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Thread: How charming are ENFps really?

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    Memory of Tomorrow Reuben's Avatar
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    Default How charming are ENFps really?

    Are they really charming? And how do they charm people? Darn I've grown up for already 1/5 of my lifespan and have yet to charm the pants of people. Must have been fun ain't it? I've been single all my short short life (which isn't too common where I come from) and there's no one from the opposite sex close to me. Oh screw that, the only person who's actually remotely close to me is some supervisor I know who's getting on my nerves now. He's got a point though that being nice to everybody doesn't get you anywhere but it doesn't get you killed though. How do you graduate from being nice to being charming? That's what I want to know from you experienced ENFp's out there.
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    meatburger's Avatar
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    Hmm

    In the right mood yes we can be charming. An ENTp i knew called me charming once. Many types can exhibit charm i think. A lot of girls say my ENTj friend is charming. I have seen my ISTj dad also use a great deal of charm.

    Im finding im slowly learning charm more and more as i get older. I couldn't explain very well how to do it i think but i will have a go. Charm to me is putting a lot of things together. Looking someone in the eyes with a penetrating gaze, changing your voice tone(this is a big one) to be smoother maybe deeper. Change your voice to make yourself sound innocent maybe. Having a half smile or even grin on your face. Having a bit of spunk in what you say. Its fine to say something a little cocky and funny every now and then. Giving good compliments is a charming trait aswell.

    For instance a girl at work was looking at my phone the other day as i was showing her a picture of a huge snitzel i ate. She said, omg its so huge and i said "oh did you find my nude pics?" :wink:

    or today i said how hot it was at work and my team leader said to me it must be because of her. So i said, "well im only human, im not made of wood" She said "im old enough to be your mother", and i said "but your only 25 aren't you?" and gave her a smile. She would be in her late 40's. She liked it greatly, she was flattered.

    Im only good with girls im not interested in though, the ones i am i turn into a goof ball.

    "A friend once explained the difference between charm and charisma
    fairly succinctly: "Charm is the glow of a single candle in a dark
    room. Charisma is a chandelier that lights up the whole hall."

    read this mate, i just found it as you got me interested.
    http://www.wikihow.com/Be-Charming
    ENFp (Unsure of Subtype)

    "And the day came when the risk it took to remain closed in a bud became more painful than the risk it took to blossom." - Anaïs Nin

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    escaping anndelise's Avatar
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    *sniff sniff*

    according to that wiki-how link, I am sooooo not anywhere close to being charming.....

    *sniff sniff*




    *looks for a tissue*
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    This wiki-how "Be Charming" thing sucks. It's rife with stereotypes. *insert joke about the irony of nerds trying to tell others how to be social*

    Personally, I perceive my own attempts at charm as a shotgun approach. I make confident conversation with the person on a variety of topics, making note of the response to each, apologizing if I inadvertantly strike a nerve, until eventually I find one topic which they find extremely interesting and then discuss it (assuming I can, anyway).
    That faith makes blessed under certain circumstances, that blessedness does not make of a fixed idea a true idea, that faith moves no mountains but puts mountains where there are none: a quick walk through a madhouse enlightens one sufficiently about this. (A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything.) - Friedrich Nietzsche

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    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
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    It's all in the way you walk.

    By the way...

    Never argue. Remember if half of the people who hear your argument agree and half disagree, you have failed at being charming. What you say must be pleasing to 100% of the people who will hear it, whether they hear it directly from you or not.
    This is "How to be a wuss"
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    Quote Originally Posted by WikiHow
    Whether your praise is true or not, it must sound sincere!

    Never argue. Remember if half of the people who hear your argument agree and half disagree, you have failed at being charming. What you say must be pleasing to 100% of the people who will hear it, whether they hear it directly from you or not.

    It's good to have some premeditated compliments and phrases [...].
    Sounds like Mr Collins from Pride and Prejudice.

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    I hate obsequiousness. I like to tease people who are "nice" and shake them up. Sometimes I say just the opposite of what they expect, just for fun.
    Them--"Oh what a lovely baby that is"
    Me (deadpan)--"It's head is big"

    Them--"Dont you just love this weather"
    Me (nonchalant)-- "No. I hate it. I wish it would rain."

    Just a little shock to wake them up.
    Now for people who are natural grouches its just the opposite. Instead responding to their curmudgeon attitude I become irritatingly nice and sunny. Impudently mocking them.

    For some reason people begin to respond to all of this in a possitve way. They see I dont take myself or them too seriously and they loosen up and start to joke and have fun. Sometimes it doesnt work, but often it does.

    Topaz
    The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.

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    Quote Originally Posted by anndelise
    *sniff sniff*

    according to that wiki-how link, I am sooooo not anywhere close to being charming.....

    *sniff sniff*
    Hehe dont be silly im sure your infinately charming. That Wiki link did have a bit of crap but i did also find a lot of it relevant. Reading it again though that seemed more how to "get on" with people than to charm them.

    For some reason people begin to respond to all of this in a possitve way. They see I dont take myself or them too seriously and they loosen up and start to joke and have fun. Sometimes it doesnt work, but often it does.
    I have no doubt Topaz people love that.

    Today someone gave me some Mango licorice. My team leader asked me today what i had on my ear and i looked at her without emotion and said "Mango Licorice". She cracked up laughing and told me i said it as if its a common occurance to store licorice on your ear.

    ENFp (Unsure of Subtype)

    "And the day came when the risk it took to remain closed in a bud became more painful than the risk it took to blossom." - Anaïs Nin

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    Quote Originally Posted by meatburger
    Today someone gave me some Mango licorice. My team leader asked me today what i had on my ear and i looked at her without emotion and said "Mango Licorice". She cracked up laughing and told me i said it as if its a common occurance to store licorice on your ear.
    yeah stuff like that

    Topaz
    The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.

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    Today someone gave me some Mango licorice. My team leader asked me today what i had on my ear and i looked at her without emotion and said "Mango Licorice". She cracked up laughing and told me i said it as if its a common occurance to store licorice on your ear.
    That's funny. Sounds like something i'd say
    IEE-ENFp-Advisor subtype
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    Originally Posted by Lame Ass Website:
    9. If you like something or someone, find a creative way to say it and say it IMMEDIATELY. If you wait it will be viewed as insincere and badly timed. If you don't like something or someone, don't say it (and if someone asks you directly for your opinion, dodge the question). If you don't have an opinion on something that other people like, pretend that you like it.

    11. Never laugh at your own jokes. Don't worry if no one else laughs at your jokes.
    I guess im not charming according to the site.

    Oh well i know i can be charming in my own quirky sort of way.
    MBTI - INFJ
    Socionics - INFx

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    meatburger's Avatar
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    yea

    ok it sucks
    ENFp (Unsure of Subtype)

    "And the day came when the risk it took to remain closed in a bud became more painful than the risk it took to blossom." - Anaïs Nin

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