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Thread: Competition/Jealousy in Relationships...

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    Lady of the Night Nocturne's Avatar
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    Default Competition/Jealousy in Relationships...

    When it comes to competition and envy in relationships/with other people, what types/IM could this be? I would assume Se valuing types are more prone to this.

    For example, I've little doubt I'm Se valuing, and overall consider myself pretty healthy despite whatever type I am... but my unhealthy side stems from this stuff. Especially if any romantic interest is involved. Or even easily get envious of friends. A bit "catty", if you will.

    I'll give specific examples soon, as I'm about to head to work, but I was curious and thought it would spark a decent discussion.



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    possible specifics

    S types are more paranoid, overprotective and restrictive than N
    F types express it with more drama and openly than T

    Si/Se. Se - have higher inlination to physical control and power upon others, should lesser tolerate cheatings of the pair (not own cheating), triangles/polygamy, harder to allow a partner to go away, mb more suspicious and spy more often, more prone to physical ways of punishment and control, harder to forgive.
    Si should to look lesser jealousy compared to Se ones. Even when having the similar degree of negative feelings should behave calmer.
    Types examples: video bloggers, actors

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    hag's Avatar
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    always thought of ESI as the most jealous type.. tho i dont have any experiential backing. i guess the fi+se combination seems like it could be prone to that sort of thing, powerful feelings + Se territoriality. SEE too maybe but i see them as more whimsical and forgiving than ESI bc of creative Fi

    I'm very jealous, my self type is Fi lead. I didn't think i was the jealous type until i got into my first relationship, then i rlly surprised myself lol.

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    Lady of the Night Nocturne's Avatar
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    Thanks for the response haha. @thehotelambush mentioned to me that ESI tends to be prone to this.

    Honestly, I thought EIE was most prone to it.



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    I feel jealous an awful lot. Definitely keeping it in check compared to when I was younger, but it basically used to consume me at times and I'd be overwhelmed with those envious feelings.

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    Metaphysician thehotelambush's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nocturne View Post
    Thanks for the response haha. @thehotelambush mentioned to me that ESI tends to be prone to this.

    Honestly, I thought EIE was most prone to it.
    Theoretically speaking I don't see how it could be characteristic of anything other than Fi/Se. EIEs can be jealous but Fe tends to be less exclusive/"monogamous".
    The higher, the fewer

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    I care little for Socionics types anymore, but just as a human being I experience rather intense feelings of possessiveness in relationships at times. I tend to prefer a single intense attachment at a time, where in my mind a capable two-person team is formed. I don't like any intrusion into the team, because in my mind that implies that the existing two-person team is inadequate. Ironically, I am most drawn towards open, free-spirited, scattered, and high-maintenance women, who would likely be reluctant to settle down so quickly (and very fairly on their part I might add).

    Since I typically become close to very few people, and these people are usually romantic partners or prospective partners, I sometimes feel that their closeness to me is a liability, because they could use what they know about me to hurt me. It should go without saying, but this paranoia is rarely constructive.

    Quote Originally Posted by hag View Post
    I didn't think i was the jealous type until i got into my first relationship, then i rlly surprised myself lol.
    Same experience here. One thing I have learned is that it is ok to feel jealous, and people should not tell you to not feel jealous because this would be a violation of your boundaries, but it is not ok to act restrictively towards someone else as a result of jealousy, because this would be a violation of the other person's boundaries.

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    Lady of the Night Nocturne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thehotelambush View Post
    EIEs can be jealous but Fe tends to be less exclusive/"monogamous".
    Really? Interesting. How so?



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    I get jealous as fuck. Even when I dont get to go into work and other people are doing something I didnt participate in when it comes to work. In relationships hell yes I get jealous. Emotional, sexual, its all the same.

    My duals are flirta so its tough. Basically, you are coming home with me at the end of the night, I dont care what you did or did not do at the bar. I want to be your everything, as I put you in this same zone.

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    Metaphysician thehotelambush's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nocturne View Post
    Really? Interesting. How so?
    Fe's goal is to expand interaction, which includes the number of people you interact or relate with on any number of levels.

    I'm speaking mainly about abstract elements here, there is a lot of variation even within types that value Fe or don't.

    And, there's also a distinction between what you do and what you expect from others. Se can play into that.
    The higher, the fewer

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