Dating tips for the ISTp

[cracka]

It doesn't appear desperate if i text him? The last thing i want to do is come off being needy. And okay.....way too much info i'm sharing with you people.

NOT AT ALL...
A simple, "hey, I was just thinking about you, how's life treating ya?" would be fine. If you don't ever use text messages maybe you have an email, just send something that way... If you don't have that... Just call him.

The way you should look at it... If YOU like him, then it's up to you as much as him to make it work... so you may have to just slide those "traditional" ways to the back and call him up first. He may just as well be thinking the same exact thing you are... if I call will I seem needy, or desperate, etc...
hahahaha, I bet if your relationship went anywhere you two would actually talk about how scared you were to call the other when you first started dating. it'll make for good pillow talk later down the road...lol :wink:

[jessica129]

Something tells me this guy doesn't have an anxious bone is his body. He's rather intimidating. But thanks guys, I think i'm going to just give him a quick txt and tell him I had a good time. That doesn't look too desperate. If it does, oh well. If you like the person, i guess you should tell them that. I've learned not to play those games.

[Blaze]

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[jessica129]

Haha, yess...I get those quick butterflies in my stomach when i hear my little bleep notifying someone sent a txt. Good god it's been months since my phone has been ringing this much, i love it.

[Blaze]

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[XoX]

:-) sweet!! i'm in love so i want everybody else to be, too!

thank god for modern electronics....it makes so many things possible!

You built a handsome sex crazed android?

[Blaze]

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[Kim]

:-) sweet!! i'm in love so i want everybody else to be, too!

thank god for modern electronics....it makes so many things possible!

You built a handsome sex crazed android?

[Expat]

I think i'm going to just give him a quick txt and tell him I had a good time. That doesn't look too desperate. .

It looks friendly, not desperate.

[napalm]

I'm sorry if I'm derailing the post with my millionth and one dating disaster stories : /

That's okay. This thread got hijacked about 5 pages ago.


At least you're talking about ISTp stuff.

[jessica129]

Well, in ISTP news, he hasn't texted or called me back : (

[Expat]

Give him more time. Perhaps he'll still get back to you.

Men - of some types - are also concerned about looking desperate, you know.

[Blaze]

Well, in ISTP news, he hasn't texted or called me back : (

what did you text?

[jessica129]

I spoke too soo, lol. I just got quite a nice txt msg. Okay, so yeah, after this i swear i'm done being a nervous wreck and I'm done discussing dating problems.

[Blaze]

cool! don't talk about dating problems...talk about dating solutions, girl. :-)

[Topaz]

My dating tip for ISTPs would be this. If you do encounter an ENFP ask them questions about themselves. They will disclose just about anything to you if they trust you and in a very animated way. All you have to do is listen and either nod or say 'hmmmm'. A little bit of gentle teasing is also good. Naturally the tide will turn and they will ask you a lot of questions about you. You dont have to answer them all but do answer some. If you feel comfortable enough its always a good idea to respectfully touch an ENFP. By that I mean stand or sit close to them, lean into them as if you are trying to hear them when its noisy, or touch their arms or shoulders. Just a little really. Nothing too invasive. It will perk them up. Even if they were not so interested in you at first, pysical touch will begin to turn them around. Dont over do it. It sounds silly but it really works. I would not suggest heavy petting or anything like that at the beggining of a relationship. It will be seen as superficiality regardless of the social mores of our day.
Personally I love people with depth and sincerity. Wise ENFPs will observe how you demonstrate your values and beliefs and also how you treat and speak about others. Keep that in mind.

[Exodus]

My dating tip for ISTPs would be this. If you do encounter an ENFP ask them questions about themselves. They will disclose just about anything to you if they trust you and in a very animated way.

That sounds like something an extrovert would do naturally, especially an ENFp. But listening to what they have to say is definitely important. I don't think of myself as a "good listener" exactly, but it's something extroverts notice and appreciate.

[Topaz]

My dating tip for ISTPs would be this. If you do encounter an ENFP ask them questions about themselves. They will disclose just about anything to you if they trust you and in a very animated way.

That sounds like something an extrovert would do naturally, especially an ENFp. But listening to what they have to say is definitely important. I don't think of myself as a "good listener" exactly, but it's something extroverts notice and appreciate.

Yeah, extraverts do this more often than introverts. However if you want a particular persons attention and they havent noticed you then you have to take some initiative. Usually all you have to do to get the ball rolling is one or two questions. An ENFP would probably see through you anyway but be flattered that you would be interested in them. They would probably pick up the ball from there and start engaging you. Even if an ENFP is not interested in someone they might engage them to be polite or to at least give the other person a chance to show what they are about. You will seldom get a rude brush off. Its not in our nature to diliberatly hurt others.

[mikemex]

My dating tip for ISTPs would be this. If you do encounter an ENFP ask them questions about themselves. They will disclose just about anything to you if they trust you and in a very animated way. All you have to do is listen and either nod or say 'hmmmm'. A little bit of gentle teasing is also good. Naturally the tide will turn and they will ask you a lot of questions about you. You dont have to answer them all but do answer some. If you feel comfortable enough its always a good idea to respectfully touch an ENFP. By that I mean stand or sit close to them, lean into them as if you are trying to hear them when its noisy, or touch their arms or shoulders. Just a little really. Nothing too invasive. It will perk them up. Even if they were not so interested in you at first, pysical touch will begin to turn them around. Dont over do it. It sounds silly but it really works. I would not suggest heavy petting or anything like that at the beggining of a relationship. It will be seen as superficiality regardless of the social mores of our day.
Personally I love people with depth and sincerity. Wise ENFPs will observe how you demonstrate your values and beliefs and also how you treat and speak about others. Keep that in mind.

Except for touching, this is basically how it started between me and an ISTp girl I know. Hell, ISTp have a sense of humor I simply love.

[IcEPiCk]

all i can say is that i know a lot of istp computer dorks whose biggest hang-up (in terms of their career prospects) is not their education or intelligence but their incredibly horrible fucking attitudes

ya the problem is we are LAZY. We are unmotivated...

Thats the good thing about ESTPs... they are so cocky they have to prove themselves right. We are so cocky we dont need to prove anyone anything... Leads us to our own down falls. I still dont know what the hell I want to do, and the only time I ever felt motivated in my life was when I was chillen with an ENFP as weird as that sounds. If you meet the right person, they are our motivating factor usually. ENFPs make me want to improve. thats no excuse though. Anyways back to playing my video games

[jessica129]

Being unmotivated is the biggest curse you could possibly have. I have never felt so useless in my entire life. I went thru a little phase where I was quite motivated and ready to change....that lasted maybe a week. Now I'm back to complaining about it. Fun fun.

[IcEPiCk]

we are programmed to be lazy it would seem.. Our problem is we dont care about anything really. when we come across someone who makes us care, it feels pretty good... Jessica maybe we should make an ISTP farm where you just have a bunch of pets, booze, and all disgruntled ISTPs can chill until adopted by a loving enfp. However there would be one stipulation, no return policy.

[jessica129]

lol, i'm up for it

[Blaze]

huh, you guys think you're lazy? or just relaxed?

[jessica129]

I never actually thought of myself as 'lazy' until multiple people have so nicely chosen to point it out to me. And yeah, I guess in comparison to 99% of others, I am.

[leckysupport]

I never actually thought of myself as 'lazy' until multiple people have so nicely chosen to point it out to me. And yeah, I guess in comparison to 99% of others, I am.

I think that when people call istps lazy they are talking out of their asses, since lately I have been spending everyday from 10 am to 9 pm at uni working on my projects and I've made massive progress and some fuckers still summon it out of their fuckwit faces that I'm lazy.

Lazy to them just means you’re not doing the work they want you to do, which usually doesn’t even help the situation (even gets in the way) and you. It’s just a series of pointless tasks they made-up that never work (this is academia based).

[Slacker]

I agree, electric. People say my husband is lazy, but they just don't understand. He's very motivated *depending on the project*. If it's something he feels is useful and/or something he's interested in, he will work on it. He doesn't do things just because someone else wants him to do it.

He will, however, do it at his own pace. But his pace is fine. Why should he hurry rather than enjoy it.

[mikemex]

He doesn't do things just because someone else wants him to do it.

What if you ask him to do something for you???

[Slacker]

99% of the time he will do what I ask. The other 1% of the time it involves the kitchen sink, which he hates to deal with. But I know how to time things too. Like I ask when it's obvious he's looking for stuff to do or whatever. I don't get him when he's in the middle of building an engine or something.

[Exodus]

99% of the time he will do what I ask. The other 1% of the time it involves the kitchen sink, which he hates to deal with. But I know how to time things too. Like I ask when it's obvious he's looking for stuff to do or whatever. I don't get him when he's in the middle of building an engine or something.

"everything but the kitchen sink"

[Slacker]

He says it's awkward and uncomfortable to work under the sink. LOL But now it's the sprayer attachment that's broken. Does that involve climbing under the sink? Probably. I swear there's always some part of the sink that has a problem.

[meatburger]

He says it's awkward and uncomfortable to work under the sink. LOL But now it's the sprayer attachment that's broken. Does that involve climbing under the sink? Probably. I swear there's always some part of the sink that has a problem.

Im going to have to learn how to do that stuff. I cant see myself saying to an ISTp girl, hey honey could you fix the kitchen sink? Unless i take up knitting or something

[Reuben]

I was reading page one and laughing at all the ISTp's out there who knew that they were too charming but were fustrated that they couldn't translate that charm to real life. The only reason why they fail to do so is because they didn't have someone there to tell them, "I believe in you. I believe that you can achieve anything you want to. I believe that you can make everything that goes on in that sensual mind of yours come true." These ISTp's are posting their concerns up here to wait for you ENFp's to say exactly that to them.

I skipped all the way from the first the the last page, and realized that the topic has deviated, which either means most of the problems are already solved, i.e. the ENFp's on this board have sufficiently reassured the ISTp's of their Godlike abilities, or that nothing is solved and we, ENFp's and ISTp's alike (as we usually do) have forgotten about what the main point was. [If the latter was the case, then the unsatisfied ISTP's will still remember the fact that their ENFp counterparts did not take their cue. And thus their problem is not solved. And thus I write one more paragraph.]

Some advice to ISTp guys out there. The only women who will pick you up are the sensing types. You are not interested in them because they will compete with your strength The only women who will not resist your advances (you must either open your mouth or move your hands in a sexy way before they will, do it pied piper style) like your pet are the intuitive types. (ISTp guys like me love ENFp ladies because like pets, they are so easy to read and their emotions are so easy to play with. They are like part of nature and that is beautiful.) These kind of ladies won't know why they are waiting on your every movement, why they will listen to your every beck and call, but they feel a sense of insatiable attraction towards you. Just bait them with a little bit of information and ask them to follow you. Eg. "Hey you smell nice. *Lift up your manly but sensual hand to cue her to put her hand in yours. Look at her in the eyes very sternly and say* Come with me. Or you can stay to your own demise." After which, she will follow you. But you must fool her into thinking that you are going to find another lady, or another source of fun, because honestly, you really are, all else you will come on too hard. ISTp's only come on hard in bed and when they have the WHOLE of the ENFp lady's emotions, thoughts, sensations, and intuition *in* the tip of their fingertips.

Oh and one more thing, fellow ISTp men. No one can read your mind.

[meatburger]

Lol ok Blueblades that definately a different take on the subject.

If ISTp's feel sad about work im happy to take my que then to tell them they can do anything, but Maybe i dont want all the ISTp guys and girls going out and tuning the opposite sex to epic proportions. I would prefer they find little ENFp partners and be happy.

(ISTp guys like me love ENFp ladies because like pets, they are so easy to read and their emotions are so easy to play with

Hmm i agree that ISTp's are impossible to read but ENFp's getting their emotions toyed by ISTp's? Hmm doesn't seem like that in my reality.

[FDG]

Hmm i agree that ISTp's are impossible to read but ENFp's getting their emotions toyed by ISTp's? Hmm doesn't seem like that in my reality.

Opposite of the truth

[Topaz]

That was a good post Blueblade I dont know if its that easy but it was interesting to read. Heck maybe it is that easy I think the emotional manipulation goes both ways actually. Once "hooked" though I think ENFPs will go along with a lot, but so will an ISTP. ISTPs will resist their feelings as much as possible though because I dont think they like not being in control. I think thats why they sometimes go cold with the ones they love the most . Its an un/conscious desire to re-establish control. Getting ENFPs hooked does require some effort though. Sometimes ISTPs lose heart before they even begin. Or like you said they want people to read their minds. Since I am not quite that telepathic, I would love to read a similar post by an ISTP female. Im sure we ENFP guys would like to know what the ISTP female hopes/expects from the man of her dreams
PS Please dont say he has to be rich

[jessica129]

Am I the only istp female here? I'm quite simple in my desires. Money doesn't impress me. I don't know exactly what I look for...just someone who's accepting, non-judgemental and exciting.

[meatburger]

Am I the only istp female here? I'm quite simple in my desires. Money doesn't impress me. I don't know exactly what I look for...just someone who's accepting, non-judgemental and exciting.

Yeah thats practically the same for me. Im also looking for someone Loyal. My ex used to flirt with other guys in front of me and i really hated that.

If im honest with myself i really don't think im exciting. I can get Excited though lol. What i would hope for would be an ISTp girl that likes to do exciting things. Whilst im not going out doing exciting things, im definately not adverse to it and if someone invites me im there in a flash

[IcEPiCk]

I was an ISTP female until the operation... Now my name is Aman. It still bleeds sometimes! HELP MEATBURGER!

[IcEPiCk]

meatburger what you need is a boring old estj jks