what are you least likely to forgive?

[Joy]

Let's say you're talking to some casual acquaintance and they do something that you don't like... and it's enough that you'll actually avoid them whenever you reasonably can from that point on. What did they do?

My answers are:

1.) Touch me.
2.) Flirt with or hit on me.

More so the latter. There aren't many other things that people can say to get me to not want to talk to them anymore.

edit: the worst possible thing someone could do is tickle me... even someone I'm attracted to

[eunice]

I will be least likely to forgive people who criticize me, put me down infront of everyone else and talk about negative stuff all the time. I will keep quiet and walk away immediately when faced with such a situation.

[Creepy-bg]

that's a hard question because I'm pretty forgiving... I rarely cut people out of my life and when I do it's not because of situations like that (for instance when a friend tries to go sober or something I'll do all I can to distance myself from them out of respect and to help keep them from being tempted)

reason's I'd start avoiding somebody that involve getting pissed about something...

ummm....

basically if they just won't shut up... I can't stand people who talk constantly... or moreso I can't stand it when I'm around people like that. I don't bear them any ill-will, it's just that my brain doesn't deal with constant babble well at all. So I'll avoid those people from then on...

the worst type though are people who are stuck in a "everybody keeps trying to keep me down" frame of mind... all they can talk about is ex-partner/friend A who owes them or stole this or that and then their new partnership with person/friend B who's going to help him get person A and then everything will pick up and they'll be able to get an apartment and have their son move down because their bitch of an ex-girlfrind/wife won't let him talk to him because.... bla bla bla, bla fucking bla bla!... a person like that I will do everything I can to make sure that I never see or hear from them again.

other than that... I'm good with people, I can roll with just about anything and not let it turn into a situation where I'd never want to see them again.

[FDG]

Anything that has to do with telling me what to do and how to do it. No matter the level of acquaintanceship, I'll reply with extreme annoyance.

Another thing I hate is when people start arguing with you, but can't take a response back. I never, ever shut up when somebody argues a point with me, and anybody that can't take it is bound to get very nervous.

[meatburger]

1.) Touch me.
2.) Flirt with or hit on me.

Thats interesting. A lot of girls seem to like flirting its fun if its done right. I have noticed some people are touchy feely but im not a big fan of that either.

I agree with Eunice. I cut people out immediately who offend me too much. I have met a few people who do things like call me a fool or try to bring me down. It's often people who are insecure who do this. They often really want to be my friend but I generally just close up and dont let them back in.

[anndelise]

I'll cut out of my life anyone who depersonalizes me.
(Though sometimes it may take longer than a first time thing, maybe they were having a bad day or didn't mean it or such. But after a couple of repeat times, I'll protect myself by cutting them out of my life.)

The moment a guy attempts to touch my breasts without having me turned on beyond thinking. Instant attempt to cut.

Unfortunately, I still have lingering issues with asserting myself, so I usually wind up doing a half-assed job of saying see-ya.

[mustachio]

i have a problem with people who talk shit behind my back. irl, my spidey-sense warns me immediately who does what with whom. it is not long before i take offence. if it's pretty bad, i take revenge. if it's not too bad, i often use the person as my personal daily news or messenger boy and avoid them whenever i can.

[Mea]

Been thinking about how to reply to this thread.

Basically. If a situation is bad enough, for example, a friend who betrays me:
A friend a know for years. Who's suppose to know me real well. Because of some reason, betrays me in anyway.
Forgiving and forgetting is one thing. Because I usually don't dwell on something that negative for long. But I'd most likely not be as close to that friend anymore.

And the example that eunice and meatburger gave. I won't associate much with people like that. Chatting as acquaintances is fine, but I'd rather not let someone who affects me negatively into my life.
However, if I find the positive side to that person, things might change.
This has happened in the past. So I'm pretty open to anyone actually.

Joy's question

1) If someone were to do that, it's instant farewell, goodbye, hope I don't see you again.
2) Umm.. What's wrong with 2? Doesn't mean I'd have to entertain someone I'm not interested in who's flirting with me. Just ignore him?

[Joy]

1.) Touch me.
2.) Flirt with or hit on me.

Thats interesting. A lot of girls seem to like flirting its fun if its done right.

If someone does something like that I don't like... storm away. I give them a chance to not be obnoxious (yes, to me it's obnoxious even if it's "done right") by refusing to acknowledge them. I'll never think as highly of them or be totally comfortable or trusting of them, but I'll most likely keep interacting with them if they stop immediately. If they don't I do whatever I can to avoid them.

[Mea]

1.) Touch me.
2.) Flirt with or hit on me.

Thats interesting. A lot of girls seem to like flirting its fun if its done right.

If someone does something like that I don't like... storm away. I give them a chance to not be obnoxious (yes, to me it's obnoxious even if it's "done right") by refusing to acknowledge them. I'll never think as highly of them or be totally comfortable or trusting of them, but I'll most likely keep interacting with them if they stop immediately. If they don't I do whatever I can to avoid them.

It's pretty funny actually.
Love to observe stuff like that.

[cracka]

Let's say you're talking to some casual acquaintance and they do something that you don't like... and it's enough that you'll actually avoid them whenever you reasonably can from that point on. What did they do?

My answers are:

1.) Touch me.
2.) Flirt with or hit on me.

More so the latter. There aren't many other things that people can say to get me to not want to talk to them anymore.

I guess it's different if you mean that you don't like being hit on or flirted with by people you already know, that would change my train of thought in a second from what I'm reading and writing here, but...

Contrary to popular belief, the internet is not the only place to find a person to have a relationship with these days. I mean, how does one express that they like or want to get to know someone without that initial flirt or attempt to hit on them? How can you not like someone that's just, in a sense, "trying to get to know you?" It would be wierd to just walk up to someone in a store and, without saying anything else, ask them out on a date. That kinda messes with what's socially normal in this day and age doesn't it? but as I said, I think you may be just talking about people you already know so this paragraph may not need to mean anything anyway.

as to the topic of this thread, there's no better way to keep me from talking to you than by embarrassing me (not jokingly) and actually meaning to do it. If it's done for fun and I can see the humor in it, I don't mind.

[Gilly]

Inentionally hurting others
Willful ignorance

[Expat]

Another thing I hate is when people start arguing with you, but can't take a response back. I never, ever shut up when somebody argues a point with me, and anybody that can't take it is bound to get very nervous.

Inentionally hurting others
Willful ignorance

I agree with those.

Also, someone talking loads of nonsense about a subject; then, when you object and/or tries to correct them, get offended and/or laugh at you as if you were the one who doesn't know what you're talking about. Such a person has ceased to exist as far as I am concerned.

Lying intentionally.

[snegledmaca]

For me to purposely avoid somebody would be if I don't like interacting with them.

[vague]

Complaining takes top spot. Boring me to death is more of a ground for avoidance than offending me is.

[Khamelion]

It's hard to find something I wouldn't forgive if the person honestly deserved to be forgiven.

[Joy]

In my case it's not like I'm holding a grudge... I don't think they've done something morally wrong most of the time. It's just that a degree of trust is gone and I won't feel comfortable again because I'll be paranoid that they'll do it again.

[maze]

Let's say you're talking to some casual acquaintance and they do something that you don't like... and it's enough that you'll actually avoid them whenever you reasonably can from that point on. What did they do?

With that context,

I avoid people who I can't help. If they present me with a problem they are mulling over and I see that I cannot help them/offer them what they need, I avoid them like the plague. Their neediness cripples me.

[jessica129]

I can pretty much forgive anyone for anything. It's a blessing and curse at times. A curse because I know I shouldn't forgive some people after the things they've done but I can see all sides to every story...i just accept that people make mistakes. Life is too short to hold grudges, there's no point to it. Unfortunately, this leads some people to think they can walk all over me.

[implied]

I can pretty much forgive anyone for anything. It's a blessing and curse at times. A curse because I know I shouldn't forgive some people after the things they've done but I can see all sides to every story...i just accept that people make mistakes. Life is too short to hold grudges, there's no point to it. Unfortunately, this leads some people to think they can walk all over me.

same, this has been my problem more than a few times. then dealing with people who aren't as forgiving.

[.thursday]

mee too

[Blaze]

to answer the question, infidelity. betrayal.

[olduser]

i can't forgive people who build up a these small dislikes about other people and their actions. So much so that they become tense and nervous around others because they are the watchdogs of their own way of doing things. ahaha. ahahah.

[Creepy-Diana]

.

[discojoe]

Act aggressively toward me for reasons I deem unreasonable.

[aestrivex]

i find it very difficult to forgive infinite, unadulterated, braindead stupidity which has directly harmed or impeded me in some way.


an exemplary example of the stupidity to which i refer is that demonstrated by my idiotic, insane, obese, and thoroughly illogical health teacher (i think she's ESFj, although at a time i thought she was ESFp, contributing to the source of my confusion over my type. i'm still not sure about her).

there might have been perhaps one day in her class in which she and i didn't spend half the class time arguing about anything, usually about either the insane and unreasonable way she ran the class or about her complete ignorance of the subject matter. thankfully, i am now done with her class and can consider her as nothing more than a horrific memory. she literally taught nothing, knew nothing about biology whatsoever, and ran her class like a complete lunatic. god was she stupid.

[Minde]

Trying to remember times I've avoided someone, and this one time in high school came to mind, hehe. Last class of the day I had computer programming, and there was this really dorky kid that liked me, but I couldn't stand him. The bell is almost going to ring, and the way he and his friends are looking at each other and towards me, I know he's going to try to ask me out or something. So, I get all my stuff ready to go, I'm practically hovering on the edge of my seat as though it's a race. He's doing the same, crap! I decide to stand by the door, ack, don't get up, don't get up. I look imploringly at my teacher trying to send him "stall please" telepathically. He just looks amused like he's going to crack up laughing. The bell rings and I burst through the door, I'm not heading straight for my locker, I'm going to try to lose him. I'm speed walking down the hallways, dodging here and there, I glance behind me, ack haven't lost him yet. I take off up one set of stairs, across the school, down the back stairs, around the other side and up again, pausing to check the hallway. Coast looks clear. I rush to my locker, and start jamming stuff into my backpack. Close the door and OH NO! There he is, and there's nowhere for me to go. He says hi. "Hi." I say with absolutely not a shred of enthusiasm in my voice. Then he hands me a note. "What's this?" I ask. "Just read it," is all he says, blushes and hurries off the other way. I feel like I've just been served a subpoena or something. It's what I thought. Ugh. I feel ill.

Good story and well-told. (Why does it sound uncomfortably familiar...?)

To answer the original question, um, I guess I'd have to say repeated crudity and/or willful unintelligence. Being evil should be obvious, but I'll mention it anyway. And, of course, there's always special circumstances, like Diana's example.

[Creepy-bg]

Trying to remember times I've avoided someone, and this one time in high school came to mind, hehe. Last class of the day I had computer programming, and there was this really dorky kid that liked me, but I couldn't stand him. The bell is almost going to ring, and the way he and his friends are looking at each other and towards me, I know he's going to try to ask me out or something. So, I get all my stuff ready to go, I'm practically hovering on the edge of my seat as though it's a race. He's doing the same, crap! I decide to stand by the door, ack, don't get up, don't get up. I look imploringly at my teacher trying to send him "stall please" telepathically. He just looks amused like he's going to crack up laughing. The bell rings and I burst through the door, I'm not heading straight for my locker, I'm going to try to lose him. I'm speed walking down the hallways, dodging here and there, I glance behind me, ack haven't lost him yet. I take off up one set of stairs, across the school, down the back stairs, around the other side and up again, pausing to check the hallway. Coast looks clear. I rush to my locker, and start jamming stuff into my backpack. Close the door and OH NO! There he is, and there's nowhere for me to go. He says hi. "Hi." I say with absolutely not a shred of enthusiasm in my voice. Then he hands me a note. "What's this?" I ask. "Just read it," is all he says, blushes and hurries off the other way. I feel like I've just been served a subpoena or something. It's what I thought. Ugh. I feel ill.

lol all I can picture is you opening up his note and finding one of those Family Circus cartoons of your school with a crazy dotted line going from the computer room all around the school and finishing up at your locker.

You've gotta at least respect his determination

[eunice]

@ Diana and Minde: It sounds uncomfortably familiar to me too.

[Creepy-Diana]

.

[pezzonovante]

@ Diana and Minde: It sounds uncomfortably familiar to me too.

lol you mean ixfjs! I don't mind getting hit on by people I'm not interested in, I always feel bad and try to let them down easy.

[Going B. Zerk]

erm… late response but I’ll post it anyway.

I can pretty much forgive anyone for anything. It's a blessing and curse at times. A curse because I know I shouldn't forgive some people after the things they've done but I can see all sides to every story...i just accept that people make mistakes. Life is too short to hold grudges, there's no point to it. Unfortunately, this leads some people to think they can walk all over me.

Ah yes... Which usually leads to a biting remark from my part.

In the worst case however, I’ll least likely forgive serious treason.