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Thread: How would an Fi person react?

  1. #81
    MrsTortilla's Avatar
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    May 2018
    ESI-Se C—>N
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    Sometimes when my LSE dad wants to help me (if he sees me in some emotional distress for instance) he'll deliver one of these short speeches, sort of similar to the initial post.

    "You are behind schedule on dating - If you had siblings, they could share the responsibility of having grandchildren, but unfortunately since you are an only child it is your responsibility. You’re a member of this family. You can’t just think about yourself."

    There is a possibility that while he believes everything he said verbatim is true, having seen you @lemontrees so heartbroken he may now worry you are lonely and so he wants you to date, because he thinks it'll also just be good for you. He might be trying to just take care of you in his own way. LSE's, ime, don't like to see discord or sadness in their family or their children.

    His words DO make total sense to me, though as an ESI I don't think I'd put it that way (ever) to my own kids. He's probably right, but saying it that way is unhelpful.

    If my kids asked my opinion, or seemed very against having children, I'd let them know that they should do what they want, but that 1) from my experience having children is extremely rewarding and also important as it gives you family connection in old age. 2) I might also share how many of my friends from my youth (artists, writers, musicians, etc.) didn't want to have kids and instead wanted to focus on their own pursuits. This was fine but then they spent so long on themselves that by the time they were desperate to have children (late 30's into early 40's) it was either too late for them or really really hard to conceive - a nightmare. 3) I'd tell my kids how I know childless couples in their 50's and 60's who deeply regret not having children, and how some of them have become very eccentric having never experienced the maturation caused by raising a child yourself. 4) And also how I truly wish I had had my kids younger, because the love we share is so great it would have been nice to get to experience it for even longer in life.

    All that said, I don't like people to tell me what to do so I might be very annoyed if my dad said that to me. ;-)
    Last edited by MrsTortilla; 07-11-2018 at 11:23 PM. Reason: typo

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