I need help typing my mom and the relationship we have.
My mom can't seem to relax, the slightest mistake made totally stresses her up. For example, there was once she was sending me to school, and she missed a turn. She was sooooo worried about me being late and her being late for work/or that she'd lose her way, and she was complaining non-stop. I don't quite understand it. How can she find a solution if she's so tensed up?
She hates disorder and mess. And to me, she's a perfectionist. Like when we were at Vancouver visiting out relatives during the winter, she was always worried about me or my dad being cold and kept asking if we need thicker sweaters. And because my dad and I aren't too bothered by the cold, she'd get all stressed up because she thought we'd freeze. If she forgot to take something when she has already left her house, she can grumble about it for the whole day, and it totally spoils her mood. And she tends to over-care for people that are close to her.
She's always trying to plan MY life, not only my life, but what I do daily. She'd tell me, lets do this on Sunday, and when Sunday comes, she'd assume that I agreed to her plans, when I didn't. And she'd get mad because I'd rather rest at home on Sundays(because of long saturday nights out). We can't seem to understand each other and this usually turns nasty.
And she's always paranoid about who I mix with and what I do to the extent of reading my diary when I was younger. Even taking my cellphone to read my messages. Or getting my friend's numbers and calling them. Not only does that irritate me, it irritates my friends too!
And she'd complain about me to my friends.
I feel that she's really bad around people, although she seems to be able to talk to strangers pretty easily. She'd say things that sound pretty insensitive to me, it appears that she doesn't think before she says anything. And she doesn't usually realize it when she offends or hurts someone with what she says.
Also, she can be pretty irrelevant when answering questions(not sure if this is type related). Example, few nights ago, she was watching this documentary on successful companies. And they were currently interviewing this particular company, when I ask her what that company dealt with, what do they do?
And she answered: I didn't watch the starting of the program, I don't know what this program is really featuring.
I asked her that 4 more times before she understood my question. I almost flipped!
O, and she loves to make small talk with anyone and everyone! To me, gossipping is a talent of hers. IMO, she talks too much and doesn't listen.
And she loves complaining about tiny details in her life. Either that or she'd pin all her life's unhappiness on me. She'd say I don't care for her enough, I don't show that I love her enough, or I do NOTHING for the family. There were times she said she would rather that I'm not her daughter. (I didn't take those last words too seriously as I figured she probably didnt mean it)
I think this description might be biased, but I tried my best.
I can't think of anyone whom I conflict so much with. And it upsets me because she's my mom.
So, any ideas about what type she might be, and the relationship we have?
O, and some pictures to help.