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Thread: Hidden Agenda and Attraction to Things/Objects/People

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    pezzonovante's Avatar
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    Default Hidden Agenda and Attraction to Things/Objects/People

    This is something I have noticed in myself and others several times and led to me seeing a connection between one's hidden agenda and the different things they are attracted to.

    I first noticed this in my INFJ friend. My friend loves beautiful things. Especially women. He is obsessed with beautiful women and refuses to give anyone else a chance. He is the deepest guy ever but in that one area he is incredibly shallow, which he admits. His standards are so high that it is ridiculous. He also loves other beautiful objects such as clothes/cars/etc. He is looking for a sort of "perfect beauty" so to speak. He also loves food that is very fresh, and will throw away perfectly good food on the basis that it doesn't look fresh. I have noticed these tendencies in many other INFJs as well.

    When I made the connection between my friends love of beauty and his hidden agenda I decided to examine whether there was a similar connection in myself. Sure enough, I realized that I am very attracted to -ish objects - objects that convey power. I LOVE things like power business suits/big black sedans/impressive titles/weapons/etc.

    My ISTJ friend loves things - stuff that is going to last a long time. I see this in ISFJs as well, they want durability over all else.

    I had more examples but I just woke up and I can't remember them right now. This is just a theory, but I am interested in seeing if people on the forum see the same kind of attraction in themselves and others.
    ENTj




    "A conscience does not prevent sin. It only prevents you from enjoying it..."

    "All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds, wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act on their dreams with open eyes, to make them possible."
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    Damn. I love beautiful things too. I'm a sucker for clothes, graceful mannerism, flair, and all that jazz. OTOH, I tend to stay away from things that emanate power - they kind of freak me out, becuase there's some inverse proportionality between beauty and power, in my mind.

    In any case, I think you're right you're onto something. I wonder how would it manifest itself in matters? Like for positive emotions?
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    pezzonovante's Avatar
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    I think everyone prefers beautiful things, but hidden agenda types require it.

    I am not sure what kind of people/objects would appeal to someone who wants . Are there any things that you like so much its kind of odd? Anything that is excessive compared to others.
    ENTj




    "A conscience does not prevent sin. It only prevents you from enjoying it..."

    "All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds, wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act on their dreams with open eyes, to make them possible."
    - Thomas E Lawrence

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    I know that, to a certain extent, I like objects of power such as daggers and swords. I think I also like symbols of status or honour, although I can't think of any specific examples right now.

    What sort of things would represent :fi: exactly? I'm very aware of my Fi HA although I don't really know what would represent it..I dunno, I have a sort of intuitive understanding of how certain aspects of my life could be related to Fi, but I can't really think of any actual examples.
    ILI (Indescribable Lovemaking Inc.)
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    Default Re: Hidden Agenda and Attraction to Things/Objects/People

    Quote Originally Posted by pezzonovante
    I first noticed this in my INFJ friend. My friend loves beautiful things. Especially women. He is obsessed with beautiful women and refuses to give anyone else a chance. He is the deepest guy ever but in that one area he is incredibly shallow, which he admits. His standards are so high that it is ridiculous. He also loves other beautiful objects such as clothes/cars/etc. He is looking for a sort of "perfect beauty" so to speak. He also loves food that is very fresh, and will throw away perfectly good food on the basis that it doesn't look fresh. I have noticed these tendencies in many other INFJs as well.
    I can totally relate to that, and it's kind of embarassing 'cos I'm not practising what I preach. I admit that my standards of beauty are ridiculously high, but I feel shortchanged if I settle for something less.

    As for objects that convey power, I can be attracted to power business suits (especially guys wearing them), black sedans, impressive titles and all that stuff, but it is mainly because they look sleek and beautiful and thus make me feel good as a result.

    I don't really concentrate too much on things. As long as something looks good, I don't care about durability and comfort. Like I wouldn't mind spending a lot of money on a pair of beautiful shoes even if they hurt like hell.

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    from toronto with love ScarlettLux's Avatar
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    Hm, strange that you should mention this topic..

    I've been thinking of my weird little obsession with violence. Not really that I enjoy it or anything, but I link it to sexuality. Let's say... dominance/aggressiveness. I know it relates to me being a Victim Erotic type but I think I might go overboard with this.

    Is this related to craving of ? I like it when guys show control and awareness of what's going on around them... when they can tell me what to do and I'll just do it.

    But... my hidden agenda is Not sure how that really manifests itself. I like nerd/geeks? I really am attracted to intellectuality I suppose.. almost to the point of acting as a pseudointellectual myself ... I am drawn to those that provide an air of wisdom.. that seem to be able to explain things well to me if I asked, and can provide conversation for me...

    ?


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    Default Re: Hidden Agenda and Attraction to Things/Objects/People

    Quote Originally Posted by pezzonovante
    Sure enough, I realized that I am very attracted to -ish objects - objects that convey power. I LOVE things like power business suits/big black sedans/impressive titles/weapons/etc.
    That's the main point where you and I are different, as already obvious when you first posted and it might mean different subtypes (with you closer to Ni).

    I have an impressive-sounding (to some people) title that's even in my passport. However, when work colleagues use it, especially when we first meet, I am quick to ask them to drop it (even if the country's social rules demand use of family names). I dislike business suits although I wear one very often. A fast car to me is a means to get quickly from A to B.

    My attraction to -- I guess it's about real power, not the trappings of it.
    , LIE, ENTj logical subtype, 8w9 sx/sp
    Quote Originally Posted by implied
    gah you're like the shittiest ENTj ever!

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    This is a cool thread and I relate totally to Si seeking. I love beauty and have to have it in my life - in my surroundings, wardrobe, artwork, decor etc. I even listed it as a need in an in-line profile I did.

    Now....would someone please come up with examples for the 8 functions?

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

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    Quote Originally Posted by Blaze8
    Now....would someone please come up with examples for the 8 functions?
    Yeah, what would it be for ? I can think of anything other then pseudo intellectualism, but then again isn't that the "disease" of stubborn types that lack sufficient intelligence?

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    Default Re: Hidden Agenda and Attraction to Things/Objects/People

    Quote Originally Posted by Expat
    Quote Originally Posted by pezzonovante
    Sure enough, I realized that I am very attracted to -ish objects - objects that convey power. I LOVE things like power business suits/big black sedans/impressive titles/weapons/etc.
    That's the main point where you and I are different, as already obvious when you first posted and it might mean different subtypes (with you closer to Ni).

    I have an impressive-sounding (to some people) title that's even in my passport. However, when work colleagues use it, especially when we first meet, I am quick to ask them to drop it (even if the country's social rules demand use of family names). I dislike business suits although I wear one very often. A fast car to me is a means to get quickly from A to B.

    My attraction to -- I guess it's about real power, not the trappings of it.
    Whats the title? Lord Expat? Lol. I think having a title like that would be awesome...but I can see why you want people to drop it. It would definitely be cumbersome at times and could make people feel uncomfortable.

    I see that your hidden agenda is influenced by , thus you desire efficient power. Mine is more towards and , thus I want power that will lead to future benefits and image . Makes perfect sense.
    ENTj




    "A conscience does not prevent sin. It only prevents you from enjoying it..."

    "All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds, wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act on their dreams with open eyes, to make them possible."
    - Thomas E Lawrence

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    Hmm....

    ===
    ===

    I have no idea what to say about Si HA.
    It gets in the way more than I can think of any positive benefits.



    Anyone else with Si HA want to say something?
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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    Quote Originally Posted by UDP
    Hmm....

    ===
    ===

    I have no idea what to say about Si HA.
    It gets in the way more than I can think of any positive benefits.



    Anyone else with Si HA want to say something?
    Do you agree with what I said about people with hidden agendas being obsessed with beauty, fresh food, etc?
    ENTj




    "A conscience does not prevent sin. It only prevents you from enjoying it..."

    "All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds, wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act on their dreams with open eyes, to make them possible."
    - Thomas E Lawrence

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    Yes. As the LII description somewhere reads, food need not be 'pretty looking', but it must be fresh...and I would be a liar if I said I had no care for beauty.


    Hmm, I am not obsessed with beauty per se...
    But as an ESE can be obsessed with dressing herself up in just the right way, an LII could be also potentially superfluous with a mental theory, so it seems 'thoughtfully beautiful'.

    Beauty has an interesting relation to 'perfection'.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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    Let's go to fairyland Minde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by UDP
    Beauty has an interesting relation to 'perfection'.
    Very good observation.

    So... a connection between Si and Ne...


    EDIT: Never mind as to the rest. Anyway, there's still a connection.
    INFj / EII / FiNe
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    and hidden agendas = all that i do is done well (?)

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    Default Re: Hidden Agenda and Attraction to Things/Objects/People

    Quote Originally Posted by pezzonovante
    Whats the title? Lord Expat? Lol. I think having a title like that would be awesome...but I can see why you want people to drop it. It would definitely be cumbersome at times and could make people feel uncomfortable.

    I see that your hidden agenda is influenced by , thus you desire efficient power. Mine is more towards and , thus I want power that will lead to future benefits and image . Makes perfect sense.
    My title is Dr.-Ing., or Doktor Ingenieur, Doctor of Engineering -- same as PhD. Especially in Germany and Austria, many people think it's not polite not to address you by your title, so there I'm often called "Herr Doktor [Expat]".
    , LIE, ENTj logical subtype, 8w9 sx/sp
    Quote Originally Posted by implied
    gah you're like the shittiest ENTj ever!

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    HA = humor?
    Quote Originally Posted by Logos
    Holy mud-wrestling bipolar donkeys, Batman!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Elro
    HA = humor?
    Said another way: HA = HA HA HA?

    (Ouch)
    Quote Originally Posted by Logos
    Holy mud-wrestling bipolar donkeys, Batman!

    Retired from posting and drawing Social Security. E-mail or PM to contact.


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    Default Re: Hidden Agenda and Attraction to Things/Objects/People

    Quote Originally Posted by Expat
    so there I'm often called "Herr Doktor [Expat]" .

    no offense intended :wink:


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    Si HA....

    I am much more attracted to women who take care of themselves and look pretty than those who do not, and that is a somewhat mercenary mechanism.

    And the more I am aware of it the better I prefer to make myself look. I think LIIs who really have no idea about style are too caught up in their thoughts and intuition, combined with the Se polr of "what is". I think it is perfectly reasonable for Max. Robespierre to have been an immaculate dresser.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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