Mrrrmaid Video Typing + some questionnaire answers!

[SaveYourself]

I’ll give an example of a caregiver I know and mentioned earlier. SEI, a visual artist, a homebody, a stoner, loves animals. Sometimes she will cook, her place is not much cleaner than mine but organized differently, and when it gets messy she’s unperturbed by it whereas I am thrown off. She’s married to a pretty eccentric guy and accommodates the eccentricity very well. She likes kids a lot and has good rapport with them but probably won’t ever have any.

She is not someone who’s taking care of any adult babymen, I am pretty sure she’d find that very draining and offputting. It’s fair to say the men in her life have provided her equal care as she’s given them. But she will still do very thoughtful things, like make a painting just for you based on your favorite colors and ideas. She’ll buy really comfortable objects, like the softest bedsheets you ever felt, which I’d have had a hard time finding even if I were looking for them. She’s a cozy and adorable person. She’s reassuring and wants you to feel good.

So I’d say this comes down to her point of view, her vibe, the climate she creates around her. Not some stereotype of a 1950s housewife.

This was good - but still not something I relate to. I think - even when we put 50s housewife stereotypes aside - I can't stress enough how far I go to avoid caregiving responsibilities. I don't date eccentric guys (they're usually strangely practical and boring when compared to me - even my parents have mentioned I tend to shoot for the boring guy, leaving me to be the eccentric and fun one). Animals I love, but I'm unsure about taking care of one. Kids I find okay and really don't think I want one. The mess in the house I can relate to - I'm usually unperturbed (except in other people's houses, then I get twitchy and uncomfortable even if mine is way worse). I'm not very cozy. Definitely tend towards being cutesy (which you flagged up as being a sign against EIE, and I said similar things above). I do give gifts pretty well though - I think because I'm so picky about gifts myself and people so often get it wrong for me I try to knock it out of the park for other people. I'll listen to what they talk about wanting / needing / like in the run up to their birthday and will maybe go as far as pretending I forgot and ordering it directly to their house instead of giving it to them directly so it's an exciting mystery when the perfect thing arrives

But outside of birthdays I don't do gifts. At a party I hosted recently someone else ended up taking over the cooking because I was avoiding doing it, even though it was my party (funnily enough, I think this guy is actually an infantile but he ended up doing the caregiving work). I am more inclined to do this sort of thing for friends but never ever do it for men I'm dating - who, like I said, tend to practical and more equipped to doing it anyway. Not just I won't do it, I'll find ways and reasons to wriggle out of doing it. I don't tend to have the mindset where I am actively looking for opportunities to help, practical or not. I think I'm very good at dramatic caregiving gestures (like gifts, lifting people up, defending them, throwing a party) but not on the day-to-day when I'm generally too self-absorbed. Definitely a Rachel, not a Monica.

Xiaviay used the word 'soothing', you've used 'cozy' and 'reassuring' and I'm not any of these things. And when people seek these things from me (like the boyfriend who was sick, or if someone is looking for emotional reassurance) I tend to try and worm out of it asap and feel really uncomfortable being in the position where they are depending on me for support.

[The Reality Denialist]

I have met extreme SEI. Very very artistic. In fact everything she touches turns into piece of art. She couldn't handle her day job and just started painting from dusk till dawn.

It is quite amazing what obsessions can do.

[SaveYourself]

As succinctly as possible for those who don't like long paragraphs: I'm very attached to the idea of being a good person and will make big obvious displays of doing this but unless its big I tend not to do it. Things that need maintenance and responsibility are avoided.

I won't care for a sick boyfriend but would do a first aid course (actually just did a training session last week and wanting to do more)
I won't do hosting (in the practical sense) but will throw parties (in the fun sense of just getting people round my house)
I won't look after an animal but am vegan for animal rights
etc etc etc

[Desert Financial]

I don't date eccentric guys (they're usually strangely practical and boring when compared to me - even my parents have mentioned I tend to shoot for the boring guy, leaving me to be the eccentric and fun one).

What would you think about dating a guy who actually panned out to be more eccentric than you?

You mentioned that you enjoyed people who expressed their (nerdy) passions and interests over a sustained period of time. Many eccentric people tend to express themselves this way.

[The Reality Denialist]

Someone could say that SEI wants to capture ILE in her/her house for voluntary hostage. Probably gets lots of ideas how to practice art in new contexts etc. Generates better social ties for the eccentric.
ESE is probably someone who handles socialization problems for LII. Tells LII how to be around company of people and protects LII from external pressure. LII helps to structure ESE's life logically.

Like I have written before ILE seems to carry schizotypal (eccentric) qualities and LII has some autistic qualities.

[Exodus]

Yeah I just don't think I have the 'edge' associated with EIE. The whole thread going on at the moment about -Fe in EIEs and them having negative emotions is completely foreign to me. I seem to lack that negativist Ni pessimism.

Negativity is not a necessary trait of an EIE, just one typical one.

Plus, it's better to type based on what you are rather than what you're not.

Yeah I think the 'extreme' is the Fe. Everyone tends to know what I'm feeling at any given time regardless of whether I want them to or not Politics to me is always very generally discussed. I'm not very good - or interested - in technical political debate (I can leave that to my Ti-ego dual I guess) To me it's more about overarching ethical principals, which I love discussing, and then politics should be the implementing of these. So if I debate it, it's like "this is right / wrong", "this political party is corrupt", "there needs to be more attention paid to this issue." But also I find it exhausting and emotionally draining to be in the thick of it. Usually I have no problem picking sides, though. Sometimes I'm maybe too black & white if anything.

I think the victim / caregiver thing might fall into place once I know my type based on ego functions. I feel like more of a victim but I'm not sure I want an aggressor. And I've never actually properly dated an infantile so I don't know for sure I wouldn't enjoy that or pick up the caregiving once I was with one. Like I said above, I'm very protective so maybe if I was actually presented with someone who sucked at Si and kept getting sick I might suddenly step up to the practical caregiving (though the only time I remember being with a sick boyfriend he whined about his illness and I was just like "lying in bed thinking about it just makes it worse - get up and get over it" loool so maybe not. I also tried to cook him a meal once and completely fucked it up so never attempted again). So yeah, it's either working out my creative or dating loads of boys to figure it out, which ever is quicker and easier

Extremeness is also associated with Se though.

As succinctly as possible for those who don't like long paragraphs: I'm very attached to the idea of being a good person and will make big obvious displays of doing this but unless its big I tend not to do it. Things that need maintenance and responsibility are avoided.

I won't care for a sick boyfriend but would do a first aid course (actually just did a training session last week and wanting to do more)
I won't do hosting (in the practical sense) but will throw parties (in the fun sense of just getting people round my house)
I won't look after an animal but am vegan for animal rights
etc etc etc

ok, see this is very clear - you prefer the "idea" or "doing it big" rather than the practical, everyday thing. Very much seems anti-Si ego.

[SaveYourself]

What would you think about dating a guy who actually panned out to be more eccentric than you?

You mentioned that you enjoyed people who expressed their (nerdy) passions and interests over a sustained period of time. Many eccentric people tend to express themselves this way.

I actually meant nerdy in the boring-ist sense of like, an interest that isn't fun and exciting but something the person is really into. I guess like if someone talked to me (or anyone on this forum) about typology. It's eccentric in the sense that it's a bit out of the norm but not in that it really affects lifestyle, which is how I took Golden to mean 'eccentric'. I like people who study things for fun. My BFs also have had nerdy hobbies (Warhammer, D&D, Yugioh etc) but all of these things tend to make them seem more boring to the average person rather than eccentric. But this might just be me having positive connotations with the word eccentric to mean cool, fun, wacky and nerd with boring, down to earth (though the two could probably overlap in the sciences - like Doc Brown)

[golden]

As succinctly as possible for those who don't like long paragraphs: I'm very attached to the idea of being a good person and will make big obvious displays of doing this but unless its big I tend not to do it. Things that need maintenance and responsibility are avoided.

I won't care for a sick boyfriend but would do a first aid course (actually just did a training session last week and wanting to do more)
I won't do hosting (in the practical sense) but will throw parties (in the fun sense of just getting people round my house)
I won't look after an animal but am vegan for animal rights
etc etc etc

Well, I will do all those supposedly Si things just because for me they have been part of the responsibilities I’ve gradually needed to take on over time to be functional in my particular life. When I was your age I hadn’t done them, except for physically help abandoned animals, and if my life had turned out differently, I might never have.

So cool, I’ll be Alpha with shitty Si, and you can be Beta with maybe not a lot of Ni (just sayin’ the latter Bc I still don’t see much of it).

Anyway the reason I wrote about the SEI was not to provide a template of what I think “caregiver” should look like but to point out it doesn’t have to mean what people keep saying it does.

ETA, I meant eccentric as in the guy’s ideas are consistently weird from a mainstream POV. But he lives a pretty mundane and straightforward life and has practical abilities.

[SaveYourself]

Well, I will do all those supposedly Si things just because for me they have been part of the responsibilities I’ve gradually needed to take on over time to be functional in my particular life. When I was your age I hadn’t done them, except for physically help abandoned animals, and if my life had turned out differently, I might never have.

yeah this is one thing I've said a few times that maybe I'm just immature / haven't found the right guy / been in the right situation to see the appeal. I do do those things on the left column if required, but will try to get out of them if I can whereas the right column I will devote a lot of energy to. I'm sure if my partner got seriously sick I would switch to stereotypical caregiving, SF or not.

So cool, I’ll be Alpha with shitty Si, and you can be Beta with maybe not a lot of Ni (just sayin’ the latter Bc I still don’t see much of it).

Yeah that's fine. I'd have shitty Si as an alpha as well so straight up rejected from both quadras If you have time to explain, what would Ni 'look' like to you?

Anyway the reason I wrote about the SEI was not to provide a template of what I think “caregiver” should look like but to point out it doesn’t have to mean what people keep saying it does.

ETA, I meant eccentric as in the guy’s ideas are consistently weird from a mainstream POV. But he lives a pretty mundane and straightforward life and has practical abilities.

I gathered the first bit - it's just that even in yours and Adam's and Lilith Iris's counter examples, I haven't seen any of myself in the attitude. None of the particulars or the general vibe.

Also, yeah maybe I have a too-positive view of the word eccentric but it still wouldn't describe any of the boys I've dated since they've usually been the strong & stable normal to bounce my eccentricity off.

[Guillaine]

Hey Mermaid I just watched the vid and I would say SEI -si 4w5. A lot of Si in your eyes and voice, very smooth. Sei are softly spoken.
Only other credible for me is ESE-Si

edit- sorry rethought subtype sei-fe

[Blue]

IEE. I'd say for sure a Delta NF. Your answers about not liking edgy, mean sarcastic humor, or not wanting to climb the social hierarchy that your friends did points away from Beta. You don't have that aggressive competitiveness of Se, or sound like you value it much in others. I also don't see how you could be SEI when your Si sounds pretty unimportant to you as shown further in your earlier posts here.

[Breather]

My lack of information means my typing is definitely not something to consider and I will need to rewatch video time and time again I guess. Whatever type you consider yourself I think that is most likely .

As for my rough guess, EIE-Fe
As for the reason why, no idea

[Guillaine]

Hey Mermaid I just watched the vid and I would say SEI -si 4w5. A lot of Si in your eyes and voice, very smooth. Sei are softly spoken.
Only other credible for me is ESE-Si

edit- sorry rethought subtype sei-fe

Mermaid sorry to confuse you I think you are probably EII. I changed my mind overtime sorry. Have you decided your DNHC type because that influences it too.

[SaveYourself]

Mermaid sorry to confuse you I think you are probably EII. I changed my mind overtime sorry. Have you decided your DNHC type because that influences it too.

haha EII was my original typing. At being soft spoken, I'm not really - I'm usually told off for being loud and have even practiced intonation and projection whilst trying to get over social anxiety. There were just other people in the house and I didn't want them to hear me monologue about myself.

As for DNCH I'd say D or maybe C but that's only at a cursory glance. I haven't looked into it yet since I think it's probably best understood once I know my actual typing and bringing it in earlier in this thread just led to more confusion (I'm D if IEE but C if EIE etc)

[Guillaine]

haha EII was my original typing. At being soft spoken, I'm not really - I'm usually told off for being loud and have even practiced intonation and projection whilst trying to get over social anxiety. There were just other people in the house and I didn't want them to hear me monologue about myself.

As for DNCH I'd say D or maybe C but that's only at a cursory glance. I haven't looked into it yet since I think it's probably best understood once I know my actual typing and bringing it in earlier in this thread just led to more confusion (I'm D if IEE but C if EIE etc)

Ok sure I haven't read the whole thread sorry. You weren't convinced of that typing then obviously. I guess I like to consider everything all at once (with DCNH) and I find it has a significant influence, but that's the way I am not a step by step person. And I can see how it could cause confusion with everyone's opinion but maybe just consider it on our own. Eg if you were EII and D you would have more Fi or C more Ne etc.

There are many reasons why I don't think you are IEE, I am aware that any generalisations tend to get backlash though so I am hesitant to make broad statements. For example you can usually see with IEE a bit of Se on first appearance, stiffness in the head and neck, also another thing is you seem to be subtly more attuned to your interlocutor than an IEE, responsive and intent to communicating outwards to a feeling being, like you are already aware that that other person, even if it is a screen, has feelings and will respond with feelings. Hard to explain. Etc.

[silke]

the look reminds me of Amy Winehouse whom I think was some IP type, sp-last, and probably SEI

[SaveYourself]

Ok sure I haven't read the whole thread sorry. You weren't convinced of that typing then obviously. I guess I like to consider everything all at once (with DCNH) and I find it has a significant influence, but that's the way I am not a step by step person. And I can see how it could cause confusion with everyone's opinion but maybe just consider it on our own. Eg if you were EII and D you would have more Fi or C more Ne etc.

There are many reasons why I don't think you are IEE, I am aware that any generalisations tend to get backlash though so I am hesitant to make broad statements. For example you can usually see with IEE a bit of Se on first appearance, stiffness in the head and neck, also another thing is you seem to be subtly more attuned to your interlocutor than an IEE, responsive and intent to communicating outwards to a feeling being, like you are already aware that that other person, even if it is a screen, has feelings and will respond with feelings. Hard to explain. Etc.

Yeah I basically now think, for the reasons you mentioned here plus a few others, that I'm Fe-dom. So the problem I'm having is between those two types. I think my most common types I've been given are IEE, SEI, EIE, ESE in that order. But, like you said, IEE doesn't work. Personally I think I'm too dominant to be SEI (sidenote: a couple of pictures recently have been taken of me talking in group settings and even though they're always casual settings, I look like I'm giving a lecture to an attentive audience rather than just chatting haha). Fe also seems to be my dominant function, IMO. So ESE or EIE. More people see me on the Ne-Si axis than Se-Ni axis but there's a few things integral to the SiFe type I don't fit with, mostly to do with caregiving.


@silke
That's a cool look-a-like I haven't been given before but yeah, we have the same face shape, eye shape and approach to make up. At the very least, I currently identify as sp-last. I'll take it anyway because the only look-a-likes real life friends have given me are Mara Willson and Anne Frank.

[Sol]

So ESE or EIE. More people see me on the Ne-Si axis than Se-Ni axis but there's a few things integral to the SiFe type I don't fit with, mostly to do with caregiving.

It's important to take into account who said you those types. The majority of forumities have bad general qualification and a mess in their heads from theory's part.
As you see you are closing to my opinion about your type as EIE.

You may use my bloggers examples of LSI vs LII, LSI+SLE vs LII+ILE and other IR to understand people of which types you prefer and such to get own type.

[SaveYourself]

It's important to take into account who said you those types. The majority of forumities have bad general qualification and a mess in their heads from theory's part.
As you see you are closing to my opinion about your type as EIE.

You may use my bloggers examples of LSI vs LII, LSI+SLE vs LII+ILE and other IR to understand people of which types you prefer and such to get own type.

Haha, yes - that is my current favourite typing. It's bolstered by the fact that I generally like / agree with (as much as my newbie mind has the capacity to agree with) your typings of celebrities and other members. I just want a full understanding for myself and the ability to rule out any other type before committing to it. I don't think I can draw a clear argument for why EIE over ESE yet but am maybe getting there. When I do I'll declare you lord socionist.

As for the members typing me on the Si axis- there are quite a few ranging from new to experienced so I'm unwilling to disregard it just yet.

[Sol]

I don't think I can draw a clear argument for why EIE over ESE yet but am maybe getting there. When I do I'll declare you lord socionist.

IR effects may help a lot on the final step to distinguish between EIE and ESE. My bloggers list or IR test may help you in this.

If sometimes there will be _objective_ proof that I type good, then we may play in the lord and the princess or alike. At now I only claim that mistake lesser than most people on forums.

[Bastard]

IEE.

[SaveYourself]

I'm actually going to close this thread because it somehow has gone on longer than other type me threads and become a bit of a monster (Ti-dual seeking??)
IEE is the most popular typing for me but I actually gave my reasons for ruling it out in this thread - not that I expect anyone to invest the time to read through the whole thread but also I don't want to reply to every new IEE typing I get when I already explained it All of which contributes to why I think it's time to close shop here.

I now consider myself ExE and probably EIE. Feel free to @ or PM me if you have an opinion and I am always up for discussion. I also have a written questionnaire that I answered but never posted if someone really loves typing people that way and wants to look it over (again, just PM). If not, thanks everyone for contributing anyway. And if I do turn out to be IEE then please pray for my future SLI husband because I have a pretty convincing Fe act going on that I'm sure he'll just LOVE