured...but this behavior does not provide clarity and makes it feel they are not steady in their feelings....creating issues that normally would not exist.
    ISTjs can be very harsh, even to those they love.

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    Seeing ISTjs be harsh to the people they love like that, almost in a disrespectful way, solidified that I never was and never will be LSI.
    I could never get off on that and enjoy it the way they do, or understand why they so greatly want to be in a relationship when all they do is argue and complain and bitch about it.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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    Quote Originally Posted by UDP III
    I could never get off on that and enjoy it the way they do, or understand why they so greatly want to be in a relationship when all they do is argue and complain and bitch about it.
    there is flawed thinking here and it is yours. ISTjs do not enjoy being that way. it is more that they have trouble controlling it at times. my father used to always warn us when he was about to launch into GOD DAMMIT WHAT THE FUCK mode. he suggested we leave him be for a while so we did not get hit with the shards of it. whenever we would piss him off, he would insist that we not talk to him for an hour because he knew he would speak and act in ways he didn't mean. besides, ISTjs aren't all complaints, bitches, and moans. most of the time they are pleasant.

    to address the topic, i have noticed a lot of ISTjs have difficulty being overt about their feelings.
    IEI subtype

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    Quote Originally Posted by vague
    Quote Originally Posted by UDP III
    I could never get off on that and enjoy it the way they do, or understand why they so greatly want to be in a relationship when all they do is argue and complain and bitch about it.
    ISTjs aren't all complaints, bitches, and moans. most of the time they are pleasant.
    I've noticed tonnes of ISTj discrimination on this forum, I suppose because there's not many here to defend themselves. I need to do that Filatova translation. ISTjs are the most hard working responsible people I've met (in general). People dismiss them as mean because they don't show "positive emotions" or something but that's a shallow approach to judging someone. If you actually get to know an ISTj you'll see the goodness in their heart. Their ability work tirelessly to provide an adequate life for their loved ones is totally unmatched. Furthermore, in the case of my father, he barely EVER bitches or complains. He's the most quiet and reasonable person in my family's household (2 ESFj, 2 INFp, ESFp). Despite being the only logical type in my home he's been able to put up with all of our stupid emotional rampages and still spoil us in ways that make other kids jealous. He hardly ever says no to us, and he's no push over each other, if someone fucks with him he makes sure they know about, once some guy hit his car and tried to drive away, my dad followed the bastard till he stopped and made him pay for the bumper, he's fucking awesome
    INFp-Ni

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    ISTjs are complainers or bitchers or moaners or anything like that. ISTjs are among the people least likely to complain about their situation. Intuitives complain. Sensors act.
    asd

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    Quote Originally Posted by vague
    Quote Originally Posted by UDP III
    I could never get off on that and enjoy it the way they do, or understand why they so greatly want to be in a relationship when all they do is argue and complain and bitch about it.
    there is flawed thinking here and it is yours. ISTjs do not enjoy being that way. it is more that they have trouble controlling it at times. my father used to always warn us when he was about to launch into GOD DAMMIT WHAT THE FUCK mode. he suggested we leave him be for a while so we did not get hit with the shards of it. whenever we would piss him off, he would insist that we not talk to him for an hour because he knew he would speak and act in ways he didn't mean. besides, ISTjs aren't all complaints, bitches, and moans. most of the time they are pleasant.
    Oh I agree. My father is great generally, barely ever complains about anything except when I steal his clothes. I just think there is a large variation, depending on what, I don't know. An ISTj father of a friend of mine is authoritarian and suspicious, another one is super friendly and always throwing jokes. Just, people not types.
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    Quote Originally Posted by heath
    ISTjs are complainers or bitchers or moaners or anything like that. ISTjs are among the people least likely to complain about their situation. Intuitives complain. Sensors act.
    Not really, though I see your point. ISTjs complain more about what other people are doing wrong, the things they have no control over and are therefore unable to act on. I agree that their proactivity is admirable, but it can turn into a desire to control everything, which is obviously impossible. I do know of calmer, more reasonable ISTjs; I have great respect for them.

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    I know three ISTj's, and they are all easy to get along with. But they do not like to be fucked with. But other than that, the three that I know are all cool.
    "Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat."
    --Theodore Roosevelt

    "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
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    So, am I getting this correctly? If a beta says something that involves feelings, you can count on it as being true unless they state otherwise?

    I do not pick up on beta's playing word games....especially when it comes to their emotions and feelings........

    I had an ISTJ state:

    You are the only person I have ever felt totally connected to.

    I would feel that is a strong statement coming from that personality based on what I have read....????

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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG
    Just, people not types.
    I should have pre-disclaimed by post.

    I like ISTjs a lot, so long as they are "comfortable". When they are uncomfortable I cannot stand being around them, as, just like me, their second and personal knowledge function goes awry/overboard.


    ....My post was tainted with a very recent encounter with two ISTjs that I particularly didn't like. ....but I suppose that was me being weak That was a lousy post on my part.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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    Quote Originally Posted by raisonpure
    When I love someone more than I love my pride, I won't hesitate to utter sentimentalities to assure them that they're needed. Oh and, I'd seek them out and initiate conversations for more than 3 months.

    If I give vague responses even when someone really needs to know how I feel... Not love.
    Same for me.
    Quote Originally Posted by jxrtes View Post
    betas should be kept in zoos for children to stare and throw pop corn at.

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    Quote Originally Posted by raisonpure
    When I love someone more than I love my pride, I won't hesitate to utter sentimentalities to assure them that they're needed. Oh and, I'd seek them out and initiate conversations for more than 3 months.

    If I give vague responses even when someone really needs to know how I feel... Not love.

    When I hate someone, the silent treatment is the least that a person can expect. I just depleted a month's supply of energy from an hour of shouting at the top of my lungs as I hunted down my teacher (ESTj), condemning him in front of everyone and demanding that he repent for his childish ways. His refusal to comply (hell, he thinks I'm fun to play with... damn his fucking psychological games) angered me so much that I had an urge to punch sense into him while I was in a struggle over his mobile phone. Long story short, I tend to initiate confrontations and display overt aggression towards people I hate, and am more likely to say stuff like "You are DISGUSTING" with a murderous look.

    this whole thing points to ENFj for you
    SEE Unknown Subtype
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    Quote Originally Posted by misutii View Post
    I've noticed tonnes of ISTj discrimination on this forum, I suppose because there's not many here to defend themselves. I need to do that Filatova translation. ISTjs are the most hard working responsible people I've met (in general). People dismiss them as mean because they don't show "positive emotions" or something but that's a shallow approach to judging someone. If you actually get to know an ISTj you'll see the goodness in their heart. Their ability work tirelessly to provide an adequate life for their loved ones is totally unmatched. Furthermore, in the case of my father, he barely EVER bitches or complains. He's the most quiet and reasonable person in my family's household (2 ESFj, 2 INFp, ESFp). Despite being the only logical type in my home he's been able to put up with all of our stupid emotional rampages and still spoil us in ways that make other kids jealous. He hardly ever says no to us, and he's no push over each other, if someone fucks with him he makes sure they know about, once some guy hit his car and tried to drive away, my dad followed the bastard till he stopped and made him pay for the bumper, he's fucking awesome
    This is a good thread and a good post. Thought it deserved a bump.

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    Quote Originally Posted by misutii View Post
    I've noticed tonnes of ISTj discrimination on this forum, I suppose because there's not many here to defend themselves. I need to do that Filatova translation. ISTjs are the most hard working responsible people I've met (in general). People dismiss them as mean because they don't show "positive emotions" or something but that's a shallow approach to judging someone. If you actually get to know an ISTj you'll see the goodness in their heart. Their ability work tirelessly to provide an adequate life for their loved ones is totally unmatched. Furthermore, in the case of my father, he barely EVER bitches or complains. He's the most quiet and reasonable person in my family's household (2 ESFj, 2 INFp, ESFp). Despite being the only logical type in my home he's been able to put up with all of our stupid emotional rampages and still spoil us in ways that make other kids jealous. He hardly ever says no to us, and he's no push over each other, if someone fucks with him he makes sure they know about, once some guy hit his car and tried to drive away, my dad followed the bastard till he stopped and made him pay for the bumper, he's fucking awesome
    damn straight!!!

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    LSIs also have an awesome sense of humour, though it takes a bit of getting used to... They're excellent in a crisis too.
    Quote Originally Posted by Agee The Great View Post
    Nobody here...besides me, seems to know what SLE is except for maybe Maritsa.

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    Overall Filatova's Victim description seems to fit quite perfectly, at least in the case of IEIs (I have zero experience with EIEs and romance). Additionally my IEI best friend has this compulsive need to be constantly reassured that his relationship is fine. It was one of the reasons his SEE ex broke up with him.
    What do these signs mean—, , etc.? Why cannot socionists use symbols Ne, Ni etc. as in MBTI? Just because they have somewhat different meaning. Socionics and MBTI, each in its own way, have slightly modified the original Jung's description of his 8 psychological types. For this reason, (Ne) is not exactly the same as Ne in MBTI.

    Just one example: in MBTI, Se (extraverted sensing) is associated with life pleasures, excitement etc. By contrast, the socionic function (extraverted sensing) is first and foremost associated with control and expansion of personal space (which sometimes can manifest in excessive aagression, but often also manifests in a capability of managing lots of people and things).

    For this reason, we consider comparison between MBTI types and socionic types by functions to be rather useless than useful.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Aleksei View Post
    Overall Filatova's Victim description seems to fit quite perfectly, at least in the case of IEIs (I have zero experience with EIEs and romance). Additionally my IEI best friend has this compulsive need to be constantly reassured that his relationship is fine. It was one of the reasons his SEE ex broke up with him.
    Would you happen to have a link to said description? I'm not finding it on Google.
    4w5 sp/sx

    Please, direct all questioning of my self-typing to this thread. Thank you.

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    Lol. Example of two Betas in romance:

    *Heated, long, frustrated quarrel*.
    IEI: I miss you and would just squeeze you to death right about now.
    SLE: Me too. I miss you so much - you fucking bitch, I think I'm falling for you.

    Few days later.
    IEI: I love you.
    SLE: You love me?
    IEI: Apparently. You fucker.

    I'm usually upfront and honest about it - why withold that information?

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    They provide erotic massages? [sorry, I think that's delta]

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    Quote Originally Posted by shapeofthings View Post
    Lol. Example of two Betas in romance:

    *Heated, long, frustrated quarrel*.
    IEI: I miss you and would just squeeze you to death right about now.
    SLE: Me too. I miss you so much - you fucking bitch, I think I'm falling for you.

    Few days later.
    IEI: I love you.
    SLE: You love me?
    IEI: Apparently. You fucker.

    I'm usually upfront and honest about it - why withold that information?

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    In my case, you can tell from the way I do everything you say. If you're abusing it, though, I will gradually start to notice and will eventually confront you.

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    I've noticed that Fi/Fe types can usually tell that i'm in love by the way I look at the person. It's rather interesting & slightly embarrassing...

    You can tell I love somebody by my actions. You can tell I love somebody If I say it out loud... though I may be shy about it at first. I will never lie about those things.
    Quote Originally Posted by jxrtes View Post
    betas should be kept in zoos for children to stare and throw pop corn at.

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    ...been here longer than the fucking monarchy Ezra's Avatar
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    They will tell you. If they can say it uncomfortably once, twice, then comfortably after that (but still feel it) you know they're in love.

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    Well if they pay you unwarranted attention it's pretty safe to assume they want to have sex with you.

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    I do this for lust:

    Quote Originally Posted by crazedratsghost View Post
    Well if they pay you unwarranted attention it's pretty safe to assume they want to have sex with you.
    and this for love:

    Quote Originally Posted by Ezra View Post
    They will tell you. If they can say it uncomfortably once, twice, then comfortably after that (but still feel it) you know they're in love.
    Quote Originally Posted by Agee The Great View Post
    Nobody here...besides me, seems to know what SLE is except for maybe Maritsa.

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