Semi Dual and Duals

[17types]

I can't seem to find anything about semi duals and duals and peoples experiences of them.

I've never experienced being in a relationship with a dual before until a few months ago. The relationship did not last, but that was more on account of me ending it as I believe he is not ready for a serious relationship (as much as he persisted in telling me he was - action vs words), nothing else annoyed me tbh, and coming from me that is truly rare.

My housemate is a semi dual and I found him annoying in certain things he would do. He was as entertaining and jokey as my dual, and would crack the same sort of jokes as my dual but there was an underlying annoyance when he would do it - it was odd, and I never knew why until socionics.


Me - ISTp
Dual - ENFp
Semi - ENTp

Any interactions, life stories..... go full steam ahead.

[Adam Strange]

You can't find anything? You just have to type the terms Socionics, LSI, and EIE into Google.

Here is a start. Open these links with Chrome, wait for Chrome to ask you if you want the page translated, then say Yes.

https://socionik.com/thread/17500-0-.html

https://socionik.com/thread/17500---...tml#1211502074

Also, there is this to wade through: http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...lity-Relations

Or this: http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...type-Relations
.

[17types]

Honestly, I couldn't...
So thanks for the links ! I will have to see if they are useful though... I notice people tend to go off topic in this forum.

[timber]

Look at the wiki, click on the sociotype, scroll down.

http://www.wikisocion.net/en/index.php?title=SLI

[17types]

Just to clarify !

I am looking at personal experiences.

Dual and semi dual experiences in ones life.

[Sol]

I can't seem to find anything about semi duals and duals and peoples experiences of them.

There is the clear theory of IR. But people have the influences of nontypes factors and mistype a lot, - this is significant problem of practical experiences decriptions for IR.

> I believe he is not ready for a serious relationship (as much as he persisted in telling me he was - action vs words)

You had no serious feelings between each other and hence both were not ready. In case of love and high mutual compassion he'd followed your wishes and you had the high possibilities to influence on him. You'd had the attitude to accept each other "as is", but not to blame each other for the problems. It's a pair - anything in it is the _equal_ responsibilities for the both. If the other does not do what you think as needed - you do this or help him to do that, you like two hands. So all the problems in a pair is the responsibility of the both, - any problem is in your responsibility too and in _same_ degree. The degree people in the pair understand and feel this approach to the responsibility - is the degree of their love.
Love often needs _your_ efforts and sacrifices. With egocentric approach you don't establish good relations and do not get deep love feeling. To get the dude in good IR is not enough - you need to love him to get good relations. Good IR just allow this easier. If that was dual indeed - you've lost the good chance for good relations, including because of what you did and felt to him.

[timber]

Try the sub forum back logs.

[nefnaf]

Approximately 12.5% of all interpersonal interactions between two people fall under either duality or semi-duality. Quite a hefty number!

Real life interactions are highly variable and dependent on innumerable circumstantial factors like psychological distance, nature of the relationship (family, colleagues, friends, acquaintances etc), age, gender, cultural background, marital status, as well as DCNH subtypes. The last is actually type-based, although subject to change under rare circumstances.

[Rebelondeck]

If you're looking for trends, you won't find them because the reasons for relationship successes and failures are far too numerous. For this reason, I wouldn't trust any correlations because when there are an infinite number of possibilities, information is mostly anecdotal and not applicable to another relationship. I was in a 4-year relationship with my semi-dual and we got along famously but I eventually found out that she was dishonest, manipulative and unfaithful. I'm in a successful relationship with a dual but that's simple luck because most relationships with them were stillborn. I have also had excellent relationships with superegos and bad ones with mirrors. Use Socionics to help understand people - not to determine with whom you will associate.....

a.k.a. I/O

[17types]

Funny you should note that your semi-dual was - dishonest, manipulative and unfaithful. I saw this in my now 'ex' housemate, my semi. After 6 months of living with him (observing him) I could read him like a book in the end.

Also totally agree that there are alot more variables to a relationship than just the socionics.
If only meeting a mate was as easy as... <me Tarzan, you Jane> ... actually scrap that. They too had their fair share of issues at the start.

[Adam Strange]

Funny you should note that your semi-dual was - dishonest, manipulative and unfaithful. I saw this in my now 'ex' housemate, my semi. After 6 months of living with him (observing him) I could read him like a book in the end.

Also totally agree that there are alot more variables to a relationship than just the socionics.
If only meeting a mate was as easy as... <me Tarzan, you Jane> ... actually scrap that. They too had their fair share of issues at the start.

Dating is tough. With so many people available and so many options come high expectations for success and satisfaction. Presumably, as our machines get to know us better, we'll be able to arrange to have better and better matches, until one day, in the far future....

https://www.baen.com/Chapters/978145...637892___9.htm

[Guillaine]

I was in two long relationships with semi duals, both over 4 years both in important times of my life, one of which I had a child with. I am still processing what this means in terms of socionics. there were non socionics problems too, immaturity etc. There were also good things and bad things from the influence of instincts and enneagram. I was annoyed a lot by them, yet I was too hard on myself to be able to handle the barrenness and aloneness (confrontation with myself) of being with a dual ( I have had many short relationships with them). They are kind of the opposite, semis are impossible to leave, duals are super easy to leave. Duals feel rough and scary (like entering a desert), semis feel comfortable like going to a fun party (they were alphas I am IEE they were SEI and short term with SLIs). Maturity is probably the biggest factor and I think as I am more accepting of myself I don't need what my semi offers (validation of my feelings etc I can do that on my own) and feel ready to venture into dual territory a bit more steadfastly. I don't know if this is useful. I have many unanswered questions about it myself.

[Sisyphean]

Haven't had any experiences with Semi-Duals that I'm aware of. Interactions with my duals, though have always been the smoothest and most magnetic interactions/relationships I've ever had. With roughtly equal maturity both sides just seem to "get" each other while not often seeing the shortcomings of the other as flaws. Rather "you suck at that, but that's my domain, anyway. I got this." The stuff you hold back on normally can be set loose and without worry cause the other side digs on it.

Probably the only instances where "be yourself" didn't turn out to be a trap.

[Myst]

You can't find anything? You just have to type the terms Socionics, LSI, and EIE into Google.

ISTp is SLI, not LSI.

Haven't had any experiences with Semi-Duals that I'm aware of. Interactions with my duals, though have always been the smoothest and most magnetic interactions/relationships I've ever had. With roughtly equal maturity both sides just seem to "get" each other while not often seeing the shortcomings of the other as flaws. Rather "you suck at that, but that's my domain, anyway. I got this." The stuff you hold back on normally can be set loose and without worry cause the other side digs on it.

Probably the only instances where "be yourself" didn't turn out to be a trap.

Where do you get the impression of "you suck at that, but that's my domain, anyway. I got this"? Examples?

[Myst]

To OP: Yeah, duality for me does involve way less annoyance/states of anger than anywhere else... also, it's the only relationship where I get realllly involved. This is while I'm still myself in many ways, though of course I'm changed a bit because my default is more separate/isolated than this. And, the dual actually gives something practically useful in life without you having to make any effort to integrate it for yourself first. In my case this means that in addition to experiencing more emotional involvement in general, I also get to try more things with people in a natural way, and in general just gaining more experiences with my dual providing emotional involvement for them.

I think this is the quickest way to sum it up for me.

PS: Not that there is anything wrong with having to make the effort yourself to integrate some stuff for your own superid. It's good for your own development to do some of your own effort for it. I find Activity relations great for that but sometimes even Mirror helps.

[Sisyphean]

Where do you get the impression of "you suck at that, but that's my domain, anyway. I got this"? Examples?

Primarily from interaction with @Luminous Lynx over some years and observation of what we're somewhat confident is an SLE/EIE (Activity, I know, but same pairs of Ego & Super-Id functions) duo on youtube. I'll let him speak for himself but I never have gotten the sense that my weak Fe or Ni were something bothersome or irritating as opposed to a he automatically accounts for, and on the same token, his weaker Ti and Se have never bothered me since I feel I generally have that well "in hand" and seek out more of the positive saturated atmosphere and insites of ego Fe Ni.

With the youtube duo there's a frequent pattern where she makes up the Fe "slack" in response to blunt and crass statements the SLE makes, and the SLE making up for the EIE's frequent reluctance to "just do/say the thing, already."

Of course I may be complete off-base, but I don't think so.

[Memento Mori]

Probably the only instances where "be yourself" didn't turn out to be a trap.

I'm not as wary as muh LSIs (PoLR Ne I suppose), but this obviously rings true for me as well, to a greater degree than with others. There are many intertype relations of ease, but Duality and Activity relations obviously mobilize and balance out types in unique and formative ways.

"you suck at that, but that's my domain, anyway. I got this"

It's as simple as my Super-Id block being his Ego block, and vice versa, basically. Neither feel uncomfortable picking up the other's slack so to speak. Where I falter he prevails, and vice versa (implying LSIs ever falter). This is true to greater and lesser extents between Dual and Activity types, as the Ego block of one is the Super-Id block of the other (which is probably why intertype calculators also rate Activity pairing extremely highly). The one thing I'm not clear on is how Your quad members help address one another's PoLR, or if that's simply a given not meant to be 'fixed', but to be sublimated into other processes. If @1INT Vault Dweller is off-base, then I am too hahah. I'm still acclimating to Socionics, but what I understand thus far makes this clear enough.

[lemontrees]

Duality has historically involved more angst for me?

I've had fights with my dual exes, my dual uncle, my dual boss...

There are also duals I feel 100% always alright around.

But when you have different expectations it can get more amped up than usual.

~

Semi dual is not bad, only there's a sense of not syncing. Small things they do that make me go

[Myst]

Primarily from interaction with @Luminous Lynx over some years and observation of what we're somewhat confident is an SLE/EIE (Activity, I know, but same pairs of Ego & Super-Id functions) duo on youtube. I'll let him speak for himself but I never have gotten the sense that my weak Fe or Ni were something bothersome or irritating as opposed to a he automatically accounts for, and on the same token, his weaker Ti and Se have never bothered me since I feel I generally have that well "in hand" and seek out more of the positive saturated atmosphere and insites of ego Fe Ni.

With the youtube duo there's a frequent pattern where she makes up the Fe "slack" in response to blunt and crass statements the SLE makes, and the SLE making up for the EIE's frequent reluctance to "just do/say the thing, already."

Of course I may be complete off-base, but I don't think so.

Oh I was mostly interested in how it's conveyed "you suck at that...".

I'm not as wary as muh LSIs (PoLR Ne I suppose), but this obviously rings true for me as well, to a greater degree than with others. There are many intertype relations of ease, but Duality and Activity relations obviously mobilize and balance out types in unique and formative ways.

It's as simple as my Super-Id block being his Ego block, and vice versa, basically. Neither feel uncomfortable picking up the other's slack so to speak. Where I falter he prevails, and vice versa (implying LSIs ever falter). This is true to greater and lesser extents between Dual and Activity types, as the Ego block of one is the Super-Id block of the other (which is probably why intertype calculators also rate Activity pairing extremely highly). The one thing I'm not clear on is how Your quad members help address one another's PoLR, or if that's simply a given not meant to be 'fixed', but to be sublimated into other processes. If @1INT Vault Dweller is off-base, then I am too hahah. I'm still acclimating to Socionics, but what I understand thus far makes this clear enough.

I think only the Dual really addresses PoLR.

[Memento Mori]

I think only the Dual really addresses PoLR.

I wasn't claiming otherwise, lass. I took "you suck at that" to mean the Super-Id functions, the lower 'valued' functions. Given my bud liked my post, I'm going to assume I didn't misconstrue this :3

[Myst]

I wasn't claiming otherwise, lass. I took "you suck at that" to mean the Super-Id functions, the lower 'valued' functions. Given my bud liked my post, I'm going to assume I didn't misconstrue this :3

Ah I originally meant all weak functions.

[Sisyphean]

Oh I was mostly interested in how it's conveyed "you suck at that...".

Oh okay lol. I don't really just say it or see anyone just say it, since it doesn't really need to be said. It's just mutually understood and one seems to automatically jump in to pick up the "slack" where the other is weaker without either side being put-off or feeling particularly burdened by it.

I'm very much aware that my Fe and Ni are pretty shitty. That can be pretty handy when an EIE needs to cut through the bullshit in a problem they're presented with, but sometimes I get locked into and get "tunnel vision" without too much regard to how things can play out 6 steps down the road which they will address and make part of the consideration.

[Myst]

Oh okay lol. I don't really just say it or see anyone just say it, since it doesn't really need to be said. It's just mutually understood and one seems to automatically jump in to pick up the "slack" where the other is weaker without either side being put-off or feeling particularly burdened by it.

I'm very much aware that my Fe and Ni are pretty shitty. That can be pretty handy when an EIE needs to cut through the bullshit in a problem they're presented with, but sometimes I get locked into and get "tunnel vision" without too much regard to how things can play out 6 steps down the road which they will address and make part of the consideration.

What is your tunnel vision like?

[Sisyphean]

What is your tunnel vision like?

Mostly a myopic focus on 1 option or possibility as the answer to whatever question is being asked. A friend is having an issue with a girl, and I just see my one way forward. Co-workers and I hitting a road-block in some client work and I just doggedly go after my one seen solution and don't register the ones noticed or opted for by my co-workers that are sometimes easier or better.

[Myst]

Mostly a myopic focus on 1 option or possibility as the answer to whatever question is being asked. A friend is having an issue with a girl, and I just see my one way forward. Co-workers and I hitting a road-block in some client work and I just doggedly go after my one seen solution and don't register the ones noticed or opted for by my co-workers that are sometimes easier or better.

So what tends to get you out of that?

[Adam Strange]

So what tends to get you out of that?

I also tend to go for what I think is the "one best solution" and I ignore the other possibilities. I know this hurts me in optimizing solutions.

This isn't exactly something that I "get out of". Rather, I think it's baked in to who I am, so I make a conscious effort to ask other people for solutions or alternative possibilities. It's not easy to do when you already believe that your solution is best, and it doesn't get easier when you hear, time after time, solutions which I've already considered and rejected, but often enough, someone will point out something that I overlooked because of my "best solution" tunnel vision, and the times when that happens make the effort to seek out other solutions and listen to them completely worthwhile.

[Guillaine]

The first time I experienced a dual I was 16 and 17 over two summers fell utterly for the lifeguard at the local pool SLI-si 5w4. I thought it was that he had traveled, had life experiences, used to go to Chile and surf every winter, but now I see it was dual attraction. I just thought he was the most amazing person, I would sit and listen to him while he talked about anything, my friend had no idea why I was so worked up. I was just getting into poetry and all that too so... He might have been into me though he was older but when I told him I was a Christian and wouldn't have sex before marriage that killed that. I was so conflicted about it all. Eventually I kind of confronted him and he rejected me saying to go and marry a doctor. I sat outside the pool distraught in the dirt car park and, typical 4, I rubbed dirt all over my face in my grief. Someone must have seen me and reported me to the pool because then he came over and told me to wait. Then he drove me home, bought me some water and tried to wipe my face but I wouldn't let him.

[Sisyphean]

So what tends to get you out of that?

I'll let you know if and when I ever can break out of that habit without someone grabbing me by the lapels and shaking me and then pointing me at alternate solutions lmao

[Myst]

I'll let you know if and when I ever can break out of that habit without someone grabbing me by the lapels and shaking me and then pointing me at alternate solutions lmao

Lol ok, I'm like that too btw with the tunnel vision stuff.

Though this method would not really work on me lol, I'm too stubborn, however I find Fe setting the right mood first helps for some reason to make me more open to hearing some stuff. I find though that only the Fe of EIE is powerful enough for that... IEIs kind of just do too small "Fe pokes" lol. Do you relate to this at all, I'm curious.

[Sisyphean]

Lol ok, I'm like that too btw with the tunnel vision stuff.

Though this method would not really work on me lol, I'm too stubborn, however I find Fe setting the right mood first helps for some reason to make me more open to hearing some stuff. I find though that only the Fe of EIE is powerful enough for that... IEIs kind of just do too small "Fe pokes" lol. Do you relate to this at all, I'm curious.

Lol well it works to make me aware of other options. Most times my response is still "Hmm. Neat. I'm gonna get back to doing it my way, now." I'm not sure I know any IEIs or EIEs in the situations where this happens since most area at work these days, but whether it's an "Fe poke" or not lol one thing that has worked is when the alternative actually is superior and I get shown up as using an inferior method. I will usually dig in my heals for an hour or two and then relent when nobody is "looking" (most work communication is over instant messaging) and start working with the other idea.

[Myst]

Lol well it works to make me aware of other options. Most times my response is still "Hmm. Neat. I'm gonna get back to doing it my way, now." I'm not sure I know any IEIs or EIEs in the situations where this happens since most area at work these days, but whether it's an "Fe poke" or not lol one thing that has worked is when the alternative actually is superior and I get shown up as using an inferior method. I will usually dig in my heals for an hour or two and then relent when nobody is "looking" (most work communication is over instant messaging) and start working with the other idea.

Lol that's some pride there. A bit familiar, sometimes =)